The Foreign Papers
by javamomma0921
Summary: AU - Bella Swan is an expert in antique documents. When the paper trail she is following leads overseas and she finds herself enamored with an enigmatic man named Edward Masen, will her training be enough to help her solve the mystery surrounding him?
1. Across the Pond

_Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements_

_Even if it leads nowhere?_

_Or would it be a waste even if I knew my place_

_Sould I leave it there?_

_**Adele**__, 2008_

_**Disclaimer**__: These characters aren't mine, but I do love to play with them. SM owns all. But, you know, respect the parts I added? No copying. ;)_

_Thank you to Swimom7 and SparklyBabs for pre-reading this and encouraging me to re-post this as its own story. Much love to both of you._

* * *

"Ms. Swan," a cool voice called from the doorway.

Bella looked up, startled, and pushed the specialized magnifying glasses up so she could see who was calling her. She blushed immediately when her boss, Lauren Mallory, came into proper focus. Ms. Mallory looked impatient; her lips were tight and she was tapping her foot.

"Oh! Ms. Mallory!" Bella cried nervously. "I'm sorry. I was just going over the documents you left with me."

Bella gestured to the yellowing papers on the table. The bright overhead lights as well as the strange backlit table made them glow. Bella just stopped herself from caressing the documents with her gloved hands lovingly.

"And?" Lauren asked. "What do you have?"

"Well," Bella said as she leaned over the table, her voice high with excitement. "They appear to be authentic letters from the seventeenth century. Here," Bella pulled the glasses down over her eyes and motioned for Lauren to come over. She sighed when the woman stayed rooted to her spot but bent over her work, continuing her explanation. "There are indicators in the ink here – and here – that show us it was likely plant based and of the variety we would expect to find from that time period in England."

"But are they from the family we're searching for?"

Lauren's insistent voice grated on Bella's nerves, but she swallowed her frustration and simply shrugged her shoulders.

"With the bottom halves of the letters missing or destroyed, it's nearly impossible to determine who wrote the letters."

"Anything else?" Lauren asked with a sneer.

"The letters make mention of a woman named Esme. I don't know if that means anything to you?"

Suddenly, Lauren's face spread in a smile for the first time since Bella began working on the woman's documents.

"That's … that's very good," she said. "Esme is one of the names associated with the Cullen clan. Yes, this is very good indeed. Mr. Masen will be pleased."

"I must caution you, Ms. Mallory, that the name Esme is not uncommon for this time period. It's possible we've hit upon nothing more than a remarkable coincidence."

"Oh, but we are so close," Lauren cooed at her, finally entering her workspace. "I know it is in your nature to be cautious and careful—it's why I pay you so well—but let us just, for now, revel in a partial victory, shall we?"

Bella removed the glasses and smiled at the eccentric woman.

"Who is this Mr. Masen that you spoke of?"

"He is my connection in England," the older woman cooed. "He is a private man; there is no need to go into detail."

Bella was used to her boss's secrecy. She thought it made Lauren feel more important to have secrets to hide from others and she didn't press her on details.

"So … what now? Are there more documents that you wish me to examine for you?"

"Yes, indeed there are. Bella, I'd like you to go home early and pack yourself a bag. You'll be traveling tomorrow."

"Traveling? To where? What do you mean?"

Bella didn't enjoy surprises. In fact, as a rule, she despised them. She'd risen out of her chair in her agitation and now stood towering above Lauren.

"Hush, my dear. All of your expenses will be paid. And really, this is the chance of a lifetime for you. There are more documents, they just happen to be across the pond. And you are more easily transited than those precious documents, don't you agree?"

Bella didn't like the idea of being "transited" anywhere, but she agreed that she wouldn't want precious documents such as the ones in front of her to be removed from storage and sent on a transatlantic flight. Going to them was definitely the better option.

"I will give you details when you arrive in the morning," Lauren explained, reaching an arm around Bella's shoulders. "I'll likely set you up on the red eye for London tomorrow evening if that is ok with you? I expect you will have all your things in order by then?"

It was phrased as a question; but Bella understood it was a directive, not a question.

Bella left the rare artifacts room of Ms. Mallory's personal library after asking for the morning off to arrange her affairs. Jake would need to be taken care of and her dad would have questions. She thought she might be able to kill two birds with one stone, however.

She took Jake to the dog park and then brought him, his bowl and his favorite chewy over to her father's house. Charlie kept a bag of his kibble at the house and Bella thought she'd have better luck talking her father down from his worries if she just showed up at the house with Jake than if she called first. It would give him less time to think up questions.

* * *

"Honestly, dad, I'm not sure how long it's going to take," she said again, running her hands through her hair distractedly. "But this is a big opportunity for me. Can't you please take care of Jake for me while I'm gone?"

"I don't mind taking the dog, Bella, it's you I'm worried about. You barely know anything about these people and now you're going to travel halfway across the world for them? I think it's a mistake."

Bella sighed and resisted rolling her eyes. She walked over to the fridge and picked out two cans of beer and handed one to Charlie. He took it grudgingly and looked at her, waiting. He wasn't giving up.

"They're my employers, Ch-dad." She bit her tongue as she tripped over his name. "It's only natural that they would pay my expenses on a business related trip. Besides, I'm going to be doing what I do—looking at old documents. Really, how much trouble could I get into?"

He shuddered at her words and then began laughing as he cracked open the beer.

"This is you, Bells. You might not want to tempt your luck there, baby doll."

She hugged him and sat back in the chair, popping open her own beer. "I'll be fine. I promise you … nothing worse than a paper cut will befall me in the jolly old land of England."

Charlie questioned her for a little over an hour, but finally relented when she stood her ground. She found the more she talked about the impending trip, the more excited she became. The trip meant a brand new group of colleagues and a different set of documents. It could lead to opportunities she hadn't dreamed possible when she was holed up in Lauren's tiny library.

As she packed later that night, deciding what she would need, she began to think about the unknowns. She knew she would at least get the opportunity to do some research at Oxford. If nothing else, _that_ was worth it. She wondered what treasures she would encounter, what secrets the documents might hold for her. And who knew connections she might make? She'd always dreamed of doing extended work in England. Maybe this was her chance.

When she laid her head down on the pillow that night, far too late, she found she was actually excited about trip. Even if nothing came from it, it would be a change from the dull routine her life had fallen into during the past few years.

* * *

The flight was rough. There was no other way to describe it. Bella hated flying to begin with, and had a routine to get through it. But even her iPod and her requisite Jameson's before take-off couldn't fix this flight. Turbulence and a loud seatmate kept her up all night so that she arrived with burning eyes and an addled brain. She was thankful no one from the University was meeting her at the airport; she was not in shape for first impressions.

The cab pulled up to the hotel and Bella stepped out of the cab, bleary eyed and ready to make acquaintance with the nearest feather bed. The walls of the building had to be hundreds of years old. Directly in front of her was the weathered face of a stone lion's head, blackened by time and the rain. In her sleep-deprived state, Bella regarded the lion with a loopy smile before nodding her head at it. If a light touch at her elbow hadn't startled her, she might have bid it good day.

"Isabella Swan, I presume?" a smooth, English accented voice addressed her.

Bella turned around and had to look down. In front of her was a bright eyed young woman who stood roughly a head shorter than her. Her eyes were the strangest color of green that Bella had ever seen. In her sleep deprived state, she nearly asked the woman if she was wearing contacts.

"You are Bella Swan, are you not?" the woman asked. "You've come from the States?"

"I'm sorry," Bella replied. "Yes. I'm Bella Swan. And you are?"

"Alice Brandon. I'll be your guide and liaison while you are in Oxfordshire. The lobby's this way."

Alice turned on her heel and marched toward a heavy wooden door. It was shaped like a drawbridge and came complete with iron studded nails in the wood.

"What is this place?" Bella asked, running her fingers over the mossy stone walls.

"This is the Old Parsonage Hotel," Alice said. "It was built in the 17th century. She's quite a gem, wouldn't you agree?"

Alice turned around and flashed a devilish grin at Bella before pulling open the enormous door. When she stepped inside, Bella felt as though she was in another world. The rustic beauty of the mossy stones outside had given way to chic elegance on the inside. Everything was polished mirrors and deep burgundy. Bella thought she might have stepped into the middle of a swank club, not the lobby of a hotel.

Alice got her checked into her room in record time, running through all of the paperwork and details in under ten minutes.

"I assume you'd like some time to freshen up? Perhaps catch a spot of shut eye?"

"Is it that obvious?" Bella asked, grimacing.

Alice nodded kindly.

"You look absolutely dead on your feet," she said. "Go catch a wink of sleep. I will be back in …" she looked down at her watch, "just about three hours to collect you and bring you to the college to meet your fellow researchers."

The room was amazing, but Bella barely noticed it. She was asleep almost immediately and awoke, disoriented, some time later. She looked around the darkened room wildly, trying to remember where she was. The light seemed wrong and the smells were off. Jake wasn't laying on top of her. She knew she definitely wasn't at home.

The flight came back to her slowly. She was in England on business.

"Shit!" she cried, sitting up suddenly.

It shouldn't be this dark. It should be mid-morning. _How the hell long have I been sleeping?_

She pulled her hair out of her face and squinted across the room to try and see the clock. It wasn't digital so she couldn't see it, but she _did _see the figure of a woman sitting in a chair watching her. Bella cursed again.

"Hello, Isabella," the woman said.

The voice was vaguely familiar, but Bella couldn't place it immediately. Something about the voice made her quell the impulse to scream; she recognized it from somewhere, but her addled mind still couldn't put a name to it. The woman switched on a light which made Bella squint painfully. The spiky hair, the strange green eyes …. Bella remembered her. The small woman sitting the chair was Alice Brandon. And she was going to take Bella to Oxford to meet the rest of the team.

"Alice," Bella said unsteadily. "You frightened me. How did you get in here?"

"I have a key. I've laid out your attire for the evening. We have approximately forty-five minutes to prepare for dinner."

"Dinner? How long did I sleep?"

"It is six o'clock right now. I left you at nine this morning. So…nine hours? I tried to rouse you to bring you to meetings at the college, but you were impossible to wake. We thought this would be a better option. Do you feel more rested?"

"No! I feel like I got run over by a bus," Bella grumbled, throwing the covers off and hopping out of bed.

Her stomach rumbled loudly, but Alice didn't make any comment. Bella couldn't remember eating on the plane or since she'd been in London. That made it almost twenty-four hours since she'd eaten. No wonder she was starving.

"I also brought a protein bar for you," Alice said as Bella breezed by her toward the bathroom, "so you won't be ravenous during dinner."

"How very … thoughtful of you," Bella replied, shaking her head as she closed the door to the bathroom. _And fucking weird,_ she continued in her head.

Bella wasn't used to being handled. It'd been her and Charlie for the past twenty odd years; with him, she'd always been the handler, not the handled. As she finished going to the bathroom, she looked around and saw that all of her toiletries had been laid out and a new dress hung on the door. Bella had never seen it before.

She opened the door not to thank Alice, but to politely tell her to back off. However Alice was standing in the doorway, nearly making Bella scream.

"You'll need to shower first and then get dressed," Alice said calmly. "We need to leave the hotel by 6:45."

"Alice, listen, I appreciate everything, but really … this is too much. Don't you think you're overstepping the boundaries just a bit here?"

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean," Alice said in the same voice. "I'm simply following my instructions. Besides, I like you, Bella. I want you to do well when you meet Mr. Masen this evening."

"Mr. Masen?" Bella asked. "I only know the barest details about this trip. I'm afraid I don't know much about Ms. Mallory's team here."

"I can assure you that Mr. Masen, nor any of his team, are part of Ms. Mallory's team. This is Mr. Masen's show and if you impress him enough, he will allow you to participate. Ms. Mallory is only nominally involved at this point. Mr. Masen is grateful to her for bringing your expertise to his attention, but he will decide whether you will be of further use here."

"But I don't understand," Bella said.

"Of course you don't," Alice said with an ironic laugh, "but perhaps it will become clearer this evening."

Alice shooed her into the bathroom for a quick shower. As Bella wiped the steam away from the mirror, she looked at her reflection critically.

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall …who's the most naïve of them all?" she asked herself.

_Oh, that'd be you for sure_, she told herself as she began her makeup. _What in the hell have you gotten into this time, Bella Swan?_

* * *

_**A/N:**__ *cringes* So, technically this doesn't count as a new story. This is an old wit fit thread that I wrote back in September. It was a popular thread and one that I rudely left unfinished. I want to finish it now and I wanted to give it its own story in order to do so. This is an AU and it is modern, which is kind of virgin territory for me. If you are familiar with Elizabeth Kostova's book, _The Historian,_ you may recognize elements from that story in this. It is not, by any means, a _Twilight _retelling of _The Historian_, however it is inspired by that book. I do hope you enjoy this new story. I have about ten chapters written and am going through them. I hope to update, at least in the beginning, once or twice a week. And you know, reviews mean love. So, click it? ;) ~Jen _


	2. The Enigmatic Mr Masen

_I am trying  
Not to tell you  
But I want to  
I'm scared of what you'll say  
So I'm hiding what I'm feeling  
But I'm tired of  
Holding this inside my head  
_

_**Fallin' For You**, Colbie Caillat 2009_

_**Disclaimer:**__ Again, they aren't mine, but they sure do own me. SM owns all, even me._

_Much thanks to my beta team, DeJean Smith, swimom7 and SparklyBabs, for pre-reading. And thanks also to all of you. The response so far has been overwhelming. So glad you are enjoying. Now to meet the enigmatic Mr. Masen. ;)_

* * *

Bella heard Alice moving around in the hotel room as she slipped into the black silk dress. It fit perfectly, which both pleased and freaked her out. Alice was strange, and the fact that she both had a key to the room and knew her exact dress size made Bella nervous. _Who _does_ those things? And more importantly, why?_

As a document expert, Bella was used to being given access to rare books and asked her opinion on many diverse topics; however, being showered with fine fashion and handled by a personal assistant was not something to which she was accustomed. Bella stepped out of the bathroom carrying the elegant stilettos Alice had intended her to wear.

"Do the shoes not fit properly?" Alice asked, walking over to the large duffel bag she had brought with her. "I purchased the shoes in three sizes in order to ensure the proper fit."

"I haven't tried them on," Bella said quietly. "They're really not my style, and I have perfectly serviceable black heels in my suitcase."

"Those are Manolos."

Alice looked at her as though she ought to recognize the name, but Bella just shook her head.

"I'm sure they are fine shoes, but really I would prefer to wear my own."

Bella handed the shoes to Alice who stood with her mouth open. Bella's suitcase was still packed and closed, so Bella dragged it over to bed and quickly unzipped it. She found the shoes she was looking for. To her eye, they were equally elegant and had a much more reasonably sized heel. She sat on the edge of the bed and slipped the shoes on while Alice watched in confusion.

"I can't believe you turned down Manolos," she murmured.

"I'm sure if I knew why Manolos were special, I'd be able to understand your hang up," Bella said with a smile. "Look, I don't like being told what to wear or what to do. I'm wearing the dress because I didn't bring anything this fancy with me, but I don't need another pair of black shoes, and frankly, I'm not comfortable taking them. You'll have to forgive me. This isn't the way I'm used to doing business."

Alice looked as though she might be ready to argue, but quickly shut her mouth and smiled.

"Mr. Masen isn't going to know what to do with you." She smirked and giggled at her own private joke. "You'll be good for him; I can see that."

"Okay," Bella said slowly. "Well, if that's all, I guess I should be going. I'll ask the desk to call a cab."

"That's unnecessary. A car is waiting for you downstairs. Follow me."

Bella walked carefully out of the elevator. Despite the lower heels, she was still unused to walking in anything higher than her traditional clogs. She missed them. She smoothed out the short dress nervously as she walked. _Is it riding up? It feels like it's riding up. The damn thing is too short!_

"Right this way, Ms. Swan." Alice walked ahead of her, breezing through the crowded lobby and not taking any notice to the attention she and Bella were drawing. "The car will take you to _Le Petit Blanc_ where Mr. Masen will meet you."

"You won't be attending?" Bella asked.

"No." Alice gave a dainty snort and shook her head. "I don't rate a meeting with Mr. Masen tonight. Now the driver knows the way. Once you are there, just tell them you are Mr. Masen's guest and all will be arranged. Good luck, Bella."

"Erm … thank you, Alice."

The mystique surrounding this character by the name of Masen confused Bella. She'd only heard his name once or twice from Lauren while she worked for her. Perhaps he was a collector of some sort; surely he was not another specialist. Bella knew all too well that the bookish academics didn't make the kind of money that could cause people to act the way Alice acted every time she said the man's name. He must be quite powerful.

The car waiting for her was a Bentley. Even to her untrained eyes, the winged 'B' on the hood was a dead giveaway. It looked to be an antique with its fine silver frame and beautiful lines. A gentleman in blue livery stood beside the car, holding the door open for her.

"Ms. Swan," he said in a thick accent. "Good evening."

Bella slid into the back of the car, and he closed the door. She was shut off from the driver by the shaded partition, and she giggled to herself when she saw the fully loaded bar at her disposal. _How opulent_, she thought. As the unfamiliar buildings passed her by, a familiar coil of doubt crept into her stomach. She knew nothing about these people or why she was here. Charlie would have had a lot to say about the way they were throwing money around at her; he would have told her to be cautious. Deep down, she knew she ought to be put out at being shuffled around a strange country by people she didn't know. However, part of her found the entire trip dangerously exciting.

It was the romantic side of her. She preferred to think of it as an adventure full of intrigue, not a mistake wrought with uncertainty. For once, she didn't want to shy away from the adventure. She wanted to grasp it with both hands and see where it would lead her.

When Bella walked into the lobby of _La Petit Blanc_ she was overwhelmed again by the opulence of the place. Like her hotel, this place dripped understated elegance. As the hostess walked her through the main dining room, Bella counted the number of utensils beside the gold rimmed chargers on the tables. Grandma Swan once told Bella that she could tell how fancy a place was by the number of spoons on the table. This restaurant had no less than four at each place setting. Bella felt a moment of panic. _Whatever could all of those utensils be used for?_ She felt sure she was about to make a fool of herself in front of her potential employer.

The hostess walked through the entire restaurant before arriving at a door.

"Mr. Masen is waiting for you in his private room. May I take your wrap?"

"Umm … no. I'll keep it in case I get chilly."

The hostess stood and stared at Bella until she realized that the girl was waiting for her to go into the room. Bella turned the handle and entered the room. It was nothing like she expected.

Against the far wall was an enormous fireplace, crackling and filling the room with the most pleasant warmth. The table was set for two, but the china and utensils were far simpler than the rest of the restaurant. The room felt homey, as though it was designed to instill peace in those who dined there. Bella saw two doors on either side of the fireplace. The room was minimally decorated with sketches and hanging plants. Overall, the room gave Bella a sense of calm.

A man stood in the far corner of the room with his back toward Bella. He was powerfully built, though not bulky. As he turned, Bella saw his muscles ripple underneath the steel grey wool of his suit jacket. His hair was disheveled, but not messy, and it was the strangest color red she had ever seen. It combined gold, red, brown, and even blond, melding together into the most perfect shade of bronze. It _looked_ soft, and Bella was shocked to find her fingers itching at her side to touch it. Butterflies came to life in Bella's stomach, and she inwardly chastised herself for ogling her potential employer.

He turned around slowly, moving fluidly and effortlessly, and when she looked at his face, her entire mind went blank. He seemed to sense her reaction and smiled lazily, only lifting the corner of his mouth to reveal bright white teeth behind his pink lips. His face was almost jarring in its perfection, smooth porcelain skin, long amber eyelashes, and warm eyes that were nearly hypnotizing in their intensity. She felt herself becoming dizzy and realized that she wasn't breathing. She tried to be inconspicuous as she drew in a deep, ragged breath, but she could tell that Mr. Masen noticed.

"Ms. Swan," he said, his voice low and lightly accented. "May I call you Bella?"

_You can call me anything as long as you keep talking_, she thought, blushing. She couldn't believe the effect this man was having on her.

Mr. Masen snickered and began walking toward her. Bella's eyes opened wide when she realized why he was snickering. She had spoken. Out loud. Her hand went immediately to her mouth, and she closed her eyes in embarrassment.

"You may call me Edward," he said as he reached her, pinning her with his strangely colored eyes. "It is truly a _pleasure_ to meet you…Bella."

His eyes had rich golden irises that seemed to slowly trace over every curve of her body as he approached her. He was now staring pointedly at her in an expression of wry interest. She could almost read his thoughts. _What will the strange American girl say next?_

"It is an honor to meet you, Edward," she said, extending her hand to him, "though I confess I do not understand why I am here. I was led to believe Ms. Mallory had sent me here to work on her documents, but I find out that I will be working for you."

"With me," he whispered, taking her hand.

Bella gasped. His hand was ice cold, shockingly so, but his touch was white hot. Warmth shot through her hand, up her arm and all throughout her body.

"You will be working with me," he clarified, "if I deem you worthy. Ms. Mallory fancies herself a collector, an expert. She is useful only for her nearly limitless supply of money. She knows nothing about antique documents … as you yourself already know, I'm sure."

Bella couldn't speak as he held her hand and pinned her with his golden gaze. She wanted to respond to him, to stun him with her knowledge. But no words would come out of her open mouth. He slowly brought her hand to his lips. Bella could hear the moan escape her lips as his lips pressed against her skin. Her knees weakened as he brushed his tongue against the back of her hand. All rational thought had left her, and she simply wanted this man to keep touching her.

The spell was broken when he pulled away from her, the same lazy smile on his face. Bella was a bright shade of crimson as she thought over her actions in the past several minutes. Thus far, she had brazenly told him to "call her whatever he wanted" and had _moaned_ when he kissed her hand. _What __**was**__ this man?_

"Shall we sit down?" he said in his musical voice.

Bella simply nodded. He walked her over to the table, which she now noticed was set so that the chairs were close together. _Great. More opportunity to embarrass myself_, she thought. As he pulled out a chair for her, his hand brushed against her elbow as he helped her into the seat. Bella hissed in a breath and sat down, unconsciously bringing her hands to her face in embarrassment.

In an instant, Edward was sitting next to her, almost too fast to have walked. She looked at him startled.

"You seem ill at ease, Bella," he said, his voice purring and a strange smile playing at his lips. "Is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable?"

Bella opened and closed her mouth several times before beginning to giggle. Perhaps it was the transcontinental flight or the glut of sleep she had gotten this afternoon, but Bella felt tipsy. She nearly asked the man to touch her again to see what would happen. She shook her head.

"I am sorry, Mr. Masen," she said.

"Edward," he corrected.

"Edward—yes—I'm sorry. You see, I don't fly very often and this was a particularly bad flight. It seems I am not acting myself."

"There is no need to apologize, Bella," he replied. "I find you quite enchanting as you are."

She felt the ripple of electricity as his fingers brushed against her thigh. She wondered if it was simply an accident caused by the close proximity, but no. His cold fingers sat splayed against her thigh much longer than if it had been an accident. As he pulled them away, she squeezed her thighs together in an effort to quell the desire raging through her blood at the moment. Bella was certain that Edward knew what his touch was doing to her, but she couldn't decide what his motivations were. It was highly unlikely, but possible, that he was interested in her. More likely, Bella thought that he enjoyed playing with her, teasing her to see what strange reactions she might have.

Bella reached into her purse to pull out her reading glasses when Edward's quick hand stopped hers.

"Allow me to order for you?" he asked, gazing into her eyes.

"Oh! Of course," she stuttered, blushing again. "Thank you. I'm sure you know what is best here."

"Mmm, yes. I'd say that I do," he replied.

Out of one of the doors, a server appeared and walked over to the table. Without looking up at the waiter or looking at the menu, Edward began ordering.

"The lady will have the pan fried haddock fillet with baby peas and minted new potatoes. Also, a bottle of your _Bourgogne Blanc_."

"And for you, sir?"

"Nothing," he said.

"Very well."

The server was gone in an instant, and Bella was left staring at Edward.

"Nothing?" she asked.

He smiled and his eyes became lidded, almost dreamy. It seemed a strange reaction, but Bella still sighed at having him look at her in such a way.

"I'm on a … special diet," he said. "Have no fear, my dear. I ate well earlier."

He said something else, something low and too fast for Bella to understand. Had she the benefit of Edward's excellent hearing, she would have heard the man sitting next to her compliment her on the delicious bouquet of her blood.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ *gasp* Yes, yes. Edward is what you think he is. And Bella, being Bella, is crushing on him already. But don't expect this to follow the pattern of the Saga. This is an older E and B and things will probably not be as they seem at all times. It is a mystery after all. ;) Hope you continue to enjoy. And if you are, let me know? It truly makes my day. _


	3. Have Mercy

_I don't know what this is, but you got me good_

_Just like you knew you would_

_I don't know what you do but you do it well_

_I'm under your spell._

_**Mercy: **__Duffy, Steve Booker,2008_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own them; I just love them and play with them. No copying, please. =)_

_So much love and thanks to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs for beta-ing and pre-reading this story. Also, for loving this storyline enough to make me write more._

* * *

The flavors of the perfectly fried haddock melted into tiny flavor explosions in her mouth. Bella was in heaven. She couldn't quell the soft, happy noises that she made as she savored each bite and washed it down with the expensive wine.

All the while, Edward watched her with a burning intensity that both unnerved and excited her. He seemed genuinely interested.

She'd asked several times what he had in mind regarding the documents she was to examine, but he continually evaded her questions with inquiries of his own, none of which related to her field of study. Finally, she asked him outright whether he would be interviewing her that evening or later at the college. He smiled and covered her hand which was resting on the table.

"I've already made my decision, Bella," he said softly. "I think you will be essential to me."

Inwardly, she was thrilled that she would be guaranteed more time with him, but the expert in her was slightly disappointed at being denied the opportunity to dazzle him with her knowledge and expertise. She couldn't help wondering what made him say she would be essential. It seemed presumptive and juvenile to ask, as though she was seeking reassurance, but she wanted to know.

He continued to study her as she ate, much like a scientist might study a new specimen, seeming to analyze the way she balanced the food on her fork. Then his light golden eyes would darken as she brought the fork to her lips. She saw him on more than one occasion dart his tongue out and lick his lips. The move made her freeze, staring at the dark pink tip of his tongue and wondering what it would feel like on her own lips. She also felt uncomfortable eating in front of him while he ate nothing. At one point in the meal, she even went so far as to offer him some of her fish.

"Please," she said, "let me share some of this with you. It's far too much for me."

His eyes smoldered, taking her breath away. _Damn_, she thought. _I want him_. It was unlike her to be so into someone she barely knew, but this man seemed to combine all of the essential qualities she looked for in a man.

"It is enough to watch you enjoy it," he said, his voice hoarse.

She continued on in silence, still uncomfortable, but thoroughly enjoying the meal. When it was finished and after the server came to clear her plates, she felt Edward's hand again on her thigh. It was unnatural how cold his touch was, and how hot it made her. Literally, the skin beneath his fingers felt as though it was branded by his touch. She closed her eyes for a moment, savoring the feel of him caressing her and sending up a silent prayer that this wouldn't be the last time. The look in his eyes when she opened hers, the hunger that she saw there, had made her heart skip a beat. She wanted him to keep looking at her, to touch her again, to … do anything that kept him close to her.

"Will you join me for a stroll under the stars, Bella?" he asked, his light accent tickling her ears.

"Of course," she replied.

Edward rose from his seat, retrieved her wrap from the hook, and walked over to her. She stood and wobbled on her heels, the combination of the unfamiliar height and the wine making her unsteady on her feet. His arms were around her in an instant, his body pressing against hers. She was immediately annoyed by the wrap that was between them, wanting to feel only him behind her. Still, she felt the magnetism of his body, the way she seemed to be drawn to him. She fancied that he was equally as drawn to her. Her unsteadiness worked in her favor as she fell back against him.

At first, she was shocked by the hard planes of his body. His chest seemed wrapped in well-defined muscle. As she leaned against him, feeling the push of his erection against the small of her back, the thrill of his attraction ran through her. He _wanted _her, the way she wanted him. As she leaned against him, allowing him to press against her, she felt more comfortable with her own desire. She felt powerful. She could flirt with him and possibly, she could win him.

"Perhaps I ought to hold on to you," he said, his lips inches from her ear so that his breath tickled the lobe. "I wouldn't want you to fall."

"Yes," Bella gasped, her voice as unstable as her legs. "Perhaps that would be best."

Edward came around to her side, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist. She leaned into him naturally, as though she belonged tucked beneath his arm. He pulled her even closer, as though he wanted every inch of their bodies touching. She couldn't have agreed with that craving more.

Once they were outside and the night air hit her face, Bella regained some semblance of self control. She fidgeted as they walked down a stone path towards a manmade pond. They were the only ones walking in the park, and she began to wonder what he was thinking.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asked, his fingers playing gently at Bella's side.

She giggled.

"What?" he asked, a smile playing on his lips. "Tell me what's making you laugh."

"I was just wondering what _you_ were thinking," she admitted. "Honestly, this entire night, though wonderful, has me baffled. It feels almost like a …." Bella stopped herself, covering her mouth. "Never mind."

"Like a … what, Bella?" he asked.

Edward stepped around in front of her and pulled her hands away from her face. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked into his strange, golden eyes.

"It feels like a date," she whispered, unable to censor herself when he looked at her in that way.

He continued to stare at her, and she felt a moment of doubt. She had imagined the attraction. He wasn't aroused by her, it was a coincidence; nothing more. He didn't feel the magnetism; the burning heat that his touch caused in her had never reached him. It was all just a fantasy, amplified by the wine and her imagination. And it was about to end.

Suddenly, she felt Edward's icy fingers on her skin, tracing slowly up her neck until they were resting under her hair. His other hand had found her waist again, and he pulled her toward him. He didn't have to work hard; she was already moving closer to him, desperate to close the distance between them.

"Would you like it to be a date?" he murmured, his lips brushing against her temple.

Bella could almost taste the intoxicating scent that she recognized as all Edward as his breath fanned across her face. Again, she found herself unable to form words. Instead, she nodded numbly, lifting her face up to look at him and praying that he would close the gap between them and kiss her. She didn't think she could control herself much longer.

"Me too," he murmured.

His lips brushed gently against her cheek as he bent down toward her. The instant his lips touched hers, she wound her fingers in his hair and crushed her body against his. His mouth moved slowly, softly at first, but as her hands grew more urgent in his hair, his mouth became greedier. Bella opened her mouth to taste him, darting her tongue out to feel the silky smooth steel of his lips. Edward groaned as her tongue continued to beg entrance to his mouth. When his tongue met hers, the combination of his icy cool temperature and the unbridled heat his touch inspired, nearly brought Bella to her knees.

Edward held her to him, never letting her fall. And she drank him in, pulling his tongue into her mouth and pressing her mouth to his. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she realized she must appear desperate. She also knew that she was. She was completely desperate for this man. His tongue was cool against hers and left her with a tingling sensation on her lips. She wanted more.

When he pulled away, feathering kisses over her face, Bella was left panting, raking her fingers against his chest trying to bring him closer and mumbling incoherently.

"Shh," he murmured. "Just breathe, Bella."

She gasped as he brushed his lips against her earlobe.

"But … I want … you have no idea …" she stammered, unable to string together coherent sentences.

"Yes," he whispered, "I do. And I want you as well … but not tonight."

She whimpered, actually whimpered, when he told her no. She couldn't imagine how she could walk away from him. He trailed his mouth down the line of her jaw and found her lips again. All of her disappointment melted as he kissed her more deeply, more passionately, than he had before. He wanted her. She could feel it in the way his mouth claimed her, the way his hands owned her, and the way his body responded to her touch.

"You must think me an American tramp," she whispered when he pulled away again. "Throwing myself at you, and only knowing you for a few hours."

"I assure you, the attraction is completely mutual," he said, kissing her hair. "Will you be content to stroll with me a while, perhaps putting your mind at ease by allowing me to get to know you better?"

She looked at him contemplatively, considering how to respond. Honestly, she wasn't content just to stroll. She wanted his mouth on hers again, his hands on her body, and … well, she simply wanted more. But, if walking and talking would make him stay, she would gladly do so all night. And she told him so without shame. He rewarded her with a radiant smile that warmed her almost as much as his touch had.

He wanted to know about her family, and was particularly interested in her mother. Bella felt uncomfortable talking about her past, especially when Edward seemed so reluctant to talk about his own.

"So your mother left when you were very young?" he asked, when she said that she and her father had been on their own for some time.

"Yeah … well, Renee wasn't a small town girl," Bella replied, sighing.

"But I don't understand. How could she leave you?"

"I guess … I don't know, Edward. Being a mother wasn't important to her. She never said."

Bella sniffed and looked down, her eyes prickling with unshed tears. She tried not to think about Renee much, not wanting to dwell on why she chose not to look back after the husband and daughter she had left behind. It just hurt too much to guess at what made her leave.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to bring up painful memories."

"It's okay," Bella said, squeezing his hand gently. "Not really painful, just difficult to justify. It's easier to think that she left the town than to think that she left me."

Edward swirled his thumb on her palm, making her close her eyes in satisfaction. His touch was both calming and exciting at the same time. The desire was still there, pulsing beneath the surface, but as they walked and talked, Bella began to see that there was more to Edward's attraction than physically wanting her.

"This is nice," she said after they had walked in silence for several moments.

"I hope you aren't terribly disappointed," he quipped, leaning over and surprising her with a kiss on her neck. His lips brushed the skin just under her jaw making her shiver and lean into him. She recovered quickly and shook her head.

"I – I'm not proud to admit it, but I would have accepted your attraction if it was purely physical. However, it makes me happy beyond measure to think that there might be more to your interest."

Edward was quiet for some time before responding. Bella worried again that she'd let her mouth get away from her, reading too much into his polite conversation.

"You intrigue me, Bella Swan," he said, stopping and turning toward her.

He lifted her hand up to his face and ran his nose along her skin. Bella gasped as his lips pressed against her knuckles and his tongue grazed her oversensitive flesh.

"I consider myself quite the – connoisseur – of human nature and behavior. I'm not often surprised, but you … you are full of surprises. Tell me, what do you find intriguing about me?"

Bella froze. _Telling him he's really fucking hot would be a bad idea, Bella_, she reminded herself. He looked down at her, his eyes wide and waiting for an answer. The right answer. And Bella wished to give it to him.

"At first, it was a physical reaction," she said quietly, looking down. "I can't explain why, but I feel a pull to be near you. I don't understand it, and I would be lying to you if I said I was completely comfortable about it. This," she gestured between the two of them, "is not like me."

She looked up at him, trying to read in his eyes whether her answer pleased him or not. He framed her face with his hands, his thumbs resting lightly below her eyes. He smiled before leaning his forehead against hers.

"I don't want you to think that this," he paused, pressing his lips to hers, "is normal for me. I feel the same pull you do … and it is just as surprising as everything else this evening has been."

Bella nodded and allowed Edward to gather her to his chest. Again, she noticed the hard lines and the chill that seemed to linger over his entire body, but she was not uncomfortable. In fact, she felt safe and warm. She snuggled closer to him, breathing in his strange scent. It didn't smell heavy like cologne usually did. It was light and fresh and totally Edward. As he stroked her hair gently, she felt her eyes growing heavy. She stifled a yawn, and Edward chuckled.

"I've kept you out far too late," he said. "Allow me to take you back to your hotel?"

Bella nodded and suppressed the desire to ask him to join her. Somehow, she knew that it would ruin the evening. He walked over to the waiting car and slid into the back of the Bentley with her. The driver shut the door behind them and started up the car. Edward put his arm around her as soon as the door was closed, and she leaned happily against him. Her body was tired, despite the amount of sleep she had gotten during the day, and she relaxed immediately in Edward's embrace. Part of her was still confused by how easily she trusted this near stranger, but she silenced the worry and enjoyed being close to him for the short ride.

* * *

"Hey, Dad," Bella said into the phone. "Hope you don't mind me calling you at work…"

"Course not, Bells," he said. "It's gotta be, what? Middle of the night for you?"

"Nah … only ten thirty. We're eight hours ahead of you. How's Jake?"

"Dumb dog," Charlie said, but Bella could hear his smile. "He's pining for you. I had to bring him to work with me. Good thing it's all quiet around here."

"Ah … my boy is a police dog after all," Bella said laughing.

"That dumb mutt would never make it on the force."

Bella could hear him rubbing the dog's head, and it made her feel the slightest pang of homesickness.

"So how's it going? You met any of your … colleagues?"

Bella rolled her eyes at the way he said it. She knew he was still upset with her for doing something he considered risky. The extra time to mull over everything had probably made it worse.

"I've met the head of the project I'll be working on, a Mr. Masen. We had dinner tonight, and he was a very charming man."

"Dinner? With your boss? That sounds a little strange to _me_, Bells."

"It was a business dinner, Dad. Really, it was … nothing."

She tried to hide the smile on her lips as she thought of Edward and the very non-businesslike kiss he'd given her as they parted ways in the lobby.

"Don't go falling for those European types. They're different and … I don't want you getting hurt."

"I'll be fine, Dad. But thanks."

"I worry about you, Bells," he said softly. "You got a good heart, but you're too trusting sometimes. Just … be careful."

"I will. I need to get to sleep … have an early day tomorrow."

"Okay. Call me when you can."

"Sure. Love you, Dad."

"You bet."

The line was dead before she hung up the phone, and she smiled. Charlie's "you bet" had become as special to her as any other person's "I love you."

She opened the window to allow a cool breeze into the stuffy room. She was more tired than she'd thought she would be. Slipping out of the robe and draping it over the chair, she slid between the cool, crisp sheets naked. _Heaven_.

"I should do this more often," she murmured to herself, wrapping the fresh covers around her body.

As she lay cocooned in the cool fabric, she couldn't help remembering the way Edward's arms felt around her. She shook her head.

"Down girl," she said and sighed into the pillow.

If she was lucky, Edward would stay at the University with her the entire next day. And the next and the one after that …. No, she wasn't exactly keeping her promise to Charlie about being careful and going slow. But with a man like Edward Masen, who could really blame her?

* * *

_**A/N**__: I realize that in canon, Bella knows what Edward is before he ever kisses her. In my head, I always thought it should be different and so in this story, it is. First of all, both of them are physically older (in their 20s). We don't yet know how "old" Edward is, but clearly this Edward is much more sure of himself than canon Edward. That's a good thing, right? ;) The response to this story has completely floored me. Thank you all so much for leaving me your thoughts and guesses about the different aspects of the story. It means so much to me to see what you are thinking and where you see everything going! Keep those guesses coming! Also, I'm trying to settle into a posting routine. It will likely be Mondays and Thursdays from here on out. :D ~Jen_


	4. That's Dr Swan to You

_It's only half past the point of oblivion_

_The hourglass on the table, the walk before the run_

_The breath before the kiss and the fear before the flames_

_Have you ever felt this way?_

_**Glitter in the Air**__, Pink 2008_

_**Disclaimer**__: I do not own Twilight, or Edward and Bella. Just this storyline._

_Much love and thanks to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs for beta-ing and pre-reading this story._

* * *

Bella woke the next morning with the muted rays of the sun streaming over her and the last trappings of her dream still lingering in her subconscious. Edward Masen had visited her dreams, and she closed her eyes tight in the encroaching daylight, holding on to what remained of him in her mind.

Too soon the softness of her dream faded. She sighed and opened her eyes, stretching under the covers. Her mouth felt like it was full of cotton, a side effect of the wine she'd had the night before. She smiled, touching her lips and remembering the feel of Edward on her mouth. Bella wondered how she would be able to focus during the day if he was by her side. Surely it would be unprofessional to jump her boss's bones in the clean room of Oxford's library.

She giggled and threw the covers off. After rummaging through her bag for a pair of soft grey dress slacks and her red sweater, she hurried to the bathroom to get ready for the day. She was eager to get down to the lobby in the hopes that Edward would be there waiting for her. After rushing through her morning routine, she darted around her hotel room, gathering what she would need for the day.

Bella tucked the slim case containing Ms. Mallory's documents under her arm and walked over to the window, intending to pull it closed and lock it. She paused in front of the window, perplexed when she saw that it was already closed. _Did I get cold during the night and close it?_ She shook her head at her internal thoughts. She might talk during her sleep, but she didn't sleep walk. Surely she would remember getting up in the middle of the night to close the window, but she didn't. She remembered her decision to leave it open, wanting the cool night breeze to drift over her in the night. _Then how in the hell did it get closed, Bella?_

She had no answer. She frowned at the window as though it ought to provide her with some clues and then shook her head. There was a small lock on the window, and she reached out and fastened it. She looked quickly at her watch and turned away from the window. It seemed there were no good answers, and she was running late. Grabbing her lab coat that hung in the closet, she hurried out the door.

Edward was waiting for her in the lobby and the sight of him leaning casually against one of the marble pillars, watching the elevators intently, nearly stole Bella's breath. His face lit with a smile when the doors to the car opened and Bella stepped out. _No_, she told herself, smiling at him, _he wasn't completely a dream._ He walked over to meet her, and she tried to remain focused on placing one foot in front of the other. It seemed that Edward Masen was rather bad for Bella's coordination, whether or not she was wearing heels.

"Bella," he murmured, the softness of his light British accent making her name sound sweet and different. "You look lovely this morning."

Edward was wearing light colored jeans and a green pullover. Bella suddenly felt entirely overdressed. She was about to ask him for a moment to change when he walked up to her, took her elbows in his hands, and placed a soft kiss on her temple. She closed her eyes and focused on the way his lips felt against her skin, the cool touch and the hot rush of emotion that ran through her.

_Damn_, she thought. _I will never get tired of that_.

"Good morning, Edward," she said, her voice little more than a sigh. "I trust you slept well."

He chuckled lightly and pulled away from her.

"Oh, I had a very relaxing evening," he said, coming around to her side. "Have you eaten yet?"

"I don't usually eat breakfast," she answered. "Though I'd love some coffee."

"We can stop on the way to the university library. Do you mind walking?"

"Perfect," she said excitedly. "I haven't really seen the city yet."

They talked more as they walked, Edward pointing out buildings and statues along the way which delighted Bella. His knowledge of the area and its history astounded her. He brought the whole scene to life for her, painting pictures of the past that made Bella feel like she could almost see it.

"You must have read voraciously about this area!" she exclaimed as he told her about the monk's cottages dotting the landscape of Worcester College. "I can almost see the things you're talking about."

He slipped his arm around her waist and smiled, looking across the grassy expanse of the courtyard.

"Yes … well, history has a tendency to – come alive – here in England. There's just so much of it around."

His voice was wistful, as though he was remembering something from long ago, but Bella decided not to press him on his memories. She hoped that he would share them with her when he was ready.

"That's true," she said. "It's something I've always missed living in the US. We have so much history, but it's all so _new_ compared to what you can find in Europe and the surrounding areas. I love walking down these streets and seeing buildings from the Middle Ages right next to modern office complexes. It's so fascinating."

He smiled as she spoke, and she blushed at having gushed about the history. Truly this was one of the things that had excited her so much about the trip; seeing history on a daily basis was like a salve for her soul.

"I'm sorry to go on so," she said more quietly. "But it's always been a dream of mine to live among this kind of history."

"Well … perhaps someday you will," he said, so softly that Bella barely heard him.

His words sent a prickle of desire and hope through her. She wondered if he was hoping for more time with her, as she had been eager for more time with him. She sipped her coffee nervously, trying not to think too much about the future. With Edward, she thought that staying in the present was best; she had no idea how long she had before she would be back in the states. They walked on, past the rest of Worcester College and onto the grounds of Oxford University.

The manuscripts that Edward wanted Bella to examine that day were housed in the Bodleian Library near Radcliffe Camera. They took the long way through the campus, winding through tree-lined drives and past buildings that looked to Bella as though they might have been centuries old. They were breathtaking, and Edward had to tug her hand gently on many occasions to keep her moving.

When they entered the library, the quiet surrounded them. Bella observed the way the students and faculty moved around the stacks, plucking out research materials and descending to their study tables or quiet rooms to digest the information. She sighed, feeling at home. _This_ was her domain.

Edward led her to the back of the library where they climbed two flights of stairs. At the top of the second flight, they came to the steel door that marked the entrance to the clean room. Bella stifled a small smile, finally feeling at ease. In that room, she would be at last on equal footing with Edward, and it gave her an added boost of confidence.

Bella shrugged into her lab coat, straightening the collar and smoothing the lapels. She knew from experience that the white coat with the embroidered _Dr. Isabella Swan_ stitched on the front would give her a leg up with any of the interns that might be in the clean room. Document verification, like any specialty, could be a snobbish field. A little added credibility couldn't hurt her in a new building. They washed hands, and Edward donned a lab coat that hung on the wall as they entered the clean room itself.

Three interns, two men and one woman, were within the room, and they all looked up at Bella and Edward's arrival. The two men glanced over the new arrivals and went back to work at their terminals. The woman, however, put down the manuscript she was working on and walked over to them, a smile on her face as she approached Edward. Bella frowned at the way she had left the document, haphazard on the table and without any covering. It was shoddy procedure and in her own library she wouldn't have stood for it.

"Mr. Masen," she said in a high, Yorkshire accent. "We weren't expecting you this early. I've barely begun getting the documents ready."

"Ms. Stanley," Edward said coolly. "I'd like you to meet Isabella Swan. She's come here at my behest to examine the documents. I trust you'll make her at home."

After watching her walk through the lab and hearing the way she talked, Bella realized that her initial assessment of her as an intern was wrong. Jessica was older than she first appeared and seemed to be in charge of the lab. She had a predatory look in her eye as she assessed Bella, as though trying to stake her claim over the lab. Bella guessed that she was either a doctoral student employed by the college or a recent graduate. The same possessive look was in her eyes as she looked at Edward; it made Bella's skin crawl.

Her eyes traveled over Edward's face, and down the arm that was wrapped around Bella's waist. Her blue eyes seemed to narrow as she took in the familiarity with which Edward held Bella. Bella reached out her hand to her new colleague, reminding herself that she held no claim to Edward and should not feel threatened by the woman's interest. It was only natural for a man who looked like Edward to garner attention among the women he interacted with.

"Jessica," the woman said in a clipped tone. "_Ms_. Swan."

"Doctor," Bella replied coolly. "But you can call me Bella."

The woman frowned but took Bella's outstretched hand. With a last look over at Edward, Jessica turned and walked toward the table where she had been working before. With a light squeeze to Edward's hand, she followed behind Jessica, eager to get to work. Bella knew this was where she shined, and she was eager to get her hands on documents again.

Bella laid the case she had brought with her on the edge of the table and plucked a pair of white cotton gloves from the box. From where she stood, she could see that there were several manuscripts laid out on the large table. Bella cocked her head to the side, surprised to see that some of them appeared very similar to the ones that she brought from the states.

"These are the entirety of the Cullen family letters that we have access to," Jessica said. "You'll note that they span a time period of three hundred years and appear to be written in a mixture of Middle and Modern English."

"Tell me how you dated them?" Bella asked, her hand resting on the other Cullen letters that she had brought with them.

"Well, some of them were dated because of the antiquated language used in them. Where language didn't factor into it, we were able to date the ink quality and the paper variety."

"You know, of course, that ink quality can be faked … and that language isn't a valid dating technique."

Bella's voice was terse, authoritative, and Jessica recoiled from her short assessment.

"I don't know that I like your implications, _Dr._ Swan."

Bella looked up at her levelly.

"Jessica, I'm not in the practice of placating egos. If you'll excuse me, I have work to do."

Jessica babbled, but Bella ignored her. She had immediately disliked the woman based on the way she looked at Edward, but she would have looked past that in order to maintain a professional atmosphere. But the way the documents were being handled and the carelessness in dating were too much for Bella; she could not accept poor workmanship.

She stepped past Jessica, eager to get a look at the documents and see if they contained the same anomalies that the letters she brought from Ms. Mallory's collection contained. She heard Edward's soft voice in the background along with Jessica's high-pitched whine. Bella tuned them out.

There were three letters on the table, along with a wooden tray containing several more pieces of parchment. Bella carefully unzipped her case and pulled out the folder with her letters inside. Behind her, she heard the voices become quiet. She felt, rather than heard, Edward behind her. Even concentrating on her work, she could feel the pull of his body and the way her own seemed to react when he was near. She quashed the feelings within her and carefully began to remove the letters she had stored within. Knowing that Edward was watching her, she put on her glasses and began talking as she worked.

"There were seven documents that I brought with me from the States," she said, as she opened the container. "They span a time frame of approximately one hundred years, based upon the plant fibers used in the paper process and the degradation of the acids in the ink. I date them from 1750 to 1850, with the usual twenty year buffer for poor storage and handling in the early years."

"Were you able to determine anything about the writer?" one of the male technicians asked.

Bella looked up, surprised at the man's Southern accent. He was American. The two men she saw when they'd first entered the room were looking at her from across the table. The man who spoke, a young black man, was looking at her with rapt interest.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Swan," he said with a smile. "I'm Tyler Crowley, one of the grad students here at the University. I'm a huge fan and have read all of your work. Working on the Cullen papers has been a dream come true for me."

Bella smiled at him warmly.

"A pleasure to meet you, Tyler. No, unfortunately the signature was removed on all of the letters I've examined thus far. I've been anxious to look at your documents to see if there is anything further I can learn from them."

"Mike Newton, Dr. Swan," the other young man said, stepping forward.

Bella couldn't place his accent, but she knew he was a native Englishman. She could also tell he was younger than Tyler, greener and less used to being in the clean room. He fidgeted with his lab coat and played with the white gloves as though they still irritated his hands. Bella smiled at him and nodded for him to continue.

"I'm consulting on the papers from the history department … so, anything you need …."

His voice trailed off and he blushed. Bella stifled a laugh at the young man and nodded her head seriously.

"It's lovely to see that so many people are working on the documents," Bella said kindly. "I'm eager to see what these new examples can tell me."

Bella bent her head to her work, carefully removing the documents from their special plastic sleeves and laying them out on the table. Side by side, she matched her documents to the ones that the team had been working on before she arrived. She would need to do further tests, but the likelihood that they were related excited her. She was unsurprised to find the young American, Tyler, hovering nearby.

"Would you like to help?" she asked. "I assume you've handled documents before … I could use an extra set of hands."

"He's hasn't graduated yet," Jessica said quickly. "The grad students aren't allowed access to new documents until a senior staff member has catalogued them."

Her voice was smug, and she was looking at Bella with an air of superiority. Before Bella could argue with her, Edward stepped between the two women.

"Dr. Swan is the most senior member of the team now," he said smoothly, with his crooked smile. "If she asks for Mr. Crowley's help, then that is perfectly acceptable."

"But _I_ should …"

Edward cut her off with a warning look, before nodding at Tyler. The young man eagerly came around the table, picking up a set of magnifying glasses on the way. Bella was happy to have his enthusiasm to keep her company. It would be a long day of comparison, and his energy would help to keep her going.

* * *

Tyler Crowley had proved invaluable to Bella throughout the day, and she sang his praises to Edward on the way back to the hotel that night.

"Really, that boy should be asked to shoulder more responsibility in the library. His skills are impeccable, and he has a real knack for the science of everything."

Edward smiled and took her hand, making her sigh. She'd missed his touch throughout the day, though she hadn't realized it until his hand brushed hers.

"I hold very little sway over the running of the library's document storage and dating facilities," he said, shaking his head. "The documents _you _are examining are mine, or from my collection, and as such, I have the authority to say who may work on them and who may not, but as for bumping up his standing … well, that lies with the library officials and his professors."

"But surely you can put in a good word or two for him," Bella pressed.

She was concerned by the territorial manner in which Jessica Stanley prowled the room. She would curtail Tyler's access to rare documents and learning opportunities to make herself seem more important. Bella had worked with her type often and knew how much trouble people like her could cause to students.

"What are you worried about?" Edward pressed her.

"Ms. Stanley?" Bella said nervously. "She seemed to be bothered by my presence there, and my favoring of Tyler. I could see that she favors the Newton boy, although he has no real documentation experience to speak of. I think that, perhaps, she is trying to protect her role as the senior researcher in the library."

"Ms. Stanley is a difficult woman in many regards," he replied tersely. "She fancies herself central to this investigation, but as you yourself pointed out, she's made plenty of blunders."

Bella frowned and shook her head.

"Those were novice mistakes," she agreed. "How long has she been certified in the classification of documents?"

"I couldn't say, really. I've only just brought the letters here in the past month. I had to make do with what they've given me here in the way of staff. Until, of course, I brought in my own expert."

He squeezed her hand gently as they walked off of the campus and toward the hotel.

"It's really an honor that you've brought me over here. I just wish I could tell you more," Bella said.

"But you've already made up so much ground," he insisted. "In just one day, we have ascertained more accurate dates for the letters, and know that some of them are even older than we first thought. That's progress enough for one day. We have plenty more time to explore these letters."

"I'm impatient for results," she admitted with a smile. "It's one of my greatest faults. When I'm on a project, I can be rather singular in my focus on getting the answers that I need. I'm looking forward to returning tomorrow so that I can begin examining the texts themselves."

"I'm counting on that focus, _Dr_. Swan," he whispered, leaning down toward her ear.

Bella gasped at the nearness of him and shivered as he brushed his lips against her temple. Her heart rate sped as he lingered close to her, breathing her in.

"I have missed you," he murmured, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close.

Bella sighed at the contact, relaxing into his embrace almost instantly.

"You have?" she asked, pleased that he said so.

"Of course," he said, running his hand up her back and pushing a lock of hair behind her ear. "Did you think it was easy for me to watch you work and not touch you?"

He had a devilish grin on his face that made Bella giggle and blush.

"I hadn't thought you were paying that much attention to me," she admitted. "You seemed … engrossed in conversation most of the afternoon."

She looked up at him, her eyebrows drawn in worry. She knew that what she said sounded jealous; she hadn't meant to come off in that way, but the fear of him favoring someone else had nagged at her throughout the day.

He brought his hand around and placed it on the side of her face. She leaned into his touch, the feel of his skin soothing her bruised ego.

"Do you know how beautiful you are when you are in your element?" he asked.

She smiled and looked down, but his finger caught her chin and lifted it up so that she was looking at him again.

"You have no idea the amount of control it took not to stake a claim to you in front of those simpering boys."

"Simpering … oh, oh!" Bella let out a loud guffaw, bending over and leaning against his chest. "You were jealous of the … of Tyler and … what was his name? Newtown?"

"Newton," he said tersely. "Yes. They were practically salivating over you."

"Oh, Edward. Really … that's priceless. And here I was worried you had some history with this Jessica woman."

He frowned deeply and shook his head.

"No," he said curtly. "She isn't my type."

Bella's laughter trickled down into giggles as she looked back up into his still slightly possessive eyes. It made her stomach flip-flop to see the jealousy there.

"Oh? And what is your type?" she asked, biting her lip.

She hoped that it didn't appear forward, or worse, desperate. But she wanted to know.

"You," he said simply. "You are my type, Bella."

He bent down and kissed her, surprising her with his intensity. She gasped, but leaned into the kiss, greedy for his lips after waiting so long to feel them again. He left her breathless, and leaned his forehead against hers.

"Don't ever doubt that," he murmured. "_You_ are who I am interested in."

His words left her as breathless as his kiss. He didn't give her time to respond, leading her toward a pub where he bought her a quick dinner of fish and chips. Though she hadn't seen him break for any meal during the day, he insisted he wasn't hungry. When he left her in the lobby of her hotel that night, she rode the elevator up to her room in a dreamy haze of happiness.

His words seemed to suggest that he was more than mildly interested in pursuing a relationship with her. As she got ready for bed, again opting to slip between the sheets naked with the window open, she hoped that his interest continued to grow because she knew that he had completely stolen her heart.

* * *

_**A/N**__: One of the dangers in drawing from pre-written material is that sometimes I get ahead of myself. Like today for instance. I submitted the teasers for chapter four to the Pic Tease and The Fictionators last week. After I did that, I decided to write in a new chapter between chapter three and the already existing chapter four. The pre-existing chapter 4 was great in the wit-fit thread, but for the longer story, I think this chapter is essential. Those of you who looked at the teasers might be a little confused. Just know that the teasers you saw today will appear in the next chapter. ;) Thanks for understanding. And thanks for reading as well! ~Jen_


	5. Nighttime Revelations

_Just you and me on this island of hope_

_A breath between us could be miles._

_Let me surround you_

_My sea to your shore_

_Let me be the calm you seek._

_Oh and every time I'm close to you_

_There's too much I can't say_

_And you just walk away._

_**I Love You**__, Sarah McLachlan 1997_

_**Disclaimer**__: These characters belong to SM. I just like to play with them and make them sexy. ;)_

_My betas are the best: DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. I heart them. =)_

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Edward walked away from the lobby of the Old Parsonage with an agitated mind. He was finding it difficult to concentrate, difficult to keep the voices at bay. He'd been a newborn the last time he'd been unable to fully control his gift, and that was centuries ago. Bella Swan had bewitched him.

After promising to pick her up personally in the morning to go back to the college, Edward walked to his apartment, wanting to burn off some of his excess excitement. He needed to rid himself from the looping thoughts playing in his head. He changed clothes quickly, and he was off, running through the countryside, trying to rid himself of thoughts of her.

The run wasn't helping.

Crystal clear memories of her eyes, the graceful curve of her neck, the way her lips tasted when he kissed her … all of these thoughts kept returning like a haunting fugue in his immortal mind. He passed within yards of a lilac bush, and the smell of its fragrant flowers made him stop dead in his tracks.

"Lilacs," he whispered, his lips curling into a smile. "She smells like lilacs."

He continued running, but no matter where he turned, something reminded him of her. The ripe berries reminded him of the way her lips looked puckered in the moonlight, reaching up to his. The babble of brook playing over rocks less than a mile away reminded him of her carefree laugh. He stopped abruptly beside a tree, pausing to the test the air. There were deer not far away, but he wanted more challenging game that evening.

_There_. He smelled a female bobcat in the distance. She was in heat, her scent heavy and musky. Edward smiled to himself, thinking it appropriate to the tenor of his evening that he pursue an animal looking for a mate.

As he ran silently through the night, he thought about the possibility that he had finally found her. His … mate. The word grated on him, but he knew that for his kind it fit. Once one found their mate, there was no other. But Bella was still human. He couldn't expect her to be bound by such immutable bonds.

Certainly she had been attracted to him; however, most women were attracted to him. It was an effect of the lures, not anything permanent or lasting. They wanted his body, nothing more. But Bella seemed different.

She had fascinated Edward from the moment she walked into the restaurant and her scent swirled around him. Nothing about her was ordinary. Her blood called to him, perhaps more than most if he was being honest with himself. Over four hundred years of denying his thirst for human blood helped him move past that temptation quickly. There was something more about her.

Her beauty, naturally, tempted him, but it was the way his body was drawn to hers that truly fascinated him. Never before had he felt so compelled to touch a human. Despite his better judgment, he gave into the temptation, and her reaction was exquisite. Instead of being repulsed by the chill of his body, it excited her. Edward felt her blush, heard her heart race, and tasted her arousal in the air. When she sought out contact again, he was certain that _he_ was causing her reactions. It emboldened him, and he continued to find excuses to carress her throughout the night, each time increasingly pleased with the way she reacted to him.

The scent of the cat was stronger, and Edward knew he was within feet of her. He jumped onto the branch of a nearby tree and scanned the forest looking for a sign of her. A brown tail twitching in the undergrowth gave away her location. She was hunting as well. Just as good; it would make the sport of catching her even better. He pounced when she was least prepared, taking her by surprise and making her scream. Even the feel of the blood on his tongue, however, was not enough to distract him from thoughts of Bella. When he had drained the animal and buried it, he looked at his watch.

_3:15 AM_

_Five hours._

_300 minutes._

"Damn!" he cried out loud.

He wanted to be with her that very instant, but he couldn't justify waking her up in the middle of the night. Going to her room again wasn't an option. When he'd passed under her window the night before, her scent wafting out of the open window, it had taken all of his control to only leap up and look in on her. If he went back again and spied her sleeping naked, he didn't think that he would have the willpower to resist going over to her bedside.

He walked more leisurely through the forest after his kill, savoring the night noises and trying to distract himself by testing his range. He was almost four miles away from the nearest town, but he could hear faint whispers of dreams coming to him from the sleeping townsfolk. It was a pleasant way to pass some time until he heard a familiar mind approaching him.

He waited for her against the tree, knowing she would be able to follow his scent through the forest. She had something to tell him, but she wasn't giving anything away. Instead, she was singing to him. He despised it when she blocked him.

"Hello, Alice," he called when she was only a few meters away.

_Hello, brother_, she said in her mind. _Running away from something?_

"You are exceptionally annoying when you've seen something; have I mentioned that?"

She was standing in front of him, a knowing smirk on her face.

"Possibly once or twice in the past few centuries," she said.

"I'm not running from anyone," he murmured, turning away from the jester's grin on her face that continued to get wider. "I'm occupying myself."

"I said something, not someone," she said triumphantly. "Go to her."

A picture of him climbing into Bella's room flashed into his mind. He was watching her sleep with her chestnut hair splayed on the pillow. His hand hovered next to her cheek as her lips were parted in dreaming. His groin tightened at the thought of being close to her again.

"I want to," he admitted. "But it would be foolish. What would she think?"

It was senseless to deny what he wanted to Alice; she'd know anyway. But it would be foolish to act on that impulse. His appearance in her locked hotel room might scare her badly enough to send her back to the States.

"She wouldn't care," Alice said, coming up behind him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Right … because you've seen it," he said ironically.

"I've seen what she means to you." Alice gently turned him around. "Her decision isn't made yet, and it's clouded by any number of human complications. But you must know that you mean a great deal to her already."

"I won't frighten her by sneaking into her room, Alice. That's something that stalkers do … and madmen. I'm neither."

_You visited her last night_, she thought.

"I didn't go in," he defended.

_You closed the window … what's more, she noticed_.

Edward's eyes flashed over to hers as he thought back over the night before. He stood in the window for only a few moments before pulling it closed without thinking. He had reasons for wanting to keep her window closed and her scent safely within the hotel, reasons he didn't like to think about.

"You love her, and you want to be with her," Alice insisted. "I'm telling you that if you go to her, things will be good. I guarantee it."

"Nothing like the guarantee of a psychic," Edward teased.

She laughed and cuffed him gently on the shoulder.

"You're pining for her," Alice said, shaking her head. "Go ease your worry and see that she is missing you as well."

Edward had no more fight left in him. Within minutes, he was back outside her hotel, sniffing the air as he began to pick up her scent. He needed to be careful. Dawn was far away, but at the hotel, there were likely to be some people awake. Humans could be watching him. The thoughts surrounding him had the soft edges of dreams, all except for the desk concierge who was engrossed in a sitcom. Edward was safe.

Bella's scent wafted out to him and the knowledge that she was just inside, sleeping, pulled him to her. Taking a quick look around and determining that the coast was clear, he leapt silently up to the second floor window and pulled himself inside. He landed without a sound, only inches from her bed.

_Fuck. She's naked again_.

The sheet was tangled around her body, covering her breasts and gathered between her legs. He sighed, sinking into the chair where Alice had sat earlier in the day.

Bella was twisting in the bed and the cotten sheet slipped off of her right breast, exposing the taut pink nipple to the air. Edward listened to her breathing, her rapid heart rate, and guessed what kind of dream she was having. He only wished he could see it, to see if he was in it.

Her hand opened and closed around the sheet gathered at her waist as if she was reaching for something. _What do you want, Bella?_ he thought. _Tell me, and I'll give it to you._

"Mmm," she moaned in her sleep.

It was the most erotic sound he'd ever heard. Without thinking, he got up and moved closer to the bed, closer to the sound of her. He stood beside her, transfixed as she continued to dream. She arched her back, moving closer to where Edward stood. Her hand flexed as if beckoning him closer, and she pulled her bottom lip into her mouth, biting the soft flesh hard enough to whiten the skin.

Edward hissed involuntarily at the sight of her skin pinned between her perfect teeth. He brought his knuckle to his lips and bit down gently, wanting something between his teeth. Her breath was coming faster, and he wondered if she was waking up.

"Ed-" she whispered.

Edward froze, statue-like, at the side of her bed. Her heart rate was slightly accelerated, but still seemed within the range of a sleeping human. Her breathing was ragged, hitching now, but her eyes were still closed.

"Edward …" Her voice was a moan, and it reverberated through his body.

He was kneeling at the side of bed, his nose inches from her outstretched hand, just waiting to hear what she might say next. _She said my name_, he thought. _She's dreaming of me._ He was aching for her, itching for her to open her eyes and see him there. He wanted permission to touch her again.

"Want…"

"Yes, Bella," he murmured, surprising himself.

He wasn't intending to speak, but he guessed what she wanted. At this point, all she needed to do was ask. He was here. He was ready. And _God,_ he wanted her.

"Edward, please," she begged, clearly still dreaming.

But it was the last straw for Edward. With a low growl, he brought his lips to her fingertips, sucking gently at the pad of her index finger. She sighed in her sleep, and he kept his mouth on her finger, tasting her again on his tongue. She was sweet, ripe with the warmth of sleep and desire. He eased his mouth open and gently dragged the tip of his tongue down her finger to the soft flesh of her palm.

He kept his eyes on her, watching as her eyelids tightened and her nostrils flared. She continued to breathe deeply, and he let his eyes travel lower to her chest.

"Mmm," Bella whispered. "So good."

He closed his eyes, the sound of her voice like music in his ears. He was doing something right, something that she had been dreaming about.

"More," she gasped, as his tongue drifted to the center of her palm.

He swirled it there in a circle, watching as her free hand traveled up her body and over her breast. He watched as her fingers swirled around the peak and then pinched it, rolling it around harder than he would have expected. The growl in his chest became more of a purr as her hips bucked upwards, looking for some sort of friction. His own hips matched her movement, and his tongue continued to explore the flesh of her hand and down to her wrist.

_I need to stop_, he thought as he sucked gently on her arm, her skin like silk between his lips. She was dreaming; it was wrong for him to allow this to continue. And yet, she was writhing on the bed … for him. She was moaning … for him. She wanted … him. And in that instant he knew he would give up everything to be with her. She was worth any risk.

He let her go, a small, red mark on her flesh where he'd sucked on her skin. He couldn't resist running his nose and lips along her arm as he drank in her scent freely. Her arousal was heavy in the air and as he lifted his eyes up to look at her, he saw that her hand continued to palm her breast.

His body ached to lie down next to her, feel the length of her body stretched next to his and cradle her in his arms, but he refused to enter her bed without permission. Perhaps it was a fine line, considering what he had done to her arm, but for him, the line could not be crossed. He ran his fingertips up her arm, raising gooseflesh as his cool skin passed over hers. As she shivered, he saw her eyes move more quickly behind her lids. She was waking.

He moved back slightly so that he was not hovering over top of her when she opened her eyes. She sighed and reached down to pull the covers up over her. He hadn't realized he was leaning on the covers, and her eyes flashed open when she met resistance. When her eyes met his, he saw equal parts fear and arousal in them. He breathed in deeply, waiting for her to scream or lash out at him.

"How?" she asked, breathless. "Why are you here?"

"Shh," he whispered. "I'm sorry I scared you. I … shouldn't be here."

"Damn straight!" she said, her eyes fluttering and her breathing unsteady. "Why _are_ you here? And how?"

"I'm here because I couldn't stay away from you," he said honestly, intentionally skipping over her second question.

Bella's eyes darkened dramatically when he spoke, and she leaned toward him. He thought for a moment she had forgotten her other question, but he should have known her better. She was not so easily diverted.

"How?" she asked again.

"I'll explain everything … just tell me that you want me to stay."

She looked down at herself, her chest now completely exposed, and he was afraid she might pull the covers up. Instead, she lifted her eyes to his, now hooded and full of lust.

"I want you to stay," she said, her voice husky and low.

_Music to my ears._ Edward took off his shoes and slowly, for a vampire, eased himself into her bed. Their eyes remained locked as Edward traced his fingertips over her shoulder and down her arm. His clothes and the sheets, barriers between his body and hers, agitated him, but he contented himself to lie next to her, feeling her weight beside him.

"You are so beautiful," he murmured.

"You are really overdressed," Bella replied quietly, blushing as she spoke.

Edward smiled and continued to rub circles along Bella's skin. It felt like brushed satin under his fingertips, and he longed to run his hands over the rest of her.

"What?" he asked playfully. "This isn't how you pictured me in your dream?"

She blushed more furiously.

"My … dream?"

"You said my name."

He brought his fingers up to trace the lines of her cheek.

"Oh!" Bella exclaimed, pulling the covers up over her. "Oh … that's embarrassing."

"Don't," he said immediately, letting his hand drift down to the sheet she was holding. "Don't be embarrassed. Hearing my name on your lips was exquisite. Almost as exquisite as seeing you … like this."

Her hand dropped slowly, the covers moving aside, and she was lying bare before him again.

"Edward," she said softly.

A soft purr rose in his chest when she said his name. Her eyes dilated even further, and her breath hitched. She moved closer to him, and he coiled his hand around her neck.

"Bella, I want to be with you," Edward sighed.

"But …?" Bella asked looking at him. "Your voice said 'but.' What's the 'but'?"

"The 'but' is very complicated indeed."

"I think I can keep up," Bella responded, sitting up and letting the cover fall down. Her voice was clipped and bordering on angry. Edward could hear the harshness in her tone, the way her heart beat more quickly as she continued to speak. "Let me guess … you're married? You're a single dad? You're bi-curious? What is it, Edward? I've heard all of these and more before; what's your story?"

Edward was taken aback by her brusque tone. She'd been hurt before, abandoned by foolish men who didn't see her for what she was. And she thought his reluctance was because he didn't _want_ her. She couldn't have been more wrong.

"I assure you, you've never heard anything like _this_ before," he said with a soft chuckle and reached up to tangle his fingers in her hair. "Though I am sorry that you've had disappointment in your life before. Bi-curious? Really?"

"Yes," Bella said, the same short tone to her voice as she shook her hair free of his hand. "Don't distract me. What is your 'but,' Edward? Tell me now so I can move on before you break my heart, please."

Her voice cut him to the very core of his being. He could see her pulling away, trying not to feel anything for him. But for Edward, it was already too late. The thought that anything he had done had caused her this kind of hurt made his dead heart ache. He had no fear of repercussions from the immortal world for sharing his secret with her. The only thing he feared now was losing her. He began slowly.

"I've watched people sleep before and seen their dreams … I wished that I could see yours tonight."

Bella continued to look at him steadily, waiting. If it could, his heart would have beat out of his chest as he waited for her to reply.

"You've _seen_ their dreams?" she asked, her voice curious but still verging on anger. "What is that, some kind of metaphor?"

"No," he admitted. "I've seen their dreams."

Bella hesitated for a moment before reaching out her fingertips and touching his cheeks. Her eyes squinted as she leaned in closer to him, as though she were trying to see him more clearly. He guessed that she couldn't see him very clearly in the near darkness of the hotel room. To him, she seemed to glow.

"What are you?" she breathed.

The honesty of her question startled him, and he didn't know how to respond. _Do I tell her and let her run, screaming, away from me? That would be the noble thing to do …_

"What do you think I am?" he whispered.

Edward was lying along the edge of the bed, but Bella had inched closer to him. Her fingers drifted down to his chest, following the line of his collarbone and then down toward where his heart should have been beating.

"It's as if I can't quite wrap my mind around it," she whispered, moving even closer, her lips puffing her warm scent over his face. "When I dreamt of you, I almost had it … but then it was gone again, like … like my mind couldn't handle it. So, you can see people's dreams?"

"All thoughts, actually," he replied, shrugging his shoulders, "except yours."

"You're a mind reader." Her voice calm, but her eyes were wide.

"Among other things," he said. "As I said, my 'but' is complicated."

"Why can't you read my mind?" she asked.

"I don't know," he answered, shaking his head. "I haven't come across anyone whose mind wasn't open to me in … quite some time."

"I'm not going anywhere, Edward," she murmured. "I want to know your entire 'but.'"

The covers were still gathered around her waist, but her naked chest was now only inches from his body. He could feel the heat radiating from her as she leaned into him, and he could no longer resist the urge to feel her pressed against him.

As his arm wrapped around her and their chests touched, Edward heard Bella sigh in relief at the contact. He echoed the sound, his body finally relaxing after so many hours away from her. He hadn't realized how much he had been aching for her touch in their time apart, but the dull throb in his chest eased as she laid her head gently against his shoulder.

"Would you accept that telling you may take some time?" he asked her. "But I wish to stay with you until I can tell you?"

"As long as you stay with me, Edward," she sighed, running her fingers over his chest making his skin tingle with her heat, "you can take as long as you need."

He could already feel her body getting heavier as she drifted into sleep. He held her close, running his nose in her hair and kissing her forehead, listening to her breathing and feeling her heart beat against his body. Though technically nothing was right about the situation they were in, everything felt right to Edward as he held Bella's naked form against his body, finding the most peace he had ever experienced in his long existence in that bed.

"You will tell me how," she murmured as she settled more soundly against his body. "Someday…"

She sighed, and he felt her relax completely. He smiled and chuckled silently. She was more persistent than anyone he had ever encountered. As he listened to her fall deeper into sleep, he considered the possibility that her persistence was the key to keeping him with her. Perhaps he wouldn't need to tell her after all; perhaps … she would discover the truth on her own.

* * *

_**A/N**__: Early update this week because I'm updating ATJ tomorrow. ;) Well, 2 points to those of you who guessed that Edward was the one who closed her window. Yes, our boy has boundary issues. What do you think? Will Bella be as fine with this in the morning as she is waking up in a lust-filled, Edward haze in the middle of the night? Or might she need to set up some rules for him? We'll have to find out. Seriously, your reviews are the highlights of my online life. All of you have such amazing guesses about what is going on! It's so hard for me not to write back telling you if you guessed something correctly or not! LOL Keep those thoughts coming! ~Jen_


	6. By the Morning Light

_She says "wake up, it's no use pretending"__  
__I'll keep stealing, breathing her.__  
__Birds are leaving over autumn's ending__  
__One of us will die inside these arms__  
__Eyes wide open, naked as we came__  
__One will spread our ashes 'round the yard_

_**Naked as We Came, **__Iron and Wine, 2005_

_**Disclaimer:**__ Same deal … I own nothing save for my original plot. SM owns Edward *sobs*!_

_My thanks, once again, to my beta team, DeJean Smith, swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are fantastic for putting up with me. ;)_

_

* * *

_

Dim sunlight streamed through the window and warmed Bella, but she refused to open her eyes. She was worried that if she moved too quickly or let the man next to her know she was awake, he would get out of bed. She tried to remain motionless, to feign sleep just a little longer, but his graceful fingers moving on her back told her that he knew she was awake.

She lifted her head up, stretching as she did so, and looked into his eyes. He was smiling. Bed head, morning breath, sleep-creased skin … and he was still smiling at her. He had one arm tucked behind his head, and he was reclining against one of the pillows. His other arm was wrapped around her, and she was leaning against his chest. His powerfully built, rock hard, perfect chest.

"You stayed," she whispered, unable to keep from returning his smile.

"Did you think I would leave?"

"I thought maybe you were just a more vivid part of my dream."

She saw the way his eyes darkened in response to her words, and her body reacted to his display of desire. She leaned in to him and brushed a kiss on his lips before pulling back and covering her mouth.

"I'm not going anywhere," he murmured. "You can get up if you need to; I'll still be here when you get back."

"I thought you said you couldn't read my mind," she said warily.

_God, he's too beautiful for words_, she thought when he smiled wickedly at her. She found it incredibly erotic when he teased her this way, making her wait with bated breath as he considered her question. And while she believed him when he said he couldn't read her mind, she thought he knew quite well that she enjoyed his teasing.

"I can't," he said finally. "But I could sense your embarrassment. Given that you weren't even slightly hesitant about kissing me last night, I have to assume that your embarrassment this morning is due to you wanting to complete your morning routine."

"Umm … clever deduction," she said, shaking her head.

"I like having to figure you out," he murmured, running his fingers through a stray bit of hair at the side of her face. "You are a mystery; you can't know how rare that is for me."

Bella smiled and giggled. She had been worried that whatever stopped him from seeing into her mind would stop him from liking her. It pleased her to know that _that_ part of her was actually an asset in his eyes.

"I'll be right back," she said. "Don't … just, stay. Please."

_Awesome,_ she thought as she pulled away from him. _I sound like I'm talking to Jake_.

She extricated herself from the covers and got out of bed. She couldn't help but turn around to watch him as she walked across the room. He lay statue-like on the bed, only moving his golden eyes to follow her as she walked away from him. It was as if he was drinking her in, not wanting to miss a motion. She closed the door to the bathroom, leaned against it, and sunk down to the floor with a giddy smile plastered on her face.

He stayed. She hadn't meant to fall asleep, but lying against his cool body felt so amazingly right. She couldn't help but let her defenses down and slip back into dreamland. She thought back on the way he looked at her as she walked across the room, naked and tousled from sleep. He looked … hungry, anxious, and completely _into_ her. She remembered his words from the early morning: _I wish to stay with you_, he had said.

Despite her better judgment, she could feel herself falling for this strange man. And it scared her. She knew little more than his name and that he had an interest in antique documents. _Oh, and that he reads minds, don't forget that one, Isabella_, she thought, mocking herself in her own head. She added unnaturally cold to the list of his more – unique – qualities.

But no matter what was different about him, she couldn't deny the powerful magnetism he held over her. Or the way she felt when he held her, looked at her, or said her name. She'd never felt that way about anyone before, despite the long list of 'disappointments' as Edward had called them. No, this was something entirely different. And again, in spite of her better judgment, Bella knew that she was going to see this to some kind of conclusion.

"Edward," she called, opening the door a crack. "I'm going to catch a fast shower."

"By all means," he responded. "Bella?"

Her heart skipped a beat.

"Y-yes, Edward?" she responded, peeking her head further out of the door so that she could see him.

"I'll be right here," he said, pinning her again with his eyes.

Bella felt her knees becoming weak again. She debated how to handle this. Lord knew what she wanted. She wanted Edward to creep into the shower and surprise her. She'd _wanted_ the man from the moment she laid eyes on him; but something deep within her, perhaps the part of her that had been hurt so many times before, told her not to rush him. She felt certain that rushing this man could only lead to disaster.

_Right_, she thought. _Don't ask him to join you in the shower. That would be way more forward than, you know, sleeping next to him naked_. _This is so fucked up!_

She waffled back and forth over what to do for several minutes before opting to leave the door partially cracked, allowing him to make his own choice. She decided that was invitation enough.

Once inside the steamy shower, her muscles finally relaxing under the steady spray, she realized that she had a lot of soul searching to do. She'd just spent most of the night lying naked beside a total stranger who had shown up uninvited in her room without explanation. He'd said that he would explain, but with distance between them, Bella decided that she was more creeped out about him being there than she wanted to admit. This was only the start of her third day in England, and the second time an uninvited guest had shown up in her room.

_What was up with these people?_ She thought. _Maybe it's a European thing…_

Her rational, logical side told her it was most definitely not a European thing. Most of the other English people she'd met respected personal boundaries religiously. So it was something else. She chose to ignore the Alice issue and focus on Edward. With him, she wanted to believe that it was the magnetism that she felt for him. When she'd opened her eyes and seen him standing beside her bed, she'd felt only a moment's fear. More than any fear, even more than the desire she felt, there was relief.

It was the same way she felt when he'd slipped into her bed and finally cradled her to his chest. As though, in the hours they'd been apart, something integral to her well being had been taken away and had suddenly returned when he touched her. She'd heard Edward sigh in relief when he touched her again too.

She'd known him for less than two days; it was utterly absurd to think that she needed him that way or that he needed her. And yet, as the almost too hot water washed over her and she felt warm from head to toe, an ache began to rise in her chest. She wanted his cool fingers beneath her hair again, splayed on her skin and owning her in his gentle way. With every caress, he had seemed to claim her as his own, and she loved it. She enjoyed the feeling of belonging that he created in her, the feeling of belonging to him.

_That's crazy_, she thought, plunging her head under the water and letting it run in rivulets over her body.

Bella considered her greatest fear as she worked the shampoo through her hair. She'd had her heart broken so many times she'd lost count. It was always the same for her. She gave so much, totally devoted from the word go, and the men in her life never reciprocated that type of commitment. As many times as she promised herself and her friends that she would be more cautious, more prudent, she always fell the same way. Though never quite like this before.

Before it had always been a superficial devotion, and with the proper distance she was always able to admit that. She could already tell that there was nothing superficial about her feelings for Edward. He'd come into her life like a burst of color on a dark canvas, and he'd changed her. She knew that even with distance, he would stay with her. Already, she knew that she was in too deep. Unfortunately, there wasn't much she could do about it; the feelings were there. It was silly to try and deny them or push them away. She needed to find a way to deal with them in a way that wouldn't shatter her heart.

_Boundaries_, she thought. _We need boundaries_. Both of them would need to make concessions, she was sure of that, and it would be difficult for her to set limitations on him when her gut was telling her to pull him closer. Also, she needed more information. Perhaps not about his "but," but she at least needed more information about her role in the research. She'd been in England for nearly two days, and she knew no more than she had when she arrived. She was letting her emotions drive her too much.

_Dangerous_, she chided herself as she turned off the water. _And yet, so very easy_.

Edward hadn't joined her. Though she had done some much needed thinking, she couldn't help but be slightly disappointed. She stepped out of the shower and began toweling herself off, trying to push away the disappointment. _After all, he had seen me naked … isn't turnabout fair play?_

She giggled like a school-girl at the thought of a naked Edward Masen standing in her bathroom and then shivered. She'd like that quite a lot indeed. _Naked_, she thought.

"Shit!" she hissed.

"What's wrong?" Edward called from the other room.

She could hear him up and moving through the room. _There's no way he should have heard that_, she thought.

"It's … nothing," she called. "I just realized I, um, forgot to bring in my clothes."

Suddenly, she was embarrassed to be seen naked. It was irrational, but her soul searching had left her feeling exposed, defenseless. Being _actually_ naked on top of those feelings was almost too much. She held the towel around her body as the door moved. She gasped as Edward appeared in the doorway.

Something seemed different about his face. His eyes were no longer golden. Instead, the golden irises were nearly obliterated by his obsidian pupils. Bella stared at him with her mouth hanging open as he stood in the doorway.

"Your … eyes," she whispered, moving toward him with one hand held outstretched.

"What were you thinking about in the shower?" he asked, his voice a gentle growl.

Bella felt her stomach tighten in response to his powerful voice. The independent, forward-thinking woman in her was slightly ashamed at the way his commanding tone excited her. But like the way his possessive touch felt perfect to her, she couldn't deny that she was turned on by the sound of his voice.

"You," she admitted softly.

"You are breathtaking," he whispered, "but I will not look if it makes you uncomfortable. Or … I will leave."

She shook her head quickly and held her shoulders a bit straighter.

"No," she said quickly. "I'm fine. Besides, I've done some thinking, and we need to talk."

She tried to hide the blush that seemed to cover her entire body as she breezed past him and out of the bathroom. She felt the same pull when she neared him, the desire to turn toward him and fall into his arms. She willed herself to resist the urge, knowing that contact with him would only make it more difficult to talk coherently.

"What did you wish to discuss, Bella?"

Her name in his distinct accent rolled like music off of his tongue. It sounded beautiful to her ears and made her smile.

"Boundaries," she said with a smirk. "We need some."

She dropped the towel onto the bed and stood before him naked for a moment. He looked ready to pounce on her, and she lingered for a moment in his gaze before turning toward her suitcase to pick out clothes. She felt powerful knowing that she was the object of his desire. Powerful and secure.

"What sort of boundaries?" he asked.

His voice came from a different part of the room and when she turned around with her blue sweater in her hands, she saw he was sprawled across the bed, his head leaning on one of his hands. Suddenly, he had turned the tables again on her. She no longer felt powerful; instead, she felt the now familiar tug to be closer to him, touching him. Closing her eyes, she turned around again and sat on the edge of the bed, slipping on her undergarments.

"Last night," she said, her voice steadier than she thought it would be, "I won't deny that I was happy to see you. I was … but it was inappropriate, Edward. No matter how you managed to get in, you shouldn't have been here."

"You're right," he said softly.

She looked over her shoulder at him as she fought with her bra strap. His face was a mixture of desire and regret. She paused and smiled at him.

"Let me invite you in next time," she murmured. "I will, you know?"

His lips twitched in his familiar half-smile, and she turned back around, still struggling with the clasp. Bella gasped at the feeling of cold fingers brushing against the small of her back.

"Allow me to help you?" he asked, his voice so close to her ear that his breath made her neck prickle with desire.

She nodded and dropped her hands. His fingers worked slowly, deftly, on the clasp. Where his skin brushed against hers, bright sparks of electricity seemed to run down her spine. When the bra was fastened, he ran his finger up the left strap, straightening it. His hand moved to her still wet hair, gently lifting it off of her neck. He placed a soft kiss just below her hairline before pulling away. She shuddered, her hands clutching the covers tightly in fists. Her resolve to go slowly and set limitations was effectively shot.

"Was it okay that I kissed you?" he asked, a teasing note to his voice.

She took a shuddering breath that dissolved into a harsh laugh before turning around on the bed. He was lying on his side again, a cocky smirk on his face. She turned fully around, crossing her legs in front of her before smiling sweetly at him.

"You know damn well that it was more than okay, so don't play coy with me."

He spread his hands out in front of him, a look of mock innocence on his face.

"This is important to me, Edward," she said more seriously. "I'm trying to make sure that I don't get hurt here … and make sure I know where I stand. Can you understand that?"

His face became instantly serious, and his eyebrows knitted together in concern.

"Why would you think that you would get hurt?" he asked.

"I think …" Bella's voice faltered.

Could she say this without having him run out of the room screaming? Most men would bolt at the first mention of the "L" word, especially this soon after meeting. But Edward didn't strike her as being like "most men." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before continuing.

"I think I'm falling for you," she blurted out. "Like, in love with you. Which is crazy. I mean, totally fucking insane, right? I barely know you, and you just told me you read minds, so I shouldn't be feeling this way. But I do … and it scares the ever-loving shit out of me." She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. "Also, I don't normally cuss like that, but I have a terrible sailor's mouth when I'm nervous."

"I find it charming," he said with a smirk. "You should know I feel the same."

"Feel the same as in you think it's insane, or …"

"Feel as though I'm 'falling for you,' as you said. You should also know that I don't find that odd or crazy in the least."

Bella regarded him warily, her sweater forgotten in her lap.

"You're falling for me, or the _idea_ of me?"

Edward cocked his head to the side in thought and furrowed his brows again.

"I'm not sure I understand your meaning."

"You said yourself that I'm a mystery to you, something you don't often find. Are you in love with _me_ or the mystery I hold for you?"

He smiled slowly and closed his eyes before sitting upright and moving closer to her. Bella was afraid he might touch her which she knew would melt all of her resolve to hear his answer, but he did not. He matched her position on the bed, folding his hands in his lap.

"To me, the mystery is just a part of who you are. It does not define you any more than your hair color or shoe size. It is but another aspect of you that is attractive to me."

Bella sighed, but couldn't help the smile that came to her lips. She wanted to believe him, but she also wanted some sort of guarantee. She knew instinctively that there was too much at stake for her not to be cautious with her feelings.

"My feelings for you frighten me," she said, her voice thick with emotion. "When you held me last night, and again early this morning, I felt relief as though a part of me that had been missing was suddenly back in place. I've never felt anything like that before, and I'm afraid that if I give into that feeling, and you walk away … I might never be whole again."

She had closed her eyes as she spoke, unable to look him in the eye as she made such a bold declaration of her feelings. It was cowardly, perhaps, but she was afraid to see either fear or rejection in his face. When she opened her eyes, he was kneeling before her, his golden eyes bright with the smile that was on his face.

Edward raised his hands and held them around her face, barely touching her. She held her breath and couldn't tear her eyes away from his.

"Would you believe that I feel the same way?"

His voice held more sincerity that Bella had ever heard before in her life. His eyes, golden and glowing in the soft light of the room, seemed to plead with her to accept his words and the promise they held. As his hands closed around her face, gently pulling her up so that she was kneeling with him on the center of the bed, she smiled warmly at him and nodded.

"I think I can believe that," she whispered. "But …"

He raised an eyebrow at her and waited.

"But … it will be difficult for me. I'm, by nature, wary. I like guarantees."

"Then I shall endeavor to prove the truth of my words to you with my every action."

When he slipped his hand underneath her hair and leaned toward her, her lips were already parted and waiting for his. They both moaned as their lips met roughly, both eager to touch and taste again. Again, she was the aggressor, nearly attacking his mouth with hers, trying to gain entrance. She pressed herself against him when his cool tongue brushed against hers. She wanted to feel his body against hers; she wanted to feel his desire.

He trailed his fingers down her neck and placed his hand over her thrumming heart, pushing her gently backwards. She looked up at him, a question in her eyes.

"Truly, I would love to continue, but we are needed at the university this morning."

She saw the regret in his eyes at having to pull away from her, and it quelled her own disappointment. This wasn't an excuse; they had obligations. She leaned forward and kissed his lips gently before moving off of the bed to finish getting dressed.

"Usually I don't let men see me naked before the fifth or sixth date," she quipped as she pulled her sweater on.

He chuckled.

"I feel honored, I'm sure."

"You should."

She winked and smiled as she put on her jeans and sat on the bed to pull on socks.

"Blue is a lovely color for you," he said quietly.

"Thank you," she said. "It's my favorite color. Well, it used to be."

"Hmm," he murmured, coming around the bed and sitting beside her. "And what might your new favorite be?"

"Bronze," she whispered, running her fingers through his soft hair.

"Funny. My new favorite color is brown."

She giggled and shook her head. Edward leaned over and kissed her forehead.

"Perhaps we can grab some coffee on the way to the college again? If you don't mind walking, that is?"

"Sounds wonderful," Bella responded.

"While we walk, we can discuss our plans for the next several weeks," Edward said as they walked toward the door.

"Weeks?" Bella asked, both intrigued and a little confused.

"Yes. Weeks. There are volumes of documents I need your opinion on, and they are spread out across Europe. I hope you enjoy my company, Ms. Swan, because we will be doing a lot of traveling together."

He fixed her with a devilish grin before opening the door for her.

"I think it's quite clear that I like your company just fine," Bella said with a frown. "It's airplanes I can't stand …"

"Hmm," Edward murmured. "Perhaps we will find a way around that then."

* * *

As they walked out of the hotel hand in hand and the crisp morning air cleared Bella's head, she remembered some of the questions that she had for Edward about the documents.

"So," she said slowly, "how much _do_ you know about the documents I'm working on? Nothing … everything?"

He chuckled and kissed her hand gently before shaking his head.

"Why do you ask?"

"Why do you prefer to answer my questions with questions?"

He snorted.

"Touché," he countered. "I only asked because it seemed a strangely … leading question. I was curious why you thought I was holding out on you."

"When we talked about my findings last night, you didn't appear much surprised at my results though Ms. Stanley had given you different results before."

"I trust your research methods," he said immediately.

"I didn't ask whether you did," she insisted. "I asked why you weren't surprised. It was as if you already knew how old they were."

He paused and as she waited for his answer, her heart rate picked up seemingly without cause. Something in her felt anticipation at his silence. She wondered what gut instinct was causing that reaction and whether it should be trusted. Edward took a deep breath and Bella held hers, knowing that he was about to speak.

"Yes," he said softly. "I knew how old each of the documents was before either Ms. Stanley or you looked at them."

"But … why didn't you correct the mistakes? I don't understand."

Bella had stopped walking and was standing in the middle of the street looking at Edward for answers. He gently pulled her over to a nearby statue where they could sit for a moment.

"The papers that the Bode is studying were never meant for examination. However one of the fellows in the graduate department stumbled upon a few of the letters _not _in my possession and … well, one thing led to another, and they traced the rest to me. It was never my intention to have them examined, but once they were discovered, and I realized certain – benefits – that could be gained by their examination, I decided to go with it. It is why I've brought in the best."

He smiled radiantly at her and Bella felt her pulse quicken. She closed her eyes, knowing it was her only defense against his charms and backed minutely away from him.

"Let me be very clear, Edward," she said, opening her eyes and holding his gaze steadily. "I refuse to work in an environment where I can't trust the people I'm working with." She held up her hand when he opened his mouth to speak. "I'm not insinuating that you lied to me; you simply held back facts that you didn't deem necessary for me to know. I want _you_ to know that I am not at all comfortable with that practice. If you know something more about these documents, I need you to be upfront with me about them. I can't do my job any other way."

"Bella, I didn't mean to offend you," he said, a look of real apology in his eyes. "You must understand that I'm not – accustomed – to working with others."

Bella shook her head.

"It's over and done with. But I need to know that if I ask you something in the future, you will tell me truthfully what you know."

Bella could see the wheels churning in his mind as he weighed her in his golden gaze. She could feel the pull toward him, the magnetism that would be the undoing of her resolve if she gave into it. She sat still, her eyes not wavering from his as he regarded her.

"You remember last night when I said that my 'but' was complicated and might take some time to explain."

She nodded curtly, unsure what link the papers might have to his reservations about their relationship.

"There are things about these papers that I cannot tell you outright, things that it would be dangerous for me to reveal to you."

Bella rolled her eyes and shook her head, ready to call him on a line of bullshit when he touched a finger to her cheek so gently that she gasped. When she looked at him there was a look of genuine pleading in his eyes.

"I will not lie to you, Bella," he said sincerely. "If you guess at a secret, either mine or about the letters, I will tell you honestly whether you are right or wrong. But I will not _lead_ you to the answers. You will have to find the way on your own."

Edward's single finger on her cheek burned like a fire on her skin, setting her cheeks blazing with desire. She mused that she had become quite the wanton during her time in England, all without ever sleeping with the man outright. She shook away those thoughts and focused on what he said.

It was a challenge. He was laying a mystery at her feet and daring her to solve it. Something deep within her knew that if she unraveled this secret, she would unravel much more than just a few centuries old documents. She would unravel the mystery of Edward.

"I accept your terms, Mr. Masen," she said firmly, holding out her hand.

Edward took her hand slowly, and Bella noticed it was not without difficulty that he met her eyes as he shook her hand. Their conversation had made her all the more eager to examine the documents further.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ So … Bella didn't push him away completely, but she did set up a few boundaries. Smart move … but how long before she invites him back into her room, do you think? ;) I'm curious about your theories on the papers now. Edward seems to think there's something dangerous about telling Bella everything he knows, though clearly he doesn't know _everything._ Otherwise there wouldn't be any benefits to having them examined, right? I wonder what secrets they hold. And who wrote them. Mystery abounds. Happy Valentine's Day, my lovelies. Every review is like a tiny raspberry filled chocolate on my pillow; decadent and filled with love. Thank you for reading! ~Jen _


	7. In the Clean Room

_The stillness in your eyes convinces me that I_

_I don't know a thing_

_And I been around the world and I've_

_Tasted all the wines a half a billion times_

_Came sickened to your shores; you show me what this life is for_

_I wanna dance with you_

_I see a world where people live and die with grace_

_The karmic ocean dried up and leave no trace_

_I wanna dance with you_

_I see a sky full of the stars that change our minds_

_And lead us back to a world we would not face._

_**Dance with You**__, Live 1999_

**_Disclaimer: _**_SM owns Edward, Bella, and Twilight. I do not. If I did, I seriously wouldn't be rocking the four year old pair of jeans. js._

_Thanks and love to my betas DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are the bestest ever, and stop me from writing things like "bestest." ;)_

* * *

_If she was Aphrodite while she slept naked, she is Athena while she works_, Edward thought as he watched Bella intent on the papers in front of her. They were alone in the clean room for the moment, and Edward was enjoying the way her work captivated her. With her attention diverted, he was free to study her the way she examined his documents.

Her questions on the way into the library that morning were both troublesome and enlightening. Bella was no fool, and he shouldn't have pegged her as one to let small details slip. He wondered idly whether she would know by the end of the day that she had been sleeping next to a vampire the night before.

It was possible. The letters talked openly about vampires, though most of the researchers thus far had written such references off as mere old-world superstition. But not Bella … she wouldn't be fooled by the clever tricks employed by the writers to veil their theories. She would eventually see the reality in front of her, and it would lead her to further research. When that happened, she would guess. Edward had already promised her he would tell her if she guessed correctly, but he wondered whether he would have the courage to do so, knowing that she might run from him. He would have to find it within himself; he couldn't lie to her.

Lauren had told Edward that Bella's specialty was dating documents by reading the markers in ink, paper, and handwriting. Technically, he didn't need her to do that with these documents. As he had told her earlier, he knew the correct dates for the letters. After all, he had written some of them himself. But the exasperating American woman who thought of herself as an expert on the Cullen clan also said that Bella was often times annoyingly fanciful in her interpretations of history.

Edward was counting on that.

He wanted her to discover his secret herself. He wanted her to read between the lines of the letters, recognize the man who had written them, and then put the pieces of the puzzle together. He wanted her to see him for what he was and not run away. Because he wanted her to love him as he was … not only because his touch made her blood boil, but also because she couldn't live without him. Certainly, he could not live without her. It was a lot to ask of her having only known him for a few days. But he could feel the connection between them that Bella spoke of. He wanted to build upon it. His vast experience with people's thought processes told him that she would react better to his secret if she discovered it herself.

Now … he had to practice patience.

"Hand me that ruler," Bella commanded, holding out her hand and never looking up from the document.

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, moving quickly to her side and handing her the ruler.

The fact that she barely noticed his presence at her side enamored Edward more than anything. She was transfixed, intent, and totally fucking sexy. _Focus_, he thought. She was disarmingly attractive to him when she practiced her craft. Though he waited with bated breath for the moment when all of the pieces fit together, he adored watching her puzzle them together.

"See here," she said, aligning the clear straightedge across the bottom of paper to highlight where the signature had been torn off. "This is far too exact a cut for it to have been unintentional. Someone deliberately removed the signatures on these letters. It's the same as the letters that Ms. Mallory had in the States. Curious."

"Can you tell what tool was used?" he asked her, unable to hide the smile from his lips.

"Something more modern than the pen and ink combination used to write the letter, that's for sure," Bella said with a sigh. "Look here. The cut is clean, indicating that it was not torn. It also suggests the use of some type of shears or scissors which implemented on a central pivot point, likely much more modern than the document itself, since scissors weren't capable of clean cuts such as these until the mid 1700s. Before that, scissors would leave minuscule jagged edges in the paper because of misuse or rust. This edge is clean and straight."

"Fascinating," Edward said, continuing to smile. "Tell me more."

Bella looked over the top of her glasses at him and smiled shyly, but continued with her explanation.

"The writing is unusual," she continued, her voice eager and excited as she reached for another of the documents. "There are numerous dots and lines in this particular letter that suggest that this document, which is clearly from the 18th century, was written by a person taught to write in the late 16th century. It's very strange."

Edward felt his stomach plummet. None of the other researchers had caught anything like that before. In fact, even he had overlooked some of the anachronistic writing in the letters.

"What makes you say that?" he asked, moving closer to her.

"Look here," she said, holding out a magnifying glass for him. "The writer uses the thorn here at the beginning of the word 'that.' That is inconsistent with the time period. The thorn went out of popular use sometime at the beginning of the 17th century, but this paper and ink are from the 18th century. Also, if I didn't know better, I'd tell you that these documents which span a period of nearly three hundred years, were all written by the same three people."

There were more than twenty letters total, but she had grouped them into three sets. One pile contained the letters he had written himself, next to it was Carlisle's letters, and the third set was written by Aro.

"How very odd," Edward mused, stepping away from the lighted desk. "Any chance they are frauds?"

She turned around and pinned him with an angry glare.

"I dated these accurately and verified their authenticity," she said coldly.

Edward stifled a smile at her voracious defense of her work and tried to remain serious.

"I didn't mean to offend. What's your explanation, Bella?"

Her face moved from angry to speculative as she considered the question. She still hadn't read the documents for content, so he wasn't terribly concerned that she would pluck the truth out of thin air, but he was interested in her theory.

"I don't have one yet," she said, taking off her reading glasses and looking him straight in the eye, "but I assure you, I will have one before we're done here."

"I have no doubt," he whispered, gesturing for her to continue.

He enjoyed watching her work. She was nearly feral in her defense of her abilities, and Edward felt that that was only appropriate since he had never worked with anyone better at their job than Bella. She was so much more than a document analyst; she worked these documents like crime scenes and pulled out every clue she came across so that she could uncover every facet of the mystery.

She put the glasses back on and turned around to tackle the first set of documents. As she worked, she talked. Edward understood quickly that she wasn't really talking to him; she was airing out what was in front of her as she went through it.

"The first thing I want to do is try to set these up in order. If I can establish a continuum for the letters, a starting and endpoint at least for what we have, I can possibly figure out how they fit together."

Her fingers flitted to the oldest letter, Aro's first missive to Carlisle when he had heard of Edward's creation, and she picked it up reverently. Edward sank into the chair and lost himself for a moment in the memory of the day that letter had arrived.

_The year was 1536, and Edward was nearly a month old vampire. He was more controlled as a newborn than most, perhaps even as good as Carlisle had been. Though, his gift led him into temptation and digression from their diet on more than one occasion._

_The most recent of his kills, a drunkard who liked to torture and kill whores for sport, was rather satisfying. He begged for his life at the end and pissed his pants, but Edward showed him exactly as much mercy as he had shown his victims. None._

_Carlisle made little mention of his son's dietary indiscretions. Though he didn't approve, he couldn't argue that Edward culled his victims from the very bottom of the human population. It wasn't until nearly two weeks later that any mention of the kill was made at all._

_A letter arrived at their home, written on fine writing vellum and addressed to "The Esteemed Carlisle Cullen." Edward didn't recognize the handwriting, but Carlisle approached the letter with great trepidation._

"_I recognize the scent," he explained._

_Without further explanation, he opened the letter with lightening speed and his golden eyes moved rapidly back and forth across the page. His brow creased in worry and his frown deepening the further he read._

"_What does it say?" Edward asked impatiently. "Who is it from?"_

"_It is from Aro, of the Volturi coven. I crossed his path many years ago … he is a ruthless immortal, intent on procuring the most – unique – vampires for his collection. He wanted me as an oddity, a vegetarian vampire, but there was much that Aro and I did not agree upon. It seems _you _have intrigued him far more than I ever did."_

_Edward read the letter hastily. It seemed that someone, an immortal he and Carlisle had met in passing, had told this Aro about Edward's unique gift. Aro had been keeping track of them, monitoring their habits from afar. Somehow, he found out about the man Edward had killed and insinuated that Carlisle was unable to control his newborn; he was offering to "take charge" of the renegade._

"_I do not understand," Edward said. "Who would tell him of me?"_

"_Aro's gift is powerful and similar to yours. With a single touch, he can read every memory that a being holds. When he touches an immortal, he knows every other immortal they've come in contact with. I've been expecting this for some time now."_

Carlisle had sent a clipped reply that the situation was under control, and then the two of them had taken off in the night, running far away from the place they had called home from the time Edward awoke as a newborn.

Edward realized that he had been daydreaming of his past for the better part of an hour; however when he looked back at Bella, she was still pouring over the same letter. He wondered what she was finding in the strangely worded document that held her rapt attention. He inched over to her and smiled as her hand found his on the table, and she entwined her fingers absently with his.

"What have you found?" he asked, running his fingers down her back.

"This letter is … fascinating. So much different than the letters I examined in the US."

Edward stifled a chuckle. That was because the Mallory library only had access to the most mundane letters in his collection, ones that talked about human things such as supplies and the availability of game in different areas of Europe. There was never anything to suggest _how_ the writers sought out that game.

"What are the differences?"

"Well, this letter employs several old Italian phrases within the body of the letter, despite being written mostly in Old English. It's odd … as though both the writer and the reader were well versed in both languages."

"And that is odd?" he asked.

"Quite. Most of the population was lucky to be able to read one language. Two was nearly unheard of in this time."

"So two scholars," Edward said with a smile.

"Likely," she answered distractedly. "There are other, less likely possibilities. It could be someone writing to a family member that moved. It could be between two members of the clergy. It could be … any number of things. I'm hoping to know more when I read more."

"Why do you say those things are less likely?" he asked, entranced by the way her mind worked through these problems.

"Most often, people of this time period didn't transplant themselves around Europe. They often went on pilgrimages, but they didn't up and leave the family that they had to go elsewhere. It was fraught with danger because their livelihood depended on having their family around to help support them. I'm not saying it _didn't_ happen, but it wasn't usual. Travel just wasn't as common as it is these days."

She ran her gloved fingers of the document and murmured to it lovingly. Were it not for Edward's enhanced hearing, he wouldn't have heard her.

"Who are you?" she asked silently. "Tell me your secrets."

He fell a little more in love with her in that moment, watching her speak to his past. He walked back to the seat and let her be, amazed by the way she confronted the history in front of her. As she continued to murmur to the writer of the letter, Edward fell back into his memories, remembering the lead up to the second letter.

_They had been in hiding for nearly a year. Hiding was, perhaps, an overly strong word. They were being cautious about where and when they hunted and they were keeping a lower profile than they had before. It all grated on Edward's newborn nerves terribly._

_Carlisle was stubbornly silent on the issue of Aro and the Volturi, though his thoughts spoke volumes about them. He tried hard not to judge anyone, but in his mind Carlisle demonized Aro and his militaristic clan of elite vampires. He was getting better at blocking his thoughts from Edward, but what little bits and pieces Edward _did_ see were shocking. It was enough to make Edward more cautious about his actions and places that he went._

_One day he was hunting on the outskirts of a village when the frantic thoughts of a woman reached him from some distance. She was in terrible pain and frightened beyond all rational thought. Over and over, he heard her thinking "mīn __lȳtling__." _My child.

_Edward ran like the wind toward the sound of the woman's thoughts, all care for his own protection lost in the fear and pain he heard in her thoughts. He smelled the blood before he saw her and his eyes darkened, not in thirst but in anger. He could hear it now; the woman was being beaten. The man's thoughts were worse than the woman's. Edward could sense the pleasure he took in her screams and her fear. He thrived upon it; sought out more._

_Edward climbed a tree and surveyed the scene in the clearing. The man straddled the limp, bloodied body of his wife. Off to the side, he saw the crumpled form of a baby, lifeless and misshapen. Edward read from the man's thoughts what had transpired. The wife had come upon him in the midst of killing the babe. She retaliated, finally striking back at the man who had hurt her for so long. Edward's dead heart ached for the woman whose life was being snuffed out in front of him._

_He made his decision swiftly and acted on instinct. He swept into the clearing, boxing the man's ears between his steel fists too quickly for the man to even see him. Blood spurted from the man's ears as he looked first one way and then the other to see his attacker, but Edward hid himself in the trees … watching._

"_Wh-who's there?" he cried in his language._

_Edward swept in again, seizing the man by the throat and hurtling toward the opposite end of the clearing. He heard the tree crack against the man's weight and the following thud as the man slumped upon the ground. Again, Edward waited._

_The man's breaths came in gurgling gasps and Edward could hear his heart beating quick as a rabbit's in fear. He smiled darkly, allowing the monster in him to take free rein._

"_Charles." _

_He sang the man's name in a low, somber tone that barely carried above the whisper of the wind. The frightened man looked from side to side, and raised a trembling, crooked hand to his forehead as he made the sign of the cross._

"_Tsk, tsk," Edward clucked. "God has no use for you now."_

_Edward swooped down upon him, his white teeth bared in a terrible grin, and saw his terrible visage in the man's jumbled, fear-soaked thoughts. Edward smiled as he easily squeezed the man's throat, snuffing out his life. He left him crumpled and lifeless on the ground, too disgusted by him to even entertain the thought of draining him._

_The woman's heart was beating weakly and she was covered with blood. Edward held his breath, picked her up, and ran back to where he knew Carlisle would be waiting. When he saw his father's eyes as he looked upon the broken woman, he knew that something in the ancient vampire had changed. It wasn't until she awoke into the new life, confused and dazzled by the newness of immortality and returned Carlisle's wondering gaze that Edward realized he had saved Carlisle's mate that day._

Edward shook off the terrible memory of the first day he met Esme. She had grown to be as much of a mother to him as Carlisle had been a father. But it was senseless to torture himself with those memories. His foster parents were gone. But perhaps, with the right clues, he could find a way to bring them home again.

* * *

Bella worked for nearly three more hours before she turned off the backlit table and began to roll her shoulders. Edward walked over to behind her at what he considered an excruciatingly slow pace and began to massage the knots out of her neck for her. She rolled her head back and sighed in pleasure at his touch.

"I've missed your touch," she murmured, but then her eyes flew open and she blushed. "I guess that sounds a bit pathetic, doesn't it?"

Edward smiled down at her.

"Only if it wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear."

Bella let her eyes flutter shut and sighed again as Edward massaged her shoulders and back. She leaned her head against his stomach and he tensed at the closeness of her. Her warm breath caressed his skin through his clothing, stirring his desire. He saw her smile when his arousal became evident to her and she wiggled against him, causing him to groan and bite his lip.

"Okay, Edward?" she asked impishly.

"Mmm," he murmured, a smile spreading across his face. "Quite. We should talk about our plans for this week, however."

He bent down and brought his lips close to her ear. He delighted in the way she shivered at his touch, leaned into his embrace and gasped when his mouth brushed her skin.

"You said we needed to visit Cambridge and the main library in London this week," she said, coming out of daze. "Do you think we might work in a trip down the river at some point? I've always wanted to say I traveled on the Thames."

"Of course," Edward responded immediately. "We can travel as many rivers as you like, love."

Edward froze for a moment, wondering how she might respond to the name which came all too easily to his lips. She made no mention of it, but Edward knew she had noted it and was likely tucking it away to discuss later. In many ways, he liked that she was putting some discussions off until later. It meant that she was eager to keep up their acquaintance. The more she put off, the longer they would have together. Edward liked that a great deal.

"One of the documents I'd like you to look at is _not_ a letter actually. It is a hand drawn map, complete with compass and legend. I'd of course like your opinion on its dating, but I'd also like you to compare it with some of the letters you've looked at today."

"Of course," she responded immediately. "This is turning into quite the mystery. I can't wait to unravel all of the pieces."

"I admit I'm looking forward to that as well, Bella," Edward said.

Edward wondered if his face was easy to read for her and not for the first time cursed whatever caused the block between her mind and his. _Perhaps it is better this way_, he thought. _At least this way I won't know until she tells me that I have frightened her away._

* * *

_**A/N: **__So, the "thorn" is this " þ " and in Old English it made the "th" sound in words. It did, in fact, die out of common usage when Bella said it did. I am not, nor do I pretend to be, a document expert. I'm well versed in languages, mostly of the English variety, but it has been some years since I studied this stuff on an academic level. If you happen to be a document or language expert and you find something faulty in this story, please forgive me and let me know nicely? I like to have my facts straight and do plenty of research, but things can get by me. I hope that the bits and pieces of Edward's history will help you to begin to piece together his story. One thing I wanted to mention. This is an AU story. As such, you shouldn't take any canon elements for granted. For instance, it would be faulty to assume that Jasper is created in Texas during the time period he was in canon; all of the characters have a unique history in this story and it will be revealed as the story progresses. =)_


	8. Nightmares and Dreamscapes

_Touch your lips just so I know_

_In your eyes, love, it glows so_

_I'm bare boned and crazy for you_

_When you come crash_

_Into me, baby_

_And I come into you._

_**Crash Into You,**__ Dave Matthews Band 1996_

_**Disclaimer:**__ SM owns me, them, and Twilight. I own this storyline. In as much as one can own a story posted online. ;)_

_My betas rock the house and are overly patient with my anal-retentive need to hash through plotlines. Thanks, as always, to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs._

* * *

_His icy heat was all around her, covering her, moving in her, driving her mad. She called out his name, but he hovered above her, smiling wickedly down at her. Silent. His eyes, obsidian disks ringed in golden fire, burned through her to her very soul, and she felt as though her thoughts lay bare before him though he could not see them._

_She understood that he knew her, felt her, tasted her essence and craved more. She writhed beneath him, and he moved with her, her body molding to his, heat to ice, melting together. His velvet voice dripping in lust whispered her name as she ground into him, pulling him closer, wanting to feel him everywhere._

"_More," she cried, her body throbbing with need as he moved above her._

"_I can't," he murmured._

_She drew back, the desire washing away as concern took over. He was hurt, retreating from her. The pain in his eyes cut through her, and her heart seemed to stop in her chest. She waited, wondering what he would do next._

_His pale hand reached out to her, but he was drifting away from her. She tried to run forward, to catch him and bring him back to her, but she couldn't move._

_Darkness surrounded her and in the blackness, she heard him saying her name. His voice was layered in pain, and she knew he needed her. Flashes of light, like streaks of lightening across a midnight sky, lit up the darkness that surrounded her._

_He was out there in the black nothingness. As the light flashed, she saw him revealed. First, his eye, a topaz jewel shining in the light … it was trained on her, even in the darkness, as though he could see her even without the light. Then she saw his hands, blurs in the light as he reached for her faster than possible._

_The light changed, tinged red and flashing, and Edward was snarling at something behind her. His eyes were black terror, and she knew that she should fear him, but she could not. When he leapt into the air, hurtling above her, her scream …_

… woke her out of the strange dream.

Bella was shivering though she was covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Edward hovered over her, holding her face between his hands as she slowly remembered where and when she was. She was in England, and she had asked Edward to stay the night.

"Shh," he murmured, stroking her damp hair away from her face as the tremors began to settle. "What happened? Can you tell me?"

She shook her head violently and pulled the covers up to her chin, as the dream images flashing in her mind slowly began to fade. Edward moved carefully around behind her and cradled her back to his chest. She relaxed into his embrace, letting the feel of his body ground her.

"It didn't start as a nightmare," she whispered, chuckling darkly.

His hand moved in steady, gentle circles over her hip and up her side and then back again. The chill of his fingertips, now familiar and welcome, sent shivers down her body as she remembered the first half of her dream. Edward over her, under her, _in_ her. Bella scooted close to him so that her back was flush against his chest. He drew his knees up under hers, spooning her completely, and she smiled.

"Tell me," he whispered, brushing a kiss against her neck.

His breath raised gooseflesh on her still damp, oversensitive skin. As his hands moved over her arm and down her back, she cursed the cotton of her pajamas, wanting to feel his skin on hers, surrounding her as he had in her dream.

"We were making love," she whispered.

She caught his hand as it froze near her wrist and pulled it tight around her body, tucking it under her chin so that he was wrapped around her.

"This was _before_ the nightmare part, correct?" he asked, an ironic note in his voice.

Bella's laugh pealed through the darkness as she twisted in his arms to look at him. His face was a dim glow in the darkness of the hotel room, but she could see his warm eyes, crinkled into tiny triangles. He pulled his hand free to run it over her face as she laughed.

"Yes, that was before the nightmare," she said after the laughter had died down. "It was beautiful. You … were so beautiful while you loved me."

Even if she hadn't felt his desire pressing against her, she would have seen it in the way his pupils dilated, and he leaned ever closer to her. He closed his eyes as he dipped his nose closer to her neck, just skimming the surface of her skin. Bella's hand found its way into his soft hair, tugging roughly on him until his mouth was inches from hers.

She licked her lips as he leaned over her, his bare chest pressing against hers, and she wanted to tear at her shirt so she could feel him against her.

"What happened next?"

His voice was a husky whisper, and his breath rolled over her face. She let out a shaky sigh and continued.

"Everything went dark around me and … you weren't with me. I could hear your voice and you sounded … hurt, frightened … because you couldn't reach me."

His fingers paused in the path they were trailing over her face, and his eyes locked with hers. Bella could tell that he was waiting, wondering what would come next. She plunged ahead.

"And then it got weird," she said, furrowing her brows. "It was like I was seeing you in bits and pieces. There were these … flashes of lightening? And every time something flashed, I saw a different part of you. But it was odd, because you weren't _you_. You were … superhuman or something. And then the light changed again to a throbbing red color, and you saw something behind me. I knew you were trying to protect me, but Edward … you were terrible in your fury."

Her lips trembled as she remembered seeing him fierce and protective, leaping over her in a way that was entirely … inhuman. Though it was a dream, she wondered why it seemed so real to her.

"So I was part of your nightmare?" he asked quietly.

"No," Bella said quickly, shaking her head. "It was like there was something horrible that I couldn't see, but you could. You were trying to protect me, but your _face_ … my God, you were terrifying. I would hate to be on the receiving end of that anger."

He was silent for a while, thinking over what she said perhaps. As he thought, she memorized his face. It was almost impossible to imagine the soft, gentle lines drawn in anger the way she had seen them in her dreams. And yet … it was there. She could see the potential if she looked carefully.

"If you were in danger, I would do everything in my power to protect you."

His words held the weight of a solemn promise. She ran her fingers over his face, tracing the perfect curve of his cheek down to his mouth. Behind his words, she saw the fear of rejection in his eyes. He was afraid that she had woken from the dream afraid of him in some way, and she needed to reassure him, calm his worry.

"I trust you," she replied, honestly.

"Has it occurred to you that you shouldn't?" he asked quietly.

Her brows knitted together in confusion. His smile was sad, and his eyes were miles away. She ran her fingers over his face again, trying to drive away the melancholy she saw written plainly there.

"Never," she answered after a moment. "I have _never_ questioned whether or not to trust you. Perhaps that makes me overly naïve in your eyes …"

Edward chuckled and leaned his forehead against hers, his body nearly covering hers.

"No, Bella. Far from it. But I wonder at it, and what you see in me … all part of the mystery surrounding you."

Bella shifted her body, moving more comfortably under his and looked up at him boldly.

"The mystery surrounding me?" she asked, one eyebrow raised ironically. "For someone shrouded in mystery and unanswered questions, you don't have much room to talk."

His crooked grin spread across his face making her heart stutter in her chest. Though it was the middle of the night, she was wide awake and so was he … she wanted more from him, and she wasn't so tired that she would accept his platitudes this time.

She moved slowly, trailing her fingers through his hair until they reached his shoulders. When her skin made contact with his, he shuddered. She caressed his back with a feather-light touch, watching his eyes darken as she moved.

"Bella," he whispered, the tone of his voice heavier, reverent and full of desire.

His arms were on either side of her head, and he lifted himself up, his chest inches from hers. She arched her back, and they were touching. It was right; the way their bodies fit together seamlessly felt more right to Bella than anything ever had in her life.

"Tell me you want me," she murmured, her lips already reaching for his.

"You know I do." His voice was strained as he pulled his face just out of her reach. "But we can't … I can't. Not yet."

She tugged on his neck, trying to bring him closer to her, but it had no effect on him. He remained just out of her reach, so much like her dream.

"Why?" she asked, the hurt leaking into her voice unbidden.

She knew she shouldn't judge him by the men who came before, the ones who used her, the ones who left her. But no matter how she turned it around in her head, she couldn't understand why he would hold back. She _knew_ he loved her. The answer came to her so suddenly that she gasped.

"Edward, there's never going to be anyone else for me. I've known you for four days, and I can tell you that with perfect certainty … if that's what you're worried about."

He smiled, sadly again, and brushed his lips against hers once, twice. On the third pass he kissed her fully, his silken lips moving with hers, making her moan with desire again. Her heartbeat quickened as he gave into the kiss, his mouth moving harder, his tongue delving deeper.

"Let go," she gasped as his mouth moved, feathering kissing along her jaw and neck. "Give me what we both want."

"I can't."

His voice was a strangled cry of restrained desire, and his head fell heavy against her shoulder.

"I want to," he whispered, his breath tickling her skin as he spoke. "You have no idea how long I've waited for you … how much I want you. But I can't. Not yet."

Bella held him cradled against her, his head resting against her chest as she stroked his hair. Her heart still thumped against her ribcage, and her blood boiled beneath the surface aching for more of his touch, something to release this tension that had built in her from the first moment that he'd touched her. But her mind was a snarl of doubt and confusion. Their roles seemed reversed. She was begging for him to give in, and he was putting on the brakes. As he settled beside her, sighing as her fingers continued to move in his hair, she thought over the best way to ask him the question that was burning in her mind.

"Are you going to leave me?"

Her voice was weak, too soft to carry further than his ears, but she felt the force of her words hit him, and he recoiled from it, from her. He picked his head up and looked at her, his eyes burning with sincerity.

"I will never leave you … willingly."

When he kissed her again, the promise of his love was in his kiss, and she gave into it. She lost herself in him so easily, giving into the need she felt to be near him. As he pulled away, she framed his face with her hands and looked deep into his eyes.

"Sometimes you say things … and I know there are clues there to what you're not telling me. I just wish I could figure you out, and we could move past all of … this."

"You say that as though figuring me out won't change anything," he said with a bitter laugh.

"It won't change how I feel about you."

"And how is that?"

Part of her wanted to shake him, hard, until he opened his eyes and saw what was right in front of him. Could her love for him be any more plain? Could her feelings be any more obvious? But she understood the need for reassurances; she felt it too.

"I love you," Bella said softly, finally putting a voice to her feelings. "Nothing could change that."

She wanted him to smile, to pull her close and tell her that's all that mattered. She wanted to hear him return the words to her. Instead, he shook his head as though in disbelief.

"Until you know the whole truth, you can't know the weight of that kind of promise."

At first, Bella felt his words like a slap in the face. Was he questioning her ability to _love_ him? But as she looked into his eyes, she saw it was more than that. There was a grief in his eyes that she didn't understand, a loneliness there that seemed to go through his entire being. It wasn't that he doubted her love or her feelings; it was something much more, something that she could barely wrap her mind around.

"What pain have you known?" she asked, her voice thick with tears as she contemplated the grief she saw in his eyes.

He seemed shocked at her question, and as quickly as the pain had appeared in his eyes, it vanished. She shook her head and sighed.

"Edward, I don't know all of the answers to your mysteries yet, but we'll go a slow as you want. I'm not going anywhere."

They had been talking for over an hour. Bella felt the yawn building and tried to stifle it, but Edward smiled knowingly.

"We have a big day of travel tomorrow," he said, laying more naturally beside her and opening his arms so that she could arrange herself more comfortably. "Do you think you can sleep now?"

She nodded, fitting herself in his embrace and sighing when his arms were locked tight around her. Already, sleep was sneaking up on her, and she yawned again.

"Sleep well, my love," Edward murmured in her ear, settling his head on the pillow next to hers.

As reality slipped further and further away, and Bella drifted closer to the brink of dreams, she heard Edward's voice in her head, whispering to her. Her still conscious mind wondered if it was real or a dream.

"I love you, too," his voice called, softer than a breeze.

And Bella was asleep again.

* * *

In the morning, they journeyed by train from Oxford to Cambridge. The ride was pleasant, if quiet, and Bella enjoyed sitting by the window, watching the countryside pass by her in a blur.

Edward sat at her side, his fingers playing with her jacket distractedly. She sensed that there was much on his mind, but she wasn't in the mood to pry it out of him. There were things about him that she didn't understand, but Bella gathered that he wouldn't appreciate her digging too deeply into what was troubling him. She trusted that he would talk about it when he was ready.

Instead, she used the ride to think about the letters she had examined the day before. She had read through all of them, and they were a fascinating mix of contradictions. They spanned centuries, not decades as she had first supposed. The grouping that she had brought from the states fit squarely in the middle of the set housed in the Bode and appeared to be from a rather idyllic time in the family's history.

She had found several things that troubled her, some of which she shared with Edward, others she kept to herself. There were names mentioned in some of the early letters that were repeated in the later letters. It was likely that they were just children named after distant ancestors, but still it bothered Bella. Place names, characteristics … they kept cropping up in different letters. It was possible that she was reading too much into the similarities, but they something about them nagged at her.

Bella thought they would be going straight to one of the libraries, but Edward surprised her by directing her toward the town. They spent the better part of their first day walking around the town and acting like lovesick tourists, only Edward had the benefit of knowing the city inside and out. He took Bella to the most interesting sites. His behavior was markedly different than it had been on the train when he was silent and brooding. As they walked around, he was an animated tour guide, and he showered her with attention.

"Have you had your fill of the attractions yet?" Edward asked, winding his arm around her waist.

"There's so much to see, I don't know how I could possibly get my fill," she responded, looking around at the buildings wistfully.

Edward smiled and guided her slowly toward the edge of the river where a family of swans was entering the water. There were flat boats lined along the bank, and a little old man with a green fanny pack was taking the tourists' money so that they could take a romantic row out on the old Cam River. Bella twisted around to look up at Edward who was smiling knowingly at her, already fishing for his wallet.

Bella noticed how effortlessly Edward steered the boat, never faltering the way that many of the other men did as they navigated the waterway. His shoulders, arms and hands moved fluidly with the oars so that their boat glided through the water smoothly and quickly, far outpacing the other boats.

Bella leaned back in the boat, thinking over the past several days with Edward: the things he had revealed and the thing he had yet to tell her. She wanted to know the whole truth about this man because she knew with certainty that she was in love with him. However, the problem still remained that he had secrets. Despite feeling a desperate need to be with him, the fact that there were parts of him she didn't know about or understand frightened her.

"Edward," she said, "if I ask you questions, will you answer them?"

His rowing motion paused for only a fraction of a second before he smiled crookedly and nodded.

"I'll answer anything you ask," he said.

"Honestly?"

"Of course," he replied, furrowing his brows. "Have I given you reason to believe I'd lie to you?"

"No, it isn't that," she said. "You told me on the night when I woke up and found you in my room that I must be patient in hearing what your 'but' is. I wondered if I asked you something about yourself whether you would answer honestly."

He thought for a moment, looking at her with a strange mixture of fascination and sadness before nodding his head again.

"I told you before that I wouldn't lie to you."

"You also told me there were things you couldn't tell me."

He smiled and shook his head.

"That's true. I'll answer truthfully, or tell you that I can't answer. Fair?"

"Fair," Bella said, nodding determinedly.

Bella thought over the many things she wanted to ask him, the countless tidbits she had stored away, but decided to focus on something easy to start with.

"You row quite well," she commented. "Do you do so often?"

"Not recently," he said softly. "But as a younger man I rowed almost daily."

Bella nodded, taking a moment to study his physique again. He had the strange male gift of indefinite age. He could have been twenty-three or he could have been thirty-three for all Bella could tell. She decided to move on.

"Why do you never eat?" she asked hesitantly, knowing this would be more difficult for him to answer.

He continued to row, breathing in and out with each stroke, and thinking.

"I do eat," he replied ambiguously.

"Fair enough," Bella said. "Why do you never eat with me?"

"I told you," he said, his lips curling into a smirk. "I am on a special diet."

"Tell me about it," she demanded.

"No."

"But you said …"

"I said I wouldn't lie," he answered. "This is a question I cannot answer honestly right now. Allow me to defer the question."

Bella bit her lip, unhappy with his answer but unwilling to push him too far. She looked around and realized that they had rowed well away from the heavier trafficked part of the river. There were weeping willow trees dipping their branches into the water. Bella reached out and caught one with her finger, pulling it along with her and then letting it fall into the river, creating ripples in the water.

"What do you see in me?" she asked quietly.

Edward continued rowing, but his eyes seemed to darken minutely and his nostrils flared momentarily.

"You are beautiful," he murmured. "You are unintentionally sexy and defiantly different from everyone around you. You are clever and witty. You are sensationally good at what you do. You are independent, enigmatic, and enlightening. And you are possibly one of the most intelligent women I've ever met, which I find incredibly fucking sexy."

Bella's heart stopped for a moment as Edward voice dipped lower, becoming an almost guttural growl at the end. She had never much enjoyed foul language, but hearing Edward call her _fucking sexy_ turned her on in ways she found both exciting and slightly embarrassing. _So much for being independent_, she thought.

Edward rowed the boat up to a bank underneath a willow tree and offered Bella his hand as she stepped out of the boat.

"Is it okay to leave it here?" she asked, sighing unintentionally as she took his hand.

"We're not going far. I thought we could sit under the tree and talk for a while."

When they reached the tree, Bella realized that talking was not what Edward had on his mind. She leaned against the curvy trunk of the tree and Edward came around in front of her, his eyes now noticeably darker than they were before. He reached his hand underneath her hair, stroking the overheated skin with his cool fingers.

"Why do your eyes do that?" she asked breathlessly.

"Do what?" he purred, his face inching closer to hers.

"They get darker … when you're closer to me … mmm." Bella lost coherent thought as he ran his nose along the line of her jaw.

"Because I'm hungry, Bella," he whispered hoarsely, "for you."

Like hearing the word _fuck_ on his mellow tongue, hearing him murmur hoarsely about being _hungry _for her turned Bella to jelly. His fingers tangled gently in her hair and tugged her head back softly so that her neck was completely exposed to him. His lips moved over her throat, pulling her skin between his lips as he went. She gasped and pulled him closer. His mouth moved up her jaw to her mouth. She ran her tongue along his lips, and his mouth opened greedily, ready for her.

Bella could feel herself losing control as she ran her fingers through his hair, and he pressed his body against her. Slowly, almost inevitably, he began to ease her down from the fervor of their kisses. Bella whimpered softly and pulled at his hair in frustration.

"I'm hungry too," she panted, blushing but unable to hold back. "You don't know how much I want you."

"I do," he said, feathering kisses on her face, down her neck and across her exposed chest. "I can feel it every time you touch me."

Bella arched her back away from the tree, allowing Edward better access to her breasts, aching to feel him lose control again.

"Please," she begged him as his fingers ghosted over her sweater and played torturously with the hem. "Touch me. I need to feel you on my skin."

With a groan, Edward slipped his hands underneath of her sweater and slid his fingers against the soft plane of her stomach. She felt him quivering with desire as his fingers traced patterns over her skin. Bella gasped and pulled at him, trying to make him feel how badly she wanted more.

"Not here," he breathed in her ear. "I can't do this to you here."

"Why?" she asked, her voice whining even to her own ears.

"Because you deserve so much more than this," he growled.

She pulled away from him and looked up, her eyes shiny with unshed tears and her face flushed with embarrassment and desire.

"You don't want me," she said, defeated.

She turned and ducked under the branch of the tree and stood on the other side, looking out at the reeds blowing lazily in the wind.

"Do you truly think that?"

Edward had moved so quickly and silently, that Bella never saw or heard him. Still, he was standing in front of her again, a pained, desperate look on his face. Her throat was closed with unshed tears that she was fighting desperately, so she simply nodded.

He reached up to her face and cradled it in his hands, gently stroking her cheekbones. As he stroked her, the tears let loose and she felt them drip down her cheeks and onto his thumbs.

"There's always an excuse, Edward," she whispered. "It's so easy for you to resist me."

When she looked back up at Edward's face and saw him swimming in her line of vision, she saw something unexpected on his face. There was pure desire and something else. She saw what she always expected love to look like. Her heart picked up the staccato rhythm of hope when she saw him smile crookedly at her and watched as he wiped away another stray tear. Instead of wiping it away on his slacks or on her shirt, he brought it to his lips.

His eyes fluttered closed as his finger disappeared into his mouth and a strangled sound of lust erupted from his throat. When his eyes opened, they were nearly pitch-black.

"I will have you, Bella Swan," he said, his voice gravelly and full of coarse desire. "But when I do, it will be perfect. Not an accident."

His lips found hers in a moment of insistent need, and she gave into his kiss fully, wanting to believe his words, wanting to believe that someday this man would make her his.

* * *

_**A/N**__: As many of you have pointed out, the mystery surrounds not only the papers, but Edward as well … at least for Bella. We have the benefit of knowing just what he is. My idea of how a person like Bella might go from rational understanding of the world to accepting that her boyfriend is undead is slightly different than SM's, I think. Many of you have said that Bella should have noticed certain things about Edward at this point, but she seems to be ignoring them. That's the reason for the beginning of this chapter. I wanted to show you that she _is_ picking up on this stuff, but a lot of it is being relegated to her subconscious at the moment. I think that's how most of us would deal with something as fantastic as meeting a real vampire and having to puzzle out what he really is. With the letters, Bella _will_ figure this out. If you're having fun putting the puzzle together with her, one of the readers has graciously set up a Twilighted thread on the forums for this story. I figure it can be our own little clean room where we can discuss theories and I'll hop into the discussion as much as possible! Thanks so much for all of your support. I can't tell you how pleased I am with the success of this story! ~Jen _


	9. Suspicions Begin in the Library

_You make me feel like a sticky pistil_

_Leaning into her stamen._

_You make me feel like Mr. Sunshine himself._

_You make me feel like splendor in the grass where we're rolling_

_Damn skippy baby_

_You make me feel like the Amazon's running_

_Between my thighs._

_You make me feel love…_

_**Feelin' Love**__, Paula Cole 1998_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own Edward, Bella, or the Cambridge Library (dammit). But I do own a burning desire to see E and B get it on _in_ a library. Lol_

_Many thanks to my betas, DeJean Smith, swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are the best. And thanks, of course, to you all for reading. You make me giddy with your love._

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Bella still felt the tingling of Edward's kisses on her lips even hours later. Every time his hand got close to her, it was as if some magnetic force drew her closer to him. She felt like a teenager, constantly craving his touch. What made her need almost painful was her certainty that their intimacy had no effect on Edward. He remained stoic for the rest of the day. He touched her chastely, kissed her forehead or hand at times, but he never looked at her hungrily the way he had under the willow, the way she desperately wanted him to look at her. No, he only smiled his maddeningly crooked smile and then looked away. The only thing that distracted her was the questions about who or what he really was, and of course, the mystery surrounding the documents.

She had decided after his vague answers to open her mind to other possibilities, things that were perhaps outside her comfort zone. He'd given her enough evidence over the past few days, little overly-intuitive answers to others' questions, to believe him when he said that he could read minds. If that was possible, Bella thought there might be lots of strange things out there that she never thought were possible before.

Bella still didn't know very much about what he was looking for or why these documents were so important to him. She began to press him a bit more about the papers as they continued to explore Cambridge. He wouldn't answer most of her questions, evading them with inquiries of his own or touristy distractions. As the evening wore on and the misty light began to fade from the day, Bella finally turned to him with a determined look in her eye.

"I want to know the truth, Edward," she said. "I want to know why I'm here."

"I'm not sure I understand," he said, taken aback by her sudden change in emotion. "Why you are here with me or …"

"No, why I'm in England at all!"

Bella threw her hands up in frustration and shook her head. Games and mysteries were all well and good, but this was her career he was playing with.

"You're here because I need your expertise," he said fluidly. "I thought that would have been fairly clear."

"I understand that," she said, exasperation creeping into her tone. "Why me? Some of the best document experts live in England. Why did you send to America looking for a mostly unknown document specialist?"

"Well, you are most certainly not unknown, Ms. Swan," Edward replied. "The books you have written about the cases you have worked on made their way to some very important people in the field. That is how you came to Ms. Mallory's attention."

"Okay … and?"

"And Ms. Mallory is a … respected colleague."

"That isn't the impression that I got from you when we first met."

Edward held his hands out in front of him and smiled.

"Okay …" he said, his face appearing sheepish. "Your books came to _my_ attention and Ms. Mallory is my agent in the states. She was doing me a favor."

"So I've been working for you all along," Bella said after a moment's pause.

"Does that upset you?"

"Upset is a harsh word," Bella said contemplatively. "I ... dislike being on uncertain ground. I feel as though I am walking on quicksand around you, both personally and professionally. I'd like to feel more stable."

Bella looked up at him openly and honestly, hoping that he would read between the lines of the words she uttered. She had made so many concessions for him; she needed him to make a few for her.

"The last thing I want is for you to feel unstable," Edward said, reaching for her hand. "I imagine that it is frustrating to someone who is used to finding answers quickly to be thwarted, but I _know_ that you will find these answers. And Bella, I am certain that it will be better for both of us if you put the pieces together yourself."

"Do you have any idea how that sounds?" Bella asked him, a frown creasing her brow.

"I'm guessing … frustrating," he replied with a smile.

Bella shook her head and smiled ruefully back at him.

"Frustrating is only the tip of the iceberg, Edward. It's one thing to be told that you need me to solve a mystery for you; it's quite another to be told that you _know_ the mystery … you're just not telling me."

"Perhaps I haven't been clear then," Edward said, pulling on her hand gently and directing her to a bench. "It's true that there are parts of this … mystery, as you call it … that I know. There are a great many things that I _don't _know. I'm hoping you can help me with those things as well."

"So … in order to figure out the parts of the mystery that you _don't_ know, I have to solve the part that you _do_ know. Really, wouldn't it be easier if you just told me what you know?"

Bella eyed him skeptically as he seemed to consider her question. She felt her heart begin to race as she contemplated what he might say.

"Easier, perhaps," he said softly.

Edward looked down and shook his head.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I'm a coward, Bella," he whispered, looking back up at her.

She could see raw fear in his eyes when she looked at him. It made her reach out to him, touching his face.

"I'm so afraid that if I tell you, you'll run away."

"I told you last night. Nothing I find out would make me leave you. Nothing."

He smiled and leaned into her hand, his skin soft under her touch.

"Allow me my cowardice for now?" he pleaded. "I think you are so close, love."

"How close?" she prodded. "Edward, I want to know so that we can move beyond whatever this is between us. I hate it!"

"I do as well, but I am still frightened. If you don't mind an evening library trip, perhaps we can put a dent in the mystery tonight."

"I guess," Bella said cautiously. "Will the library be open this late?"

"I know people; the library is open for me whenever I wish it to be," Edward said without a care. "Come, let's get you some dinner."

After some delicious steak and ale pie for one because Edward insisted that he was not hungry, they made their way through the dark streets of Cambridge. Bella's nerves had gotten the best of her, and she ceased questioning Edward after dinner. She didn't want to pester him so much that he became annoyed with her persistence.

They approached a strange, circular building which looked as though it had been transplanted from an ancient castle or stronghold. Its triple tiered archway was black and green with moss, adding to the mystique of the edifice. The air of mystery and intrigue surrounding the building made Bella shiver in spite of the relative warmth of the night. Edward's arm was around in her in an instant and she shivered again, this time in delight.

"This is the ancient artifact annex at Cambridge," Edward explained. "There are several thousand documents housed here along with four or five floors where only the rarest books are stored. Of course, there won't be anyone here at this hour to give you the guided tour. I hope you don't mind getting straight to work?"

Bella shook her head as Edward pulled a ring of keys from his pocket. He looked through, finding the one he was looking for, and slid it into the lock. Bella felt the darkness envelop her as she stepped into the room and heard the door close behind her. The silence hung around them as they stood in the blackness while Edward fumbled for the light switch. She breathed a sigh of relief as Edward lit a small desk lamp.

"I didn't want to light the whole place up; it might bring unwanted visitors."

_We wouldn't want that,_ Bella thought and then blushed at the visions swimming in her head. If he didn't want her on the bank of the river, he certainly wasn't going to take her in a library.

"The documents we're looking for are on the second floor," Edward said. "Follow close to me, and I'll turn on lights as we go."

Once in the clean room, Bella went immediately to work sifting through the five documents Edward brought out for her inspection. The first four were letters, much like the ones that she had seen in Oxford. The fifth was the map that Edward spoke of before. All of them were striking, however, in that they were not written in English, but rather in Italian.

"I confess that my Italian is a bit rusty," Bella muttered.

She had quickly dated the items and judged them to be written around the same time as the earliest specimens that she saw in Oxford, or perhaps just before. That meant they were roughly 400 years old.

"But you know some?" Edward asked, amused.

"I can get by," she said, smirking.

"I'm sure you can do more than get by," he said, running a hand down her back.

Bella did not respond, though his touch made her stomach flutter, instead concentrating on the documents. Throughout the first three documents she found much of the same information that she had seen before. People coming and going, visiting friends and family; questions about the whereabouts of goods and well-wishes for the New Year. Bella saw nothing of real interest or anything that would help her to solve the mystery … until she reached the fourth letter.

"Hmm," she murmured, bringing the letter closer to her eyes.

"What did you find?" Edward asked, coming up close behind her and making her shiver at the chill of his breath on her neck.

"I've never heard of this term before," she said, pointing to two words in the middle of the document. "_Stregoni Benefici_. Literally translated, I think it means 'Wizard's Benefit,' but that doesn't make any sense. And here it says that the words relate to ancient _vampiro leggende_."

Bella looked up at Edward expectantly.

"Vampire legends," he said softly.

"I know," she replied quietly, her eyes traveling over his features quickly and then darting back to the document. "It isn't – unusual for people of this time period to be – superstitious."

She was stuttering, tripping over her words as her mind raced through the information. Edward appeared cautious, unnaturally hesitant, as he relayed the translation. _Vampire legends?_ she thought and shuddered involuntarily. _Ridiculous, Isabella. You're simply letting the late hour addle your brain. Vampires aren't real._

"You consider it a silly superstition then?" Edward murmured.

"You don't?" she asked, her eyes meeting his, weighing his reaction.

"Clearly, the writer of these documents didn't think so," he answered.

Bella furrowed her brow and read on.

"The writer ends the letter saying '_Essi si stanno avvicinando_…' or 'They are getting close…'" Bella looked up from the document and met Edward's eyes.

"Your Italian is more than passable," he said with a smirk.

Bella ignored him and continued, "What do you think that means?"

"Well, perhaps the writer felt that someone was getting close to something," Edward said shrugging his shoulders.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Bella muttered with a smirk and turned around. "I think it's more than that," she said louder. "I think the writer of this letter had a secret … something to do with vampire legends … and he or she was worried about someone stumbling across that secret."

"It's possible," Edward said, his voice a trifle unsteady. "Everyone has secrets they wish to protect, don't they?"

Bella rolled her eyes at him and turned back to the letters, putting the nagging doubts and ridiculous speculations to the back of her mind so she could read on. She finished dating the letters based on the writing and other markers that she could find. When she was convinced that everything was in order, she turned around to Edward who was again watching her with fascination.

"I do enjoy watching you work," he said.

"I think I've done everything I can tonight," she said, stretching. "I'd like to come back tomorrow and look through some of the books housed here to see if I can nail down some particulars about the time period."

"Of course," he said. "I have business to attend to tomorrow, so I will be unable to join you, but I will be happy to drop you off here and give you the entire day to conduct any research you see fit. Did you come to any conclusions?"

"Not yet," Bella said guardedly as she tidied up the work area, "but I'm not dismissing any possibilities at the moment."

"Even the possibility that silly superstitions aren't just that?" Edward asked teasingly.

"I never called them silly," Bella said seriously. "That was you. And no, not even the validity of certain superstitions. If you can read minds, anything is possible, right?"

Edward looked at her, shocked for a moment. She saw him unguarded in that moment, possibly even fearful. She wondered how close she really was. Given that the night had contained mention of mythological creatures such as vampires, she felt a wave of fear run through her. _But that's just ridiculous … isn't it?_ she wondered.

_More importantly,_ she thought,_ does it even matter?_ She already knew the answer to that. It wouldn't matter if he was a ghost, a demon, or an undead warrior from the Middle Ages … she loved him. And she'd just have to adjust her perceptions to include some altered realities in her view of the world if that's what it took to be with him. _How fantastically equitable of you, Bella_, she chided herself.

Edward led her out of the room when she was done putting the documents back and began turning off lights as they went. The increasing darkness and the silence surrounding them had a surprising effect on Bella. She could almost feel the electric pull of Edward as they walked down the steps and toward the door. It was as if with the increasing darkness, the magnetism between them grew stronger. She was still spooked from reading about vampires and she thought that some of that fear was adding to her heightened senses.

Edward snapped off the last light and they were bathed in total darkness. Not even the moon was shining in. Bella found herself looking around blindly in the dark, her breathing coming faster as she reached out for Edward. Suddenly, he was behind her and her hand brushed against him. She couldn't tell what part of him she was touching; she only felt the current of heat running through her body that came with his presence and then the whoosh of air that told her he had moved closer to her.

He bent down to her with a groan and peppered kisses along the back of her neck. The dark lent an air of surprise to his kisses. As his mouth travelled along to her jaw line, Bella gasped in surprise. His mouth moved quickly, hungrily against her skin until he found her mouth and pressed his lips roughly to hers.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, pulling away after a second. "I shouldn't …"

"Shut up, Edward," she snapped, groping for his face and pulling it back to hers. "It's never going to be exactly perfect, you know."

She heard a low growl of desire purring in his chest as his lips found hers again, hungrily moving with hers. He wasn't stopping this time. Instead, he pulled her body against his, grinding his body against hers. _More_, her mind screamed as she clawed her fingers along his back and up to his hair.

His hands were in her hair, running down her neck, over her shoulders and finally grabbing her ass. Bella heard the desperate panting noises and understood that they were coming out of her mouth but could do nothing to stop herself from making them. All the while, she heard a low, purring growl coming from Edward as he kissed and licked along her neck and across her chest.

"God, that sound," she groaned, running her hands over his chest so that she could feel the vibrations it made through his body.

Immediately, it stopped, and she could tell that Edward was looking at her … waiting.

"Don't stop," she moaned, immediately pulling him back to her. "It's driving me wild!"

The sound returned as his hands found her ass again, lifting her up. Feeling his hands cupping her, holding her up, was incredible. Naturally, she immediately wanted more. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and threw her head back as she settled over his arousal. He was hard and she felt him pushing against her. Her hips rocked gently against him, finally feeling _him_ between her legs exactly where she wanted him.

Bella felt her back hit a wall gently and then all rational thought stopped as Edward leaned into her, moving with her rocking hips. His lips brushed up her neck until his mouth was covering hers again. Her breath came quickly as she moved her hands across his shoulders and down his chest, finding the buttons of his shirt and starting to undo them. After she had undone three buttons, Edward's hand clasped her fingers, and he gently stilled them.

"Bella—we can't," he said, his voice interrupted with a groan of desire as Bella continued to rock against him.

"We can," she whispered. "Just let go."

It was the words of her dream come back to haunt her. She tensed, waiting for him to pull away. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her more deeply. His hand traveled down her back and grabbed her, tighter this time, making her moan.

"I want this," she whispered, moving her lips against his and feeling his breath coming in ragged gasps. "I want you."

He kissed her hard, and she took his bottom lip between her teeth and bit down gently at first, then harder until she heard him hiss. She released him and his tongue was in her mouth in an instant, tangling with hers. She groaned into his mouth, moving herself more purposely against him.

"Let me take you to the hotel," he gasped, his fingers grabbing her hips and stilling them.

She let him ease her down to the ground, but she put her hands around his face and looked up at him.

"Please, Edward."

Her voice was small, and she leaned her forehead against his chest, fisting her hands on his shirt in a futile attempt to bring them back to where they were.

"Trust me," he whispered in her ear, capturing the lobe between his lips and sucking gently.

She gasped and took his hand as he began walking toward the door. When he opened it and the moonlight bathed his beautiful face, she saw the way his eyes were blackened with desire. _I did that to him_, she thought and smiled. Maybe there was hope yet.

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_**A/N:**__ Hmm. Will they? Won't they? Decisions, decisions. This chapter was originally supposed to include their trip back to the hotel, but in the interest of shorter chapter and quicker updates, I broke it up. So ... sorry about the evil cliffie. ;) Bella is _insanely _close to figuring this out and the bits of information she picked up this chapter and the tid-bits Edward will let slip next chapter will help it all settle into place. And you know … once she figures it out, it's no holds barred on the action and adventure picking up as well. I hope you continue to enjoy the ride; it's about to get bumpy in all the right ways. ;) Much love! ~Jen_


	10. Desire Reigns Supreme

_Come into these arms again and lay your body down_

_The rhythm of this trembling heart is beating like a drum_

_It beats for you – it bleeds for you – it knows not how it sounds_

_For it is the drum of drums; it is the song of songs._

…

_Oh loneliness – oh hopelessness to search the ends of time _

_For there is in all the world no greater love than mine._

_Let me be the only one to keep you from the cold_

_Now the floor of heaven's lain with stars of brightest gold._

_They shine for you – they shine for you – they burn for all to see_

_Come into these arms again and set this spirit free._

_**Love Song for a Vampire**__, Annie Lennox 1992_

_**Disclaimer**__: You all know this by now, but I don't own Twilight. Clearly, if I did, it wouldn't have been marketed as YA._

_My love and thanks to my betas, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are amazing. Also, the song used in this chapter has quickly become one of my favorite songs. To me, it sums up Edward's pain. If you haven't heard it, go listen to it. It's gorgeous._

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Edward called a cab, and they sat huddled together in the back seat, his hand gently stroking her neck. He paid the driver quickly when they arrived at the hotel and pulled her by the hand gently into the lobby. Edward had booked adjoining rooms on the sixth floor, and Bella watched him push the up arrow several times impatiently as they waited for the elevator.

She smiled mischievously and wrapped her arms around his forearm.

"In a hurry?" she asked, looking up at him innocently.

"You have no idea," he purred, leaning down and kissing her forehead.

She felt a tremor in his lips as he kissed her, and she held onto him more tightly. She wondered what he was planning and how much he was willing to give in.

They reached the door to Bella's room and when she fished the key card out of her pocket, Edward snatched it from her hand, his eyes dark again and his face tense. Bella felt a fluttering in her stomach as she looked at him, remembering his words from the river bank that afternoon. _Because I'm hungry, Bella … for you_. She really hoped so.

She walked through the door after Edward opened it for her. She felt, rather than heard him behind her. He shut the door quickly and blackness surrounded them. Bella stood still, afraid to move further into the unfamiliar room for fear of falling over something. Edward's arms were around her in an instant, and his lips were on her neck just behind her ear.

"Jesus, Edward," she gasped. "You startled me!"

He turned her around quickly, and she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I just couldn't wait any longer."

His lips were on hers again, and his hands found her ass. This time when he lifted her up, she was already reaching for him on tip toe. She wrapped her legs around his waist, kicking her slip-on shoes off and linked her feet behind him. He kneaded her bottom in the palm of his hands and her hips moved with him.

"Oh, God, you feel good," he groaned, walking with her over to the bed.

When he laid her down and knelt between her legs, Bella reached up for his shirt, finding his buttons. She could see him in the soft moonlight that filtered into her room; he almost glowed. She looked up at him with a question in her eyes, and he nodded. She undid the rest of the buttons with shaking fingers. He pulled the shirt off, throwing it behind him.

"I want to feel your skin on mine," she said quietly, running her fingers along the plane of his stomach.

He reached down and traced the edges of her v-neck sweater, brushing her skin as he went. Moving quickly, he found the bottom hem and lifted it up. Bella sat up and held her hands above her head as he pulled it off. She kneeled up on the bed in front of him and ran her fingers over his shoulders. He reached behind her and worked the stays of her bra off. She shrugged out of it and knelt before him. Edward wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

As their chests met, they both gasped at the feeling of electricity pulsing between them. Fire and ice, just like in her dream, they melted together perfectly. Slowly, he eased her backwards until she was lying on the bed underneath of him. He held himself away from her, so she wrapped her legs around him, trying to pull him down to her and keep him close to her.

"I'm not going anywhere," he murmured, sitting back on his heels and running his fingers down the inside of her thighs. "I want to try something."

She leaned backwards on the bed, her head thrown back in pleasure as his fingers caressed the soft flesh of her thighs through her jeans. She took her lip between her teeth as his fingers brushed the seam of her pants.

"Edward," she whispered as his fingers made a second pass over her, moving more firmly and sending a jolt a pleasure through her.

Her hips bucked upwards, pressing against his hand. Bella lifted up and began working at the button on her jeans. She wanted him, and she didn't think she could wait any longer. His hands covered hers, gently pushing them aside.

"We can't make love tonight, even though I want it more than I've ever wanted anything in my life," he whispered, leaning down and kissing her fingertips.

"But …" Bella murmured, confused because he seemed to still be moving forward.

"Someday you will understand how unfathomably long I have waited for you," he said, and his voice trailed off into a whisper. "Lifetimes."

She didn't understand what he meant, but his hand moved back to her thighs, and he brushed his fingers back and forth, moving ever closer to her center. She made an incoherent noise, somewhere between desire and frustration. But then his fingers nimbly undid the button and zipper. With a gentle tug, her jeans were around her knees. Edward ran his finger from her belly button to the top of her panties.

"What—"

Her voice caught in her throat as his finger dipped below the elastic. Her eyes rolled back in her head as his hand moved achingly slow over her skin.

"Bella, do you trust me?"

She opened her eyes and Edward was leaning over top of her. His golden eyes were glowing in the faint light of the room.

"Yes," she whispered without hesitation.

She felt the whisper of fabric as he pulled the jeans completely off of her. His body hovered over hers and she wanted to feel him, all of him, moving against her. Instead, he pulled away from her. As she sat up, she felt his lips brush against the inside of her thigh. She gasped and leaned backwards again, propping herself up on her elbows.

Edward hooked his hands around her knees and pulled her toward him until she felt the edge of the bed under her ass. His fingers shook as he reached for her underwear, and she stilled his hand reluctantly.

"We – you don't have to do this," she said, trying to mask the disappointment in her voice. "It's enough to know you want me."

"My fingers are not shaking because I have doubts," he replied, his breath puffing against her overheated skin. "I believe they call this barely restrained desire, love. I can't _wait_ to taste you."

Edward laid a gentle kiss over her sex, and she cried out. She could feel the soft satin of his lips on her and the tingling coolness of his breath against her overheated center. He reached up, grabbing the elastic band of her panties and pulled them down as she lifted her hips for him. She'd never been more anxious or more ready in her life. She thought she might come the moment his mouth touched her. He threw her underwear behind him and turned back to her.

He started slowly, his nose brushing against first one thigh and then the other. His cool breath was sweet torture on her sensitive skin. When his tongue slipped out and brushed against the meeting of her thigh, she balled her fists in the covers and groaned loudly.

Bella felt his lips on the edge of her center, and she moaned, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth as she fought to maintain control. She felt him breathe in deeply and let out a shuddering sigh as his hands moved around her hips. His tongue flattened against her as he licked her, moving slowly through her sex. She heard his growl of desire and it only intensified the pleasure she felt at finally feeling him inside of her.

"Fuck, Bella," he moaned, looking up at her. "You taste exquisite."

His tongue circled the small bundle of nerves and then pressed against it, sending a shockwave of pleasure through her. She squeezed her eyes shut and moved her hand to his hair, meaning to run her fingers gently through it. But when he ran his tongue against her harder, she gripped his hair in her hand tightly and cried out his name.

Edward's hand moved from her hips around to her thigh. As he moved closer to her throbbing center, she made inarticulate noises, begging him for more. He added first one finger and then another, curling his fingers inside her as his tongue began to move more rhythmically. The pleasure coiled within her, and she could feel it building higher and higher as his tongue and fingers moved in tandem.

"Oh! Yes," she cried, his fingers going deeper within her.

Edward's name was on her lips as she came. She felt tremors of pleasure throughout her body as he slowed and brought her down from the high, allowing her to fully ride out her orgasm. He feathered kisses over her thighs and up her stomach as she lay panting on the bed, shockwaves still charging through her blood.

She felt him lie down at her side and opened her eyes. He was staring intently at her, his eyes darker than she'd ever seen them and his lips still glistening from her. He was smiling broadly, and she had to chuckle.

"Don't you look proud of yourself?" she asked, rolling over on her side and rubbing his cheek with her thumb.

"I rather am, actually," he murmured, moving forward and stopping just short of kissing her.

He looked at her questioningly, and she closed the distance between them with a soft moan. His lips and tongue were warm from her heat and tasted of her. It only enhanced their kiss, reminding her of where he had been and what he had done to her. She pushed herself up on still shaky arms and moved over top of him.

Edward's hands settled on her hips, and she straddled his stomach, groaning at the feel of his skin against her center again. He whimpered and kissed her more deeply, tangling his fingers in her hair and pulling her body close to his.

When she pulled back, he eased his hold on her head, and she moved away from him, breathless again.

"I want to try something, too," she whispered, leaning forward and kissing down his neck.

He groaned as she ran her teeth over his collar bone and traveled lower to his chest. She ran her tongue around his nipple, feeling it harden. She pulled back and blew on the wet skin, making Edward hiss and grab at the sheets.

"Bella," he moaned, releasing the sheets and catching her gently under her arms as she moved down his body. "What are you doing?"

She saw his nostrils flare and his eyebrows creased. He wanted her to continue, but he was holding back … again.

"What do you think I'm doing?" she asked, winking at him as a smile quirked her lips.

She ran her fingers down his body, feeling the soft ripples of his muscles tensing under her hands. She reached the waistband of his pants, and she ran her fingers underneath, grabbing it in her hands. Edward sighed heavily and took her wrists in his hands gently.

"This – I didn't come here – you don't have to do this," he finally managed.

She giggled and shook her head.

"I don't think I've ever seen you at a loss for words, Edward," she said.

"Yes, well … you do strange things to me," he said wryly.

"Edward, I want this so badly," she whispered, looking up at him with the waistband of his pants still in her hands. "Let me show you."

Her fingers dipped lower, brushing the head of his erection. He threw his head back, the cords of his neck standing out as he moaned. His hands were still around her wrists, but his grip was loosening. He was so close to letting go, but something still held him back.

"You asked if I trusted you," Bella said, easing off of him and kneeling between his legs on the bed. "Do you trust me?"

He looked back up at her, his face clouded in lust, and he simply nodded. He removed his hands from her wrists and waited.

"Move back," she commanded, with a small smile. "Lean against the pillows."

He scrambled to comply, and she moved with him, her fingers still locked around the waistband of his pants. He sat up, his arm up over his head and his hand wrapped around one of the posts of the bed. The intensity of the desire she saw in his gaze was almost palpable as she moved her fingers to the top button of his jeans. _Button fly_, she thought, smirking. Once the top one was done, she pulled and the rest popped free.

He lifted his hips for her as she eased the pants off of him. Bella ran her hands over the tight blue boxers, just barely grazing his hardness with her fingertips. She watched him intently as she moved. His mouth opened as her fingers played with him, his lips parted in a perfect O, and his eyes closed tightly. She took her fingers away from him, and ran them up and down his thighs, teasing him with varying pressure on his skin. His bottom lip began to tremble softly as she inched closer to him.

When she reached up and pulled at the waistband of his briefs, she saw him twitch in anticipation. He lifted up his hips quickly, and she pulled them off of him, eager to finally see all of him.

Edward was unbelievably perfect, almost too beautiful to look at. His pale, flawless skin covered tightly coiled muscles all over his body. When she rested her eyes on his cock, straining and erect for her, she moaned softly and reached out for him. She brushed the tip with her fingers, watching Edward's reaction.

Bella knew what she wanted; she wanted to settle herself over him, let him fill her completely, and feel him move within her. But she wouldn't push him further than he was comfortable; he'd already said they couldn't make love tonight. Still, she intended to have him inside of her.

She bent forward and licked him from base to tip, following the direct motion with her hand. She heard him bang his head against the headboard of the bed, groaning as she swirled her tongue around the head.

"Fuck, Bella," he whispered reverently.

When she looked up at him, taking him in her mouth, his eyes were open, black discs of desire. The strange purring noise that she heard at the library returned, louder, as she moved her mouth around him, taking as much of him into her mouth as she could.

She held the shaft in her hand, pumping slowly at first so that her fingers met her lips and then moved back down. Bella knew she was going slowly, but she could feel the tension building in him, and she wanted to savor this feeling of her total control over him. As she picked up speed, she saw his hand grip the bed sheets and heard his head thump softly over and over against the headboard.

She could feel it building, and she increased her speed, humming around him. His whole body tensed as he came, and he let out a feral growl. Bella felt him pulse inside of her and tasted him on her tongue. She moaned as she swallowed hard, running her tongue up and down his length as he twitched and was spent.

He tasted … different. Not bad, not wonderful either if she was being honest. But it left the same tingling in her mouth that she felt after he kissed her and that was not entirely unpleasant at all. She felt the strange sensation all through her body after and it left her wanting more. Always more, it seemed.

Bella kissed her way up his body, touching and tasting him as she went, reveling in the freedom of having his whole body at her disposal. When she reached his shoulder, she nuzzled his neck and brought her lips to his ear.

"Now … aren't you glad you trusted me?" she whispered.

He turned to face her slowly and brought his lips to hers, moving gently with her. She was straddling his leg, and he moved her so that she was lying on the bed beside him. He pulled away and ran his fingers over her body, shaking his head as he looked at her.

"How did I ever get so lucky as to deserve a woman like you?" he murmured.

His hand cupped her breast, and he brushed the nipple with his thumb. Her breath caught in her throat, and her eyes closed involuntarily.

"You best settle down if you don't want me to attack you," she said in a strangled voice. When she opened her eyes, he seemed to be regarding her with confusion. "I only have so much control, Edward, and you've damn near driven me wild tonight."

A smile spread across his face, softening his features, and he leaned down, laying his head against her bare chest just over her heart. Bella ran her fingers gently through his hair, slowly coming down from the high of being with him. She started to worry that he would regret it … regret her. His lips began to move against her skin again, making her shiver in delight as he kissed her gently, quickly up her neck and over her cheeks.

"Thank you," he said.

She softly pulled on his hair until his face was level with hers and she could see the almost glowing yellow ring around his pupils.

"Why are you thanking me?" she asked.

"For being with me like that," he whispered. "For convincing me."

"Umm, you're welcome?" she said, her voice trailing off into a laughing question. "Edward, that was amazing. And I totally wanted that. I'm glad you let me convince you."

He chuckled, the vibration sending new and delicious waves of pleasure through her body. Slowly, he lowered his head back to her chest.

"It's getting late," he murmured, his hand still gently cupping her breast. "I should let you get some sleep."

"Stay," she whispered. "Don't leave me yet."

For just a moment, she heard the low growl again and then it was gone. He settled her carefully in his arms, facing away from him and held her wrapped in his embrace.

"I still can't believe you really want me," he said when she was lying comfortably beside him.

"Why is that so hard for you to believe?" she asked, twisting around to look at him.

He sighed and rubbed his nose against her as he shook his head back and forth.

"When we were at the library … you found something in the letters that gave you pause, didn't you?" he asked finally.

She thought back over the letters, the many mentions of the vampire legends and the nagging unanswered questions that kept cropping up about who or what Edward really was. She wouldn't wager a guess yet, not until she was completely sure. The reason she wanted to go back to the Cambridge Library tomorrow, and the reason she was glad that she'd be alone, was because she wanted to look further into the legends mentioned in the letters. She wanted to see if they matched up with some of the anomalies she'd seen in the Bode's letters … and with some of the things she'd noticed about Edward over the past week.

"Bella, is there something you want to tell me?" he pressed, his eyes wide and open.

She shook her head slowly.

"No," she said softly. "I saw things that I want to look at further, but nothing I'm ready to share … yet."

He sighed again and burrowed his face in her hair. She recognized the sigh as that of exasperation and had to giggle.

"Are you getting … impatient, my sweet?" she asked playfully.

She felt him smile against her back at her spontaneous term of endearment. She made a mental note to use it more.

"Perhaps," he said. "Perhaps a little anxious as well."

"When will you believe me that _nothing_ will make me leave you?" she asked, her voice betraying a bit of her exasperation.

He was silent for some time, and she wondered if he'd drifted off. He'd never fallen asleep before her in the past. _But then again,_ she thought, _we've never given each other mind-blowing orgasms before._ She stifled a chuckle at her silliness just as she felt him move behind her.

"I believe you," he said quietly. "But I will be _satisfied_ only when forever and forever have played themselves out and you are still by my side."

Bella felt the flutter of butterfly wings in her stomach at his words. _Forever … and forever,_ she thought. The question that troubled her as she pondered over the letters returned to her. _What _was_ Edward? _And, a new question added itself to the mix: _Just how long was forever to a being like him?_

The concept of being frightened or repelled by the thought that Edward was something _other_ never even occurred to her. Edward simply was, and she would take him however he was.

* * *

_**A/N**__: Very possibly the smuttiest thing I've ever written. Happy Monday. Lol. Anyway, I think it's pretty clear how close she is to figuring this out and what her response will eventually be. Yes, she's a little freaked at the many possibilities that are out there, but she sees them and she isn't dismissing them outright. Really, she only needs a few more clues to piece it all together. Now, to make sure Edward doesn't fuck it up when she _does_ guess, right? Silly, emo vampire. ;) Hope you enjoyed the smuttiness! Pretty sure they both needed that. ~Jen_


	11. The Woods are Lovely, Dark, and Deep

_I was born in the arms of imaginary friends_

_Free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I've been_

_Then you come on crashing in_

_Like the realest thing_

_Trying my best to understand_

_All that your love can bring._

_**Half of My Heart**__, John Mayer 2009_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own them; I just play with them. No copying. Yadda, yadda, yadda._

_Many thanks to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs for beta-ing this as well as holding my hand through the writing stage. They are some pretty awesome women._

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* * *

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Edward wanted to spend the night watching Bella sleep in his arms, her naked body pressed against his in blissful happiness. He wanted to; but he couldn't. He was thirsty, unreasonably so for having drained three deer the night before they arrived in Cambridge, and he needed to hunt. As he slipped his arm out from under her head, she sighed.

"Edward," she murmured, a faint smile playing on her lips.

His dead heart swelled in his chest at the mention of his name. He slipped his jeans back on and bent over her, caressing her hair with his fingers.

"Sleep well, my love," Edward whispered.

He turned away before the draw of her brought him back to her side. For her well-being as much as his own, he would need to visit the forest. He could be back by her side before she awoke, and she would never know the difference.

_At least not tonight_, his subconscious taunted him.

Bella was so close to figuring everything out. Edward thought she had it when she deciphered the words _vampiro leggende_ the night before in the library. He had watched her dark eyes squint in concentration, and he could almost hear the puzzle pieces clicking into place. For a moment, he had forgotten about the fear of her discovery; he simply wanted a glimpse into her amazing mind to see the way it catalogued the scraps of evidence.

He closed the door silently and walked through the hallways of the hotel, ignoring the thoughts and dreams that drifted out to him. Once he had made it out of the city and was certain he was alone, he let his speed burst forth and ran with abandon through the forest.

Edward was exhilarated, full of energy and life. Bella had done that to him, and he knew without a doubt that after their night together, he would never be whole without her. It was so simple really, the connection that they felt to each other. Still, it was difficult for him to accept that she needed _him_. She deserved the sun and everything that was good; whatever did she want with a creature who haunted the night?

He fell upon the first deer that he found, biting into her savagely and drinking her blood greedily. It was hot and slaked the burn in his throat only minimally, but it was something. After Bella had fallen asleep and the afterglow of their time together had settled, he'd become painfully aware of the burn in his throat. It was scorching, almost as painful as it had been in his first year. The fact that he hadn't noticed it at all while he was with Bella didn't escape him. It emboldened him slightly, knowing that he could be with her intimately without the thirst overtaking him.

Whether or not it was foremost in his mind during the act, it was still there. Always, her blood and the effect it had on him would be there. _Unless_ …

Edward shook his head and buried his kill quickly. He then took off through the night in search of more. After two deer and a small fox, Edward felt overly full. He took care of the carcasses and leaned against a tree, trying to think through what the day ahead would hold for him.

Bella wanted to go back to the artifact annex the next day. Once there, she'd pour over the letters again, follow the clues to the occult section, and she'd make the connection. It was all there, she was just too grounded in her concept of reality to let herself believe what she was seeing. He needed Alice.

Almost as soon as he thought about her, he could hear her in his mind. She was already on her way, of course, having seen that he would need her. Her gift could be as useful as it was annoying, at times.

"Well," she murmured as she approached him, "don't you look relaxed, Edward?"

He rolled his eyes at her and dismissed her implication.

"Having a good evening, Alice?" he asked.

_Not as good as yours_, she sang in his head and chuckled. "Yes, it's been pleasant. I saw that you'd need me. I assume it's about Bella figuring it all out tomorrow."

"So she will?"

"Of course she will, you ninny."

"Tsk, tsk," Edward said with a smile, "with the names, little sister."

"She's possibly the smartest human I've ever encountered and everything's laid out in front of her. In fact …" Alice paused and her eyes blanked for just a second before she looked back at him with a smile. "Yes, she's going to find a document tomorrow that will put everything in place for her."

Edward saw a flash of the paper in her mind, but it was too brief for him to recognize it.

"What document? Where? One of the letters?"

"No … this is something different." She paused again, searching, and then shook her head. "I've never seen it before, but it looks to be written in English and …"

Alice gasped and looked at Edward.

_You wrote on it,_ she thought. She showed him the document she saw in his mind and Edward frowned and nodded.

"I came across that article about a hundred years ago. It was written by an … industrious human who had uncovered many of our secrets. At first, I thought it might be a trick of Aro's to lure us out of hiding, making us think that people were close to uncovering our secret, but it turned out to actually be the work of a curious human. I made notations, sent it to Carlisle … we never found out who the writer was. I haven't thought about the text of that paper in decades."

_But you agree that it sort of spells it out for her,_ Alice thought gently.

"Yes, it doesn't leave much to the imagination," Edward mumbled. "Where the devil will she find the blasted thing?"

Alice showed him the book she would take it out of, a Hungarian occult text neither of them recognized. _How did it get out of Carlisle's possession?_

"I haven't a clue, Alice. But that _is_ an intriguing question. For all we know, Carlisle left it there himself."

Alice's face brightened.

"Maybe he's trying to contact us!" she said brightly.

Edward shook his head distractedly.

"We know they don't remember us, Alice. If Carlisle left the leaflet in the book, there had to be some other reason for it. Perhaps he was on orders from Aro … but what?"

Edward sighed in frustration and looked around the forest, running through possibilities in his mind. The Volturi leader wanted him and Alice, of that he was certain. He already knew that the wily vampire would stop at nothing to attain the prize of a mind-reader and a psychic. But what would he gain from hiding material as sensitive as that in a book that any human could pick up? It didn't make sense.

While he ran through the possibilities, his mind kept returning to the certainty of Bella learning his true nature the next day. It filled him with equal parts fear and hope. Alice flitted around in front of him and had her hands on her hips in a reproving stance.

_You're second guessing her_, she accused.

"Alice, it's only reasonable for me to prepare myself for the eventuality that she'll leave. She's going to read documents that prove she been …"

_Sucking off a vampire?_ Alice finished in his mind.

Edward growled in warning at her, but she only laughed at him, knowing that he was no threat to her.

"Don't be so crass," Edward chided her stiffly.

Alice only laughed harder and then shook her head.

"Edward, I'm happy for you, but you need to give yourself a break here. Yes, you're a vampire. But truly, it won't change how she feels about you. Every possible future I see for her includes you … and vice versa."

Edward sighed deeply and couldn't help the smile that crossed his face at her words.

"Nothing like the guarantee of a psychic," he mused.

Alice reached up to ruffle his hair playfully, but he caught her wrist in his hand and held his finger to his lips. He'd heard a voice in his head, an immortal voice, and it was getting closer to them.

_What is it?_ Alice clamored in his head. _Oh, God, is it them?_

Edward shook his head once and mouthed the words _one female_ to her. He didn't recognize the voice immediately, but he heard Aro's name and knew that whoever was searching for them came from him.

_Edward!_ Alice cried in his head. _Why didn't I _see_ this?_

Somehow, Aro had managed to get around Alice's gift. The thought was terrifying. The two siblings, who had spent the better part of three centuries together, sniffed the air in unison and took off in opposite directions. Edward flew through the forest, taking in his surroundings and listening carefully to Alice's voice as she catalogued what she was seeing.

They were closing in on her. Edward still couldn't identify the voice of the vampire, and assumed that whoever it was must have joined Aro's coven after their last brush with them, some twenty years ago. Alice was turning toward the visitor, and Edward turned as well. When he entered the clearing where the visitor had been sniffing the air, his sister already had the small vampire pinned to the ground, her teeth at her neck.

"Hello, Renata," Edward said smoothly, having picked her name from her brain. "If my sister lets you up, will you try to run away?"

She hissed at Edward, baring her teeth. Alice rolled with her and slammed her body into the ground, shaking the forest floor around them.

"Answer my brother nicely. I have no patience for those that smell of the Volturi."

Alice's voice was a guttural snarl, so different from her normal, sweet speaking voice. Still, the female lay silent on the ground.

"You should listen to her," Edward said, darting over and crouching by her side. "The Volturi stole her mate; she'd _love_ to thin their numbers."

"Yes, the empath," the woman said, looking haughtily at Alice. "He's quite popular among the females."

Edward grabbed Alice as her keening wail began and threw her off of the intruder just before she could sink her teeth into the woman's neck. He grabbed Renata as she tried to get up and pinned her against a nearby tree, his teeth inches from her neck.

"I should take your arm for that," he hissed in her ear.

_I'm sorry, Edward_, Alice thought from her perch in a nearby tree.

Edward didn't dignify the apology with a response. Alice had nothing to be sorry for, but Renata soon might.

"Why are you here?" he snarled.

"Why do you think?" Renata spat back. "They said you were smart."

"My answer remains the same, Renata. I will not join your ranks. I think you know my sister's answer as well."

Alice's growl curled through the darkness, and Edward punctuated it by slamming Renata even harder against the tree.

"Even to save your little pet?" she asked, turning her blood red eyes up to look into Edward's. "Master said I could have the tasty human if you refused …"

Her voice was cut off when Edward flung her to the ground and landed on top of her. He grabbed her head in his hands and twisted, wrapping his arm around her neck. He held her like that, the cords in her neck straining. Her eyes darted around the clearing frantically.

"You don't want to do that," she hissed with the last of her air. "If I don't come back, the whole guard will come down on you."

He loosened his hold on her neck, just enough for her to breathe more freely.

"Why are you here?" Edward growled.

"You already know. Aro wants you and your sister. He's willing to offer a trade: the human's life for your service. It's really a rather good offer if you ask me."

"I didn't." Edward flipped her over and held her shoulders pinned to the ground with his hands. "You won't have Bella."

"Aww. It has a name."

Without a thought, he drew his hand back and slapped her hard across the face, cracking the stony veneer of her skin. She cried out in pain and looked up at him with more fear in her eyes than she had before, even when he held her head in his hands. He'd now made it abundantly clear that he would hurt her.

"You're lying." Edward's voice was a soft sing-song as he shook his head slowly back and forth. "Aro didn't even send you himself. He couldn't, because Alice would have seen that. She's watching him, and he knows it. How did you come to be here?"

The woman's chin rose up defiantly, and she closed her eyes, thinking that it would block Edward's gift. He chuckled softly and saw the note in her mind, the one Aro had written and left by chance near his bedside table.

"So you've been sharing your master's bed then, Renata," he mused with a smirk. "Naughty."

Renata's eyes flew open wide and with a burst of energy, she threw Edward off of her. He was up and out of the way before she could grab hold of him, and Alice jumped into the fray, grabbing Renata's arms. She held the hissing and spitting vampire just out of Edward's reach, and he circled her, watching her fit.

"You know _nothing_ about my master. You know _nothing_ about me."

"I know _everything_," Edward whispered, coming around in front of her, "because you showed me."

He tapped her forehead, harder than was necessary.

"It's all right there," he added. He looked up at Alice who was still holding Renata's arms. "He must have left a note about us, knowing she'd pick it up and be eager to take care of his issues."

"But if he made a decision to send someone here, even without saying it out loud, I would have seen it," Alice insisted.

"That's where his genius lies," Edward said, standing upright. "He never asked you to come, even in the note, did he, Renata?"

"It was clear enough," she hissed. "He wrote about wanting you and the things he'd already taken from you. Your family … her mate."

Alice hissed lowly at the mention of Jasper, but made no comment.

"I only had to put the pieces together to figure out what he wanted. And that's why I came."

"He used you, dear-heart," Edward said in a soft, sweet voice. "He never promised to come after you if you didn't come back, did he?"

"He would! He can't live without me! I'm his …"

"He has dozens of protectors. I'll wager that Jane is worth three of you. You're … expendable. That's why the note was left for you."

_Now?_ Alice asked calmly in his head.

Edward's eyes flashed up to his sister's, and he nodded. She pulled the vampire's arms back and placed her tiny, high-heel clad foot in the small of Renata's back, forcing her to the ground. Renata lay prone before Edward, her arms straining behind her.

"Now, about my … human," Edward said, crouching down beside Renata. "We've established your expendability. And you've clearly done your homework, understanding how important she is to me. We wouldn't want anything to happen to that pretty little head of yours, now would we?"

Renata's eyes flashed open wide as Edward ran his finger around her throat.

"I know your scent now," he growled, his voice rising. "And I know your mind … you're not safe anywhere in this city. You will go, or I will find you and end you myself. Is that clear?"

"I'm – a shield. You can't find me …"

"Yes," he hissed. "I can. And if I smell you near Bella, I won't rest until you're little more than purple ash."

Her bottom lip quivered as she weighed Edward's sneer. There was not an ounce of indecision in his face. It was clear to her that he would know her decision and were he unhappy with it, he would dismember her on the spot.

"Now you begin to see," he said, standing up. "Do I have your word that you will return to Volterra tonight?"

Her red eyes dropped in defeat. _Yes,_ she thought. _You have my word_.

"You can drop her, Alice," he said quickly.

With a final tug on her arms, Alice let Renata's body flop to the ground and came around in front of her to stand beside her brother.

"She won't be back," Alice said with finality.

"Oh, I know," Edward said with a smirk.

Renata got slowly to her feet and stared the two siblings in the eye, her haughtiness returning.

"I might not be back, but you can be sure my master will get what he wants. Aro _always_ gets what he wants."

Alice's eyes clouded over for a moment and then she looked calmly back at Renata.

"You should hurry," she said softly, with a smirk. "While you were gone, someone else has been sharing his bed."

Renata's face broke into a comical mask of surprise.

"Oh, and Renata?" Alice called as the woman turned. "If I smell you on my mate when he returns to my side, even my brother won't be able to keep me from tearing your head off."

The small Volturi vampire squinted her eyes at Alice, but when Alice crouched defensively and snarled at her, she drew back. She threw her arms up and it seemed to Edward and Alice as though a black cloak had fallen around her. They felt the whoosh of air that signaled her disappearance from the clearing.

"I can still hear her," Edward said.

"Interesting gift," Alice said. "So it's not a mental shield? It's some sort of physical block?"

"She can likely deflect people away from her if she has enough warning, but she's obviously not that powerful. If she were a truly impenetrable shield, she could have evaded us when we approached her in the forest."

"Still … this is bloody rotten luck, Edward," Alice said with a frown. "They aren't going to be happy with her when she returns, but the information she's going to pass on about Bella is going to be useful to them."

Edward growled and clenched his hands, his nostrils flaring. He was staring out into the forest as though looking for threats. Alice touched his arm gently.

"They aren't coming now," she said.

He relaxed minutely and looked back at her with pleading in his eyes.

_I understand_, she thought. _You know how much I understand. We'll keep her safe._

"She shouldn't even be on their radar," he said through tight lips. "This is all my fault."

"No," Alice snarled and grabbed him by both shoulders. "You will _not_ do this. You and Bella are together; you've made that abundantly clear tonight. Don't you dare blame yourself and pull away from her now. Look!"

Alice closed her eyes and focused on the future if Edward were to abandon Bella. She would throw herself into research, and she would find out the truth. Then … she would go looking for him.

"She'd be in more danger that way, Edward," Alice said seriously. "There's only one way you can keep her safe."

Alice's face calmed as the future settled into place.

"That's better," she said. "Don't fuck this up, brother. Your mate is counting on you."

Edward frowned in determination as he thought about the next day. He hadn't been lying to Bella; he did have business to attend to in the city of Cambridge. He was to meet with a rare book dealer regarding a set of journals he was interested in. They had belonged to Carlisle, but the man he was meeting with didn't know their true value.

He needed to ensure that Bella remained in the library the entire day. He'd need to set up some sort of diversion for her, something that would trip her up in her research just enough that she wouldn't be able to leave early.

"Mike Newton," he said sourly. "Go to Oxford and get him on a train to Cambridge so that he is in the clean room when Bella arrives."

"You know he'll hit on her," Alice said, frowning.

"Yes, and it will piss her off greatly," he said, chuckling. "She dislikes roadblocks in her research. But she's just too good. If left to her own devices, she could be out of there before lunch. I'll be busy with the book dealer until at least four."

"That'll be best," Alice said, looking quickly into the future. "I can cover the library without a problem, but keeping her surrounded by humans, at least until she's fully aware of the situation, is the best idea."

Scenarios began to spin out in Alice's mind as she spiraled through the possibilities. Edward watched with her, seeing his future and Bella's play out in Alice's mind.

"What was that?" he asked, grabbing her hand.

"A … possibility," she said slowly. "A likely one."

The vision stretched out in front of Edward and he watched with growing fascination as it played in his mind. Bella – snowy white with blood red eyes, crouching protectively over a deer she brought down. Bella – smooth, hard skin and razor sharp teeth, lips bared in a warning growl at an intruder. Bella – laughing, head thrown back and brown hair billowing in the wind as Edward swung her round in circles, her diamond skin throwing glittering rainbows in the air. Bella and Edward entwined beneath a stormy sky …

"Sorry," Alice said with an impish grin. "I didn't really want to see that any more than you _wanted_ me to see it."

Edward was speechless.

"It – she – would _want_ that?"

"Clearly it's a possibility," Alice replied slowly. "You understand for me to even see that, she has to have thought about it herself. Not with all the details, of course, but the possibility of becoming … like you."

Edward nodded mutely.

_Oh, Edward, don't dismiss it_, she pleaded with him in his mind.

"I'm not," he murmured. "I'm just stunned. It's rare, Alice. Give me a moment."

She chuckled.

_You're not wrong for wanting it, brother._

"It feels wrong," he replied. "None of us really wanted this life. It seems wrong to want it for her."

"You would never take her humanity without her consent," Alice said with certainty. "But if it's her wish as well as yours, you shouldn't dismiss it."

Edward shrugged and turned away from her.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," he said finally. "It seems rather certain that we will."

"Go back to her," Alice said, touching his shoulder. "You're missing her already."

Edward heard the hurt in her voice; he saw the memory of Jasper walking away from her so raw in her mind that he could feel her pain with her. He sighed heavily and turned around, pulling her into his arms.

"I'm so sorry, Alice," he whispered, his voice raw.

_I'll never believe that he's really gone, not for good,_ she thought. _It's just not possible_.

"We'll get them back," Edward promised, as he had so many times before.

Alice nodded, but he heard her repeating Renata's words in her mind like a keening bell. _The run to Oxford and back will do me good tonight_, she thought with a laugh. _Save me from chasing her down and tearing her to shreds_.

"I believe I'd like to see that, little sister," Edward said seriously.

"You just might," she whispered. "Someday…"

* * *

Edward closed the door silently behind him as he entered the room and sighed in satisfaction when he saw Bella lying in the bed, still sleeping. He made no sound as he slipped out of his shoes and clothes and joined her under the covers.

The feel of her body was like a torch next to his skin, setting him ablaze with a single touch. She shivered in her sleep, but instead of moving away from him, she nestled closer. When she sighed and situated herself in his arms, Edward knew with certainty that Bella would always be his home.

* * *

_**A/N**__: And the drama ignites! I know most of you were expecting a chapter with Bella in the library; but this chapter was important in bringing things together more fully. We always knew that the Volturi wouldn't be far away. As you can see, the vampire's gifts have been … tweaked. Renata's shield ability is different here than it was in canon. There will be other changes. And expect a few original characters to be thrown into the fray as well. ;) This is a fairly heavy chapter, but it opens up the story quite a bit. After Bella knows the score, Edward and Alice will have a lot of explaining to do, to her and to you readers. You'll get a much clearer picture of their past and what they are fighting against (or for, depending on your outlook). I hope you are continuing to enjoy the mystery. What are your thoughts before Edward and Alice reveal everything about their past? Guesses? Conjectures? Pray, do tell! ;) ~Jen_


	12. Conclusions

_And root to root and tip to tip_

_I look at him my country gip_

_Let it up I own his fears_

_But someone brought you close to tears._

_Many trains and many miles_

_Like you to me on the sunny isle_

_What of which you wish to speak_

_Have you come here to rescue me?_

_**Devil's Spoke**__, Laura Marling 2010_

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own them; I just play with them._

_Many things to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs for their help in putting this story together. Special thanks to freesiaandlilacs and Camilla10 for their help with the Hungarian and Italian translations in this chapter._

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Bella woke to the smell of coffee and the sound of Edward calling her name. Before opening her eyes, she breathed in deeply, letting the scent of him surround her fully. He was everywhere, on the sheets and on her body. He'd been hers last night.

"I do know you're awake." His voice drifted over to her from across the room, and she slowly opened her eyes.

"You brought coffee," she whispered, her voice still thick from sleep.

"It's just from the lobby, but I believe it's how you like it," he said, getting up from the chair he was sitting in.

Edward had been to his room already, having changed clothes from the previous night. The Kelly green sweater he was wearing was striking next to his bronze hair. He was wearing khakis, unusual for him on a normal business day; Edward seemed most comfortable in jeans.

"Who are you meeting today?" she asked, sitting up with the covers drawn around her.

"A rare books collector," he answered, perching on the edge of the bed. "He has a collection of journals I'm interested in.

"From the same family we've been studying?" Bella asked, immediately waking up and taking interested.

He paused, seeming to weigh his answer before proceeding.

"Yes," he said slowly, "but he doesn't know how important they are. He thinks they are just random journals; I believe them to be from the patriarch of the family we're studying."

"You believe them to be … or you know them to be?" Bella asked, looking pointedly away from Edward's eyes.

Edward sighed and handed her the still steaming cup of coffee.

"I know," he replied tersely. "No, I won't tell you how. Not yet."

"I didn't ask."

She took the coffee and let the covers drop, slipping out of bed. As she brought the cup to her lips, she heard Edward draw in an unsteady breath. She smiled around the edges of the cup as she walked toward the bathroom.

"Just a quick shower and change of clothes, and then I'll be ready to go," she said airily.

"Actually, I'm going to have to leave now," Edward said as she stepped into the bathroom. "I'm sorry, but it's unavoidable. There will be a car waiting to take you to the library."

She turned and faced him with a surprised look on her face.

"You're in a hurry?" she asked, unable to keep her disappointment out of her voice.

"I let you sleep in," he explained. "I wanted you to be well rested for your research today."

Bella narrowed her eyes.

"What time _is_ it?"

"Nearly 10:30."

"Dammit, Edward!" she exclaimed, putting the coffee down and beginning to move quickly around the room. "I wanted to be done with this by lunchtime so I could get in some sightseeing. I've wasted the whole morning now!"

The color had risen in her face as she moved quickly around the room. Edward rested his ankle on the opposite knee and leaned forward to watch her with a smirk on his face.

"I don't know what you're smiling about," she said through thin lips. "You're in big trouble."

"You're sexy when you're angry," he purred.

Bella froze and turned around, squinting her eyes at him.

"If you think that distracting me will get you off the hook, you are sorely mistaken, Mr. Masen."

"I don't," he said, standing up. "But you are. Sexy, you know?"

Bella felt her pulse quicken as his eyes swept over her, his head moving slowly back and forth. She sighed and crossed her arms in front of her.

"It helps that I'm walking around naked, right?"

"It … adds to the whole picture, but really it's you, love."

She frowned and shook her head at him.

"You're forgiven." Her voice was still tight. Clipped.

Edward chuckled and walked over to her, pulling her into his arms.

"The tone of your voice doesn't make it _sound_ as though I'm forgiven," he murmured, leaning down and pressing his lips against her hair.

"No, but you are," she said, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I don't think I _can_ stay angry with you. Anyway, go. Will I see you tonight?"

"Most definitely. I'll pick you up from the library myself. There's … someplace special I'd like to take you."

With a quick kiss on her forehead, he pulled away. He gave her a lingering look and then turned toward the door.

"Edward," she called, reaching out for him and then letting her hand drop.

"Yes?"

"I'll – miss you," she said softly.

He smiled radiantly.

"Thank you for that," he said. "I'll miss you as well."

* * *

Bella strolled into the library just before noon, having asked the driver to stop on the way so she could grab a quick bite of fish and chips. She entered the building, now lit up and bustling with activity. It seemed dim compared to the outside. Bella's eyes were drawn to the corner of the library where Edward had taken her last night, and she involuntarily blushed and smiled. She felt the warmth spreading through her body at the memory. After running her hand surreptitiously against the wall, she walked up the stairs to the second floor clean room.

As she entered the room, adjusting her cotton gloves, she was surprised to see someone already bent over the table.

"I'm sorry," she said in a low voice. "I didn't know anyone else would be here today."

"Oh!" the young man exclaimed, turning around quickly with a deepening blush on his face. "Dr. Swan. So good to see you again."

Bella's eyes widened and then narrowed again as she placed the young man's face. It was the young history major from the Bode.

"Mike, right?" Bella asked, closing the distance between them.

He reached out his gloved hand and she took it, hiding her distaste at the sticky warmth that she felt through the cotton. His cheeks were blazing as he tried to keep his eyes focused on her eyes, not her chest. As he lost the battle yet again, Bella rolled her eyes and snatched her hand back.

"So," Mike said, stepping a little closer to her, "what can I do you for?"

Bella shook her head in irritation and moved past him to the table.

"I don't understand why you're here," Bella said. "Ed . . . rather, Mr. Masen didn't mention that you would be traveling from Oxford."

Bella smiled when her intentional misstep over Edward's name had Mike looking downcast and dejected. She hoped it would help him keep his eyes – and hands – where they belonged.

"Yeah," he said slowly. "I wasn't expecting to be here either, but a Ms. Brandon showed up at my door early this morning with tickets, breakfast, and a smile. Said you'd need my help, so … here I am."

He finished with a flare of his hands, but Bella just shook her head and looked away, trying to hide her annoyance. The boy was inept at handling documents, and it was clear from his demeanor that he harbored some sort of feelings for her. This was not the distraction she needed having already gotten a late start to the day.

When Bella looked over the haphazard array of papers on the table, out of order from how she'd left it the night before, she slammed her hand on the table in frustration. If it had just been a matter of the documents, she probably wouldn't have been so upset, but she felt so close to unlocking the mystery of Edward; she didn't want to have to back track.

"Dr. Swan?"

Mike's hesitant voice made her look up and sigh.

"What can I do to help?" he asked.

Bella slowly smiled as she thought over how to handle the situation. There was data that she needed; perhaps Mike could be her gopher for the afternoon.

"I need some information on the likelihood of a family relocating to England from Italy between the years 1450 to 1550," she said quickly, walking back and forth in front of the table in her growing excitement. "I want to know what financial means they would need to be able to afford that kind of trip and most importantly, I want to know if it was a common occurrence or if, as I suspect, it was rather uncommon. Also, I need several references for the term _Stregoni Benefici. _It's an Italian term mentioned in one of the letters. Can you find those things out for me?"

Mike's blue eyes looked wide and shocked, but he was nodding as he wrote down her request.

"Yeah, absolutely, Dr. Swan," he said, continuing to nod. "But it might take me a while."

"That's fine," Bella crooned with a smile. "Why don't you get yourself some lunch before getting to work? You look famished."

His eyes lit up at the mention of food, and Bella internally congratulated herself. He'd be out of her hair for the next several hours.

"So, I'll just … bring the research here?" he asked.

"I'll likely be in the occult section of the library by the time you're done," she said airily.

"Occult? Like witches?"

Bella opened her mouth and then snapped it shut quickly, stopping herself from saying the word which was on the tip of her tongue.

"Yeah," she replied slowly. "Just like that."

"Okay, Dr. Swan. If you're not here, I'll find you there."

Mike turned and walked out the door, allowing her to breathe a deep sigh of relief. If there was any chance that Edward's secrets were connected to vampire legends, Bella understood that it would be dangerous to put the notion into anyone else's head. Better not to mention the word at all.

Bella bent over the letters and quickly rearranged them into the order that she had them in the night before. She carefully pulled out the letter she wished to examine, the one with the mention of _la leggenda del vampiro_. The text of the letter was oddly worded, circular in its phrasing, as though the writer was trying to impart a meaning he couldn't say outright.

Unlike some of the other letters, this one had a short salutation at the top. It said simply, _My Son_. Bella wondered why this letter would be addressed so personally when the others seemed to forgo salutation completely. She made a notation in her book and moved down into the body of the letter.

The writer of the letter felt threatened by a prior letter, one which spoke of removing the son from the household. Perhaps another family sought to enter into a marriage agreement, one that would take the son away from the family lands? That didn't make sense, however. The writer sounded … fearful. What's more, the writer seemed to be worried that someone would intercept his letter to his son.

_Why would anyone dangerous be interested in a family's correspondence?_ Bella thought crossly. By all accounts, the family was quietly living in the British countryside doing farming work and hunting small game in the nearby forest. They shouldn't be on anyone's radar, let alone in any danger from some powerful, unknown force.

_And then there's the references to vampires_ …

When Bella had looked at the passage last night, she'd been tired and only given it a cursory glance. Even then, it had sent chills down her back at how cavalierly the writer spoke of vampire legends. As she examined the writing more carefully, she found _more_ reasons for her dark suspicions.

The writer shifted into Italian for the passage about vampires. Bella was more than capable of deciphering words in Italian, but her pronouns and articles often got confused. The writer seemed to feel that there was some danger _di essere scoperti_, or discovery, because _gli esseri umani_, or the humans, were getting close to _il segreto_, or the secret.

There was no way around the fact that the writer seemed to talk about "humans" as separate from himself. The thought both intrigued and frightened Bella. Vampires were the stuff of legend and nightmares; Bella had difficulty thinking of them as a part of her world. However, she knew better than to rule it out. It would have been more comfortable to dismiss it, but she knew that doing so could thwart her efforts to uncover Edward's secret. She'd resigned herself to the possibility that his true nature likely lay somewhere well outside her comfort range. She needed to resist the urge to focus on comfort and delve into the unknown. It was the only way to find the truth.

After placing the letters back in their repository, Bella gathered her notes and headed out to the stacks. The library had an extensive occult section, rivaling most collections in England, so she knew that she would find everything she needed. Cringing only slightly, she typed the words "vampire legends" into Newton, the library's catalog, and waited for the data to collate. She was inundated with information.

She narrowed her search several times until she had a list of seven books that looked promising to her. The first one predated the letters by nearly four hundred years, but the database claimed it was the first mention of the vampire-like beings in England. Bella needed to investigate. She found several other books and documents that looked promising, all with either evidence of vampiric activity on the continent or with pertinent folklore. She added as an afterthought a Hungarian text written in the 1800's titled _Vámpírok vadászata_, or _Hunting Vampires._ She threw a Hungarian to English dictionary on top of her pile and sat down to work in one of the cloistered study carrels in the occult section.

There was literally a glut of information about the many definitions of vampirism. There seemed to be hundreds of different ways to tell if a dearly departed relative had joined the ranks of the undead. If holes appeared in the soil above a grave, a vampire lay beneath. If a corpse didn't decay in the usual manner, it was a vampire. If blood appeared at the corners of a corpse's mouth, it was because it had been sucking blood and therefore … a vampire. Many of these "mysterious circumstances" were easily explained away by modern science, but not all of them. As with many folklores, Bella could see behind the primal fear to a root cause that might have provoked the fantastic tales.

The Hungarian text was a hefty volume of dusty pages which appeared not to have been disturbed in many decades. The cover was dry, brittle to the touch, and Bella handled it with care. As she laid it on the table, she noticed that there appeared to be something tucked within the pages of the book.

She opened it gingerly and found some papers within that were nearly crumbling with age. Printed on parchment paper, the way one might print a pamphlet to distribute to large numbers of people, the text was faint and difficult to read. Bella was ready to put the stray pieces of paper to the side, when something in the margin caught her eye. There was writing on the article … writing that Bella recognized. The same person marked up this article who had written some of the letters she had examined.

Looking more carefully at it, Bella realized that the whole pamphlet and the notations in the margins were written in English. This, in and of itself, was surprising. She had been expecting it to be in Hungarian like the book she had found it in. Judging by the spellings and grammar of both, she guessed that it was written around the same time as the publication of the book. The notations appeared to be made concurrently, but she couldn't be positive. There was likely so little time differential that she would never know how soon after publication her mysterious letter writer had gotten hold of the pamphlet.

Bella doubted that it had been stored within the book for much longer than ten to fifteen years. Even the less than ideal conditions of the book would have kept it in better condition than it appeared to be in. The pamphlet looked as though it had been through years of misuse and poor storage.

Bella's heart fluttered as she reached into her back pocket for her white gloves and her magnifying glasses. The writing in the margins was definitely the same flowing script that she had seen in some of the letters. She recognized the flourishes, especially on the capital Es and Ms. For the first time, she allowed herself to think of the significance of those letters. She knew from her first year class in document studies that people flourished the upper case letters of their names more than any other letter. She knew a person with the initials EM, but it was impossible for _her_ EM to have written something in the 1800s … wasn't it?

Bella shivered and turned back to the document. She decided to ignore the notations and focus solely on the printed text. The title really told the whole story about what Bella could expect to find within the body of the pamphlet: _A Tretisse on the Exisstanse of Vampyres ~ On How to Kno Them._ She expected to find much of the same information she had found in the volumes of folklore, but she was surprised at what she _did_ find.

_Vampyres do exist. It is simply a matter of recognizing the differences between __**them**__ and __**us**__. Despite the monsters' powers of deception and their ability avoid detection, humans ought to be able to recognize one of the demons if they were only to look for these simple signs._

_Pale, icy skin, like the touch of a cadaver. The skin is harder than rock, impenetrable. Wooden stakes or pitchforks would be completely useless against these creatures_

_The blood from their prey swims within their irises and serves as a gauge to their hunger. The blacker they are, the hungrier the monster._

_Incredible strength, incredible speed, though if you are privy to a show of either of these, you are likely headed to an untimely demise._

_They are honed for the kill, attuned to their prey. Everything about them invites us, their prey, in. From their intoxicating smell to their perfected bodies and faces, they are nearly irresistible to humans. It is that which lures us to our deaths._

_Garlic, holy water, crosses … none of these things are effective against the creatures. The sun does not burn them though they seem avoid it at all costs._

_They cannot be destroyed._

Bella blinked several times before shaking her head. If it had just been the pamphlet, she could have brushed it aside. The words seemed to be was written by a fanatic intent on convincing the world of the existence of vampires. However, the notations in the margins chilled Bella to the bone. Whoever had marked it up gave plenty of credence to the ranting. The writer seemed to have a vested interest in proving the author of the article to be a quack. Several of the notations talked about what "we" should do to avoid "their" notice, almost as if the writer himself considered himself … a vampire.

Bella had never been comfortable with superstitions. If she couldn't examine it with her magnifying glass and cross reference it in a few reputable books, she was content to chalk it up as hogwash. However, something about this pamphlet and the vehemence with which the mystery annotator tried to prove it wrong made Bella's skin crawl. Also, despite the almost choking warmth of the stacks, Bella felt cold. She was trying to ignore it, but the pamphlet spelled out something she didn't want to read. She recognized nearly all of the characteristics listed within the treatise.

_Pale, icy skin_ reminded her of the way Edward's cold fingers had felt on her overheated skin every time he touched her. She hadn't thought much about how hard his skin was; in fact she had always been comfortable in his embrace, even as she slept. But thinking back to their night together, she remembered running her fingers along his chest, scraping against his collarbone with her teeth, and gaining no purchase in his flesh. It was as if she were running her fingers against stone … silky smooth stone, but _granite_ nonetheless.

Bella certainly couldn't deny that everything about him drew her in. It was as if someone had set about making the perfect man for her and then put him in her path. Built, but not bulging; messy, careless hair of the perfect shade; penetrating eyes; perfect wit; caring to a fault. Even his _smell_ drew her in. Bella remembered the night before how she had felt almost high on the minty chill of his breath on her face. She had thought it was just an overload of Edward, but now … she wondered if it was part of his _lures_.

Edward's eyes, though not red, were always something that had fascinated her. And she remembered his words from the previous day on the bank of the river. She'd asked him why his eyes went from gold to black and he told her it was because he was _hungry_ … for her. She took it to mean that his eyes betrayed his lust for her body, but was he trying to tell her more? Was Edward's 'but' that he was actually hungry for her _blood_ as well?

The natural reaction should have been to run – to put the books back neatly as if she had never been there and then to run for the nearest cab to take her to the airport. She could leave England and never think about Edward, his mystery, or _vampires_ again. And yet – here she sat – rigid over the books in front of her continuing to think. The more she thought, the more convinced she became that she knew Edward's secret.

"Vampire," she whispered quietly.

Bella took the cotton gloves off of her hands and hesitated over the document for several seconds before tracing one of the flourished Es with her fingertip. Could it be that _her_ Edward had written this nearly a hundred and fifty years ago? Her mind began to race with the possibilities, encountering mind-bending problems at every turn. She wondered idly whether he had placed the document in her path somehow, but couldn't determine how that would be possible.

She must have sat, unmoving, for nearly an hour before a pair hands on her shoulders made her jump and yelp. They were all wrong; they were warm.

"Sorry to startle you, Dr. Swan," Mike's voice squeaked above her. "You looked tense."

Bella glared at him until he removed his hands from her shoulders. He looked down sheepishly and mumbled another apology.

"What did you find?" Bella asked, surprised by how steady and normal her voice sounded.

Mike perked up when she asked for his findings and walked around the table to the other chair.

"There was lots of information about the relocation of families during the 15th and 16th centuries. Rather, there was lots of evidence that it _didn't_ happen very often, as you thought. I printed out several articles that talked about why families tended to stay rooted to their homelands for centuries, hoping that would be of use to you. Also, I did a search on what kind of money would be needed to facilitate that kind of move; it's pretty hefty if you ask me … not something a typical family in that time period would have access to."

Bella was impressed with the depth of his research. He really went the extra step to get her the information that she needed and she appreciated his attention to detail. Clearly, he was good at what he did even if it _wasn't_ handling documents. Perhaps she'd misjudged him.

"This is good, Mike. Thank you."

He beamed at her praise, and Bella felt even guiltier at her snap judgment of him. He flipped through some papers until he found what he was looking for.

"The term you sent me looking for was harder to nail down," he said with a frown, shaking his head. "I looked up _Stregoni Benefici _in three different dictionaries. The first two only had the words separate. Translated in that way, the term is "wizard's benefit." I could find no mention of Wizard's Benefit in any folklore reference at all. The third dictionary I looked at was one that dealt in the occult. I figured if you were going up here, maybe I'd find something there."

Bella felt her stomach tighten in fear. What if she had inadvertently sent him on a goose chase that led him directly where she was trying not to lead him? She bit her lip as she waited for him to tell her what he knew.

"That dictionary had a definition for the _Stregoni Benefici_ that was really … weird. It said the term was related to vampires who had forsaken human blood and sustained themselves solely on the blood of animals. It went on to state that these creatures were often protectors of mankind and their gentler nature made them less of a threat, though no less deadly should one take a notion to kill a human."

Bella swallowed the bile rising in her throat. The fact that the term had any relevance to vampire legend made her want to bang her head against the table. However, the information was fascinating in light of the pamphlet she had just read. She was contemplating how it might relate to Edward when Mike cleared his throat.

"Dr. Swan? Are you feeling well? You look rather pale."

"Yes!" Her voice was too bright and too loud. "I'm fine," she continued in a more normal tone of voice. It's been a long day researching. You've done well."

"You don't believe any of that stuff, do you?" Mike asked, furrowing his brow. "That … vampire hocus-pocus?"

Bella bristled at his tone of voice but took a deep breath before answering.

"It isn't about what you and I believe," she answered. "It's about what the people who wrote the letters believe."

"Right. Our sources."

He nodded and colored a bit at her lecturing tone. Bella felt her fingers shaking. She needed a moment alone to collate the information. She was on overload and felt that at any moment she might burst with the weight of her suppositions.

"I'm going to call it a night here, Mike," she said, stretching her arms above her head in an exaggerated motion and yawning loudly.

_You're a terrible fucking actress, Isabella_, she chided herself.

"I'm tired too," Mike said quickly. "And hungry again. Can I … take you to dinner?"

His too-young face was pink with hope and Bella smiled sadly at him. Her answer was in her averted eyes, but she felt she owed him a firm answer.

"Mike, you're a lovely young man. But … I'm with Edward."

Her heart raced at his name and she flushed like a schoolgirl saying her crush's name aloud. Mike was stuttering over his words, telling her it was "cool" and not to worry, but all Bella could hear was her own voice saying she was "with Edward." There was so much truth in those words that she was nearly choking on it.

Bella tidied up her workspace like a dutiful researcher and slipped the pamphlet she'd found into an acid-free envelope. Then, like a thief in the night, she tucked the envelope into her own bag and marched toward the doors with her palms sweaty and her heart racing. Technically, she should have handed the pamphlet over to the librarian so it could be catalogued and archived. But Bella couldn't take that risk, not guessing as she did that Edward himself might have written on it.

* * *

As she exited the library, the sun was low and turning the sky a deep red. _Red sky at night, sailor's delight_, she chanted to herself as she attempted to distract herself. If she chanted nonsense rhymes to herself, maybe she could forget about what else was red – _vampire eyes_. Bella shivered. Distraction wasn't working. And Bella wasn't entirely certain she _wanted_ to be distracted. She wanted to _know_; and then, she wanted to move on.

Edward had promised to meet her after dark inside the vestibule of the library, but she wanted to be outside in the night air to clear her head. As she looked at the setting sun, she couldn't help but notice that the day had been sunnier than any of her previous days in England. _You're being ridiculous, Isabella … he told you yesterday he had business._ She walked through the streets to the small shop where she had gotten the steak and ale pie the night before. She had a hankering for comfort food and that pie definitely fit the bill. She hoped that it would calm her nerves.

After finishing her dinner along with a pint of the pub's finest ale, Bella felt remarkably better. She walked out into the misty evening and wrapped herself in the red sweater she had tied around her waist, knowing the evening air would get chilly. When she reached the river, she began to amble and think. Think and amble. She realized that she was looking forward to seeing Edward again; she wasn't frightened of him, she was eager to see him and disprove her fantastical conclusions from this afternoon's research.

_After all, if vampires are real, what's next? Mermaids, werewolves, unicorns? Was nothing fantasy anymore?_

"You look beautiful in the moonlight," a familiar voice purred in her ear.

Bella's skin erupted in gooseflesh, and she immediately smiled, leaning into his embrace. _See? Even when he startles you, you aren't afraid._

"I missed you," she murmured as she leaned against him.

He was hard … his chest, his arms, well, _him_. Everything about him was sharp lines and angles, though she wouldn't have described him as made of stone. That implied that leaning against him was uncomfortable and for Bella, feeling his arms around her was the most natural feeling in the world.

"Why are you doing that?" he asked.

She realized that she had been squeezing and releasing his arm, testing to see if she could feel any give in his muscles.

"Oh, um, I – ah – like your muscles," she said stupidly.

_Great. Very smooth._

"Mmm," he murmured, turning her around and kissing her lightly. "Then squeeze away."

Bella smiled as his mouth covered hers again, and she tasted him. He was a delicious mix of mint and honey and Edward. Even though they were in the middle of the street, her hands traveled up his arms and to his neck and she began trying to pull him closer. She wanted his tongue, his lips, everything open to her. He easily pulled away from her and sighed, fanning her with his sweet breath. Bella felt that unusual high caress her as she drank in his scent.

"Shall we walk?" he asked.

He put his arm around her waist and began rubbing small circles on her back.

"How did research go? Did you find anything interesting?"

"Well," Bella said, squirming uncomfortably.

She was much more comfortable when they were kissing or just walking. She didn't want to discuss her findings and bring the issue to a head. She wanted to continue on as they were … her pretending not to know, and him thinking that she hadn't guessed.

"Bella," Edward said, concern in his voice. "Did you find something that upset you?"

Bella stopped and looked up at him, shocked again by the way his golden eyes burned in the moonlight. She felt her courage wavering but then closed her eyes and steeled her resolve.

"Can we go somewhere? Private. So we can talk? I think – I think I know your secret."

* * *

_**A/N**__: So, she knows. And she's about to tell him. Before you bring out the pitchforks on me for not having her just say it … out loud, let me explain. I wanted us to hear it through Edward's ears and since I hate switching POV mid chapter, we'll have to wait for next chapter. Please read the important note that follows. Much love to you for reading and I hope you all continue to enjoy!_

_*__**Important Note**__: I've signed up to contribute to two very important charities this Spring. I'm going to do an outtake from each of my current WIPs, one for each charity. I would like you, the readers, to choose what I do for this story. I have two polls on my profile right now, and I'd like you to weigh in. The charity that I will be donating the FP outtake to will be: __**Finding Your Voice: Fandom Fights Mental Illness**__. This is particularly close to my heart, having suffered from a long bout with Post-Partum Depression. Please take a moment to vote in the poll and consider donating to the cause? I will have links for both of the charities that I'm contributing to on my profile. Sorry for the extra long note. =)_


	13. The Secret Castle of Thetford

_I dream of fire_

_Those dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire_

_And in the flames_

_Her shadows play in the shape of man's desire_

_This desert rose_

_Each of her veils, a secret promise_

_This desert flower_

_No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this_

_And as she turns_

_This way she moves in the logic of all my dreams_

_This fire burns_

_I realize that nothing's as it seems_

…

_I dream of rain_

_I lift my gaze to empty skies above_

_I close my eyes_

_This rare perfume is the sweet intoxication of her love._

_**Desert Rose**__, Sting 1999_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own Edward. Or Bella. Or even freaking Mike Newton. That's SM. I just own a burning desire to write about them all. FML. Lol_

_Many thanks to my fuckawesome beta team: DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. I surround myself with people like them so that my stories look pretty for you. ;)_

* * *

Edward stared, dumbfounded, at Bella's worried face. _I think I know your secret_, she had said. But earlier, when he came up behind her, she'd leaned into his embrace as though it was welcome. That was impossible if she truly _knew_, wasn't it?

"Come," he said stiffly. "Do you mind a drive? I've brought my car."

She looked puzzled, but nodded her assent.

"That's fine," she replied, smiling and reaching out for his hand.

As he led her back to the car, Edward expected her to cringe away from him. He cursed vehemently the block between her mind and his, wanting to know everything immediately.

_Show some patience, brother_, Alice's voice whispered faintly in his mind. _For an immortal, you're having an awfully difficult time waiting five minutes to know the truth._

Edward knew that Alice had been watching the library all day, so he wasn't surprised to hear her voice. She must have still been in the vicinity. He was annoyed at her for intentionally blocking the future from him, but understood. Alice would tell him if anything truly dangerous were about to transpire, but she refused to get involved in the nuances of his and Bella's relationship. It had been his policy … before, when Alice had a mate and his gift could have helped her.

Bella looked up at him in confusion when they approached his car.

"Seriously?" she asked. "Where have you been hiding this thing?"

His sleek silver sports car looked fairly unobtrusive in the parking lot; he'd gone to a lot of trouble to make sure that the car blended in even though it was among the fastest street-legal cars on the market.

"I – haven't been hiding it. I just thought you'd prefer to travel by boat or train around the countryside."

"You have an E83 Viper in your possession, and you don't break it out at every chance you can? This thing is possibly the hottest car on the market right now."

Edward was, yet again, blown away by Bella's vast and varied knowledge base.

"So you're a rare documents expert _and_ a Car and Driver aficionado? The mystery around you grows."

"It's no mystery, really," she said softly. "Dad's a cop by day, a race-car nut by night. It's always funny when he envies the same drag racers he slaps with fines. I picked up his passion a little bit … gave us something to talk about over long, quiet dinners. I really need to call him," she added as an afterthought.

Edward opened the door for her, and she slid in, caressing the soft leather interior appreciatively. He closed the door after her and shook his head as he walked around to the driver's side.

"So … where to?" she asked lightly when he sat behind the wheel.

Edward's lips quirked into a lopsided smile despite the nervousness picking at his brain. She seemed too at ease to have really discovered the truth. Perhaps Alice had seen incorrectly.

"I told you there was someplace I wanted to take you," he said. "You talk; I'll drive."

He revved the engine and threw the car into gear. Driving had been one of the few modern inventions that he truly appreciated. Cars such as this one mimicked his immortal speed and it was exhilarating to maneuver a manmade device with vampiric ability. Of course, he never drove with a human in the car. He'd nearly forgotten that Bella would be uncomfortable with the speed on the tiny road.

"Jesus Christ on a Hotrod, Edward! Just because it _can_ go this fast, doesn't mean it _should_. You're going to get us killed!" She shut her eyes and gripped the handle of the door, muttering under her breath. "_Some_ of us aren't indestructible."

"What was that?" he asked, though he had heard her perfectly.

She opened her eyes wide and looked over at him. She gasped when her eyes locked with his.

"Watch the fucking road!" she cried, covering her eyes.

Edward chuckled and looked away from her.

"I have the road memorized, Bella. You're in no danger."

"Memorized or no, humor me and watch where you're going," she said through clenched lips. "And for the love of all that's holy, slow down a little?"

He sighed and eased off the gas, bringing the car under 150 kph. He hated going slowly, even though most would still consider his speed excessive for a dark night on a twisty road.

"Now … about your research."

Bella squirmed in her seat and turned to look out the window. As the scenery flew by in a blur, she turned away and looked back down at the floor of the car. Edward realized he had been staring at her again and reluctantly brought his eyes back to the road.

"You're avoiding my question," he murmured.

"I don't want to distract you," she answered immediately. "I want to make it to our destination in one piece."

Edward sighed and slowed down even further, turning the car into a flat clearing. There was nothing around for miles and he could leave the car in the clearing if need be. He killed the engine and turned toward her. She was sitting uncomfortably on her hands and biting her lip.

"There. No more distractions. Now, please. Tell me what you've found."

Bella closed her eyes and drew in a deep sigh before reaching into her satchel and pulling out an acid-free envelope. She unbuckled her seat belt and turned fully toward Edward, tucking her leg underneath of her. Her brown eyes swum with uncertainty as she looked up at him.

"I know – what you are. This," she said as she handed him the envelope, "told me everything I needed to know."

He took the envelope from her without opening it or even looking at it. His eyes never left hers.

"I want to hear it from you," he said quietly.

It seemed difficult for her to keep her eyes locked with his. Her eyelids fluttered but she clenched her jaw and nodded.

"Your skin … it's cold all the time," she barely whispered. As she spoke she reached out her hand and brushed a fingertip against his thumb. "You're hard; there's no give in your muscles as though you were carved from marble. You don't eat … food. And your eyes … Edward, it's all in those papers if you'll just open …"

"From you," he whispered, pulling his hand away from her burning touch. "I want to hear you say it."

"Vampire."

Her voice was so low that even with his immortal senses he barely heard more than a wisp of sound.

"Out loud," he commanded, his voice harsher than he intended for it to be.

Her eyes flashed up to his quickly. Was it fear he saw there? It was what he deserved to see.

"You're a vampire," she said more steadily. "Aren't you?"

He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, drinking in the smell of her that filled the car.

"I am."

He waited five torturous seconds, wondering when he would hear the rustle of fabric and the click of the door that would signal her departure. It never came. He felt her warmth approaching his face and opened his eyes just as her hand cupped his cheek.

"Why are you still here?" he asked, unable to mask the pain in his voice.

She frowned at him and shook her head.

"I thought I'd made that fairly clear last night," she murmured, stroking his cheek with her thumb and warming his cold skin with her touch. "I'm in love with you."

He leaned into her hand for an instant before reaching up and pulling her hand down to his lips.

"You can't be in love with me," he said, shaking his head.

"And who are you to decide that?" she asked indignantly.

He barked out a surprised laugh before shaking his head again.

"It just doesn't seem possible. Knowing what you now know … how?"

"Edward," she said, sighing. "I don't think I had much choice in this. I think my heart was lost the first time you kissed me."

"I should have told you then," he murmured.

"What would that have changed?" she asked, tilting her head to the side in curiosity.

"You would have run. I could have scared you away."

Bella giggled and rubbed his fingers between hers.

"You think, even then, I could have left you? Because I don't. There was a connection there immediately … You felt it too, I'm sure of it."

Edward leaned toward her, breathing in the thick scent so that his throat burned with thirst. He brought his nose within inches of her jugular and felt the hot blood pulsing just below the surface. Bella's breathing increased and her heart rate sped as he brought his lips to her pulse point. He ran his nose up to her ear, darting his tongue out to taste the soft flesh of the lobe.

"You think I couldn't scare you?" he whispered darkly. "Even if I had held you in my arms, kissing your neck and telling you how lovely your blood smelled to me."

She gasped and pulled back so that she could look at him. Her eyes were wide and the color was high on her cheeks.

"You would never hurt me," she said firmly.

"But I could," he replied.

"You wouldn't."

"But … I could."

His lips were inches from her face, the only barrier between his teeth and her soft flesh. Still, she didn't flinch away from him.

"Fine," she said, setting her jaw. "Try. If it's so easy, hurt me."

He blinked in surprise, and pulled back away from her.

"I don't believe you can," she whispered, "because you love me, too."

"Oh, Bella."

His voice was a pained groan, and he bowed his head in defeat. He heard her moving beside him and looked up to see her crawling over the center console and straddling his lap. He opened his arms to her, and she took his face firmly in her hands.

"You do, don't you?" she demanded.

He nodded in response, but she shook her head violently.

"I want to hear it," she said. "I _deserve_ to hear it. Out loud."

She smirked as she threw his words back at him.

"I love you beyond reason, Bella Swan, and I could never harm you."

He reached up and traced the delicate lines of her cheekbones and her eyes fluttered closed at his touch.

"It never feels cold to me," she murmured as his fingers traced her lips. "Your touch … it's like liquid fire on my skin."

Bella opened her eyes and looked at him. She loosened her grip on his face and ran both hands over his face, barely touching him.

"What does it feel like to you?" she asked.

"You can't …" he groaned, swallowing thickly. "It's indescribable. Your skin is so hot it burns; but it warms me gently, lighting a fire wherever you touch."

She drew her fingers overtop of his closed eyelids, down to his cheekbones and around to his jaw. As her fingers traveled up into his hair, Edward moaned softly and leaned into her caress.

"Is it … difficult for you to be near me? Like this?"

Her breath fanned over him as she brought her lips close to his. She brushed the satin of her mouth against his once, and then again, before darting her tongue out to tease his lips. He gave up fighting his desire and wrapped his hand around the back of her neck as he kissed her, pushing his tongue into her mouth and tasting her. Bella's hands fisted in his hair, and she moaned into his mouth.

He slowed down their kiss reluctantly and leaned his forehead against hers for a moment as her heartbeat slowed.

"Do you mean … does kissing you tempt my control?"

She nodded without lifting her eyes to his.

"I've never felt in danger of biting you," he murmured, bringing his lips up to her forehead and murmuring against her overheated skin. "If I had, I would have never come up to your room last night."

Bella flushed at the memory of their time in the hotel room. Edward smiled at her reaction and kissed her gently.

"Does … my blood … not appeal to you?" she asked hesitantly.

He chuckled and shook his head.

"Quite the opposite." He paused, gauging her reaction. She stiffened slightly, but didn't pull away from him. "Your blood smells to me like the rarest, most perfectly aged wine might smell to a well-trained sommelier. It is the sweetest temptation."

"So … why aren't you tempted to bite me?"

She sounded confused, unsure of how to ask what she wanted to know. He could hear the incredulity in her voice, the small spark of disbelief that still resided in her practical mind. He understood, of course, her dilemma. She knew, academically, what her research had told her. But she hadn't seen him act abnormal in front of her. He had kept the façade of humanity tightly in place. He could tell her that he didn't feel tempted because to bite her might kill her, but it would still be little more than academic knowledge. It was time to let his mask fall to the side, to let her see him for what he was and make her own choice.

"I can explain everything you want to know when we arrive at our destination."

She nodded and began to move her body carefully back into her seat, but he stopped her.

"Instead of driving … would you care to … run?"

Bella sat back down heavily into his lap and began to smile strangely.

"You must be joking," she said, shaking her head. "It's pitch black, and we seem to be in the middle of nowhere."

"We're only about fifteen kilometers from the house," he replied quickly. "Besides, I thought perhaps you'd like to see how _I_ run."

Bella's eyes widened as she looked over his body. She seemed to be measuring his words against what she knew from her research. He knew the document she had found talked about vampire speed, but he doubted even the writer knew the full extent of his capabilities. She cocked her head to the side as though pondering the possibilities.

"Will I have to keep up with you?" she asked.

Edward threw he head back and laughed, the sound filling the car.

"As though you could catch me," he whispered, running his finger under her chin. "I plan to carry you on my back, love."

"I'm not exactly a lightweight," she commented, "and fifteen kilometers isn't a walk in the park, you know."

"Bella, I don't mean to frighten you, but I could pick up this car if I needed to. It would be slightly stretching my range, but it is well within my ability. I assure you carrying you would be like slinging a small pack over my shoulder."

Her mouth hung open slightly as she took in his words.

"The car?"

"Mm-hmm," he murmured. "_Incredible strength, incredible speed_ … isn't that what it said?"

Bella gasped and looked down at the envelope still in his hand.

"Did you – but you couldn't – I don't understand."

"I know," he said, running his hand down her back to calm her. "And I promise to explain it to you. Just … trust me."

Her eyes darkened as his voice softened considerably.

"Always."

* * *

After walking into the wooded area, Edward motioned for Bella to climb onto his back. She was tentative, as though she was afraid she'd hurt him in some way. Finally, after several awkward moments of dancing around each other, Edward simply lifted her up and hoisted her easily onto his back. She clung to his neck tightly, and he sighed at the feeling of her arms and legs wrapped around him. He ran his hand lightly over the curve of her thigh before tucking his arm under her knee for safety.

"Hold on," he whispered before taking off.

Bella clung to him as he darted through the trees, far slower than he would have normally. He felt her tuck her head tightly against his neck and whimper in fear as they blurred past the trees. After several minutes of cowering, he felt her tentatively lift her head and begin to look around. She was breathing rapidly, and he heard her gasp a few times, but she didn't hide her face again. As they passed within inches of a large sycamore tree, Bella let out a scream that trickled off into tiny peals of laughter. It made Edward feel almost giddy to hear her laughing and enjoying the run.

"Can you go faster?" she whispered, her lips brushing against his ear.

He reached up and pulled her arm more firmly around his neck and then took off through the forest at near-full speed. Bella's laugh rang through the dark forest, bouncing off the trees as they flew past them.

"This is amazing!" she cried.

Edward remained silent, but he smiled happily at her exuberant exclamation. Though she had been frightened at first, she accepted him and even embraced him for what he was.

"We're close," he called over his shoulder, his voice whipping away in the wind almost as soon as the words were out of his mouth.

"Where are we going?"

"Home," he said softly.

He didn't know if Bella heard or not, but she would soon see. He could already make out the high turrets of the house though they were nearly two kilometers away. It would be another moment or two before Bella saw the house rising out of the darkness. Edward could hear Alice's anxious thoughts in his mind, worrying over him as she was wont to do. She saw the immediate future clearly enough to know that Bella was with him and that she knew the truth. But Bella was about to get another shock when she saw Alice. He wondered how she would handle knowing that _two_ vampires had been in her room while she slept.

Edward slowed as they reached the long drive up to the house. He helped Bella to the ground and steadied her as she found her bearings again.

"Exhilarating," she said, wiping her damp palms on the front of her jeans, "but disorienting. How do you keep track of all of the trees?"

"My eyesight is much better than a – than yours."

"What were you going to say?" she asked softly.

"Than a human's."

"Ah," she replied quietly and looked around uncomfortably. "For … hunting?"

She laughed nervously.

"Yes, it definitely helps me pick out the deer and foxes," Edward quipped, reaching out to stroke her arm.

She looked up at him, shocked.

"Deer? But …"

"I said I'd explain everything. I'm not totally the monster that you feared."

"Edward, I never thought you were a monster," she whispered seriously, walking closer to him.

"Come," he said, taking her hand in his. "I want to show you my home. Alice is waiting for us."

He pulled gently on her hand, but she remained rooted where she stood.

"Alice," she said in monotone. "Alice Brandon. Your … assistant?"

"My sister," he replied.

He tugged again and this time she followed him slowly. She was looking from side to side, taking in everything around her.

"Where are we, anyway?" she asked.

"We just ran through the Thetford Forest. Our home is just on the outskirts of Thetford proper. This … is the 'secret castle of Thetford'," he said with a chuckle. "The Cullen estate. _My_ family's estate."

Bella was silent, as though she had already known that Edward was more connected to the Cullens than he pretended to be. As they stepped out of the cover of trees onto the path, she stopped and looked up at him warily.

"Just … tell me something," she said.

"Anything."

"Is there anyone I've interacted with on my stay here that _is_ human? Or did I step off the plane and into another dimension?"

Edward chuckled, but then realized that she was quite serious. He guessed at how she must feel, finding out that her vision of reality needed to include beings such as vampires.

"Yes. Everyone at the Bode was human. As were all of the staff at both hotels … Mike Newton."

Bella's eyes narrowed at the mention of the young researcher, but she didn't comment. She nodded and then began walking again.

"So Alice is …"

"A vampire as well, yes."

"And she knows … about us?"

Edward felt his chest tighten at her mention of them as a unit but nodded his assent.

"Alice knows a great deal about a lot of things," he said wryly. "I'll let her explain herself. She's simply dying to talk to you."

_So stop making me wait_, Alice's sing-song voice echoed in his head. He smirked at the thought of her dancing on the balls of her feet in anticipation.

The walk up to the house was torturous, hearing Alice's frenzied thoughts and worrying what Bella would think when accosted by the whirlwind of his sister. But they arrived at the large wooden doors, and Edward was filled momentarily with a sense of peace. He was bringing Bella home, in the truest sense of the word. There was no better place to reveal everything about himself than the house in which he'd spent the better part of three centuries. It felt right to bring her to his home, and he hoped that she would stay.

"Welcoming," Bella said sourly as she fingered the foreboding Medusa door knocker.

"It's not meant to be," Edward explained. "We don't have many guests, and we like it that way."

Alice was waiting for them in the balcony overlooking the foyer, looking down with rapt attention as Bella entered the house. Bella's mouth hung open in surprise at all of the clean lines and modern architecture that made up their home.

"Wow," she said. "Just, wow. This is incredible. How did you do this?"

"The speed is really helpful," Alice called from above, drawing Bella's attention. "So is the strength."

She vaulted gracefully over the ledge and landed noiselessly in front of Bella while Edward rolled his eyes. Bella jumped backwards and cringed against Edward's chest. He wrapped his arm around her, and Alice smirked.

_You're welcome_, she thought defiantly.

"Forgive my sister." Edward's voice was laced with annoyance and warning. "She's not used to company."

"Lighten up, Edward," Alice said. "She's fine. She already accepts us and wants to know more."

Alice showed him a vision of the two of them talking quietly on the couch, heads close together in deep conversation. The picture shifted, and he saw Bella's face lit in the firelight, and expression of passion on her face as Edward hovered over her. His groin tightened immeasurably at the implications, and Alice only giggled wickedly in response. Bella looked at the two of them in confusion, their private conversation lost on her.

"She's right, you know," she insisted. "I am fine … and I do want to know more. _Lots_ more."

"She usually is," Edward said, kissing her temple as Alice reached out for her hand. "She's a psychic, after all."

"So … when you were looking at each other?"

"It's rather convenient," Alice explained. "He can hear everything I think anyway, so if I have a vision, it's as though he's having it as well."

"Yeah … convenient." Bella's voice was both awed and confused as she continued to look wide-eyed between Alice and Edward.

Bella allowed Alice to pull her out of Edward's embrace and followed her further into the foyer.

_She's mine for a few moments,_ she teased him. _I'll leave soon enough._

Edward walked into the den and began making a fire. He listened as the two of them spoke, and Alice explained why she suddenly had different color eyes than she had when Bella first met her. Edward hadn't even known about the blue contacts which had turned her eyes green. He was away in the days before Bella arrived. Alice must have seen that Bella would be too observant of their similar eye color.

"Why don't you go into the den?" Alice asked her after Bella seemed more at ease. "I know you have questions, and Edward should be the one to answer them, not me."

Edward was at her side in an instant, already missing the closeness of her body in the few moments she'd been away from him.

"It would take all night, possibly several nights, to get through all of my questions," Bella said with a sigh.

Edward brought his lips close to her ear and whispered huskily, "Vampires don't sleep, love. Leaves loads of times for … questions."

He felt her shiver and lean into him, smelled the bloom of desire in the air as she heard the innuendo in his tone.

_Alright, and that's my cue to leave_, Alice thought, shaking her head.

He tugged on her hand, but then let go, walking quickly into the den to give Alice a moment to excuse herself. She'd be gone for the remainder of the night which would give him plenty of time alone with Bella, to answer her questions if that is what she wished. He swallowed the pool of venom that seemed to flow with his desire. The vivid image of Bella by the fire seemed to play in a loop through his mind.

"You've made my brother very happy, Bella," Alice said softly. "We're going to be good friends I think."

"And you're usually right," Bella said with a smile.

Edward lay back on one of the black leather couches in the room to wait for Bella. Alice explained to her that she needed to hunt and said goodbye. When he heard the door close, he looked up. Bella was standing in the entryway to the den, her eyes raking over him. Again, he thought of Alice's vision and the spark of desire grew within him. He beat it down and beckoned Bella over to him. She had looked confused for a moment, likely because of Alice's sudden departure, but her confusion melted away when she took in Edward's heavy stare.

"Alice saw we would need some time," he said huskily. "Sit with me. We have … all night."

* * *

_**A/N:**__ *giggles* I figured y'all would be totally cool with a fade to black, right? Joking, joking. Put yer pitchforks away. I like to take my time with conversations and lemons. You'll get more of this conversation and possibly a little lemony goodness as well next chapter. ;) Scouts honor. I need to publically say that I have the best betas in the fandom. I got this chapter to them, no lie, at midnight last night. And it's posting before 10:30 AM. It just doesn't get better or faster than that, my friends. Also, the poll on my profile will stay up until Sunday evening. If you haven't voted yet, please do so! I'll be taking it down Sunday night to put up the poll for the ATJ outtake. ;) Thanks so much for your votes so far! ~Jen _


	14. By The Fire

_Pride can stand a thousand trials_

_The strong will never fall_

_But watching stars without you_

_My soul cries_

_Heaving heart is full of pain_

_Oh, oh, the aching_

_Cause I'm kissing you, oh_

_I am kissing you, oh_

_Touch me deep, pure and true_

_Gift to me forever._

_**Kissing You,**__ Des'ree 1996_

_**Disclaimer:**__ You know this. I don't own the characters. But this story line is kinda, sorta original, so no copying please. =)_

_My beta team, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs … seriously, they are the best team, and friends, a girl could ask for. I am lucky to have them._

* * *

Bella looked at him steadily as she approached the couch where he lay. Edward had left enough room for her to lie beside him, but she did not. Instead, she moved over him, placing her hands over his silent chest and pushing him back gently. He allowed her to press against him and when he was on his back, she straddled him, lowering herself on top of him.

Edward shook his head in amazement as she stretched her body out on top of him, resting her chin on her hands and looking into his eyes.

"What are you shaking your head at?" she asked quietly, her breath warm against his face.

"Your reactions _are_ a little off, you know," he teased. "Most people would hear the word vampire and bolt."

"You're not that scary, Mr. Masen," she said haughtily. "You don't even have fangs. What kind of vampire _are_ you anyway?"

"Not that scary?" he murmured, a growl building in his chest.

Edward knew that she could feel it beneath her fingers, and her eyes reacted to the sound immediately, dilating to tiny pinpricks of desire as her breathing sped. He moved quickly, lifting Bella and then placing her gently on the couch beneath him. He must have looked like a blur of motion to her as he repositioned himself over top of her. She gasped as he brought his lips to her neck, stopping just before touching her.

"You know, it isn't very smart to tease the vampire, love," he purred. "I may feel the need to prove how scary I can be."

"Perhaps this is further evidence of my insanity," Bella panted, "but that really turned me on."

Bella giggled as he ran his nose up her neck and darted his tongue out to taste behind her ear. She sighed as he covered his teeth and sucked the lobe of her ear into his mouth, flicking the skin with his tongue.

"Yes, clinically insane," Edward proclaimed, settling himself more comfortably at her side. "I shall have to keep you here for your own safety."

"And how will you treat me?" she asked impishly, smirking at him.

He purred again, and she leaned in to kiss him but he pulled away, holding his finger up to her lips.

"Questions first; treatment later."

He kissed her gently, and she groaned but nodded.

"I do have questions," she admitted. "Scads of them."

Edward smiled and then held up his finger again, asking her to wait.

"Before you commence questioning, may I say something?"

She nodded, a confused look on her face.

"Thank you. For uncovering my secret and for loving me in spite of it. I never thought . . . couldn't imagine . . . ever finding anyone who would understand or _want_ me. But you do and it has made all the difference in the world."

He didn't allow her to answer him. He captured her lips and kissed her, gently at first and then harder until they were both panting, and her hands were buried in his hair trying to pull him closer to her. He pulled away just enough so that he could speak again.

"Knowing that I can do that to you, even now that you know what I am, is more of a gift than you can possibly imagine."

Bella's fingers ran through his hair softly, tracing down until they swirled at the back of his neck making him shiver with her burning touch. She smiled warmly in response to his open look of desire. Edward finally felt free to let all of his emotion show when he looked at her. He didn't know if it would be overwhelming to her, but he chose not to hide the depth of his love any longer. As she stared at him, her eyes crinkled at the corners with her wide smile. She ran her thumb against his cheek and gently chuckled.

"So, what erroneous vampire legend shall I debunk first? Garlic, holy water, crosses, hmm? What would you like to know first?"

He kept his voice light, but he felt the slightest bit of fear touch his dead heart as he wondered what she would ask about. Running with a vampire and academically dissecting the evidence was one thing. Lying next to a real vampire and asking him about his diet was quite another. Unsurprisingly, that was the first question she went for.

"What do you eat?" she asked quickly.

"I'm a vampire," he said softly. "I drink blood."

"Yeah, but what kind? You said something outside that confused me. You said your eyesight helped you locate deer and foxes. The papers that I read only talked about vampires hunting . . . well, humans."

He chuckled and ran a finger through her hair.

"I told you I was on a special diet, even for my kind. My fam – Alice and I, consider ourselves vegetarians. We only feed from the blood of animals and abstain from human blood."

Bella nodded and was silent for several moments, seeming to consider everything he said. Edward decided to ask her the question he'd been wondering about.

"You told me you never considered me a monster," he said. "What did you think I ate if not animal blood?"

Bella considered her answer for several minutes before answering.

"Remember, I haven't had long to digest this, but I just assumed that you drank from humans. But it never occurred to me think of you as a killer. I just thought . . . well, I thought you got around it somehow."

"Got around it? Did you think I was a regular visitor to the blood bank?"

She frowned at him and smacked his shoulder.

"I said I haven't had long to think about it, and I'm not trying to insinuate that I'm not _thrilled_ you don't dine on humans." She shuddered, and he tried to look past her natural reaction. "I guess . . . well, I guessed that your ability to read minds played into it. I thought, perhaps, that you culled your – victims – from the baser section of society."

He stared at her in amazement long enough for her to squirm in discomfort.

"What? What are you thinking?"

"It's just . . . sometimes you say things, and I wonder if you can't see into _my_ mind. When I was younger, well, a younger vampire, I tried that from time to time. If I read base thoughts in someone's mind, I would take it upon myself to rid society of the criminal. It was my excuse for giving into my desire for human blood, but I haven't done that in cen – many years."

Bella blinked in response to his slip of the tongue.

"How old are you?" she whispered and then blushed.

He ran his fingers over the hot bloom of blood under her skin as he watched her eyes search his for signs of displeasure.

"Twenty-nine," he said firmly.

"Wait—you're the same age as me?" Bella asked.

Edward could almost see the numbers crunching in her brain.

"Physically, yes," he murmured.

Bella's eyes widened and then her brows knitted again.

"How long have you _been_ twenty-nine?"

"Four hundred and seventy-five years," he replied without an instant of hesitation.

Bella's mouth hung open for just a second before her hands found his face again. She traced the lines and planes with an awed wonder, and Edward was left to ponder what she was thinking. Her eyes seemed focused on the path of her fingers, studying every motion.

"Are you looking for signs of aging?" he asked with a nervous laugh. "You won't find any. I don't – can't age."

"Shh," she murmured. "I can't even fathom how long you've walked this earth."

"Oh, come now. Surely you've dated documents older than me," he whispered, trying to lighten her mood. "I can't be _that_ decrepit."

"Hush," she scolded. "You're perfect, and you know that. That's not what I mean. The things you've seen, the _history_ you've lived through . . . I must seem so provincial in light of all of that."

He sighed as her fingers skimmed under his eyes and brushed against his lashes. As her fingers found his lips, he kissed each of her fingertips faster than she could process, and she blinked in surprise.

"I've seen kings and princes fall, countries absorbed, and wars end, but you are the most amazing thing I have ever laid eyes on."

She looked down suddenly, embarrassed as some thought crossed her mind. Again, Edward wished that he could pick it from her brain and answer it.

"I hate not knowing what you're thinking," he said, reaching up and brushing her forehead with his fingertips as though he could push whatever wall was between them away.

"It's silly," Bella said quickly. "Unimportant, really."

"Nothing you want to know is unimportant," he said sincerely. "You can ask me anything without fear of judgment, and I'll answer you honestly. I have no secrets left to hide from you."

She smiled sadly and looked up at him. What he saw in her eyes was doubt, concern.

"Were you always – alone? I mean . . . am I . . ."

"Shh," he hushed her, drawing her close to his chest as she stumbled over her question. Her face was hot, and he sensed that she was close to tears. Of all the questions she could ask, the thing she feared the most was that she wasn't his first?

"I'm sorry," she murmured against his chest. "I told you it was silly. You're with me now, and that's all that matters."

"It's not silly for you to wonder," he replied. "I wonder about your past, and God knows mine is longer than yours. I had a wife when I was human. Her name was Victoria, and she died in childbirth two years after we were married."

Bella's body stiffened in his arms as though she had been struck hard. He held her as she processed the information, knowing that it would be a shock and would lead to more questions. He waited, finding some store of patience that he didn't realize he had.

"You had a family."

"No, I had a wife. My child died along with its mother; I didn't even know its gender. Times were very different then. We didn't marry because we loved each other. I mourned her, and the child, but it was a duty. It wasn't love. In over 500 years, you are the first woman I have loved."

She let out a long shuddering sigh and looked up at him with tears in her eyes. He brushed them aside, his dead heart crumbling at the thought that she was in pain.

"Tell me about her?" she asked thickly.

"I don't remember her," he whispered, shaking his head. "I remember that her hair was fiery red and that she had a sweet smile, but I can't remember her voice or whether we were happy."

"Well 475 years is a long time . . . that's a lot of memories."

"I remember every one of my immortal years with perfect clarity. Human memories are different. We can save some of them, if we hold onto them in our first years. I didn't hold onto Victoria. I know that must sound heartless, but it is what it is."

"I want to know everything," she murmured, "even the things you think are mundane or you think I won't understand. Tell me about how you knew the Cullens. Has it always been just you and Alice, or were there others? Who wrote the letters? Edward, I want to know it all."

He chuckled and shook his head.

"My past is a tangled web of stories, but it is all linked to the Cullens. Carlisle Cullen, the patriarch of that family, was my creator. My father, if you will."

"If you knew them, why have me examine the documents?"

"They're gone, Bella."

His voice broke though he wasn't able to cry.

"Gone? Your kind can die?"

"We can be destroyed, but that isn't what happened to them. They're still alive, but they've been taken by another set of vampires. Their memories of us have been erased. For them, it is as though we never existed. They took our foster parents, our siblings and . . . Alice's mate."

"Alice's—oh! Is that like her husband?"

Edward could see the way her mind was working to try and wrap itself around the reality of his world. He shrugged his shoulders and nodded.

"You could say that, though marriage is a human construct with human limitations. When a vampire mates, it is for life, which for us is eternity."

Bella's body temperature rose considerably at his words, and he saw the blush spread from her cheeks down her neck. He wondered what he'd said that had sparked her arousal, but he could most certainly smell it in the air.

"That is awful for Alice," Bella whispered, averting her eyes from his. "I can't imagine the pain she must be in. How long?"

"They were taken twenty years ago. We haven't seen them since."

"And . . . you didn't have a . . . mate?"

She pulled her lip between her teeth as she asked the question softly. Her eyes remained on her hands which played with Edward's shirt. He reached out and tipped her chin upwards so that she would look at him.

"No, you are the only woman who has ever held my heart, dead though it may be."

She rested her palm over his chest for the first time and waited, cocking her head to the side in confusion when she didn't hear or feel anything. He picked her hand up gently and placed it over her own breast.

"It beats here now."

Her eyes became lidded as she looked at him.

"Am I your mate, Edward?" she whispered.

"I can't . . . . It is not up to me. For me, there is no other; there never will be. You are my heart and my life now."

"How can you even doubt that I feel the same?" she asked, shaking her head as her voice rose. "I'm lying here next to a vampire, talking about your vampire family that has been stolen from you by – wait for it – other vampires. Jesus, Edward, I'm not running away from you. That should stand for something!"

"Please don't be angry. I don't doubt your feelings," he insisted. "But I won't make decisions for you or place terms on your feelings that you don't fully understand. Yes, I consider you my mate; but I would never presume to say that you feel the same."

She brought her face within inches of his, her nose brushing against his. His eyes closed momentarily at the nearness of her, the gentle caress of her heat against his skin.

"I do," she murmured. "I might be unable to fathom an eternity the way that you can, but I can't imagine one second of my life without you in it."

The breath Edward had been holding as she spoke came out in a sob as he brought his lips reverently to hers. He deepened their kiss immediately, moving over top of her and pressing his body against hers. She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him down to her, kissing him as passionately as he kissed her. When he slowed their kiss, she growled and grabbed at his hair.

"No!" she cried. "Don't pull away from me. Not now; not tonight."

With a moan, he slid his hands under her shirt to feel her ribs and skin against his, sliding his tongue into her mouth and giving in just slightly. He moved down to her neck, over her collar bone and up to her ear. He knew she could feel him pressing against her leg, and he could certainly sense her readiness, yet he held back. Waiting for her.

"Tell me what you want," he growled in her ear.

"Make love to me," she panted, arching her body up to meet his. "We've both wanted this from the moment we met. And now, there's nothing stopping us. I know . . . and I still want you. I _need_ you. And I love you."

He pressed against her, feeling the warmth of her body seep through his as she wrapped one leg around his waist.

"I'm afraid," he whispered softly.

She chuckled, and he looked down at her.

"What could a vampire be afraid of?" she asked, still laughing.

"Breaking you," he replied seriously. "I can't just turn the strength off, and it's remarkably difficult to remember you aren't indestructible when you're writhing beneath me like that."

His voice became gravelly at the end, and he brought his lips down to hers, rocking against her again. He wanted her desperately, but he was worried about testing his control. Bella pulled away from him this time and brushed his face with her hands.

"You told me yourself," she whispered, "you could never harm me. Love me, Edward. It's the right time."

He closed his eyes and let himself give into kissing her, simply getting lost in the feeling of her mouth moving with his. The night before when he'd been with her, he'd felt the urge to bite _something_ as he came, but he hadn't felt in danger of biting _her_. He desperately wanted to try.

Bella cried out as he picked her up off the couch and moved rapidly across the room to lay her down on a rug in front of the fire.

"What . . ."

"I told you before: when I had you, it would be perfect. I want you in front of the fire."

He stood and ran over to the couch, grabbing some pillows and returning to her side in an instant.

"It's really more freeing than I could have imagined being able to be myself in front of you."

She smiled and reached out to him, her hands shaking slightly as she did.

"I don't want you to have to hide from me anymore," she said huskily. "We're together. nothing is going to change that."

Edward scattered the pillows around them on the floor and brought his lips to hers again. He found the hem of her shirt and pulled hard enough to rip it up the middle. Bella gasped and looked down at herself.

"So – that was hot – but I don't have a change of clothes," she said with a shaky laugh.

He ran his fingers up her stomach, ripping her bra in the process, and laughed wickedly at her.

"Maybe I don't like you wearing clothes," he murmured, bowing his head to her chest and capturing her nipple between his lips.

Bella cried out and arched her body upward as he swirled his tongue around the taut peak.

"Maybe not," she gasped. "But Alice might. Like me wearing clothes, that is."

He growled and released her breast.

"Alice brought all of your clothes from the hotel to our home earlier this evening."

Bella held her hand out and stopped him from returning to her chest, a question in her eyes.

"Psychic, remember? She saw you needing them. Now can we please stop talking about my sister while I'm trying to fuck you?"

Bella groaned and fisted his shirt in her fingers. She pressed her body against his as she kissed him – hard.

He chuckled and pulled away from her, to see her panting beneath him.

"You liked that? I thought it was rather crass, but . . ."

"Crass, maybe," she harshly, "but a definite turn on. Now, follow through."

She grunted in frustration as she pulled at his shirt, trying to rip the fabric away from his body. Edward smiled and pulled the sweater carefully over his head, tossing it onto the couch.

"I'm glad you didn't rip that one," Bella murmured, dancing her fingers up his body. "I rather like that color green next to your hair."

Edward laughed, stunned, at what she had said.

"What? What's funny?"

"Nothing," he said distractedly, running his hands over her shoulders to help her remove the tattered shreds of her shirt. "It's just – well, when I was human, my eyes were that color."

She smiled warmly and nodded.

"I can see that," she whispered, "but I love your eyes now. They speak _volumes_ to me."

She knelt up and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her breasts against his chest. He ran his fingers down her bare back and delighting in the way her skin responded to his touch. She arched and cried out as his fingers swirled at the base of her spine.

"I need to ask you something," he whispered, pulling away from her gently.

"Anything."

He smiled and laid his hand over her heart.

"I need to know if you've been intimate with anyone else before," he said softly. "I'm not asking because of . . . jealousy. I need to know if there is a chance you'll bleed."

If his face could have burned with embarrassment, it would have. He hated that his nature made him ask for such an explanation from her, though he would be lying if he didn't admit that he was curious.

"Shh," she whispered. "I'm not a virgin. And you're allowed to be jealous. I mean, I kind of want you to be. I want all of you, and I'm not embarrassed about being jealous of a woman who died almost five hundred years ago. My history is much more recent. And I wish I didn't have those memories."

_Human memories fade_, he thought instantly and quashed it almost as soon as he thought it. She hadn't even asked about what it took to become like him. He had no right to think about that; and yet, he couldn't help himself. He sighed and held her to him.

"I haven't been alone for five hundred years," he murmured against her forehead. "You were honest with me. I owe you the same. There have been other women. Not humans, but . . . well . . ."

She breathed in deeply.

"Can we agree that whatever happened before we met is past and doesn't matter?" she asked, looking up at him. "I appreciate your honestly. It means so much to me, but I don't want to know about anyone else. I'm glad to know you weren't completely alone, but I don't want to picture you with anyone else. I just want you all to myself."

Edward bent down and kissed her gently, offering himself to her in his kiss. She opened her lips to him and took his tongue into her mouth with a soft moan, running her fingers lightly over his chest. Bella pressed her body to his so that he could feel her heartbeat against his silent chest. It reverberated through him and set his senses reeling.

"God, Bella," he murmured, as her fingers found their way into his hair again. "I love it when you do that."

She tugged roughly on his hair, and he cried out, gripping her hips as roughly as he dared, and moving against her. Her hands were all over his scalp, trailing fire along his skin as she moved beneath the strands.

"That?" she asked. "You like when I pull your hair?"

She tugged again, harder, and he kissed her again.

"Yes," he growled. "Harder."

Bella pulled with what Edward assumed was all her might and the desire exploded within him. Her face was possessive, in control. She wanted his head tilted back, and when he complied, she nipped at his neck with her teeth. She couldn't bite him, but her assertiveness thrilled him. Her hands roamed lower, and she clawed her fingers across his shoulders, making him shiver.

"What do you want, Edward?" she purred in his ear, licking along the lobe. "Hmm? Tell me how you want me."

With a lightning fast movement, he laid her on her back and pulled her jeans off of her in tatters. Going for consistency, he ripped her panties from her body. She looked up at him through lowered lashes and smiled.

"We're going to go through a lot of clothes if you can't stop yourself from ripping all of mine."

She leaned back on her elbows, and then reached out for his pants.

"Off," she commanded, tugging at the waistband.

He moved quickly to comply, and knelt between her legs, naked in an instant.

"You never answered me," she whispered. "What do you want?"

He bent down over her, fanning his breath over her skin and making her moan. He darted his tongue over her collar bone, and she writhed beneath him.

"I want . . . to _fuck_ you," he whispered hoarsely.

The word had the desired effect, making Bella moan and reach up for him, trying to pull him down to her. He clucked his tongue at her and remained hovering above her.

"I want to make love to you. I want everything. Now that you know how long I've been waiting for you, perhaps you can understand that I may never be sated."

"Now," she groaned. "I need you inside me."

As he slid inside her warmth, feeling her walls surround him, he moaned her name reverently. He held himself back, moving so slowly that he could feel every inch of her body as he moved inside of her. When he was buried within her, he stilled and let her warmth seep through him. Bella lifted her legs and wrapped them tightly around his waist, looking up at him with pure love.

"We were meant to be together," she whispered. "Make love to me, Edward."

He moved slowly at first, savoring the slippery friction that their bodies created. Her heat and his cold blended together, so that after a moment of being within her, their connection felt natural. Her hips lifted as his descended, and they matched each other's movements perfectly. Every minute shudder that went through her body rocked his like an earthquake. He soon found himself at the edge of his control, wanting to pound into her and find his release.

Bella's motions were becoming more erratic, and he knew her orgasm was close. He wanted to feel her come undone beneath him, rocking and crying out his name. Edward shifted, moving deeper within her as he transferred his weight and moved his hands down her body. He supported her back with one hand and knelt upright, keeping their bodies connected.

"God, you're beautiful," he murmured, looking down at her body stretched out in front of him.

She bucked against him, and he watched in fascination at the way their bodies looked joined, the bright pink flush of her skin moving next to his pale flesh. Edward ran his free hand over her body, brushing against lightly over the peak of her nipple. She groaned and pulled her lip between her teeth, moving her hips faster against him.

"More," she cried. "God, I'm so close, Edward."

He licked his lips as he trailed his fingertips over her flushed skin until he found the edge of her folds. Her hips bucked wildly as he parted her lips, but he closed his eyes in concentration, not wanting to let himself go until she had reached her climax. As he found the small nub of nerves and circled it, thrusting with her, she stiffened and then screamed. He stilled, his eyes wide in fear that he had hurt her, but her face was not pained. Her eyes were closed, and her mouth was drawn up in a partial smile as she came. One of her hands was fisted in her hair, the other palmed her breast. He moved his fingers again, and she groaned seductively.

"Harder," she whispered. "You can go harder."

Edward's nostrils flared as he looked at her, her eyes now open and watching him, waiting. She wanted to see him come. He moved his fingers away from her center and gripped her hips in both of his hands. He thrust harder, grunting with the effort to rein in the desire to plunge himself with all of his formidable strength into her core. She moved with him, encouraging him to go harder and finally telling him when he'd reached the edge of her comfort.

Her constant direction helped him let go a little. She wouldn't let him lose control; they were in it _together_, as she had said. He thrust again, and her eyes rolled back as another orgasm shook through her. The tight constriction of her walls around him combined with his rhythmic thrusts put him over the edge. As she cried out his name, begging him to come with her, he fell, roaring her name as he came.

* * *

They lay in front of the fire, Bella's body flush with desire. Edward let his fingers trail over her soft curves, memorizing again every line and curve. As he reached her hips, he saw the ten red circles that marked where he'd held her. He sighed.

"What?" she asked.

"I – bruised you. It will leave marks."

Bella shrugged and ran her fingers over the marks with a smile.

"I've gotten worse banging my shin on the foot of the bed," she said. "Besides . . . I kind of like it."

"Mmm," he murmured, brushing his lips against her forehead. "Is this more evidence of your insanity?"

She chuckled and rolled over to face him.

"No, I'm serious. I like that there's a mark of yours on me. It's like you claiming me."

"I don't like hurting you," he insisted.

"It didn't hurt," she replied. "Or, if it did, it was so lost in the good feelings that I never even noticed. Edward, they're ten tiny bruises. Can't you just enjoy the fact that we just made love . . . you know, without you killing me?"

She snorted and Edward had to smile with her.

"How can you be so cavalier about that?" he asked, astonished.

"Oh, be serious, Edward. There was never any danger, was there? I just wanted to point out how ridiculous you were being over a few bruises."

He breathed in deeply and shook his head.

"You've known my secret for less than a day, and already you are talking me down from ledges. Your mind is fascinating," he whispered. "It makes me wonder . . ."

He shook his head, again trying to rid himself of the thought fighting its way to the front of his mind.

"What? What does it make you wonder?"

"Nothing," he said tersely, his eyes flashing up to hers. "Nothing important."

"It's all important," she replied. "What does it make you wonder?"

He sighed in defeat and closed his eyes, exhaling slowly.

"I promised you honesty," Edward said. "Your mind makes dizzying jumps and puzzles out the most intricate problems so effortlessly. It makes me wonder what your mind would be like – if you were like me."

Bella blinked several times as her hand stilled over his chest, and he knew the seed was planted.

* * *

_**A/N**__: I know that not all of the puzzles surrounding the Cullens have been answered, but I wanted Alice there for that discussion. So, what did you think of their first time and the questions they _did_ discuss? What you thought it might be? Different? This is the first time I've ever tried writing vamp/human sex, so … yeah. I hope it was good for you. LOL I think I replied to everyone who reviewed last chapter. If I missed you, I am terribly sorry. I've been simply overwhelmed with the response to this story! Just know that I read everything you send to me and it means to world to me that you all are enjoying. :)__ ~Jen_

**_Special note:_**_ I will be donating the BPOV of this chapter to the Fandom Fights the Tsunami fundraiser. Also, you all voted and the winning outtake for the Mental Illness Fundraiser is . . . the first night Edward visits Bella's room from his POV. ;) Thanks so much for participating! Much love to you!_


	15. History Sewn on a Tapestry

_Do you know what's worth fighting for?_

_When it's not worth dying for?_

_Does it take your breath away_

_And you feel yourself suffocating?_

_Does the pain weigh out the pride?_

_And you look for a place to hide?_

_Did someone break your heart inside?_

_You're in ruins_

_**21 Guns**__, Green Day, 2009_

_**Disclaimer:**__ They aren't mine, but I do adore them beyond all sanity. Please respect the original parts._

_Much thanks and love to my beta team: DeJean Smith, Shasta53, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs._

_

* * *

_

Bella sat perched on a massive four poster bed that should have dominated the bedroom Edward had shown her into. It should have, except the bedroom itself was bigger than her apartment back in Forks. Even considering the strange twists and revelations of the day, she was warm and content after a long, hot shower. The terrycloth robe Alice had laid out for her in the bathroom was the icing on the cake that night, wrapping her in a feeling of homeyness.

Unlike the rest of the castle, the bedrooms didn't seem to have been renovated as much as the living spaces. Bella assumed this was because the vampires in the house didn't need to sleep. _That term will eventually get easier, sweetie_, she told herself and then shook her head. _Not tonight it won't._

Tapestries covered the old stone walls, and Bella's eyes moved over the woven pictures, trying to determine what century they originated in. The first seemed to tell the story of a man, torn from a life of poverty and thrown into a new kind of existence. Even though he was woven in stark embroidery, she knew him for what he was. _Vampire_. He was present in all but the last tapestry.

Bella heard the door click and felt Edward curl up around her. She leaned into him as she continued to stare at the fascinating tapestries. In the first one, the shining man seemed to rise above a dusty life of squalor. In his hand he held a small locket and his other arm held the carcass of a deer. His clothing was strange, definitely from another time. He was pictured with a banner flying over his head and there were words written in small script on it.

"Carlisle Cullen," she read aloud, "_Stregone Benefico_ . . . Edward! That's almost the phrase I saw in the letters!"

"Yes, Carlisle was the first of the _Stregoni Benefici_," Edward replied, his voice soft in the flickering candlelight. "It was his term for the type of vampires who feed from animals instead of humans. These tapestries tell my family's story. I thought, perhaps, you would enjoy looking at them."

She got off the bed and picked up the taper from the bedside table so that she could get closer to the enormous wall-hangings. They were far better preserved even than the Unicorn Tapestries she'd seen a few years back at The Cloisters in New York, and they filled her with a sense of awe. Knowing that they would reveal Edward's roots, tell her about the family he'd lived with for centuries, filled Bella with wonder. It was like she'd stepped into a room that could transport her back in time. And Edward was right beside her as she traveled.

"Tell me. Everything."

Her voice was muted, reverent, as she approached the tapestry of Carlisle, patriarch of the Cullen clan. She held her hand out but didn't touch the fragile fabric and waited for Edward's voice. He placed his hand on the small of her back and began his story.

"He was born sometime around 1120; even he didn't know the exact date. Records just weren't kept as well in those days. His father worked in secret for the Abbot of Cluny, seeking out those who dealt in the occult and doing away with them. Carlisle remembered various tricks that his father used to get the accused to confess. The memories haunted him."

"I don't understand," Bella said. "You said that human memories fade. How did he remember what his father did?"

Edward's pale face frowned in the flickering candlelight as he looked up at larger than life figure in the tapestry. Bella saw so much reverence in Edward's eyes; it made her wonder what kind of man this person had been.

"Carlisle is so different, holding on to so much more of his human life than any of the rest of us. I asked him once why he had chosen to keep those memories with him when it would have been easier to let them go. He told me that the memories were his penance for doing nothing to stop the evil things his father did in the name of righteousness."

Bella shuddered and leaned in closer to Edward.

"Tell me about the symbols here," she said, pointing with the taper at the locket and the deer. "I can guess at the meaning behind the deer, of course. But what is the locket?"

Edward flashed away from her momentarily, returning in an instant with a worn leather bracelet in his hand.

"Sit with me for a moment?" he asked, gesturing to the bed.

Bella sat down next to him, looking curiously at the strange piece of jewelry in his hand. It was old leather, but it had been oiled and kept soft; it had been loved. Set in the middle of the bracelet was a large black and white crest. Edward fingered the crest lovingly before handing it over to Bella.

She took it gingerly from his hand, sensing how important it was to him. The crest pictured a prancing lion atop the field of shamrocks. Above the lion's head was a hand. Below the field of shamrocks was the name _Cullen_. Bella traced the heraldic symbols and the corners of her mouth rose as she ticked off the meanings in her head.

"Do you know what the symbols stand for?" Edward asked after a moment.

"The black background stands for either constancy or grief," Bella said softly. "I'm guessing in your father's case, it might mean both."

Edward closed his eyes and smiled sadly when Bella mentioned the word "father," but did not interrupt. When his eyes were opened again, Bella continued.

"The white often means peace or serenity. This hand is a pledge of faith or sincerity. Truth and honor were the most important virtues to the man who designed this crest. The lion stands for dauntless courage, and he prances above of field of shamrocks. They stand for perpetuity . . ."

"Time without end," Edward finished quietly. "That was very good; you know your heraldic symbols well."

"Part of the job," she murmured, offering the bracelet to Edward.

He moved quickly, securing it to his wrist in a fluid motion. The dark leather stood in stark contrast to his pale skin, but it looked right on him. He sighed and relaxed back on the bed when it was fastened to his arm.

"I don't wear it for obvious reasons now, but I always feel as though it's missing."

Bella ran her fingers over his arm, brushing the edges of the leather cuff and smiling. She liked the way it looked on him, and the way he looked wearing it. He seemed happier, lighter because of it.

"No one is that observant, Edward," she whispered. "You should wear it. It's obviously part of who you are."

"You're that observant."

Bella chuckled as Edward's fingers traced over her cheeks, lighting sparks under her skin. She captured his fingers in her hand and brought them to her lips.

"But I know now, so you've nothing to hide."

"It's safer to be a Masen right now; less chance of questions," he whispered. "Though after more than four hundred years, I am more a Cullen than a Masen."

"Masen was your human name?" Bella asked.

Edward nodded and pulled gently on her hand. She followed him over to the wall where he stood in front of the second tapestry.

"That's me," he said with a chuckle.

"Which one?" Bella asked with a frown.

In the tapestry, the shining man from the first tapestry stood with his shining son, but in the background a sickly, red-headed man lay on a pallet, clearly dying.

"Well . . . both." Edward palmed the back of his neck uncomfortably as he stared up at the images. "Carlisle found me when I had taken ill with the sweating sickness. It was a fast, violent sickness that could kill in a matter of hours. He acted without thinking, wanting to save me from that kind of death in whatever manner he could."

"Did he know you – before?"

Edward smiled and shook his head.

"I told you Carlisle was different. He'd been alone and immortal for almost 400 years, but in that time he'd done some amazing things. Because he'd forsaken human blood, he found it much easier to walk among people than others of his kind. He studied medicine, and in time, he became a traveling physician. To the great surprise of his patients, he was immune to all the sicknesses. That's how he found me. He told me after I'd woken that I looked like the son he'd always wanted; it turned out that he was the father I never knew."

"Edward," Bella murmured, reaching up to cup his face.

He allowed her to pull him into her arms, and she tucked his hand under her chin the way she might have held his head had he been at all fragile. As it was, she tried to comfort him in the only way she knew how. Edward sighed heavily before lifting his head and continuing.

"When I – died – I was pretty much alone. My wife had passed eight years previously, and my parents were long gone. Carlisle really got lucky in that regard. Even with the rash of sickness, a body disappearing would have been difficult to explain to a family."

"He brought you here?" Bella asked.

Edward nodded.

"Yes. Carlisle had purchased this land about a hundred years after he was changed. There were already some legends surrounding the forest and the old abandoned castle. His presence here helped to propagate them." Edward chuckled and turned back to the tapestry. "In the early days, when it was just the two of us, we would race around the woods when we hunted. The humans never actually saw us, but there were stories about the ghosts who flew through the forest at night. It's just the way of legends . . . there's always a grain of truth to them."

"And I bet neither of you minded the superstitions," Bella continued.

"No, it was convenient. But we had to be careful. We didn't want people actually getting close to _guessing_ our secret."

Bella could understand fundamentally why it needed to stay a secret. After all, most humans were not as accepting of the word "vampire" as she had been. However, with neither of them hunting humans, she couldn't see any actual _risk_ to them. They were _vampires_; what risk could humans possibly be to them? Edward was watching her patiently, waiting for her next question.

"Do you keep the secret in order to stave off hysteria? Or is there another reason?"

He seemed a bit taken aback at her question, but he didn't pull away from her.

"Hysteria would be a bad thing, naturally," he said slowly. "Look at what happened during the witch trials . . . so many senseless killings. Humans tend to overcompensate for their fears, killing innocents far more than actual offenders."

Bella's face went blank as she thought through the implications of what Edward had just said.

"Actual – offenders? There are real – you know what? No . . . only one mythological creature confirmed per twenty-four hour period for me."

Edward laughed heartily and pulled Bella into his arms. She rubbed her nose against his chest and breathed in his comforting scent. It cleared her head and reminded her that she had a history to piece together. Edward's history. She turned, leaning back into his arms so that she could look at the tapestry again. He kept his arms around her and rested his chin gently on her shoulder. She sighed in contentment, enjoying that they could be together so naturally even after the discoveries of the day.

"Tell me about the books in the corner here?" Bella asked, pointing at the stack of volumes pictured to the side of Edward's death bed.

"Well . . . when I was human, I was a book binder."

"Ooh!" Bella crooned, turning around to look up at his smiling face. "Were you a master type setter? Or did you work the press? What was it like?"

Edward's smile got wider as her voice rose in excitement, and Bella felt her face flush in embarrassment. He ran his fingers over her red cheeks and shook his head.

"I was a laborer," he murmured. "I worked the presses all day long, but could barely read what I put together."

He hung his head slightly, but she lifted his face with her hands.

"Please don't be ashamed of your past. Besides . . . how many languages can you read now?"

Edward chuckled.

"Seven fluently, but I can get by in five others."

"Show off," Bella teased. "That must be where you got the big guns from."

"Sorry?"

"From working the presses. That's difficult labor. It must be where you got your lovely shoulders from."

Bella ran her hands under his loose shirt and he sighed.

"That and rowing. I wasn't lying when I said I rowed almost every day as a younger man."

She nodded, thankful that he hadn't lied even when he could have about his past. It meant a great deal to her to know that in every way he could be, he had been truthful. They walked a few paces to the left and stood in front of the third tapestry. In it, a beautiful brown haired woman stood in Carlisle's tight embrace. Edward was pictured above them, crouching like an avenging angel, with red eyes and bared teeth. Bella gasped and turned away, finding Edward's arms waiting for her.

"I can explain," he whispered, pain lacing the tone of his voice.

When Bella looked up at him, it was clear to her what caused his pain. He assumed she was frightened of the menacing vision of him in the tapestry. His visage was frightening, strange looking, but she was not frightened _of_ him.

"No," Bella cried, reaching up and taking his face in her hands again and bringing his forehead down to meet hers. "No, no, no. You _cannot_ always assume I am frightened of you. Give me a bit more credit, Edward."

He clenched his jaw repeatedly, and she smoothed her hand over it until he finally relaxed. He was breathing rapidly, fighting against whatever fear had gripped him when she turned away from image.

"You have every right to be afraid of the monster in that tapestry," Edward said harshly. "You told me before that you couldn't imagine me as a killer. Well I was. I killed ruthlessly, imagining my gift gave me carte blanche to indulge my lust for human blood."

His golden eyes shone in the low candlelight and his lip was curled up in disgust. Bella ran her fingers over his lips and his harsh, cool breath tingled against her skin.

"Come over to the bed with me," she commanded, turning away from him.

She walked over to the side of the bed, back straight and shoulders thrown back. When she turned around, Edward was immediately behind her. She pointed up to the head of the bed, and he moved to follow her directions. Bella crawled up the bed next to him, curling herself in the crook of his arm.

"We talk better when we're touching like this," she explained. "Now . . . tell me the story of the tapestry. All of it – not just the parts you're torturing yourself about."

Bella felt his lips tug upwards into a smile against her forehead, and she relaxed a small amount.

"Carlisle was so noble. When I first woke up, confused and dazzled by my new senses, I wanted nothing more than to soothe the burn in my throat. Carlisle took me hunting in the forest, and the animals slacked it a little . . . but the burn was still there. It was _always_ there. I looked like a devil in those first months – newborns awake with bright red eyes, and when I looked at myself . . . well, I thought I looked like a monster.

"Carlisle kept me away from the town, but naturally there were hunters. We came across a group of them one day at the worst possible time. I was hot on the trail of a female elk when the most glorious scent hit my nose. I was off after it before Carlisle could stop me. When I attacked . . . Bella, I saw my face in the man's thoughts but even that wasn't enough to stop me."

Edward sighed and rubbed his hand over Bella's shoulder before continuing.

"After that first taste, it didn't take long for me to realize that human blood made the burn in my throat ease quite a bit longer and quite a bit better than any animal blood ever could. I would try to keep Carlisle's diet for months at a time, but always I'd come across a human whose thoughts repulsed me. After the kill, I'd wonder whether the thoughts were really vile, or whether I'd simply let their blood seduce me. Either way, I remained a red-eyed devil far longer than I would have if I'd have stuck to the animal diet.

"Carlisle knew. He had to because of my eyes. But he never judged – not even in his private thoughts. It made the guilt worse, but the draw of human blood was just too great. Then one day, a woman changed it all."

Bella's breath caught in her throat at the lilting quality of Edward's voice. Their love was so new that she found it easy to dream of scenarios with beautiful, broken women crushed in Edward's powerful embrace, their blood on his lips as they died in his arms.

"You – you can tell me," Bella murmured, pressing her face to his shoulder.

Edward lifted his hand off of her arm and pointed at the third tapestry.

"That woman . . . my foster mother."

Bella closed her eyes and let out a deep, shuddering sigh, rubbing her forehead against his skin.

"I guess if I require you not to assume I'm afraid of you, I should stop jumping to conclusions about your past loves as well," Bella murmured.

"You thought – ah!"

He squeezed her gently before nudging her off the bed. They walked back over to the wall-hanging, and Edward's voice filled the room.

"I found Esme Platt in the forest one day while I was out running – she was being beaten by her husband."

Bella made a sound a violent disgust and frowned.

"I hope you killed him," she spat angrily.

"Actually, I did – though I wasn't expecting you to react quite so vehemently."

"I despise men who prey on women," she whispered, her voice full of anger. "They are cowards, and I am certain that he deserved worse than you gave him."

Bella first felt then heard Edward's low growl in response to her words. She looked up to see his brow drawn in concern as he looked at her. She shook her head.

"No, not me," she explained. "My choices haven't always been stellar but not like that. I have a friend back home . . . she just keeps going back to the asshole. Anyway, I'm glad that you were there for . . . Esme. Will you tell me more about her?"

Edward nodded, seemingly appeased that Bella had not been harmed. He reached up and cupped her cheek in his hand before continuing.

"It is a terrible story . . . at least in the beginning. Do you want to know it all or just the happy ending?"

Bella smiled and took his hand, leaning her face against his cool touch.

"I want to know it all," she replied.

He moved around behind her, keeping his arms wrapped around her waist.

"I heard her voice in my head screaming for her child. When I found her, she was very near death herself, but I saw that the child she had been thinking of was already dead." Edward's voice was hard and shaking with anger as he spoke. "I didn't think; I just acted. I . . . tortured him a little before strangling him."

"Strangling him? You didn't . . ."

"No. I didn't want any part of him in me. Seeing him in the midst of his foul acts made me realize the kind of filth I'd been . . . ingesting when I strayed from the animal diet. Cleared me of the habit right there. I brought Esme to Carlisle, not knowing what else to do with her. The moment he saw her, I knew something had changed within him. After he'd bitten her, and she woke up immortal, I saw the same look in her eyes and knew I'd brought home Carlisle's mate."

"But that's wonderful! So not only did you kill her rotten, no-good excuse for a husband, but you also brought her to her one true love? She must have thought you were a dark angel from a fairy tale swooping down to save her."

His chest rumbled with a low laugh, and he squeezed her gently.

"She would love you," he said softly. "When she awoke, she said she remembered me . . . faintly through the foggy mist of human sight. She called me her _áþéostrian beorn_."

"Dark prince," Bella whispered.

Edward nodded.

"The red in my eyes faded within a week as I stuck religiously to the animal diet. It was Esme's idea to create these tapestries and when it came to hers, she insisted on showing me as she remembered me. . ."

"Her avenging angel."

Bella looked up at him and watched as his eyes passed painfully over his parents. They might not have been blood related, but it was clear that he mourned for them as though they were his own. Bella studied them so intently that she almost missed the small baby pictured in the corner like a cherub with wings and a harp. Beneath him she saw the words _mīn __lȳtling_ upon a small grave marker. _My child._ She gasped, covering her mouth.

"That's Tate, Esme's son. Happy though she was with Carlisle, she mourned him every day."

Bella turned around in Edward's arms.

"She didn't allow herself to forget him?"

"She held onto him as though her very soul depended on it. I asked her once when she and I were alone, and she was cataloging, again, everything she remembered about Tate, why she tortured herself so. He'd been gone for nearly a century. She smiled sweetly at me, but in her mind I saw her replaying thoughts of me . . . of Carlisle . . . of my siblings. As I listened to her thoughts, she took my hand and told me, 'it's what a mother does.'"

"I can't imagine what it's like to have perfect recall of every minute detail of someone you love after they're gone."

Edward swallowed thickly and shrugged his shoulders, nodding his head toward the wall hanging.

"I wouldn't want it any other way," he murmured. "We have no idea what the vampire who erased their memory did to their ability to remember. When we get them back, I might have to tell them everything."

Bella felt the weight of the many centuries Edward had with his family in that moment and felt a renewed fervor to help him get back what he had lost. There was no doubt in her mind that she wanted to help him, but she was unsure how she could help . . . as she was. Of course, she hadn't forgotten Edward's musings from earlier in the night about what she would be like _like_ him. She'd chosen not to press him on it, reading from the look on his face that it would be a volatile discussion. She wanted to finish learning about his history first, and then she would focus on their future.

"Is this your sister?" Bella asked, clearing her throat and pulling on Edward's arm to get him moving again.

He smiled crookedly, looking at the beautiful woman in the next tapestry. She had long golden hair that had been braided with colorful ribbons and flowers. Her dress was vibrant, flowing green silk. Bella tried hard not to be intimidated by the powerful vampire looking impassively out of the picture, but it was difficult. She was stunning, but she appeared cold, detached. She held a short dagger in her hand and bunches of herbs hung at her waist.

"Rosalie," he said. "She hated me for quite some time, actually."

"Hated you? I find that absolutely absurd, Edward. How could anyone hate you?"

"Well . . . she hated this life, and she blamed both myself and Carlisle for cursing her to it. Tell me what you think of her?"

His lips were quirked into a strange smile, and Bella studied the portrait for clues about the unknown woman.

"She looks magical," Bella commented. "The way her hair is braided and the dagger that she holds . . . also, the herbs at her side. Was she a wise woman in her time?"

"She was a midwife when she was human, but more scandalous than that, she was unmarried. The townsfolk decided that she was too beautiful to be human and tried to stone her as a witch. Carlisle and I came upon her in the middle of the night. Some cloaked and hooded 'men of God' pulled her out of her bed and had gone so far as lighting the pyre for her."

"Oh God," Bella groaned. "Please tell me you didn't let them get that far?"

"No, but they had beaten her badly. Medicine and healing arts being as they were, Carlisle didn't think it likely that she would survive. While he spirited her away from the throng, I – distracted them."

"Ooh! That sounds dashing," Bella teased him. "Tell me?"

"Really, you find the most surprising things about me attractive."

"Is it really that surprising that I find your powerful, protective side attractive? I actually thought it was a little cliché of me."

Edward snorted in amusement as Bella batted her eyelashes at him playfully.

"The villagers who were under suspicion of witchcraft probably wouldn't thank me for my antics that night, but I scared the devil out of those cowards. They never saw me; but I imagine they _felt_ my presence. They weren't worth killing. Also, Carlisle and I both agreed that if we killed them, more innocents might pay for our form of justice."

"You were probably right. Those types of people generally needed very little prodding to go on a cleansing binge. But Rosalie wasn't an actual witch . . . right?"

Edward chuckled and shook his head.

"No, she was just terribly smart and terribly independent. It was kind of a dangerous combination for a woman in the year 1600." Edward looked up with a smile at his sister's picture. "You see that she didn't even want me in the tapestry. She tolerated Carlisle, but my . . . dismissal as she was waking up from her transformation didn't endear me to her."

"Dismissal?" Bella asked curiously.

"Yes, well, we didn't realize that she was beginning to process the things we were saying, though we knew she was waking. Carlisle and I were having a conversation – one-sided as was our habit. He would think and I would reply. We'd been together so long that it was just natural to us. As Rose transformed, she just became impossibly lovelier than she was as a human. I guess it was only natural for Carlisle to wonder if she and I might . . . take an interest in each other. I responded rather loudly and negatively that I had no interest in her."

Edward brushed Bella's cheeks as she relaxed minutely. She chuckled and motioned for him to continue.

"She took it as an affront that the first words she heard out of my mouth were that she wasn't good enough for me. It wasn't what I meant, and I would have been far more gentlemanly had I known that she could hear me, but alas . . . it was not meant to be. We spent many years bickering until she found her mate."

Edward walked over to the next tapestry. In the center was a mountain of a man, kilt-clad with a tartan sash slung over his naked chest. He brandished a broad sword and held Rosalie at his side. Behind him, Carlisle, Esme, and Edward stood calmly looking on. The man's eyes were more yellow than Edward's and menacing, but he had a kind smile. Bella noticed that under his foot lay a bear.

"Emmett," he explained. "My brother. Well, Rose's mate . . . but from the moment that he awoke, he was my brother. I think our fast friendship was what finally won Rose over. We still argued, but it was easier."

"So he was Scottish?" Bella asked quietly.

"He was a Scottish warrior. Rose found him dying on the battle field during the Bishop Wars in 1639. She'd been off on her own for some time, but she didn't trust herself to turn him. She brought him back to the castle and laid him at Carlisle's feet. Ever the indulgent father, he gave her what she wanted."

"But . . . if she hated immortality, why would she choose it for him?"

"He was dying, and he was her mate. Really, she didn't have a choice."

Bella was silent for a moment, staring up at the beautiful couple pictured in the tapestry. Edward came up behind her, bringing his lips down to her throat and startling her enough to make her jump. She immediately regretted her actions when he pulled slowly away from her, his head hung in resignation.

"You surprised me," she explained. "I was thinking."

"About what?"

"What would you do if something were to happen to me?"

His eyes closed almost immediately, but not before Bella caught sight of the pain. His jaw clenched tightly and his lips were pressed together in a thin, pale line.

"I will never let anything happen to you," he said through his tightly clenched teeth.

"You aren't a god, Edward. Things happen, and I'm only human after all. What would you do?"

He remained silent, eyes closed and jaw tensed. She walked over to him and stood in front of him, waiting.

"What would you want me to do?"

"Change me! Are you insane? I don't want to miss a moment of forever by your side."

She noticed the small loosening of his jaw, and she took that moment to reach up and touch his face.

"Would you consider it without my life on the line?" she asked quietly.

"We're not having this discussion right now," he said quietly.

"You can't say things like what you said earlier and _not_ expect me to think about it. I want to know how it's done, what will happen, when . . ."

"No," he interrupted, placing a single finger over her lips. "Bella, I love you, and I am not dismissing your interest. But we – I – can't talk about this yet."

"Just . . . tell me you want it," she whispered against his finger.

"With every fiber in my being," he nearly cried. "But that desire is what makes me so selfish. It's because I can't imagine an eternity without you that I wish for it."

"And what about me?" Bella asked hotly. "You want to condemn my soul to eternal loneliness? Because without you, I'm not complete."

He smiled and stroked her cheek.

"I'm not dismissing it," he said again. "I'm just not ready to stop your heart tonight."

Bella chuckled and leaned into his hand.

"I didn't even want to bring it up tonight," she admitted. "I've thought of little else since you said that, but I'd decided to hold off talking to you about it until we'd had more . . . distance? I don't know. But after what you said, I couldn't stop myself."

"I'm not angry," Edward said. "I'm just rather conflicted. It's difficult to know what part of my desire is my own selfishness and what part is wishing to fulfill your wishes."

"We have plenty of time to discuss this," Bella said with a chuckle. "Come on. Only two tapestries left."

Bella approached the last two with trepidation. She knew that the end was coming soon, the part where Edward would lose his family. She didn't want to see that pain in his eyes again; she didn't think she could bear it.

"Alice," she said quietly, "and this must be her mate."

"Yes, that's Jasper."

"Why are his eyes red?"

"He never adapted to our diet. He tried unsuccessfully because it was how Alice lived, but he'd been a traditional vampire for centuries before he met her. It was too much for him."

Alice's tiny frame was dwarfed by the imposing, tall figure of the man at her side. He was fearsome looking, with strangely adapted clothing and a predatory look in his eye. Bella shuddered involuntarily at the look on his face.

"He looks worse than he is . . . well, at least how he was. Jasper was trained by a Romanian coven as an elite warrior. He spent his first few centuries defending three of the oldest vampires ever to walk the earth."

"Coven . . . is that what you call a group of vampires?"

"Traditionally, however we always preferred family. Less militaristic."

Edward's voice trailed off into a chuckle as he looked over the tapestry. It was easy to see the devotion Alice and Jasper had for each other. She wondered what kind of power could have separated two beings who seemed so in love. Bella shuddered at the thought, her mind racing with the possibilities of who and what these other vampires were who stole Edward's family.

"I'm assuming that they weren't . . . created by Carlisle?" Bella asked.

"No, Alice saw us just after she was created. She woke up to the new life in the year 1650 not knowing who she was or how she got to be that way. Her sire – or creator – left her to fend for herself. She remembers very little about her human life, but woke up with a far better understanding of her future because of her gift. She saw both Jasper and our family and knew what she needed to do to get those things. After finding Jasper, they arrived at the castle announcing that they were home. It was . . . interesting, at the very least."

"I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when you and Alice met," Bella mused with a smirk.

"Why do you say that?"

"I imagine you were like soul mates, with two such unique gifts. It must have been fascinating to watch you have your first conversation."

"Watch is pretty much all anyone did," he chuckled. "It took place mostly in our minds. Carlisle said it was fascinating, but everyone else was annoyed beyond measure with us."

"I haven't seen you two together very much, but your connection is evident. I'm – I'm glad that you've had each other."

"I don't know that we would have survived on our own," Edward admitted. "We've kept each other sane over the past twenty years, kept each other from doing foolish things. But still, the loss was there . . . especially for Alice. I can only imagine, well . . ."

"What? Are you worried what me being here will do to her?"

He shrugged and shook his head.

"It can't be easy to see me with my . . . mate."

"What were her thoughts like?" Bella asked, ignoring the pause Edward left before the word 'mate.'

"She's happy for me – for us. But the pain is there; it never leaves her."

"So it never leaves you either."

"You're rather perceptive," he said with a smile.

"Show me the last tapestry," Bella said, taking his hand firmly in hers.

They walked over to the last wall hanging. It really spoke for itself. The colors were dark, somber, as though the siblings were in mourning. Alice and Edward's backs were turned so that Bella could not see their faces, but their sadness was evident in the way they held their bodies. Their heads were bowed together as they watched five people walked out of the frame of the tapestry toward a dark castle in the distance.

"Where did they go?" Bella asked.

"Volterra. There is a coven there, the Volturi, led by an old, vicious vampire named Aro. He collects immortal oddities and surrounds himself with the most talented members of our kind."

"He wants you," Bella murmured.

"And Alice, yes." Edward's arm was stiff around her waist, and he looked at the tapestry with a measure of cold distance. "They tried literally for centuries before . . ."

"When they came, you said that someone erased their memories. Was it another talented vampire?"

"Yes. Leo. We don't know exactly how his gift works, but it is a mental gift. He's able to break into a person's mind and steal whole sections of their memory. I can't see it as he does it though, so I'm at a loss on how to stop it."

Edward shook his head in frustration, and Bella rubbed her hand futilely on his arm.

"Did he even try it on you and Alice, or did they leave you, wanting you to follow on your own?" Bella asked.

"He tried, but something about our gifts interferes with his gift. He wasn't able to do his trick, but I read in Aro's mind that he didn't want it that way anyway. As you said, he wanted me to come willingly."

Bella stared at the bleak pictures for minutes on end, trying to will the family back to the lone siblings. Despite knowing how powerful they both were, they looked lost and powerless in the tapestry. They looked like orphans.

Soon, her thoughts moved from the sad figures in the wall-hanging to thoughts of the future. How could the documents Edward had shown her help to get the family back? Certainly she could look at them in a new light, but what would it tell them? Surely there were no coded messages revealing the secret of Leo's gift in them. What could they prove?

Bella was so wrapped up in working through the permutations that when the soft pressure she'd felt earlier against her mind started again, she brushed at her forehead in distraction. When it happened before, Bella had been focused enough to divert Edward's attention; this time, however, Bella did not think before she responded to the probing feeling that continued to press against her temple.

"Just ask me, Edward," she said distractedly. "I'll tell you what I'm thinking."

Her eyes flashed up to his as soon as she had spoken, and she knew she had taken him completely by surprise. His golden eyes were wide in shock, and he was looking at her as though she had suddenly started speaking in tongues.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "It just feels odd when you try to look into my mind. I'm not used to that."

"You can – feel it?" he asked, voice shaky.

"Umm . . . yes. I felt it first during our conversation about your diet. You were looking at me intently, so I just assumed that's what I was feeling. Were you? Trying to see into my mind?"

She felt it again, like a nudge at the side of her head.

"Are you, rather?"

Still, he stared slack-jawed and wide-eyed.

"Now you actually _are_ scaring me. Say something?"

"I'm sorry. Yes. I was. Am. You can really feel something?"

"That isn't how it works?" she asked tentatively as he ran his fingers over her forehead. "People don't usually feel something?"

"That'd be rather inconvenient, don't you think? If I routinely gave everyone a headache?"

Edward tried for a smile but only managed a grimace.

"It doesn't feel painful, like a headache." She thought for a moment before continuing. "It's like a push against my brain, gentle . . . like a nudge."

"I've never had to think about my gift before," he explained. "Thoughts pour into my head all the time. I've learned to filter them, of course, catalogue and manage who or what I want to listen to. I've never had to _work_ to get into someone's mind. So being locked out of yours has been . . . frustrating. There have been times I've tried to break through whatever is between us."

"I think when you try, I can feel it. Maybe that's just the way it is. If you've never really pushed before, you don't know that others wouldn't feel it to."

Edward was silent for several moments before his face clouded over, and his eyes closed.

"That makes bloody perfect sense," he said, shaking his head.

"What? What did I miss?"

Bella looked around the room in confusion.

"Sorry . . . Alice is on her way back, and I heard something she was thinking."

"I thought you said she wouldn't be back until morning," Bella said.

"She wasn't supposed to be, but she saw this," he said, pointing at Bella's head in explanation. "I think I know why I can't read your mind."

Bella looked at him expectantly, holding out her hand in exasperation when he didn't complete his thought.

"Well? Why can't you read my mind?"

"You're a shield."

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Dun . . . dun . . . dun. I did promise that once she knew, the action would pick up rather quickly. I wanted to explore the possibility behind Bella's gift being extra strong, being so strong, in fact, that she could feel attacks on her mind even as a human. Her gift is a bit different than it is in canon, though at the moment we don't know how. And that's all I'll say about that. ;) What did you think about the different histories? I know that was something many of you were interested in. As a note, I, unfortunately, am going to have to move to once per week posting. I refuse to sacrifice quality for speed and I'm killing myself right now trying to do twice a week. I hope you won't be too disappointed. I'm aiming for Thursdays right now. Anyway, Happy St. Paddy's Day! Ands Happy Birthday to me. lol This is my treat to myself . . . updating for you guys because I just love hearing what you have to say so much. :) Hope you all have a lovely weekend! See you next Thursday! ~Jen_


	16. Late Night Snack

_I know you've suffered, but I don't want you to hide,_

_It's cold and loveless, I won't let you denied._

_Soothing, I'll make you feel pure,_

_Trust me, you can be sure._

_I want to reconcile the violence in your heart,_

_I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask,_

_I want to exorcise the demons from your past,_

_I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart._

_**Undisclosed Desires**__, Muse 2009_

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own them, but I think it's safe to say I own this idea. Please no copying. =)_

_Much love and thanks to my beta team: DeJean Smith, Shasta53, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are amazing women and I'm lucky to call them friends._

_

* * *

_

"Wait . . . what do you mean I'm a _shield_?"

Bella's voice was quiet, but Edward could hear the tremor wavering as she spoke. He reached out to her, but she held his hands at bay. Try as he might, he couldn't stop himself from pushing just a little bit; her mind fascinated him, and all he wanted a peek at the way it worked. Her brows knitted together, and she looked up at him in frustration.

"So that _isn't_ supposed to happen?" she asked.

"No," he answered. "I've been reading minds for centuries. Never once has anyone ever said they could _feel_ my gift working."

"And you think this means I'm a – shield? What does that mean exactly?"

Edward struggled with the best way to define his conjectures and found himself lacking a plausible explanation. He knew it was possible for a person to exhibit latent immortal talent as a human, but what Bella was describing went far beyond a simple manifestation of a gift.

"I actually know very little about how or why certain vampires are gifted and others just simply are," Edward said slowly. "In our family, for instance, Alice, her mate, and I were the only ones with latent gifts. The rest were just simply immortal."

"What was Alice's mate?"

"Jasper has the ability to sense emotions. He knows how everyone around him is feeling. More than that, he can influence those around him to feel a certain way."

"Useful," Bella commented with a smirk.

Edward cocked he head to the side, curious what Bella had thought of.

"I just figured with his background in the military, as you said before, being able to affect other's moods would be highly useful."

Edward smiled and nodded.

"Jasper didn't like to talk about his years of service to the Romanians often, but he did credit his gift with keeping him alive for so many centuries."

"But this doesn't answer my question about what a shield is."

"Come on," Edward said, wrapping an arm around her waist. "We have a bit before Alice gets back. She stocked the cupboard with food this afternoon. I'll make you a light snack, and we'll talk about all of the many things I don't know."

"Oh, it'll be a short conversation then," Bella teased.

He chuckled as they walked out of the tapestry room. All in all, Bella handled his history far better than he could have imagined. Edward still felt a natural impulse to shelter her from the parts of his past that he considered frightening or painful, but he knew her well enough to understand that she wouldn't thank him for holding back details from her. Edward didn't often feel insecure, but the thought of losing Bella because of his past choices made him constantly second guess himself.

They made their way down to the kitchen. After Edward turned on the light, he walked toward the pantry. Bella walked into the kitchen behind him, sitting at one of the high stools at the breakfast bar. He walked around behind her, running his fingers down her back as he passed her. She leaned into his touch and sighed as he pulled his hand away. He grabbed watercress, herbs, cream cheese, salt and thin bread slices out of the cupboard and fridge. Bella moaned softly when she saw what he had pulled out.

"I love watercress sandwiches," she murmured.

He smiled and began assembling the small treat.

"We know of a few different kinds of talents that vampires can be born with," he said as he cut the crusts from the bread. "I have a purely mental gift. I can look into anyone's mind at any given time and see what they are thinking about at that moment. The only limit to my gift is range. I have to be within about four and half kilometers of someone to hear their thoughts. Within that radius, I can hear anyone and anything . . ."

"Except me," Bella said softly.

"Except you," he agreed with a smile. He began to quickly mash the herbs and watercress into the cream cheese as he continued his explanation. "Alice's gift is a bit trickier. She can't see inside someone's head to know what choices they're making. Her precognition is dependent on the decisions that people make. May I tell you something she saw without upsetting you?"

Edward had paused in preparations and was staring intently at Bella, however he was focused on _not_ pushing against her shield or whatever it was between them. He didn't wish to make her more uncomfortable by continually testing the barrier. She nodded at him quietly and swallowed hard.

"She saw us making love in front of the fire."

Bella blushed scarlet and let out a loud guffaw, covering her mouth quickly.

"Well that's embarrassing," she said. "I thought . . . well, never mind."

"Tell me," Edward coaxed, wielding the knife in a blur of motion as he quartered the sandwich.

"I just wondered if she saw me coming here – if she knew how important I would be for you."

"You mean, did she see that I would meet my mate when I met you?"

Bella nodded, and Edward drew in a deep breath.

"Her gift doesn't work quite like that. You see, she saw that you would be helpful with the documents, but feelings as intense as ours are for each other require an astounding number of decisions, actions and reactions, and just plain luck. Why do you ask?"

"The first time I met Alice – well, the second time, after I'd slept off my jet lag, and she came into my hotel room – she said something that gave me pause. I thought it was simply odd at the time, as so much of her behavior was that day, but knowing what I know about her, it makes me wonder."

"What did she say?" Edward asked as he handed her the plate of sandwich wedges. "I'm curious."

"She said that 'Mr. Masen isn't going to know what to do with you . . . you'll be good for him, I can see that.'" Bella paused to take a small bite, closing her eyes in happiness as she did. "For someone who doesn't eat, you're good at the preparation."

Edward smiled.

"I'd say I had centuries to practice, but you're the first human I ever thought of feeding."

Bella shook her head at his bad joke and rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, it just makes me wonder if that was the first moment Alice saw something about us."

Edward chuckled and shrugged his shoulders.

"It isn't likely that she got the whole picture just then," he admitted. "We hadn't met yet or had any opportunity to form an opinion of one another. But if she had been watching that night, she would have known my decision about two seconds after I met you."

Bella paused as she lifted the sandwich to her lips, a look of amazement on her face.

"It happens that fast?" she asked.

"I don't know if it is instantaneous for every vampire, but though I fought against the label, I knew what you were to me the minute I looked into your eyes."

"You don't like the term _mate_," she said with a half smile.

"I have a bad history with it," he said with a chuckle. "Remember, I went centuries without someone while the rest of my family was happily mated. I heard in their thoughts constantly how they worried I'd never find a mate. I began to resent the term; now, I don't mind it as much."

Bella smirked at him. He noticed that she swallowed hard and flashed over to the refrigerator to get her something to drink. He mused as he poured the glass of orange juice how much care the human body really needed.

"Thanks," Bella murmured, as she took the glass. "So the term is growing on you after all?"

Edward moved behind her on the stool and casually lifted her still wet hair off her neck, running his nose along her hairline. The glass she was holding froze in midair as his nose brushed against her skin. He peppered kisses up her neck and under her ear.

"I like the permanence of that term in relation to you," he qualified.

"Me too," she whispered unsteadily, placing the glass on the table and turning around on the stool to face him. "A lot."

He stood between her legs and watched the warring emotions play on her face, the fight between wanting to know more about his life and just wanting more of him. Edward couldn't deny how happy he was that it was an actual struggle for her; nor could he deny a moment of disappointment when she sighed and continued on with her questions.

"So your gift is mental and Alice's is . . . what would you call Alice's gift?"

"Perhaps statistical?" Edward asked as he thought about it. "Most of her predictions are based on choices and the consequences of those choices."

Bella nodded and munched absently on the last of the sandwich wedges.

"So what's a shield then?"

"And we come to the portion of the evening where I know little more than you," Edward teased, grabbing her plate and whisking it off the counter. "I've had centuries to analyze Alice's gift, but I only know of one other shield and she's . . . not a friend."

Edward turned away from Bella, wanting to hide the anger on his face. Bella made it too easy to over-share information with her. She didn't need to know about Renata's visit; it would only make her anxious. Naturally, she hadn't missed the look on his face. She crept up behind him and ran her hands up and over his shoulders, making him sigh at her touch.

"She's one of them, isn't she?" Bella asked quietly, slipping between him and the sink. "She from . . . Volterra, was it?"

Edward nodded stiffly as Bella wound her fingers into his hair, gently stroking his head.

"You didn't want to tell me about her, did you?"

He shook his head quickly, clenching his jaw as she continued to run her fingers through his hair and over his face.

"Not yet," he replied finally. "This is all happening far too quickly for my liking. I feel like you get no time to breathe from one revelation to the next."

Bella smirked and reached up on tip-toe to kiss him. Her lips felt warm and so soft against his. Edward's hands roamed to her waist, first pulling her closer to him and then lifting her gently up to the ledge of the sink. She wrapped her legs around him, but placed a hand on his chest, showing him that she didn't intend to go any further.

"I'll be the judge of what I can and can't handle," she whispered, "though I love you for trying to protect me. I won't say I've totally processed everything, but I'm not overwhelmed yet."

Edward rested his forehead against her chest, and she pulled his body closer to hers, wrapping her arms and adjusting her legs around him. He let her soothe his worry and bathe him in her warmth. Bella's pulse quickened, and Edward leaned down, laying a kiss over her heart.

_I'm a couple minutes away. Get decent._ Alice's voice broke into his subconscious just as he dragged his tongue along Bella's collarbone.

"Bloody psychic vampire!" he burst out, making Bella giggle. "She has simply the worst timing."

"I'll just go put some real clothes on then," Bella said, hopping down from the sink and running a finger down his chest. "What time is it?"

"Just past eleven, I believe."

"I'm going to call Charlie, too. Do you mind if I use your phone?"

Edward pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and handed it to her.

"We don't have a house phone," he explained.

She took the phone and looked at it, her brows furrowed as she tried to make the strange device work. He had to chuckle as she played with it, clearly unused to smart phone technology.

"I'll figure it out," she murmured, turning away.

"Bella?" he called gently.

"Yes?"

"I want you to make yourself at home here. I know it isn't home – yet, but I'd very much like it if you came to think of it that way."

When she didn't answer immediately, he wondered if he had pushed it too far, made her uncomfortable with the depth of his feelings. Finally, she smiled.

"I always wanted to live in a castle," she said, turning back around. "The whole vampire thing is a _small_ change on my knight in shining armor, however."

"Wait till you see me in the sun," he murmured, a smile quirking his lips at her light attitude.

"What was that?" Bella asked, pausing by the doorway.

"Tomorrow, if it's sunny, I'll show you."

_Ooh, good plan, brother_, Alice thought in his head. _It'll be a perfect day for that_.

Edward shook his head quickly, trying to get his sister's voice out of his mind. Bella cocked her head to the side as though trying to see what the sun would do to him that would make him like a knight. She finally shook her head and walked out of the room. Edward chuckled as he listened to her chatter to herself on the steps upstairs.

"I can hear you," he called out, loudly enough that she could hear him.

"Then stop listening," she called back in sing-song, and continued in a mumble. "Just looking for a little privacy to talk to myself about your gorgeous body, and you have to go and eavesdrop . . ."

He chortled loudly enough to make her laugh, reveling in the ease with which she navigated his many differences. As he washed and dried her dishes, he thought about how much fear he let go of in the hours since Bella had told him she knew the truth. Everything felt lighter, despite the rather dire circumstances still surrounding his family. He felt . . . hopeful.

"Hello, Alice," he said as she opened the front door.

_Hey,_ she greeted him. "Hey, Bella," she called out.

"Hey, Alice," Bella's voice called from the upstairs. "Welcome back."

Edward pinned Alice with warning glance when he saw her notion to tease Bella about their evening's activities. Alice gave him a withering look, but kept her mouth closed.

"So Renata?" Alice asked. "Diarrhea of the mouth much, my brother?"

"Stuff it, Alice," he said as she stuck her tongue out at him. "It went surprisingly well."

"Surprise, surprise. I was right . . . again."

Edward rolled his eyes.

_She'll want to know more, of course,_ Alice thought. _Lots more._

"She wants to know everything."

"It's odd, though," she commented. "I can see her possible futures. If she _is_ a shield, and that powerful, shouldn't she be shut off from me?"

"Well, your gift is based on choices. Are you able to see her choices before she makes them, like you often can with mine? Or do you only get pictures of what will be _after_ she makes choices?"

Alice thought briefly before shaking her head.

"After," she said. "But I think that's the way it is with most people. Truthfully, I don't know anyone's mind as well as yours . . . even Jasper's."

His name was a whisper from her lips, and Edward tried to look past the pain in her eyes. He tipped her chin up with his finger, smiling.

"We've always been special, eh, little sister?"

Her golden eyes sparkled up at him as she smiled back at him. _From the first,_ she thought. Her eyes darted away from his as her mind continued to race through possibilities. Edward saw that she kept coming back to her vision of Bella as a newborn. He could hear Bella talking on the phone and turned back to growl lowly at his sister.

"No." Her eyes were wide and pleading.

"We need to discuss this. You know she wants to be like us."

"She doesn't know what she wants," Edward hissed. "She barely understands what we are let alone what a future as one of us would mean to her and the life she's leaving behind. Listen! She's talking with her _father_, Alice. You want to take that away from her?"

"Don't guilt me, Edward," Alice huffed. "No, I don't want to take her human ties away from her, but this _will_ happen. It's not even just a possibility anymore; I can't see a future without her immortal and by your side."

"Not. Tonight." Edward's voice was cold. Terse.

"Dammit," Alice spat, spinning away from him in a blur of motion. "Why must you be so stubborn? I don't expect you to latch onto her jugular the moment she walks down here, but _you_ need to talk to her about this."

She flew over in front of Edward, squaring her shoulders to her full height so that her head barely reached his chin, and jabbed at his chest with her finger.

"This is the way it is supposed to be," her voice rising. "This is the way to get our family back, and I won't allow you to dismiss it."

Edward snarled and the two siblings moved quickly around the room, hissing and speaking mostly silently. They weren't truly fighting, but Alice's thoughts and Edward's decisions were at odds. When Alice showed a picture of Bella between Edward and a masked Volturi guard member, he cursed loudly and lunged within inches of Alice.

"I will _not_ allow you to barter her humanity for our family's lives, as though her _life_ isn't just as sacred."

"How dare you. . ."

Bella's voice was small from the doorway. Edward and Alice froze in their angry movements and both looked at her. She stood opened mouthed. Neither of them knew how long she'd been standing there, having been so caught up in their disagreement that they ignored any intrusion.

"How fucking _dare_ you?" Bella asked, stepping forward into the room and walking up to Edward. "You promised not to presume what I wanted, not to dismiss my wishes. Isn't that what you _just_ did?"

"Actually, he didn't really," Alice admitted, stepping between Bella and Edward. "He was just . . . arguing with my reasoning."

"Explain."

Bella's eyes never left Edward's, even when Alice was speaking. Edward stepped carefully around his sister, brushing her shoulders gently as he passed her. When he reached Bella, he took her shoulders in his hands and brought his forehead down to meet hers.

"I'm sorry if what you heard upset you," he said quickly. "Alice and I have different priorities. Her priority is the family at large . . ."

"His is you. Period," Alice chimed in. "It's the way it should be."

"I actually can speak for myself, Alice. I have over 500 years practice."

"Oh, stop with the sibling bickering!" Bella exclaimed, pushing on Edward's arms until he finally released her. "Honestly, it's the same fight my cousins have, only with . . . strange vampire mumbo jumbo thrown in."

"You're not angry anymore, are you?" Edward asked tentatively.

"Oh, she's angry all right."

"I might not have 500 years experience, but I'm rather eloquent, thank you very much," Bella said, a sardonic smile on her face.

Alice's laugh tinkled through the kitchen, and she waved her fingers over her head.

"Kiss and make up," she said. "I'll be in the library waiting to talk about shields and immortality."

Bella stood with her back to him, and Edward struggled with what to say or do. His desire to see her face winning out, he darted around in front of her and stood waiting.

"I am still angry," Bella said, her voice softer than it had been. "I don't want you to fight with your sister about me."

"Is that what you were upset about?" Edward asked, a deep sigh escaping his lips.

"Well, I was kind of put out that you seemed to be on the 'keep Bella human' team. I rather thought you'd _want_ me immortal."

Edward let out a frustrated sound and ran his hand through his hair. How to explain to her that he wanted _both_?

"I'm not on either team," he offered gently. "But I dislike the idea of using your potential talent as a determining factor. I think it's dangerous and completely unfair to you."

Bella was silent for several minutes, and Edward needed to work very hard not to try looking into her mind.

"Alice thinks I will be that powerful?"

Her brown eyes were vulnerable when she looked up at him. She'd moved closer to him, and he was again surrounded in her clean scent and her warmth.

"Neither one of us know, really," he replied honestly. "But you have the potential to be one wicked little vampire, my love."

Again, Bella stood in silence until a small, goofy grin spread across her face.

"Cool," she said with a giggle.

"Cool? That's all you have to say?" Edward smirked at her until she swatted at his arm.

"No one would ever have described me as _wicked_, Edward. I'm a bookworm. My claim to fame is that I date ancient documents. And now you tell me that two invincible vampires think I might be _wicked_? That's pretty cool."

She allowed him to pull her into a tight embrace, and Edward felt her muscles relax into him, sighing as he ran his fingers up and down her back. She brought her fists up to his chest and curled them there for a moment before banging them against him twice.

"You can't know how afraid I am that you'll decide one lifetime is enough with me," Bella whispered against his skin, her first tears burning like hot rivulets on his skin.

"Oh, sweetheart," he murmured, his heart sinking in his chest to hear her soft, desperate plea for reassurance.

He wrapped his arms ever tighter around her waist and buried his nose in her hair.

"A hundred lifetimes wouldn't be enough," Edward whispered.

He tugged ever so gently on her hair, and she tipped her head back to look at him, her tears making the pale white skin under her eyes sparkle. The same vulnerable look was in her eyes as she waited for him to continue speaking. He had no words to soothe her fears, so he spoke to them the only way he knew how.

Bella's mouth was hot and open for him when his lips met hers, a soft moan escaping as she kissed him back. She jumped up into his arms and he lifted her, flashing through the kitchen to the back pantry where he leaned her against the wall in the dark.

"Snogging in the pantry," she teased him as he kissed along her jaw and over her cheeks. "How naughty."

Edward pressed against her, breathing in her scent as she kissed him, moved with him.

"I'd do more in the pantry if my blasted sister wasn't in the library," he groaned. "Bella, please, you must realize how much I love you. Words simply aren't enough to explain how desperately I want you by my side . . . always."

Her hands shook as she placed them on his face. Her mouth moved over his cheeks, nose, eyes, and forehead, the dark making her kisses both clumsy and sweet.

"I believe you," she murmured. "It's just easy to imagine differently when you seem in favor of me remaining human." She placed her finger over his lips as he opened his mouth to speak. "I know this was different. I'm only explaining why it hurt me."

"I would do anything to save you from pain." His voice broke with emotion, and he kissed her again, hard as he dared before pulling away.

"Edward, I want to know more about this . . . gift you think I have. More about what my future might be like by your side. My heart doesn't need to stop tonight, but at least talk openly with me."

He set her down gently and kissed her forehead before taking her hand and nodding.

"Alice is waiting," he said, seeing his sister's excitement in his mind. "And she has loads to say."

"I kind of get the impression Alice always has loads to say," Bella whispered.

"She can hear that," Edward murmured, nipping playfully at her ear.

"I know," Bella breathed, giggling as Edward swept her off her feet.

"You will be dangerous, that's for damn sure," he said, shaking his head as he walked with her out of pantry.

All the while, Alice's tinkling laughter echoed in his head.

* * *

_**A/N: **__So . . . wow. Just . . . wow. When I pulled this out of the wit fit, I wasn't sure if it would get 100 reviews. So, umm, over 1K kind of blows my mind. Anyway, thank you for loving this story so much because when I tell you that it is close to my heart . . . that's kind of the understatement of the century. =) I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It's a bit of transition that needed to happen, but much will be occurring in the next several chapters. Again . . . just thank you. So much. ~Jen_


	17. Like a Diamond Set Aflame

_Where you are that's where I wanna be_

_And through your eyes all the things I wanna see_

_And in the night you are my dream_

_You're everything to me_

_You're the love of my life_

_And the breath in my prayers_

_Take my hand lead me there_

_I can't forget the taste of your mouth_

_From your lips the heavens pour out_

_I can't forget when we are one_

_With you alone I am free._

_**Love of My Life**__, Santana and Dave Matthews 1999_

_**Disclaimer:**__ Again, I don't own Edward though he does whisper in my ear. *sigh* It's lovely._

_Thanks as always to my betas DeJean Smith, Shasta53, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They are amazing!_

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* * *

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Running with Edward during the daytime overloaded Bella's senses. The wind whipped at her face and the colors flashed by her in a rainbow blur so that everything surrounding her seemed to be in motion. She could taste the air as it whipped past her face, making her hair snap behind her. And then, there was Edward – the feel of his powerful muscles moving between her legs set her blood racing. The dappled sunshine broke through the thick treetops and splashed color around the scenery, seeming to set it on fire.

He was showing off for her, and Bella loved every second of it. He continually dipped and darted, brushing ever closer to the branches of the trees so that Bella gasped with terrified amusement. When they had been running for about five minutes, Edward slowed down to what would be considered a fast human run.

"Do you trust me?" he asked, looking over his shoulder with a devilish grin.

"Do you even need to ask?" Bella retorted with smirk.

He moved quickly, pulling her around to the front of him so that her legs were wrapped around his waist, and she was facing him.

"I can't go as fast this way, but I hate hearing those noises coming out of your mouth and not being able to see your face."

His eyes smoldered as they took in her expression, and she sighed, adjusting her grip on his neck.

"You like running with me?" he asked.

She chuckled and nodded as his speed picked up.

"I do. It could absolutely turn me into an adrenaline junkie."

It thrilled Bella that Edward spent most of his time watching her reactions. She didn't even worry that he wasn't paying attention to where they were going; she found that she trusted him completely, certain that he wouldn't do anything to endanger her.

"So I can talk to you without distracting you, right?" Bella asked tentatively.

"I don't distract easily," he mused. "What's on your mind?"

"Renata – I want to know more about her. I want to know why the very mention of her made you so angry."

Edward sighed and slowed to a stop, setting Bella on the ground and offering her his hand. She took it tentatively, sensing that there was far more Edward had to say than the scant details he'd revealed the night before.

"You already know she came here looking for Alice and me. Aro, the leader of the Volturi, got around Alice's gift by leaving the decision to come after us up to Renata, whose decisions Alice was _not_ watching. That's frightening to us on many levels . . . we've always felt very safe from attacks because Alice was always watching Aro and his two brothers. We hadn't counted on them going around her."

Bella was thoughtful for a moment before asking her next question.

"Can Alice watch for another attempt of this nature? What decision did Aro actually make in order to put Renata in motion?"

"Hmm," Edward murmured softly, playing gently with Bella's fingers as he thought. "He must have made the decision to write a note for Renata. But how could Alice watch for that?"

"It's too small a decision," Bella agreed. "Can she possibly look for thoughts about the two of you?"

"Her gift doesn't work that way," Edward said, shaking his head. "She can't see thoughts like I can, and I have no intention of getting that close to them."

He shuddered, and Bella ran her hand up his arm.

"What if . . . and this might not work . . . but what if she looked for a decision _not_ to make a decision."

Edward's brows furrowed, and he stopped walking so that he could look at her.

"Can you explain that more?" he asked.

"You said that Aro knows Alice is watching his decisions so that he can't make a decision to seek you out without her knowing it. But, he might decide _not_ to make that decision. To leave the decision in someone else's hands. She could see that because it's a decision, not a thought. Is that right?"

"It's possible," Edward said thoughtfully. "Actually, it's probable, but we'll need to talk to Alice, of course."

Bella was silent as they walked through the forest, sensing that there was much more to Edward's discomfort about Renata than he was letting on.

"Tell me the rest," Bella said quietly.

"She knows about you," he said with a resigned sigh. "She knows . . . how important you are to me."

"How?"

"Renata must have been watching for a day or two before we came across her in the forest," Edward said. "I didn't know her mind or her voice, and she must have been bloody careful not to think of Aro or the Volturi . . . it would have been a dead giveaway to me."

The idea of Edward – even Alice – watching her, being near her didn't bother her. But the thought of some unknown vampire lurking around, watching her without her knowledge, made her jumpy and uncomfortable. Unconsciously, she looked around the forest for darting red eyes or flashes of color.

"She wouldn't dare," Edward snarled. "I sent her away, tail between her legs, two days ago. She won't be back."

Bella shuddered at the harshness of his voice and suddenly remembered a snippet of one of her dreams, seeing Edward crouched and snarling like a beast at an unknown threat.

"_She_ won't be back," Bella clarified. "But _they_ might. Am I right?"

"They'll never forget us," Edward said ruefully. "The point of the matter is, they didn't know about you before. And from what I saw of Renata's mind, the only thing they will know of you because of her is that you are of particular interest to me."

"Interest?" Bella asked as calmly as she could manage.

"The idea of a vampire falling in love with a human is completely beyond the scope of imagination of one of these creatures. She thought of you as a . . . delayed gratification."

"She thought I was a snack," Bella deadpanned.

Edward growled lightly and Bella chuckled and shook her head.

"When in Rome . . . right, Edward?" Bella stopped walking and took his hand. "Look, I get it. They don't. Isn't that all that matters?"

"I suppose. I just find it decidedly _unappetizing_ to speak of you as a snack."

"Really? I thought you found me quite appetizing."

"Bella," Edward warned.

"What does this mean to us?" Bella asked, ignoring Edward's warning voice.

"Possibly nothing," he hedged. "It could be that when Renata reports back to Aro, he'll just think I've reverted to the traditional diet. But . . . it could mean that they could use you to get to me."

"You mean the way they used Jasper with Alice?"

"It's slightly different with you, isn't it?" Edward asked, his voice hard and his eyes cast down. "You're a lot more fragile than a centuries old warrior vampire, are you not?"

Bella was stunned into silence; the reality of what Edward was suggesting hanging over her. He thought they could use her life – or rather, her death – over Edward's head in order to gain his fealty. She couldn't – wouldn't let that happen.

* * *

After their weighty discussion, Bella asked Edward to run with her again, trying to lighten their mood. It worked, after only a few moments of Bella's pealing laughter ringing through the forest Edward seemed more relaxed.

"Our destination is just up ahead," Edward said, slowing to a stop.

"Why are you stopping?" Bella asked.

"I promised to show you something today," Edward said, laying a kiss on her forehead. "The clearing is about two minutes in that direction."

He pointed through the trees and looked back at her.

"What? You want me to go without you? Where are you going?"

"I'll be there almost as soon as you arrive. Just . . . trust me, OK?"

Bella looked at him warily, but when he ran his fingers over her cheek, she sighed and nodded.

"You're not going to . . . like, fly out of a tree, are you?"

Edward's face went through a series of emotions before he doubled over with laughter. Instead of being angry with his laughter, she gave into temptation, simply appreciating his movements. She watched the way his hair fell over his face and the way his white teeth looked next to his pink lips. He squinted up at her, pursing his lips.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you just ask if I was going to turn into a bat?"

"Not specifically," Bella teased. "I just want to be sure. Bats are creepy."

"God, Bella, really? I don't morph into a bat."

"That's good. Because I'd really have difficulties reconciling what I want to do to you right now with any . . . bat-like tendencies on your part."

"Oh?" Edward asked, stalking closer to her and circling around her quickly before bringing his lips to her ear. "And what exactly do you want to do to me?"

Bella pushed down the natural reaction she felt to the gravelly tone of his desire and walked away from him, turning abruptly with a sweet smile on her face.

"You promised to show me something. Maybe we'll talk about what I want later."

She turned away from him, but he flashed in front of her, a wicked gleam in his eyes and an almost dangerous smile on his lips.

"We've talked about how dangerous it is to tease the vampire, have we not?" he asked, his voice a low growl.

"We have," Bella said, pleased that she kept most of the tremor out of her voice. "But I have to say, I _love_ what happens when I do tease you."

He pounced so quickly that Bella didn't even see him move, pulling her into his arms and fanning kisses along her neck and jaw line. When he reached her mouth, he paused, dragging his nose back and forth along her upper lip and then pulling away.

"Two can tease, love," he whispered before dashing away.

Bella stood alone in the forest, bewildered and gasping for breath. She looked wildly around, half expecting him to lunge out of one of the shadows. Instead, she heard his throaty chuckle echo down from the tree branches above, and she looked up in surprise to see him perched, catlike, above her head.

"Did you forget which way to go?" he purred.

He looked feral, predatory, as he balanced on the thin branch. Bella couldn't imagine crouching on something that narrow without falling out of the tree and breaking several bones.

"That way, right?" she asked, pointing in the direction he'd gestured before.

He nodded silently and she turned to go, feeling an immediate tug on her heart as she took the first step away from him.

"You won't be alone," he murmured from the tree. "I'll be right behind you . . . though you won't see me until I want you to."

She continued to walk, the tug on her heart lighter knowing that he'd be following her silently. Bella heard his dark chuckle fading as she increased the distance between them. As she walked, she noticed how silent the forest was. As they ran, she hadn't really thought about it, but padding silently along the soft forest floor, she realized that she heard no birds and few insects. She didn't hear the usual far-off crack of twigs that signaled a moving animal. The woods were eerily quiet. She couldn't help but wonder if it was because the animals sensed a higher predator in their midst.

Bella shivered at the thought of Edward as a predator. He absolutely was predatory. Everything about the way he moved, the way he almost _hunted_ her in play, reminded her of a prowling cat toying with its prey. Another shiver rocked through her, this one coiling desire in her stomach. _Fucked up, Isabella_, she sang to herself. Still, she couldn't deny the fact that the thought of him stalking her, making her his prey, was some sort of twisted turn on to her.

The clearing burst like brilliant blue and gold fire out of the murkiness of the forest. Sunshine danced over a huge field of blue bells and golden rod. Bella ran the rest of the way into the field and only stopped when she was fully bathed in the warm, golden rays. Her whole body heated through with the strong rays, and she twirled like a child, taking in the heavy smell of the flowers and the welcome warmth.

"You're stunning in the sun."

Edward's voice startled her mid-spin, and she turned to see him lurking in the shadows. She gasped as she took in his shirtless form, his dark jeans and leather wrist cuff standing in stark contrast to his pale skin.

"Edward," she murmured, her hand reaching out for him.

The ache was back, that desire to close the distance between them and feel his skin on hers, his icy touch like a firebrand on her skin. Bella took a step forward, but Edward held up his hand. His eyes were pinched, clearly pained. He was worried, and she instinctively wanted to soothe him.

"Is this going to hurt you? I don't want to see it if you'll be hurt." Her voice tumbled out of her mouth in a rushed whisper.

He laughed harshly and shook his head. "No, the sun won't hurt me."

"Why are you anxious?"

"Your reaction."

His voice was a breath of air that faded into the bright rays of the sun. Before she could answer, Edward took three bold steps into the clearing, and Bella had to squint as the refracted rainbows began to bounce throughout the clearing. Her mouth hung open as she watched his perfect skin ignite like crystals set ablaze. Her eyes roamed Edward's stomach, chest, arms, and face as he shone as though encrusted with tiny, perfect diamonds. Her vision began to swim as the tears filled her eyes; he was simply too beautiful for words.

Bella heard his pained sigh as the first tear slipped down her cheek. She blinked rapidly to get the tears out of her eyes and saw him wrapping his torso with his arms.

"No," she cried, her voice no more than a bubbling sob as she broke out into a run across the clearing.

Edward's arms were waiting for her, and she threw herself against his body hard enough to force air out of her lungs. Her hands and lips were everywhere, touching him, kissing him, almost as though her touch could absorb the doubt in his mind.

"Why are you crying?" he whispered between her fevered kisses.

Bella stopped, her hands on his shoulders and her wet eyes searching his.

"Can't you even imagine how beautiful you are to me? How magical you seem right now?"

"Magical?" he scoffed. "Bella, this skin marks me as a killer. It's perhaps the most obvious tell of my nature. It's _not_ beautiful."

"I say it is."

Edward rolled his eyes at her stubborn face, but she swiped at the tears that continued to leak down her cheeks angrily and stood her ground.

"You're an obstinate ass sometimes, Edward," she said angrily. "You expect me to just accept that you want me forever even though you seem hell-bent on keeping me human." She covered his mouth with her entire hand when he opened it to argue. "And _I do_. That's my point. I get it. I get _you_. Why is it so difficult for you to understand that I love everything about you? I don't love you in spite of your differences. I love you for what you are. For _who_ you are."

"You love me . . . _because_ of what I am?"

"Don't be daft. I'd love you no matter what you are – human, vampire, spirit – it doesn't matter. You belong with me, and I belong with you."

"So – it doesn't bother you at all that I sparkle like a prism in the sun?" he asked.

A flicker of the playful glint she'd seen in his eye earlier came back and a ghost of his smile returned. He was lightening . . . minutely, but it was there.

"A prism would be one rainbow," she teased. "You're like a thousand prisms, all perfectly formed."

He sighed and walked further into the clearing, his skin bouncing colors around as he walked and dazzling her eyes. With a sigh, he sat down with his legs crossed and looked up at the sun.

"I always hated this part," he admitted. "I love running. The mind reading is damn convenient, even if it is a bother at times. And even the hunting is fun . . . with animals, of course. But this?" He ran his fingers over his forearm and made a face of disgust. "I hate this about myself. It's a constant reminder of how different I am . . . as though I could forget."

Bella walked slowly over to him and fitted herself into his lap, wrapping her legs and arms around him. He welcomed her with a sigh of contentment, stroking her back gently with his fingertips.

"Do you want to know what it looks like to me?" she asked quietly.

He nodded, his eyes vulnerable—waiting.

"You're like the most precious gemstone," she murmured, running her fingers over his brow. "_This_ – yes, it marks you as different, but to me that makes perfect sense. You are different, so wonderfully, amazingly different. And it takes a bright light like the sun to showcase just how beautiful you really are."

"Poetic," he whispered, kissing her gently. "I still don't buy it. I miss the sun."

"It's going to be sunny all day," Bella offered, adjusting herself in his lap so that she was seated over his prominent desire. "Are we alone?"

He hissed and leaned back, letting her settle more comfortably over him.

"No one within four and half kilometers," he groaned, his lips stretching into a playful smirk. "Why?"

She rocked her hips against him.

"We should _enjoy_ the sun as much as possible, don't you agree?"

Bella pushed against his chest, and he laid back the rest of the way. She kissed along his stomach, up to chest, watching the way his skin reflected patterns onto hers. She wanted to see the way he looked, sparkling in the sunlight, as he came. Edward cupped her cheeks, and she paused in her path up his body.

"What?" she asked.

"We came here to talk," he said softly.

"And we will. We have all day, right?"

"We do," he agreed. "You . . . _want_ me like this?"

Instead of answering, Bella sat up and slowly removed her green sweater, tossing it to the side. The sun immediately warmed the skin of her breasts, and she ran her fingers down from her chest to her stomach.

"Yes," she whispered finally. "I want you like this. Do you want me?"

Edward sat up and pulled her close to him, covering her lips with his roughly. She remembered how much he liked it when her fingers were in his hair, and she immediately wound them in the soft strands, eliciting a soft moan from him as he kissed her. Their tongues moved lazily, neither of them in any rush. Edward's fingers found the clasp of her bra, and he undid it quickly, discarding the undergarment and then capturing both breasts with his hands. Bella gasped as his fingers gently massaged her, skimming her nipples with his thumbs. His hands felt so good on her skin, but he was being too soft, too gentle, always restraining his desire in fear of hurting her.

She covered his hands with hers and squeezed against them until he followed her lead, making her groan and writhe against him. Bella leaned into his hands, encouraging him to continue, and he obliged, his lips increasing their pressure against hers as well. Edward moved one of his hands away from her breast, but before she could miss it, he found her ass and grabbed. It was possessive, dominant. He kneaded her bottom, guiding her over him until she was panting into his mouth.

"Please," she gasped.

"Please, what?" he asked, stilling his hands and keeping his face out of her reach. "What do you want?"

"More," she cried.

"Of _what_?"

"You, your hands, everything."

She pulled on his hair, trying to get him to kiss her again, but he lifted her off of him and shook his head slowly. She sat beside him, panting, confused as he dragged his finger down her body to the top of her jeans.

"Off," he growled. "Now."

_Yes, sir_, she thought, scrambling to comply. Independent woman or not, she loved when Edward let himself go enough to tell her what he wanted. Partly it was because she liked giving him exactly what he wanted. More, she thought it was because she liked him telling her what to do. At least . . . in this area of their lives together. She stood, pulling her pants and underwear down and then looked around the clearing, biting her lip. They'd forgotten a blanket. Edward's expression told her he realized what they'd left behind.

"Fuck," Edward whispered, standing up and running his hand through his hair.

"It's – it's fine, really. No big deal."

"Bella, I'm not going to take you in the grass," he replied, running a hand over her bare shoulders. "You'll . . . get dirty."

Bella giggled wildly at the pained expression on his face. He wanted her, outside. That was clear enough from the warring emotions on his face. But he felt it would be ungentlemanly to take her in a way that might soil her. For some reason, Bella found this to be rather ridiculous.

"First of all, I don't care about grass stains; they wash off," she said through her laughter. "But second of all, there are plenty of ways to do this without lying in the grass."

Edward's eyes darkened almost immediately, and she knew she had him exactly where she wanted him. Naturally, he was being stubborn though.

"It's not right," he said, his voice tight.

Bella stepped closer to him, tracing over the plane of his chest and grazing his nipples. She was rewarded with his soft, purring growl.

"Edward, why would it be wrong?"

She brought her other hand to his hip and moved her hand over his jeans until she found the outline of his hardness. She traced it softly, teasing him as she waited for him to answer.

"It's . . . base," he said through tightly clenched teeth. "Rutting like animals in the out of doors."

"But you want it," she continued, snaking her finger up to his top button and popping it open.

"You deserve . . ." he began desperately, but she stopped him with a quick pull at his jean pants, undoing all four buttons in one pull.

"What's my favorite word you say?" she asked, bringing both hands to rest on his hips.

He swayed, leaning closer to her and hissed in her ear. "_Fuck._"

She smiled and nodded against him.

"Do you think a woman who likes that kind of language is so delicate that she should only be loved indoors?" She trailed her fingers up and over his chest as she spoke, slowly adding pressure with her nails as she went. "Or do you think that kind of woman might enjoy a little . . . outdoor rutting, as you say?"

"Are you trying to make me combust?" he groaned, grabbing hold of her hips roughly and pulling her against him.

"No. Just trying to get you to let go."

He lifted her easily into his arms, and she found his earlobe with her teeth, pulling the lobe into her mouth.

"I can't tell you how much I want this," he moaned, his hand roaming her back.

The chill of his hand combined with the burn of the sun made for a new and wonderful feeling on her skin. Bella arched her back into his hand as he kissed her neck and chest.

"How?" he asked, looking up at her.

His eyes darted over to a large, gnarled oak standing in the middle of the clearing. It had long lost its leaves, but the base of the trunk was wide and sturdy. She smiled and nodded. Edward darted over to the tree and leaned her against it, pressing against her. He pushed at his jeans, trying to get them off. The combination of his pressure and the rough bark was going to be a problem.

"This isn't going to work," Bella said, placing a hand on his chest. "Not like this."

Edward helped her down, and she returned the favor, helping him ease the jeans off his body. He stood before her, his entire body glowing and throwing rainbows over her, and she had to pause for a moment to catch her breath.

"We can . . . try something else?" she whispered, turning around to face the tree.

Bella placed her hands on the trunk and bent down low enough to give him easy access. His hands ran over her back, along her hips, and over her ass. She shivered in anticipation as they dipped between her legs and stroked her heat.

"Do you have any idea what you look like?" he asked, his voice dark as he continued to stroke her gently. "Bent over in front of me like that? Bella, you are going to be the death of me."

"Luckily, you're immortal," she panted, clutching the tree tighter as his fingers angled within her.

His fingers moved and immediately she felt his cock pressed at her entrance. She groaned and gripped the tree harder, biting her lip. She wanted it hard and fast, but Edward moved slowly. He grabbed her hip with one hand and wrapped the other around the front of her, his fingers teasing her breasts as he continued to thrust unhurriedly.

"God, Edward, please!" she cried when his pace stayed rhythmic and slow. "Faster."

"No," he said softly, squeezing one nipple hard enough to make her moan. "Relax."

Bella circled her hips, changing the angle slightly, and they both grunted. As he thrust, she dipped; a slow, torturous dance. Her legs began to shake as she felt the pleasure building within her. It took every ounce of restraint she had not to buck wildly against him. When he dragged his fingertips down her body and pressed against her clit she was done for. The feeling of his cool member inside her and his icy finger stroking her caused her orgasm to take her like a wave knocking her under.

Her voice crying out as she came sounded different without four walls to bounce off. As she opened her eyes and saw the flowers, the sun and the tree, it was enough to send another spiral of pleasure through her body, just thinking about where they were and what they were doing.

"Look at me," Edward's hoarse voice commanded.

She flipped her hair over her shoulder and looked back at him. His perfect face was rigid in concentration, but his lips were parted as he drew in deep breaths. Bella watched him moving within her, the in and out motion of his body moving with hers. Seeing his body, almost glowing in the sunlight, pumping behind her was the most amazing sight she'd ever seen. When his eyes flicked up to meet hers, and she felt that connection between them, the pleasure burst, and she screamed his name, pushing herself back against him as hard as she could.

Bella didn't take her eyes off of him, and she saw his eyes rolling backwards as his pace began to quicken. She felt his hand tighten on her hip as he matched her movements. Finally, he let go, her name and a string of expletives on his lips as he pulsed within her.

* * *

Edward had laid all of their clothes on the ground so that she could lay tucked at his side without the grass and flowers scratching at her skin. The sun was almost directly over them, and Edward was still throwing rainbows around the clearing. If anything, it was even more beautiful than when Bella first saw him because he wasn't upset about it any longer. He seemed content. Relaxed.

"So, talking," Bella murmured, nuzzling his cheek.

"Yes. We have lots to discuss, hmm?"

"We do. Remember what you promised me last night."

"I promised to listen," Edward said, sighing. "But . . ."

"That's not all," Bella interrupted, sitting up and leaning her arms against his chest. "No unilateral decisions."

"Right. You promised something, too."

"I promised to listen to you as well," she said with a frown. "And I also promised not to dismiss your concerns. Ground rules in place?"

"I feel like I'm attending a summit," he groaned.

"Whatever works, babe," she teased.

Edward rewarded her with a radiant smile. He rested his hand on the small of her back and covered her hand with his.

"So Alice moved kind of fast last night. Tell me what you're thinking about everything we had to say first."

"What I gathered from the both of you was that this . . . Volturi coven has been interested in your unique talents for several centuries. They tried coercion, bribery and threats, but none of those worked. In a last ditch effort, they stole your family. Their actions seem to suggest that they didn't want to force you to come; they want your willing surrender."

Edward nodded, stroking her hand with his thumb.

"We don't know that last for sure, but it seems clear from their actions. Of course, it's possible that they just don't have the resources to _make_ us come. They aren't dumb and they might realize that the only way to coerce us is to kill us."

Bella shivered and moved one hand to the side of his face.

"Alice is convinced I can be of use," she said softly.

"No," Edward said stubbornly.

"Edward, please."

"No, Bella," he replied, moving quickly away from her so that they were sitting eye to eye. "I won't discuss possible . . . tactical uses for you. Ignore for a moment that the very _thought_ of you near them makes my skin crawl; I don't want you considering immortality just to save my family."

"Well, I can't look at it _without_ considering that aspect of it," she admitted, "but that isn't the main reason for wanting you to change me."

"Oh? Care to share?"

"For a centuries old vampire, you're rather thick sometimes. You. You're the reason I want this. And, honestly, your family is part of you. So the fact that I can better help get them back as one of you is just an added bonus."

"Me?" he said with a smirk. "You know you can have me without the immortality."

"Clearly," Bella murmured, looking over to their tree.

Edward's nostrils flared, and his fingers tightened around hers.

"That's not what I meant," he said softly.

"I know. But how do you propose to do this _without_ changing me?"

"Bella, I don't care if you're twenty-nine or two _thousand_ and twenty-nine. I will always want you. I will always love you."

"Yes, and I'm more thankful than you can know for that," she whispered. "But when my body grows frail and my heart finally gives out? What then? I was serious about knowing that I'd spend an eternity missing you."

"No, you wouldn't. I'd follow you the moment after your heart stopped."

"Oh, that's clearly the more sensible option, Edward. I promised not to dismiss your concerns, but you're honestly suggesting _suicide_ as a means to prevent my change?"

"It's another option. I just wouldn't live without you."

"You don't have to," Bella said, pushing his shoulder. "What's your real hang up?"

"Bella, you haven't even asked what's involved. So you know that I sparkle like a diamond in the sun and that I can run like the wind. You know about the hunting, and you know about the hearing. Don't you wonder how I'd change you?"

Bella paused, her hands captured in his. She hadn't even taken the time to consider what it would take. She figured it involved him biting her, which she knew with absolute certainty she wasn't opposed to. From the moment he said he wanted a taste of her blood, she'd wanted to give it to him, irrational though it might be. Further than that, she hadn't really thought about it.

"How?" she asked.

Edward sighed and lay back down in the grass, motioning for her to lie against him again. She complied, stretching her body along his and snuggling against his chest.

"I'd have to bite you," he confirmed, his voice grim and clearly pained, "and then I'd have to _not_ kill you."

"You mean not drink my blood?" Bella asked hesitantly.

"Well, I'd have to take some, but leave enough so that you didn't die. The reason I'm always so careful when we're intimate to keep my teeth away from you is because my mouth is literally bathed in venom. When I bite, the venom gets pushed into the blood stream. If it's allowed to move through to your heart, the transformation would begin."

"You worry about your control then?"

"In part," he said, kissing her temple. "I told you the other night that your blood appealed to me more than most. I can't be certain what I'd do after just a taste."

"Edward, we've been through this before. You can't kill me. I think you'd literally cut your own arm off before you went too far."

"Your trust is heart-warming," he said sardonically, "but it's misplaced. Feeding induces a kind of frenzy in a vampire. It's against every instinct we have to stop drinking from our victims until they're drained."

"Maybe you need to alter your perception a little," Bella said softly.

"How do you mean?"

"Well, instead of looking it as a bite to a victim in order to gain blood . . . what if you looked at it as – the sealing of some kind of vow?"

Edward moved over her, kissing her hard and fast, his tongue moving like sweet torture in her mouth. He pulled away, leaving both of them breathless.

"Could you have possibly said something more perfect?" he asked, with a chuckle. "Now explain it?"

"Well, blood vows were rather important in your time – I mean, your human time? Is that right?"

"Nothing was more sacred," he agreed.

"Well, you can look at that bite as a blood vow between us, the beginning of our . . . immortal relationship."

"What made you think of that?" Edward asked, running his hand down her back.

"I just remembered what you said last night . . . about marriage being a human construct and mating being so much different. And, I thought about your history. I thought maybe if you looked at it like that – bite – was the beginning of that part of our lives, it might make it easier for you."

Edward looked contemplative before lying back in the grass.

"But that isn't all of it . . ."

"What else?"

"Well, the transformation usually takes a full three days . . . sometimes more. It's – excruciating. Beyond anything you can possibly imagine."

"OK, so a bite with possibility of death, and three days of more pain than I can possibly imagine. That it?"

Edward shook his head and laughed harshly.

"When you wake, you'll be a bloodthirsty newborn vampire who I probably won't be able to control. You might go on a killing rampage and decimate the entire countryside."

Bella snorted and bared her teeth at him playfully.

"Surely the big, bad vampire could stop little, old me, even if I was ten times as strong as I am now."

"You most definitely will be stronger than I am when you awake," he explained seriously. "It's the nature of the newborn phase. And you will be bloodthirsty as well."

"I'll be here. No humans in . . . four and a half kilometers, right?"

Her voice was light, but there was a measure of trepidation in her tone. She hadn't thought about the possibility of actually killing someone even though they were talking about making her a vampire. She just assumed she'd be like Edward: a vegetarian.

"At the moment. You'd need to hunt and we're not in a deserted part of the world. Humans stumble through our forest all the time. It's a definite possibility and something you need to accept. You could easily become a killer, Bella."

She sighed and leaned into him.

"To me, it's worth the risk."

"Why?"

Edward's voice was barely there, but she could read all of the doubt and fear in it.

"Because I want to be with you, as your equal, as your mate. I want to spend forever finding new ways to love you and make you happy. Because I can't imagine even a second without this." She pulled herself roughly against him, letting the feel of their bodies touching speak for her. "And because you want it as well, even though you're afraid to say it out loud."

"I do," he admitted quickly. "I want it so badly I can taste it – that was a crass pun, I apologize."

Bella giggled and nodded for him to continue.

"But you must remember: I've lost what you are considering giving up. I love the family immortality gifted to me, and I thank God for having met you, but I wouldn't have _chosen_ this life if someone had offered it to me. And I hate that in choosing me, you will give up your human family."

She sat silently, Edward's hand resting over hers on his silent chest. _Charlie_, she thought. She'd be leaving him the way Renée had, for something and someone better. But did it have to really be that way? _Maybe at first_, she thought, _just so I don't massacre him. But later?_

"What are you thinking about?" he asked.

When she looked up, his brow was furrowed and she knew he was trying to stop himself from looking into her mind. She smiled and ran a finger over his brow in thanks.

"My dad," she sighed. "I can't leave him permanently without a word or a visit back."

"You'd walk away from him for me?" Edward asked quietly.

"I love him," she said. "He's my best friend and my dad. But you're my heart as much as I am yours. Yes, I would find a way to tell him goodbye. And it would hurt him, but he would survive. Without you, I wouldn't."

"Oh, love," he murmured, stroking her hair as the tears began to fall. "How can this be right if it hurts you so?"

"There's always a little pain in a choice, Edward. You can never have it all, but I can't have both you and Charlie. And I choose you."

"I hate this," he whispered. "I hate that because of what I am, you need to make a choice like this."

"It isn't so different than if I'd just met you over here," Bella mused. "It's what I'll tell him when I go back; that I've met the love of my life, and I'm going to stay with him. He'll be happy for me; you'll see."

"I'll see?" Edward asked.

"Well, you're going with me, right?" Bella teased.

He sighed and pulled her over him so that her head rested on his chest.

"Is this your decision?" he asked solemnly.

"Yes," she replied without hesitation. "This is what I choose."

He closed his eyes and lay still, neither moving nor breathing, and Bella became anxious. _Did he even _need _to breathe?_ She didn't know. She waited an interminable amount of seconds before framing his face with her hands and bringing her lips to his. He kissed her back immediately, and then opened her eyes.

"You stopped breathing," she said.

"I don't need to," he replied. "Breathe, that is. Well, only to talk. I was thinking."

"About?" Bella murmured, biting her lip in trepidation.

"The best way to do this," he said.

He pushed her hair back over her shoulder and his black irises centered on her jugular. The look of want in his eyes gave Bella her first thrill of both fear and excitement. Edward was going to change her.

* * *

_**A/N:** Nom nom nom. No, I kid. He isn't going to nom her in the meadow. But he seems a lot more willing than in canon, hmm? It was very important to me that these characters be sensible in their approach to this. They've each spent a lot of time alone (relative to their lives: Edward as an immortal; Bella as a human) and they know what they want. They want each other. Also, it was important to me that this choice be made **without** a knife hanging over them. Yes, the Volturi threat is there; but I wanted it to be mostly about **them**, if that makes sense. Anyway, the nomming will not happen immediately so we'll get to see more library time, with Edward being far more open with Bella about the nuances of vampire reference in the documents they will examine. Hope you will enjoy that and the discoveries they will make. ;) Also, a HUGE thank you to **Funmbie** and **The Fictionator's** for featuring TFP as one of their picks of the week last week. Can't thank you enough for the lovely review! :) Till next Thursday, my lovelies! ~Jen_


	18. Carlisle's Journals

_If you could only see_

_The beast you made of me_

_I held it in but now it seems you set it running_

_Screaming in the dark_

_I hunt when we're apart_

_Drag my teeth across your chest to taste your beating heart_

_My fingers claw your skin, try to temp my way in_

_You are the moon that breaks the night for which I have to howl_

_My fingers claw your skin, try to tempt my way in_

_You are the moon that breaks the night for which I have to howl, howl._

_**Howl**__, Florence + the Machine, 2009_

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own Twilight *sniffles* – but I do have one of the leaked screencaps of Robward breaking a headboard. *ded*_

_Much thanks to my betas, DeJean Smith, Shasta53, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. They keep me in order when no one else can. You see, it takes a village after all. ;)_

* * *

Aside from forgetting the blanket, Edward realized he also hadn't thought to bring lunch for Bella. They had to leave the meadow far earlier than either of them wanted, arriving back at the castle early in the afternoon.

Alice had been busy while they were gone, arranging the most secret of the family's documents in the library so that Bella could finally get the full picture. Alice's mind was in a state of frenetic activity, even more excited than usual. She'd also been cooking.

"Mmm," Bella moaned as she stepped inside. "Steak and ale pie!"

"You should be flattered," Edward murmured, kissing her temple. "Alice hates touching human food."

Alice appeared in the doorway wearing a pink striped apron and brandishing a large wooden spoon. She favored her brother with a withering look and then turned her gaze to Bella.

"It's just about ready," she said. "Come out to the kitchen."

"Really, Alice, thank you," Bella said, almost skipping over to Alice's side. "Steak and ale pie is my favorite. However did you – never mind. Psychic."

Bella laughed and waved her hand in front of her face dismissively before threading her arm through Alice's. The two women walked ahead of Edward chatting idly about lovely day, but Alice's thoughts were focused on speaking to Edward.

_Does she even realize how well she's taking all of this? It's kind of astounding, really._

"I know," Edward whispered, too low for Bella to hear.

_It could bode well for her transition._

Edward remained silent, still unsure of how to deal with the range of emotions he was feeling about Bella's impending change.

_I'm proud of you, by the way. You did better than I thought you would . . . and that's saying something._

Edward chuckled and whispered his thanks to Alice.

"I'm going to give you ladies some privacy," Edward said, flashing over to Bella's side and kissing her cheek. "I'll finish up where you left off, Ali?"

"Perfect," she said, shooing Edward away with her hands. "Bella and I have _loads_ to talk about."

While Bella walked with Alice into the kitchen, Edward stood and watched the two of them until they disappeared around the corner. They could be sisters. Though Bella's long legs and flowing brown hair were different from Alice's shorter stature and spiky, dark hair, they were natural together. It seemed to Edward that Bella fit into Alice's life almost as effortlessly as she had fit into his.

From the library, he could hear them talking and laughing in the kitchen. In his mind, he could hear how enamored Alice was of Bella's intellect and rational thoughts. It pleased him to know that his sister was impressed by Bella. He trusted Alice to always be the yin to his yang and knowing that she more than approved of his choice made it all the more sweet for Edward. He turned toward the precious documents and scraps of evidence he and Alice had gathered over the twenty years since the Volturi took their family, feeling the memories flood his brain as they always did.

_They'd been on a family hunt. It had been years since all seven of them had gone hunting together; usually the couples would go alone, seeking the privacy that only the outdoors could afford them. Edward and Emmett were racing ahead of the others when he heard the strangled panic in Alice's inner voice._

"_Stop!" Edward called to his brother. "It's Alice . . . she's seen something."_

_The only member of the family out of Edward's range was Jasper, who was hunting nearer to the village. In deference to the family's gentler tastes, he always sought his human prey outside of Edward's hearing. Most times, Edward was thankful for that; that day, however, it was the first in a series of misfortunes that led to the final disaster._

_In a matter of seconds, the six of them stood in a circle in the middle of a clearing facing away from each other. They were on guard, waiting. Alice's vision was confused, constantly changing, and she was frightened. Edward couldn't understand why Jasper wasn't at her side; of all of them, he was most in tune with her feelings. It was strangely foreboding not to see him dashing toward Alice._

_When Jasper finally arrived, flanked by the Volturi guard with his red eyes blazing and blood dripping from his chin, Edward felt the first chill in nearly five centuries rock through his body. What he heard when he focused his attention on Jasper's thoughts nearly brought him to his knees. Jasper recognized none of them. He looked at the group of six vampires, now standing as one against the oncoming band of Volturi specialists, and analyzed them. He was dissecting each of their appearances, mentally calculating which among them would be the easiest target._

_Edward growled and crouched when he read in Jasper's mind that he had chosen Esme as his first target._

_It never came to a fight. Aro stepped in front of Jasper, petting his arm as though he was a favored lapdog, and fixed Edward with a haughty stare. He gave Edward just enough time to read his intentions before gesturing mildly behind him._

I'm going to take what's rightfully mine now, Edward, _he thought._

"_Leo," his cold voice murmured, "if you'd be so kind."_

_A vampire Edward had never seen before stepped to the front of the guard. He was small, built compactly and almost delicately, with white blond hair and an angular face. His lips were twisted into a grin of satisfaction as he surveyed the family in front of him. Edward strained to hear Leo, to ferret out what kind of gift the vampire might possess, but all he could hear was a garbled mess of confusing sounds; there was nothing close to coherent thought._

_Leo raised his arms and touched his temples lightly with his fingers. The air around Edward seemed to stir, and he felt Alice at his side, her voice frantic in his head as she puzzled over Jasper's cold expression. Without warning, Leo flashed forward and stood just in front of the family. He brought his hands together in a thunderous clap and all at once, the family's thoughts changed from angry and fearful to puzzled._

"_What have you done?" Edward roared, grabbing at Leo and ripping a bit of fabric from the dark Volturi cloak he wore._

_Leo hissed and made to engage him in a fight, but Aro gave the command to stop. Leo froze in mid-lung,e and Edward waited. Alice cowered beside him, beginning to rock back and forth and whisper Jasper's name, but the rest of the family looked around the clearing in bewilderment._

It took two sentences from Aro to convince the rest of the family to join Jasper across the field and go with the Volturi. Alice and Edward were left alone, watching as their family walked slowly, as though dazed, away from them. Aro gave them the choice to come willingly with the only people they loved – he even promised to have Leo restore their memories – but neither Alice nor Edward could stomach the implications of that choice. In the end, they stood holding each other as the group marched away. The only tangible reminder they had of that day was the scrap of cloth Edward saw laying before him in the library.

Edward's fingers caressed the innocent looking black fabric as though he could travel back in time and stop Leo from erasing his family's memories. He hadn't learned _what_ Leo was until more than a year after when he spoke with Eleazar, one of his oldest and most trusted friends. Eleazar explained that Leo could erase whole sections of a person's memory, though neither of them could understand why he had been ineffective on Alice and Edward.

"Alice, that was simply amazing," Bella said as she and Alice entered the library. "How did you and Edward learn to cook so well?"

"We're just naturally good at everything, Bella," Alice teased. "It's one of the perks of immortality."

Alice winked at her and squeezed her shoulder gently.

"Something to look forward to, then," Bella said with a laugh.

_Then it's true,_ Alice thought immediately. _The future has been shifting like mad all afternoon._

"Yes," Edward said stiffly. "It is."

"What?" Bella asked, coming over to Edward's side. "What did I miss?"

"I was asking Edward if you had really convinced him about changing you," Alice said softly.

Bella looked up at Edward, and he felt her hesitancy though he could not read it in her mind. She reached up and smoothed her hand over his pinched brows, and he relaxed under her touch, smiling and nodding at her.

"Yes," Bella replied. "I've convinced him."

_She knows your soul, Edward_, Alice said in his head, _as intimately as she knows her own._

"She _is_ my soul," Edward murmured, pulling Bella close to him.

She sighed and rested her head on his chest while he looked at Alice who was smiling sadly at them. Edward rubbed his hand over Bella's back quickly, and she looked up with an expectant smile.

"Alice tells me you have a treasure trove in this library," Bella said, rubbing her hands together dramatically. "Let's get started."

Edward chuckled and walked Bella over to the long table where the books and letters had been carefully arranged, along with Edward's and Alice's notes. Bella reached absently for the pair of white gloves Alice had laid out for her along with her reading glasses, her eyes darting from one thing to the next as though trying to decide what to touch first.

"Do the same rules apply here?" she asked suddenly, turning around to face Edward.

"Same rules? I'm not sure I understand," he replied.

"Must I ferret out all the answers myself, or will you give me some background to work with now?"

Alice smirked at her brother, thinking again how effortlessly Bella fit into their family. Edward shook his head at Bella and gestured with his hand at one of the books.

"This one is a series of journals that I purchased yesterday. They are all Carlisle's and span a time frame of nearly 300 years, though there appear to be many missing."

"Do you know the starting point?" Bella asked, reaching for the first journal.

"That is the earliest one, and it dates from the 1750s. It covers a two year period."

"How do you know?" Bella looked up at Edward quizzically, her fingers moving gently over the cover of the book.

"I was there when he wrote it," Edward said simply.

"Ah," Bella murmured.

Her gloved fingers moved over the spine of the book, pausing at each groove and divot in the supple casing. Her eyes traveled over the rest of the books, all bearing varying degrees of wear.

"This one, at least, is in good condition. Do you know where it was stored?"

"It, along with four of the other journals, left Carlisle's hands in the late 1800s," Alice said. "We were visiting friends in Alaska, and Carlisle met up with some of the local healers. He offered the old medical journal in trade for some of the traditions that the men could pass down to him. He naturally told the men that it was from his father, but both Edward and I believe that the shamans and healers knew Carlisle was something more than he let on."

"Their minds were quite amazing," Edward continued. "They saw the group of us; there were five of us on that trip because Rose and Em were off on their own. They immediately thought _upyr_, which is the Slavic word for vampire, but they never mentioned their suspicions and dealt with Carlisle as though he was a respected shaman in his own right."

Bella sat down with the book, carefully opening the cover. Carlisle's tight, exact writing was inside, and Bella ran her fingers lightly over the script.

"Hello, Carlisle," she whispered.

Edward smiled at the Bella's familiar routine, but Alice watched in awe as Bella familiarized herself with the writing and style contained within the book.

_She's brilliant, isn't she?_ Alice asked.

"Completely," Edward whispered.

_She's going to solve this, Edward. I just know it._

"You've seen it?" He was careful to keep his voice too low for Bella to register.

_Her future is really hard to focus on right now_, Alice said. _But I've seen this_.

Alice's vision flooded his mind. Bella sat in the large leather chair in the library, her dark hair hanging over the arm of the chair and Carlisle's journal open in her lap. Her red eyes scanned the text greedily and the perfect white skin of her brow was puckered in deep thought. Suddenly, she leaped from the chair, the book falling to the ground as she called out Edward's name. He saw himself come running to her side, and she smiled at him. But then the vision faded.

_That's where I lose it every time. It's as if the decision to tell _you_ is what is uncertain._

Edward felt worry trickle down his back. He knew Bella valued honesty more than anything; she hated the times when he had to keep things from her. Therefore, he was having difficulty coming up with any scenario in which she might willingly choose to keep something from him. _Unless_ . . .

_What are you thinking?_ Alice asked worriedly.

Edward could see more of the future shifting in her mind as he thought over the possibility. There was only one reason that Bella would choose to keep information from him: to protect him. He could see Alice coming to the same conclusion and her yellow eyes narrowed on his.

_You know what you need to do, Edward_, she thought immediately. _What we both need to do . . ._

Living with Alice's thoughts in his mind meant constantly straddling the line between the present and the future. Most times, it was easy enough for him. He'd grown used to the difference between Alice's thoughts and her visions. Dealing with a future that included an immortal Bella ultimately making a choice that might put her in danger in order to save him was a quite different situation. Edward didn't know how to react, whether he ought to discuss this with her immediately or whether he ought to hold his tongue and trust her to know the right course of action.

_Do you trust her?_ Alice asked, a deep-set frown on her face.

He didn't need to respond to the question; a look was all it took. Alice's voice was calm, yet rapid in his mind, hurrying to make him understand and come to the same conclusion as she had.

_You already know that nothing you can do will change her mind once she's made her decision. The _safest_ thing either of us can do is put it out of our minds. Don't think about it. And if the time comes that either of us think she's hiding something from us, we need to let her. It's the only way . . ._

"What have you found?" Edward asked as he walked behind Bella, running his fingers across her shoulders and under her hair.

"This is fascinating," Bella said, turning the pages with great care. "Carlisle was a meticulous surgeon and some of his cases were truly incredible."

"He saved a lot of people," Edward agreed.

"He doesn't spell it out, but it seems like his vampire speed and senses helped in diagnosing and treating many of his patients. Some of the things he talks about, like the smell he noticed coming from cancer, couldn't have been perceived by human senses."

"Carlisle believed that he owed reparation for the sins of his predecessors," Edward explained. "While he, himself, never partook of human blood, vampires for centuries fed on humans. He strove to make amends in the only way he knew how – by using the gifts immortality gave him to heal others."

Bella was silent for several moments, absorbing the histories contained in the journal, and Edward watched her, admiring the patience with which she approached her studies.

"I can't wait to meet him," she said finally, looking up at first Edward and then Alice. "Can you tell me about the rest? There are a lot more journals here than the five you said were left with the Alaskan healers."

"Some of them were in Carlisle's possession when the family was taken," Edward said, pausing and looking up at Alice.

"We believe that some of them were written . . . after."

Bella stood up quickly, almost tipping the chair over in her hurry to get closer to the table.

"Then that's where we begin," she said quickly, the color rising in her cheeks. "If we can determine without a doubt that Carlisle wrote these while with the Volturi, we might find some clues that we've been missing."

"We don't understand how they could have gotten out of his possession," Edward explained, touching her back. "We can't be sure that these aren't just a grand hoax meant to get our hopes up . . . or worse, trap us. After all, doesn't it strike _you_ as odd that so many journals by the same vampire would come to be collected together?"

Bella drew her lip between her teeth and gnawed on it.

"One of my profs in grad school told me to assume that everything is a forgery until science had proven it genuine," Bella said thoughtfully. "With the earlier journals, we have the benefit of your first hand knowledge to verify the authenticity. With the rest . . . well, this is no different than any other investigation I might begin. I will assume the worst until I can prove the best."

"How much help do you want from us?" Alice asked, stepping forward and grabbing Edward's arm behind her back, squeezing lightly.

_Remember . . . trust her._

Edward initially felt a prickle of irritation at his sister's redundant mantra. Of course he trusted Bella; there was no one, save Alice perhaps, that he trusted more.

_Don't get indignant on me, Edward_, Alice thought as Bella considered the question. _I know you and how you like to think you know best. This time . . . it might be Bella who knows best._

"Well, certainly I want you to tell me what you know," Bella said, pursing her lips in thought, "but as for using your gifts . . . perhaps it will be best to let the documents speak for themselves. At least at first?"

Her brown eyes lifted up to Edward's, her face betraying her hesitation and her need for reassurance.

"I think that's the wisest course of action," Edward said with a smile. "Even _our_ senses can be fooled, but science should have the first crack at it."

Bella's whole body seemed to relax at Edward's words, and she smiled with a clear sense of relief. He stepped forward as she placed the journal on the counter and took her into his arms. Her soft warmth radiated through him and as he felt her relax into his embrace, he realized just how worried she must have been about his reaction.

"I trust you," Edward whispered into her hair. "I told you when we first met that you would be essential to me; I believe that now more than ever."

"I just . . . I don't want to disappoint you or Alice. So much is riding on this investigation."

He stroked Bella's hair and looked at Alice over her head. Alice was looking off into the distance as she scanned the future. She was taking Bella's suggestion and looking for a decision not to make a decision.

_We have almost three months before he even considers us_, Alice said. _You need to take her to her father in the next day or two so that we can get the transformation underway._

Edward wasn't prepared to hear talk of a deadline. Though Bella had convinced him of her desire to become like him, he hadn't convinced himself that he would be able to do so without killing her.

"Edward?" Bella called, rubbing his back urgently. "What's wrong? You're . . . squeezing me."

He released her immediately, and she looked up at him with worry in her eyes.

"What did Alice show you?"

He swallowed on reflex and looked her calmly in the eye.

"She showed me when your . . . transformation would need to occur."

Bella looked from Edward to Alice expectantly.

"When? Is there time for me to see Charlie?"

"Of course," Alice said, coming over to stand next to Bella. "But in order for us to be prepared for if . . ."

"When . . ." Edward interrupted.

"Yes, when the Volturi choose to come for us, we need to get you immortal . . ."

"And less fragile . . ." Edward interjected, earning a frown and a smack from his sister.

"As soon as possible," Alice finished.

"So when?" Bella asked.

Edward couldn't be certain if he heard only excitement in her voice, or if there was a measure of fear in it as well.

"We'll leave for your home tomorrow or the next day. Will a week be a good amount of time?" Edward asked.

Bella sighed deeply and pushed her hair back out of her face.

"Doesn't seem like very long to cut all of my ties, does it?" she asked with a smile. "Yes, if I can't do it in a week, I guess no amount of time would be enough . . . don't you think?"

Edward closed his eyes and tightened his jaw, fighting with the desire to beg her to reconsider. It was against every instinct within him to allow her to make a choice that would inevitably hurt her, but he knew that it was ultimately her choice.

"If you can't, there's nothing holding you to coming back," he said softly, opting to give her an option should she need it.

"Except you," Bella said with a smile, touching his cheek. "I'll be able to do it."

Bella asked to work with the journals on her own for the rest of the afternoon. Edward and Alice busied themselves around the castle, trying unsuccessfully not to speculate about what her discoveries might mean for the long-term fate of their family.

* * *

Unsurprisingly, Bella was ready for bed rather early, almost directly after the late supper Edward prepared for her. She allowed him to tuck her into bed, weakly asking him to join her as her eyes stubbornly refused to stay open.

"We'll have an eternity of nights where you _don't_ have to sleep," he whispered, kissing her forehead. "Enjoy your dreams while you still can."

She sighed and burrowed deeper under the covers.

"Do you miss it?" she asked sleepily.

"What?"

"Dreaming. Do you miss dreaming, Edward?"

Her voice was thick and on the cusp of sleep.

"I used to," he murmured, stroking her hair softly. "But not any longer."

"Why?"

"Because you are my dream, Bella."

She sighed happily and her body relaxed fully into the bed.

"Love you," Bella whispered. "So much."

"Always."

Edward closed the door softly behind him, though he knew Bella wouldn't stir. His thoughts were heavy as he walked down the stairs toward the foyer. He hated leaving her, but he needed to hunt. Alice was waiting for him at the bottom of the steps, a panicked look on her face. The vision she was showing him shocked him badly, though in a strange way it made perfect sense.

"You're thinking about taking a human?" Alice gasped. "Are you fucking _nuts_?"

"I didn't know I was thinking about it until you showed me that vision," Edward said sourly. "Ever think that your visions influence people in the wrong ways, Alice?"

"You know exactly how my visions work, so don't try to blame your poor choices on me, brother."

The vision was startlingly raw and unfiltered, as though Alice was adding her own details to the vision in order to bring Edward fully into it. He saw the woman's face, her look of drunken stupor as Edward stalked up to her in the alley. Edward saw himself crooning to the woman, drawing her further into the darkened alley. And then he saw himself strike, grabbing her and flying with her through the night to the forest where he took his time in killing her, drawing out her suffering as he tested his own willpower.

"You admit it makes a certain amount of logical sense," Edward said, crossing his arms casually.

"To kill a random woman . . . no, I'm sorry . . . _torture_ a random woman just to satisfy your doubts? No, Edward. I fail to see any redeeming value in that."

"I don't know if I can do it, Ali," he said quietly. "I don't know if I can stop."

"I do," she replied, her voice significantly less acerbic as the future began to bump and blur as Edward's choice wavered. "And what's more, Bella does as well."

He closed his eyes and nodded.

"I need to hunt regardless," he said.

_Go_, she thought.

Edward moved to go past her, but she pulled him into a bone crushing hug.

_You're better than that choice, Edward_, she thought. _You'll never forgive yourself if you do it._

The future was still wavering, and he knew he couldn't yet give a truthful answer to Alice. He couldn't help but think that there _was_ some value in the choice, even if it meant a great deal of guilt.

Edward ran through the night like a demon possessed once he was out of Alice's grip. He broke through hanging vines, tore divots in the ground, and even uprooted a tree. No matter how hard he pushed himself, he couldn't outrun the feelings of inadequacy when faced with the prospect of sinking his teeth into Bella's flesh.

Aside from her immortality, the feral monster within wanted her blood. He wanted to taste that warm, heady mixture of lilac and honey on his tongue, feel it coursing down his throat until it was pulsing within him. He wanted to consume her completely, own her, and feel her life within him.

He violently took a doe, draining her in seconds and throwing her to the side. Her limp body struck a tree, and he tore off away from her before stopping. Centuries of hiding what he was called him back to her broken body. Edward dug her grave and gently laid his kill within. Could he do the same with the woman he'd seen in Alice's vision?

Edward took off until he reached his meadow, which would from that day forward be Bella's meadow. He sat beneath their tree and stared at his stony hands, thinking of the havoc they could wreak on a human body – on Bella's body. He could rip her apart. His teeth could slice her. He could drain her. So many ways that he could end her life.

In reality, that's what she wanted. Only, she wanted him to stop short of snuffing out her life entirely and give her immortality. So easily said, yet Edward understood it was not so easily done.

When he looked at the choice to "practice" on another human weighed against the prospect of killing Bella because of a lack of control, the choice was clear. He'd massacre a hundred humans to save her. He would feel guilt most definitely – remorse at perhaps stealing someone else's beloved – but to him the guilt would be worth it.

The execution of said practice, however, left much to be desired. Edward knew what he would need to do. First, he would need to choose a victim. It wouldn't be difficult; the world was rife with criminals fit for the taking. The trouble wouldn't be in finding the victim or even in luring her away from the well-traveled roads. The trouble would be in biting, drinking, and _stopping_ – the very issue he was worried about with Bella. He would need to torture the poor woman by stopping, allowing the venom to burn her for a few moments while he tested his control. It was cruel, but if it would prepare him better for biting Bella, he would do it.

Edward was up and running toward the nearby village, thoughts still swirling through his head as he slowed his pace. It was dark, but early enough that there would still be plenty of people around. Edward knew human nature well enough to know that he would find a greater percentage of the kinds of people he was looking for out at this time of night than he would during the day. It wasn't long before he spotted her.

The recognition of her face was immediate though he had never seen her outside of Alice's vision before. She was drunk, as Alice had predicted, and her name was Bree. She wasn't vile, like many of the men and women he'd killed in the past, but she was no angel. As an added bonus, he saw that she had no mother or father. If he killed her, no one would come looking for her immediately.

Edward drew the navy pea coat around his body and flipped the collar up around his face to blend in with the humans who were reacting to the chilly evening air. He walked hunched over, eyes downcast, so that he didn't draw attention to himself. To a passerby, Edward looked like a well dressed man headed home from the pub.

In reality, he was hunting.

He stalked her to the edge of the well lit main drag where she stumbled and then turned into a deserted alleyway. It was almost too easy. Edward walked past the alley Bree went down and darted into the next opening. When he was sure he was unseen, he leaped up the side of one of the buildings to the roof where he moved silently until he could see Bree again. She was thinking of how to find her next trick and of someone else. Someone named . . . Riley.

Edward froze as he was about to leap in front of her, realizing the weight she put on the man's name. Bree wasn't a hardened prostitute who turned tricks for sport and robbed the men she slept with. She was a kid, hardly out of Secondary School, who was struggling to make ends meet for herself and her boyfriend the only way she knew how. She'd gotten drunk in an attempt to numb herself . . . before.

Edward sat down silently on the roof, letting Bree walk out of the alley and toward the red light district only a few blocks away. The guilt and disgust washed over him as he thought about what he had almost done, what he had contemplated doing.

_For what?_ he asked himself.

Taking blood from that – child – would have been nothing like drinking from Bella. It would have been a weak imitation of the allure that Bella's blood held for him. Nothing could ever hope to prepare him for that kind of assault on his control; thinking that torturing that poor girl before killing her would help him in anyway was simply a delusion born of his own fear.

No. The only thing that would save him was his love for Bella. He had to trust in it as much as Bella did if he hoped to conquer his bloodlust.

As Edward strolled up the long walkway toward the castle, he pulled out his phone and found Jenks' name in his contacts.

"'Lo," a groggy voice said on the other end of the line. Edward could hear the man floundering for his glasses on the night stand.

"Jenks. Masen here."

"Uh – ah, yes, of course. Mr. Masen. It's been many months, sir. To what do I owe . . ."

"Tickets to Washington State, a town by the name of Forks, and a passport for myself. By tomorrow if you please."

"Mr. Masen, that's a very hefty order," Jenks' oily voice oozed over the extension.

"I trust it's not out of your ability," Edward said coolly, "for the right price, of course."

"When do you wish to fly?"

Jenks was all business once Edward made it clear money wasn't an object. _The fool_, Edward thought. He should have known better after all of the dealings they'd done in the past.

"Tomorrow evening on the red eye. The next morning at the latest. First class, of course."

"One ticket?"

"Two. For myself and my . . . fiancée. Isabella Swan. Her paperwork is already in order."

"Congratulations, Sir," Jenks offered noncommittally. "I will leave the paperwork and the tickets in the usual place."

"You'll find your price waiting for you," Edward said.

He heard Jenks begin to blather on the other end of the line but hung up on him before he could get going. All of the necessary details were taken care of. The only thing left was readying himself for the rather monumental task that lay in front of him: severing Bella's human ties and then making her immortal. But first, he would need to deal with his sister.

_I knew you wouldn't kill her_, Alice chided as she met him at the door.

"Bloody psychic."

* * *

**_A/N:_**_ So ... did I get you? Did you worry that Edward was going to snack on Bree? I just felt like this was a logical progression in his acceptance of his control. I actually wondered whether canon E ever considered it to test himself. Anyway, he rightfully realized that it would be a mistake. So let's summarize: We know that the Cullens are with the Volturi and that Leo stole their memories. What are your thoughts about how Edward, Alice, and eventually Bella might be able to get them back? I'm anxious to hear what you're thinking, especially now that you've seen how they were taken. Hope you continue to enjoy! As an aside, we've recently had a death in the family. Updates on both this and ATJ might be a bit delayed in the next week or so because of that and an upcoming trip I'm taking. Thanks in advance for your understanding. :) ~Jen_


	19. Going Home

_Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road_

_Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go_

_So make the best of this test and don't ask why_

_It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time_

_It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right._

_I hope you had the time of your life._

_So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind_

_Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time_

_Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial_

_For what it's worth it was worth all the while._

_**Good Riddance**__, Green Day 1997_

_**Disclaimer**__: I do not own Edward, Bella, or Charlie. But I now own a pair of skinny jeans. I'm rather proud of that, actually. ;)_

_Many thanks to my beta team: DeJean Smith, Shasta53, Swimom7, and SparklyBabs. Seriously, these women rock._

* * *

Bella began rearranging the tiny bottles in her personal mini bar as soon as she and Edward took their seats on the plane. They were the first thing she noticed, lovingly caressing the familiar green necked bottle of Jameson whiskey and playing with the red cap. She wanted to crack it open and chug down a dose of courage before the engines whirred to life, but she knew the rules all too well. No drink service until after liftoff.

"Bella, love," Edward murmured playfully, arresting Bella's hands as she began arranging the bottles for a third time.

She looked over at him. _Damn him and his perfect, immortal features. _She felt like a vagabond walking next to him through the terminal, bags under her eyes and worry lines all over her face. He looked completely at ease.

"Worried?" he asked, flashing her a smile.

Bella scowled and pulled her hands away from his, turning instead to fish her iPod out of her carry on.

"You know full well I'm more than worried, Edward," she said. "I'll be better when we take off and I can crack that whiskey open."

She heard the familiar sound of the seal breaking on the cap and turned around to see Edward pouring the whiskey into a rather nice looking glass.

"Edward," she hissed. "What are you doing?"

"Pouring you some whiskey," he replied evenly.

"But . . . you're not allowed."

Edward raised his eyebrows at her, handing her the glass.

"First of all," he whispered, leaning over so that his lips brushed her ear, "there isn't a man on this plane who could stop me. And second of all, you're flying first class, my love. There're different rules here."

Bella looked between the sparkling amber liquid in the glass and Edward's warm amber eyes. The colors were remarkably similar.

"Cheers, Bella," Edward said, leaning over and kissing her cheek.

"Bottoms up," she replied with a sigh.

The first spark on her tongue was like a golden fire, and she closed her eyes to the bitterness. _I'll miss this_, she thought idly. _I wonder what blood tastes like . . ._ She shook her head and took another sip. Almost immediately, she could feel the alcohol working through her bloodstream, releasing the enormous tension in her shoulders.

"Better?" he asked.

"Marginally," Bella muttered. "I'll be better in approximately nine hours."

She brought the glass to her lips but was surprised to feel Edward pull it out of her hand. With a blur of movement, he brought his hands to either side of her face, placing his fingers over her temple.

"I want you to focus on my face," he said.

As he spoke, she both heard and felt the engines rev to life. Immediately, her entire body tensed.

"Bella, stay with me."

Edward's face hovered close to hers, their noses almost touching.

"Are you trying to hypnotize me?" she asked shakily.

His golden eyes seemed even deeper, warmer as she looked into them.

"No," he murmured, intentionally fanning his cool breath over her face. "I'm . . . luring you. Isn't that what those papers called it?"

She breathed him in, and her heart rate spiked but in a far more pleasant way. She felt her muscles relax even more than they had with the whiskey. Bella was high on Edward. The thought made her giggle.

"Why are you laughing?" he asked in a calm voice as the plane began to move.

"You're making me drunk," she accused with a simpering tone to her voice. "You're . . . dazzling me."

Edward smiled wider, showing just the barest hint of his bright white teeth. Bella felt her heart stutter. _Bite me_, she thought wildly. Edward's face darkened considerably and suddenly Bella was fully aware of how fast the plane was moving – aware of the increasing whine of the engine. At any second it was going to make that first leap off the runway.

"Edward," she whined, clutching at his wrists.

"Shh," he hushed immediately, smiling at her and breathing into her face.

She sighed and relaxed against his hand, almost able to ignore to worry line still present between his eyebrows. After several moments, Edward reached over and unlatched her lap belt.

"Lay your head on my chest," he whispered. "You need to sleep."

Bella pressed her body close to Edward's and found a comfortable spot on his chest. She snuggled against him, breathing in the comforting mix of mint and rosemary spiciness she'd come to associate with him.

"I never sleep on planes," she murmured, stifling a yawn.

"You do when I'm dazzling you," he replied, stroking her hair.

Bella could feel her eyes growing heavy. She hooked her fingers around the loose collar of his shirt, caressing the cool smoothness of his skin and yawned again.

"So many other fun things we could be doing for nine hours," she murmured sleepily.

Bella felt Edward adjust himself in the seat, and she chuckled against his chest, finally closing her eyes.

"Sleep, Bella," Edward said in a mockingly dangerous tone. "Have lovely dreams for me."

"Oh, I will," she whispered dreamily, breathing in his heady scent again.

And she said no more.

* * *

"I still can't believe I slept for the entire flight," Bella said after they were seated in the sleek sports car Edward had rented for their trip. "I never sleep on planes."

"Yes, well, you've never had your very own vampire to dazzle you, have you?" Edward purred as he leaned across the console.

"Rather handy," Bella murmured, kissing him. "It's pretty early, but I'm wide awake and well rested. What do you want to do?"

"We can go out to breakfast for you . . . or we can go to your apartment?"

Bella noticed the way that Edward's brows rose hopefully at the end, and she smiled.

"You're anxious to see my place, aren't you?"

"I am," he admitted readily. "Almost as anxious as I was for you to see my home."

"Let's go there, then," she said happily. "Probably the best place to start, anyway."

Bella tried to hide the sadness in her voice, turning to look out the window as Edward pulled out of the airport parking lot.

"It's okay to be sad," he said softly, reaching over and taking her hand. "I'm not going to consider it an affront if you are sad, nor am I going to try to talk you out of this. I know you've made up your mind; you don't need to hide your emotions from me."

Bella turned and smiled, letting the tear slip down her face.

"Thank you for that," she whispered. "I know that this week is going to be difficult for _both_ of us. And that's okay too. Just know that I pick you, no matter what."

Edward gave her hand a small squeeze and turned back to the road.

"Now I know you don't have these roads memorized," Bella chided, chuckling softly.

He looked over at her sheepishly.

"No," she said, shaking her head in disbelief.

"I needed something to do on the flight while you slept," he said. "I memorized the map of Washington including the most up-to-date road map."

"Show off," Bella said with a frown. "I expect you know exactly where you're going then."

"I'm sorry," he replied.

Bella looked over at him, and he looked genuinely hurt by her reaction. She reached over and took his hand again, swirling her thumb in his palm.

"I was just kidding, Edward," she said gently. "Your photographic memory _is_ a bit of a sore spot to me, though."

"How so?"

"I would have killed for that in college and grad school!" she exclaimed. "But in all seriousness . . . I wasn't upset. And you shouldn't immediately think that I am, either."

"Your tone was . . . brusque."

"And your feelings are close to the surface as well, no?" Bella prodded.

"That too," he agreed after a pause.

They drove the rest of the way in silence while Bella drank in her surroundings, soaking it all up as they passed through the many small towns. She felt as though the car was driving her through a moving picture of her childhood.

"Look over there, Edward," she called.

He slowed the car down considerably and looked where she was pointing. It was just a lot, empty and paved over with grass growing through the broken sections of cement.

"There was an ice cream store there when I was six," Bella said softly. "Charlie took me there for a scoop just after Renée left."

Edward's cool hand covered hers, and suddenly he was comforting her.

"Do you want to talk about her?"

"You mean do I want to see her?" Bella asked, squeezing his hand.

He nodded silently.

"No," Bella said firmly. "She never bothered to say goodbye to me; I don't need to show her that courtesy."

The car sped away from her childhood memory, but Edward's hand continued to cover hers.

"You don't want to leave your life with regrets, Bella." His tone was grave, and she could see the shadow of memory flash across his face. "You have the chance now to either burn or cross all of your bridges before you end your mortality; just make sure you choose wisely."

Bella thought for a moment before stroking his fingers gently and smiling at him.

"That bridge was burned long ago and not by me," she explained. "I can't cross something that isn't there, Edward."

"It makes me irrationally angry that she left you," Edward admitted. "I know that's a terrible thing to say. She is your mother, and I don't know her at all. But I can't imagine someone weighing the choice to leave you or not and choosing _wrong_."

"I love you for that," she said with a sigh. "But I had a wonderful childhood. Don't focus on Renée; I want you to love Charlie."

"I will," he assured her. "If only because you do."

* * *

"Your apartment . . . smells like dog," Edward said, wrinkling his nose.

"That'll be Jake," Bella smiled. "My boy."

"You have a dog?" Edward asked.

"Yeah. Hmm . . . wonder how Charlie is going to feel about inheriting a son. Wonder how Jake will feel about it. Oh! Is that going to be a problem? Like . . ."

"Like . . . am I going to kill your dog? No. Dogs taste unsavory."

Bella shuddered and then shook her head.

"So, this is home," she said after a long pause. "It's not much, but it works for me."

"Lots of books," he whispered, running a finger along the spines. "Not surprising. _This,_ however, surprises me. Where did you get them?"

His eyes rested on the two Celtic Goddess statues Bella had arranged on her bookshelf, the only two knickknacks that were allowed to occupy the precious space on her shelves.

"Ireland," Bella said with a smile. "They're different representations of the Goddess. I like this one the best."

"The Spiral Goddess," Edward said softly. "Do you know what it means?"

"Of course," she said, narrowing her eyes. "Why would I have it in my house if I didn't know what it was? It's the wheel that turns us through life, the movement of our lives. It's a constant path that we travel."

"I like this one," Edward said, his fingers lingering on the other wooden statue. "The tree of life."

"Why do you like that one?" Bella said with a smile.

"It is what you are to me, Bella. The trees used to represent She who Reclaims Life; it's what you've done for me since the moment we've met."

"Reclaimed your life?"

"My humanity," he corrected, reaching out and caressing her cheek.

* * *

Bella had spoken with Charlie before their flight and told him that she was coming home with big news; much to Edward's dismay, she neglected to tell him who she was bringing with her and how important he was. It was unsurprising to her then, when they got in the car to visit Charlie, that Edward appeared nervous and uncomfortable.

"It's going to be fine," Bella assured him again.

"In my experience, fathers never truly like the men who steal their daughters from them."

"I don't believe that," Bella countered immediately.

"Bella, I'm a mind reader," he reminded her.

She shook her head stubbornly and set her jaw.

"Just because you can read minds doesn't make you an expert of emotions. I think the relationship between a father and daughter, especially Charlie and me, is more complicated than mere thoughts. Besides . . . you should have the upper hand at least. You _can_ read his mind."

"I _should_ be able to read his mind," Edward said. "I can't read yours; there's nothing that says I'll be able to read his."

Immediately, Bella began to ponder over the nature of vampire gifts, tapping the steering wheel as she pulled out of her parking lot and turned toward Charlie's house. Were they hereditary? Could it be that the gift would get stronger or weaker as it went from parent to child? She voiced her questions to Edward who sat silently for several moments before answering.

"How could we know?" he finally asked. "I can think of perhaps one set of vampires who are biologically father and daughter and neither are talented in any way. We don't often get the chance to study the nature of gifts _before_ someone is turned, especially not in relation to one's family."

"Perhaps I can be a little experiment for you, then," Bella said thoughtfully. "If Charlie's mind is blocked, that is."

Edward shuddered at the mention of the word experiment but otherwise held his counsel.

"We'll just have to see," he said.

Charlie's house, the house where Bella had grown up, was only a few miles from her apartment. She turned into the short drive and pulled up next to Charlie's police cruiser. Edward seemed quieter than usual, and Bella noticed the way his golden eyes traveled over every detail. She wondered if he was memorizing them for her, so that when she forgot things, he would be able to remind her.

"Ready?" she asked.

"No, but we don't seem to have much choice."

"Please don't be dramatic, Edward. It doesn't suit you."

She rolled her eyes at him and placed a light kiss on his lips.

"Charlie will love you because I love you," she added. "I know that _here_." She placed her hand over her heart and smiled. "Come on."

Edward moved slowly even by Bella's standards. She smiled to herself that he was nervous. To her, it was just one more reminder of how important she was to him. He wanted to impress Charlie because even without her saying it aloud, he understood how important her father was to her. She cradled Edward's hand gently when he arrived at her side and favored him with a warm smile.

"Thank you for doing this," she whispered.

"Coming with you?" he asked.

"Everything," she replied decidedly. "It's not just this; it's everything, Edward."

He sighed, and she felt the tension release a bit in him. Her words had the intended effect; he'd remembered the most important detail—she loved him.

Bella heard Jake first, and her heart leapt in her chest. She'd missed his brown eyes and soft fur more than she'd allowed herself to realize. She moved faster, eager to open the door and have Jake bound into her arms.

The door creaked as usual, and she heard Charlie stand up as though he hadn't been waiting with bated breath for them to walk up to the door. The only thing missing was Jake's thundering footfall as he galloped to meet her.

"Hey, Dad . . . where's my boy at?"

Bella craned her neck, looking for Jake's chocolate body to come hurtling at her. That was when she saw him, cowering in the kitchen and looking at her warily as his brown eyes darted to the man – _no, the vampire_ – beside her.

"Oh," she murmured, finally remembering.

She couldn't hide Edward's secret from her best friend; Jake knew instinctively that she was bringing a predator into the house. Charlie stepped in front of the dog and leveled Bella and Edward with an equally wary gaze.

"Hey there, Bells," he said evenly. "This your surprise?"

Bella smiled radiantly, too widely she was sure, and nodded vigorously.

"Dad, I want you to meet Edward Masen. He started out as my boss in England . . . now he's quite a bit more."

She gave Edward's hand a reassuring squeeze, but Edward was already stepping forward, his dazzling smile in place as he extended a hand to Charlie.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Chief Swan," he said with the gentle English lilt in his voice. "Bella has spoken so highly of you."

Charlie frowned and ignored Edward's hand, instead looking directly at his daughter.

"How much more?" Charlie asked her.

"He's everything, Dad," Bella said simply.

She walked past Edward and into her father's limp, unsure arms, the arms that offered awkward comfort and constant security as Bella grew up. She buried her nose into his shoulder, breathing in the clean, familiar scent of Old Spice and felt the tears prick at her eyes.

"Love you, Daddy," she whispered against his stiff shirt, not caring if he would think it odd.

"You bet, baby doll."

Charlie's voice was thick, but resigned. Charlie knew his daughter well enough to hear the finality in her voice. Edward was it for her, and there was really no use in arguing with her about it.

Bella released Charlie and walked past him, slowly approaching Jake. He whined and stepped back, lowering his head and tucking his tail between his legs.

"Oh, you dumb dog," Charlie said, exasperated. "Don't you know your own mom? Come and get Bella, boy."

Jake seemed to think about it for a minute, and then lay down in the kitchen, looking up at Bella sadly. She walked over to him slowly, getting down on her knees before she reached him and holding out her hand to him. He took a few tentative whiffs of her hand and whined again.

"Oh, Jake," she whispered. "It's still me, boy."

His tail thumped weakly, and he scooted a little closer to her. When Bella plunged her fingers into his thick, brown coat, she felt the tears well up in her eyes. Jake whined a little as he nudged her hand gently with his nose. She felt his warm breath on her hand as he sniffed her, taking her new scent – the scent of Bella mixed with Edward. Jake pulled away and sneezed explosively. He didn't try to sniff her again and it made Bella's heart ache.

Jake's behavior really brought home to her how much she had changed in just the week that she had been gone. She wasn't just Bella anymore; she was Edward's Bella. As fine as _she_ was with that change, she was beginning to realize just how much that changed things for those she loved before Edward had walked into her life.

"Damn dog," Charlie muttered, eyeing Edward to see his reaction. "Wouldn't recognize his own tail if he ran into it in a darkened room."

"I'm certain it's just the shock of a new person," Edward commented, keeping his head down.

"Maybe," Charlie said gruffly. "Change never appealed to either Jake or me. Bella's always been a little different."

Bella smiled at her dog, her best friend, who was still watching Edward with uncertainty. She didn't think that Charlie particularly _liked_ Edward, at least yet, but he seemed to at least accept him. That was as much as she could hope.

* * *

"Dad, be reasonable!"

It was nearing the end of her stay in Forks, and Bella was bustling around her father's small kitchen, tripping over Jake as she carried ingredients to and fro. She was making dinner for the two of them while Edward was "out." They'd explained to Charlie that Edward had business to attend to while in Washington. In reality, Edward was hunting and then staying out of Bella's hair for the night so she could finally get Charlie to let go.

"You be reasonable, Bells! You've only known him a week, and you're moving across the ocean for him? What if that pasty rich boy gets tired of you? What are you going to do then?"

Bella sighed as she continued to stir the risotto and rolled her eyes.

"_Edward_ is not going to get tired of me. We plan to make a home for ourselves _together_. I fail to see what part of this concept is difficult for you to understand."

"You're giving up so much," Charlie said.

He banged his hand on the table so hard that both Bella and Jake startled. Jake gave a soft woof of protest before laying his hand down on his paws. He was lying directly behind Bella, guarding her most likely.

"What's he giving up?" Charlie asked quietly.

How could Bella explain to him that Edward had to give up so much to even _agree_ to the life she'd proposed for them? _Yeah, Dad. He had to give up five centuries of the closely held belief that he was incapable of finding a mate. He also had to convince himself that he wouldn't kill me when he bit me to turn me into an immortal vampire_. No, that wouldn't be the best way to endear Edward to her father.

"Dad, I told you our feelings for each other are very complicated." Bella's voice had the tone of one who had said the same things many times. "Neither of us expected to fall in love with each other; neither of us were looking for that. But I'm not walking away from it now that I've found it."

Her voice had risen as she spoke, and she had turned around, facing her father with her wooden spoon held perilously in her hand. Jake picked his head up to look at her. He glanced at the door, took a whiff of the air, and when contented that the smelly guest who made his nose twitch wasn't anywhere in sight, he laid his head back down.

"You love him?" Charlie asked, voice calmer and eyes darker.

"Yes," Bella replied, lowering the spoon and tilting her head to the side. "I love Edward, Dad."

"Why couldn't he have been from Seattle? Shit, Bells, even Los Angeles wouldn't have been as bad as England!"

Bella smiled and turned back to the risotto.

"You're going to miss me," she said, at peace finally with her father's reaction. It finally made sense.

"Well, of course I'm going to miss you," he replied, a note of disbelief in his harsh tone. "You're all I got, baby doll."

Her heart swelled at the childish nickname that he only used when the feelings became too intense for him to handle.

"I love you too, you know?"

She looked over her shoulder at him, and his face colored as he nodded.

"You bet."

Bella stifled a snort and nodded happily. The discussion was over, and she knew she had won.

Later that night after Edward had joined her in her apartment and they had made love, their conversation drifted toward Charlie and their impending departure.

"So were you ever able to get more than an impression from him?" Bella asked with hope in her voice.

"No – he's still very fuzzy to me. I can hear him, but it's as though I'm listening underwater."

"That's a little disappointing," Bella admitted, sighing. "I was hoping to be certain."

"Certain about what? I got the impression that you were certain he'd accepted your choice."

"I am. It's just – the guarantee of you hearing it in his mind would have been nice."

Edward rubbed her shoulders as she thought over the past few days with Charlie. She'd had so many lasts with him. It was difficult to think that in a couple of days she would be leaving for England and possibly never coming home again.

"Did he put up much of a fight?" Edward asked, holding her close and trailing his fingers up her arm.

"Charlie knows me," Bella explained with a sigh. "He knows when I'm wavering on a decision and when I've made up my mind. He knew the discussion was over before it even started, I think."

"What were his concerns then?"

"Missing me," she whispered. "I knew that was going to be rough, but I don't think it's going to be as bad as I thought it would be . . ."

"What do you mean?"

Edward's lips pressed gently against her temple and Bella snuggled as best she could against his stone body, sighing at the contact.

"I think Charlie's found someone." She heard the giggle in her voice and let it out. "I never would have guessed it before, but he talked about a girl who just joined the local ENT squad . . . let's just say I recognized the tone in his voice."

Edward was quiet for some time, and Bella replayed her father's face as he talked about the cocky younger woman who had just moved up to Forks from San Diego. There had been a soft smile on Charlie's face when he'd spoke of Leah, and Bella had thought that, perhaps, he admired more than just her ability in the field. She'd let it slide the first few times he'd woven her name into the conversation, but when he'd commented that Leah liked her coffee the same way Bella did, Bella had given him a knowing smile.

"_Dad, have you told her you're interested?" Bella asked, setting her fork down._

"_I don't know what you mean," Charlie said gruffly, grabbing his beer and chugging it._

"_You like her," she teased. "Did you ask her for coffee?"_

_He frowned and squirmed uncomfortably in his chair._

"_Yeah, I did."_

After prying details from him, Bella had found out that he'd been seeing Leah off and on for a month. It had been going on right underneath her nose, and Bella had never been the wiser. She felt a pang of sadness at how little attention she'd paid her father's feelings. He was always so sturdy, but looking at him through the eyes of a woman in love, she realized that he'd been lonely since Renée left.

"I think this Leah will do him good," Bella said with finality. "And I think she made it easier for him to let go."

Edward smiled against her forehead as she settled herself in his arms. She was drifting, and she knew she'd be asleep in minutes.

"I hope he's found what we have," she murmured.

"I hope that for him as well, love."

The soft lilt of Edward's voice lulled her closer to the edge of dreams.

"Thank you for accepting him," Bella said as she drifted. "You don't know how much it means to me."

"Yes," Edward said heavily. "I believe I do."

* * *

**_A/N:_**_ I'm so, so, sorry about the delay, but with the way last week went ... yeah. I just couldn't do it. But I thank **all**__ of you for your kind words regarding our loss. It was a comfort to hear your words during that time. The end of last week was remarkably better than the beginning. I got to spend the weekend with my girl, swimom7, and two other great friends, savage woman and belli486. It was SO amazing! :) I hope you enjoy this chapter and the developments therein. In reference to the Leah/Charlie thing: I believe in keeping most of the canon relationships in tact, but I confess that I never really liked Charlie with Sue. They're just too similar in that they are just steady, go with the flow type people. I think that Charlie with a slightly older Leah could be really awesome. And they will come into play later in the story, but I should warn you that there are no wolves in this story. Since the Cullens don't live in Forks, there was nothing to trigger the gene that set young men to turning into wolves. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. I promise to get to review replies this week. So sorry about missing them last week; I just didn't have time to reply and still write. Thanks so much for your patience. :D ~Jen_


	20. A Scottish Lass Comes Avisiting

_I let it fall, my heart  
And as it fell, you rose to claim it  
It was dark and I was over  
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me  
My hands, they were strong, but my knees were far too weak  
To stand in your arms without falling to your feet_

**_Set Fire to the Rain_**_, Adele 2011_

_**Disclaimer**__: I didn't create these characters; I just bend them to my will. *insert evil laugh*_

_Mucho thanks to my beta readers, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. Also, my love and thanks all of my readers for their patience during this stressful and difficult time. I appreciate all of the well wishes sent my way; my family and I thank you._

* * *

As Bella again slept through the transcontinental flight, Edward pondered his most recent discovery about her gift. On the flight to Washington, when Bella had imbibed in some of the whiskey and he'd used his lures on her, he heard her voice clearly in his mind for the first time. It was shocking, considering what he'd heard her say: _Bite me_. He'd seen her intention clear enough in her thoughts. She wanted to feel his razor sharp teeth digging into her jugular. Luckily for them both, Edward's dark look had brought whatever veil hung between them back into place; her thoughts were provocative enough to tempt even his careful control, and he was glad to have them go away.

After careful consideration, he decided against telling Bella about the temporary breech in her shield. He knew that it must have been a combination of her fear, the alcohol and the effects of his lures. But he had no answers for her about why it had happened or, more importantly, what it meant for when she was immortal. The very thought that there was a way to penetrate her shield filled him with fear. If there was a chink in her mental armor, Leo or one of the other Volturi could find it and use it against her. It had made him question all of his surety about their plans for her transformation.

Naturally, Alice had seen him breaking through her shield, his resulting distress, and called him the moment she saw he'd be alone. Edward was able to predict her advice as though _he _was the psychic. _Trust Bella; forget the rest._ As he told her, that was easier said than done.

"So, are you going to tell me what you've been thinking about?" Bella asked as he slipped into the driver's side of the Viper. "You've been chewing your own cud since we left Sea-Tac."

"I'm sorry – did you just say 'chewing my own cud'?"

"Yes, it's something Grandmother Swan used to say." She frowned at his look of incredulity. "She grew up on a farm. It means . . ."

"I can gather what it means," Edward said with a smile. "Why do you think I was worried about something? As I recall, you spent the majority of the flight asleep."

Bella leveled him with reproachful look. "Don't play coy with me, Edward. I know you, and I know when you're worried about something."

Edward felt the familiar buzz in his pocket, telling him that he'd received a text message. He knew without even pulling out the phone that it was from his sister. As he started the car, the phone buzzed again, and he sighed. Bella was watching him, waiting for an answer, but he smiled and held up one finger. Two messages from Alice showed on the screen, and he reluctantly clicked on the icon.

"Bet she's telling you to tell me," Bella said, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Are you a psychic now as well as a shield?" Edward pursed his lips in mock irritation. "Yes, she says I should tell you. She also wanted to tell me to stop ignoring her texts."

"How many did she leave you?" Bella's face was a mix of reproach and interest.

"Only two. She saw me ignore the first, and it irritated her."

"It's _got_ to be a pain to have a psychic as a sister."

The phone buzzed again with another message from Alice. Bella clapped her hand over her mouth, and her eyes widened. Edward couldn't help but smile; getting used to Alice's visions had taken him centuries.

"Alice says it's also bloody useful, and you'll do well to remember that. Her words; not mine."

"I didn't see that coming at all."

"It takes some time," Edward admitted. He put the car into gear and took off toward Thetford, eager to get back to the documents and the possibility that they could make more headway before Bella needed to be changed. The three of them had agreed to wait another two weeks before beginning Bella's transformation, if only to give her more time as a rational human to look at the documents. Not even Alice could know how long it would take for Bella to regain control once she was a newborn.

"You didn't distract me," Bella said smugly, breaking into his thoughts.

"Of course I didn't," he replied evenly. "When have I ever been able to distract you from something you wished to know?"

"I'm single-minded," she said. "What's troubling you, Edward?"

"I heard you," he whispered.

Edward waited, knowing that she would be working through the possible meanings of what he'd said.

"You heard what I said? Or you heard my thoughts?"

She was always quicker than he gave her credit for, and he gave her more credit than any other person he'd ever encountered—including Alice. To say that she amazed him on a daily basis was a huge understatement. Bella amazed him almost every time she opened her mouth.

"I heard your thoughts. It was only once, and it was while you were both slightly inebriated, and to use your words, 'dazzled' on the flight over to the US. I don't think it's anything to be concerned about . . ."

Bella held up her hand, and Edward immediately paused in what had become uncontrollable rambling. He could recognize the panic creeping into his voice as he tried to explain to Bella that she wasn't in danger. The problem he had was that he wasn't entirely convinced that she was safe.

"It was just that once?"

Edward nodded immediately, keeping his eyes on the road so as not to meet her gaze. He was slightly embarrassed with himself for being cowardly about telling her.

"Had you been trying to listen to me?" Bella's voice remained calm, without a hint of the anger he knew she was capable of.

"No, not that time. It came totally out of the blue."

"What did I say?"

Edward closed his eyes, remembering the way her voice sounded in his mind. Many would think that a person's inner voice matched their speaking voice. Bella's inner voice was clearer than her speaking voice, full and resonant like a perfectly pitched bell. He'd recognized the irony of his comparison immediately. The pictures her mind had created for him were more vivid than most other people's thoughts, stemming from how closely tied he was to her. It was the same with Alice's thoughts: because Edward knew her mind so well, it was as though he was _in_ her head, thinking with her, instead of simply watching a movie-like projection of her thoughts. He'd thought it would take some time to develop that bond with Bella, should he ever be able to see her thoughts, but the connection was there immediately.

"You thought the words 'bite me,' and then you gave a rather graphic show of _why_ you wished me to do so." His voice was pained as the perfect memory flooded his mind. Every nuance of her vivid imagination came back to him. He gripped the steering wheel tighter, hearing the way the leather protested beneath his stony hands.

"I remember that," Bella replied. "Well, I remember the look on your face just after . . . I'm sorry, Edward."

The tone of her voice pulled him out of the memory, and he released the steering wheel. His fingertips found the satin skin of her temple and he ran them back, through her hair. "There's nothing to be sorry for, love. We simply need to understand how pervasive this breech is."

They were getting closer to home, and Edward wanted to be finished with this discussion before they saw Alice again. His sister could be even more single-minded than his lover.

"You're worried about after the change." Bella's hand found his, and she squeezed gently, encouraging him.

"Naturally we can't really know what your gift will be like after, though we assume it will only get stronger."

"If I had to wager a guess, we will need to worry most when I'm hunting." She was analyzing, her voice detached as she thought through the situation. "From what you and Alice have said, that will be when I am most distracted, correct?"

"Yes, but . . ."

"But, that's all we can know for sure." Bella cut him off and patted his hand. "And even that's a guess. Alice won't know how I'll react because it isn't a choice, and to guess could lead us astray. If my research has taught me nothing else, it's that guessing only causes confusion and delays in the long run. Patience and caution when the time comes is our best bet."

"Patience, when it comes to your safety, isn't exactly in my nature."

Bella smiled warmly at him, but Edward couldn't return the warmth. He felt cold, more so than he should have. The uncertainty was not something that he had planned on. He'd planned on perfection when he changed Bella; the thought that there would be unknowns frightened him more than he wanted to admit, even to himself.

* * *

Edward heard the unexpected voice in his head as soon as the car got within range of the castle. He recognized it immediately, but let out a gasp of shock nonetheless. It was unlike Alice to invite company without telling him in advance. What could she have seen to make her surprise him in this way?

"We have company," he said, his voice flat and emotionless.

Bella's fingers gripped his and he heard her heart rate spike with fear.

"Who?"

"An old friend." Edward gently rearranged her hand so that he held it within his, rubbing his thumb soothingly against the back of her hand. "I'm sorry to have frightened you. That was stupid of me."

"I'm jumpy," Bella admitted. "I've been expecting you to say that ever since you and Alice told me about Renata."

"Why didn't you tell me you were worried? I told you I ran her off with a promise to end her if I ever heard or smelled her near you again."

"Exactly. It seemed disloyal to be nervous knowing that." Bella chuckled at an internal thought and then shook her head. "I realize that sounds silly, but two weeks ago I would have thought that fearing an attack from a vampire was silly."

"My gift combined with Alice's provides us with more protection than most immortals. I don't blame you for your fear at all. Just know that Alice and I are both using our formidable talents to ensure your safety."

Though Bella's hands were still clammy, she squeezed his fingers reassuringly and smiled. "You said it's an old friend who's waiting for us. Care to give me further details?"

"Her name is Maggie, and she is originally from Scotland. We don't see her very much because she's what we refer to as a nomad."

"We? You mean in vampire lingo?"

Edward rolled his eyes at her as he nodded his head. "Yes. She doesn't have a set coven to call her own. Though, I doubt Maggie simply dropped in of her own accord. This visit has Alice written all over it."

"Why would Alice bring Maggie here?"

"Maggie is something of an expert on the Volturi. She spent a few centuries living with them, managed to break free their coven and then devoted her life to knowing as much about their ways as she could."

"OK, forgive me, but why? The way you say it makes it seem like she went to great lengths to get away from them. Why would she try to keep tabs on them?"

Edward pointed ahead at the castle looming in the distance. "You'll be able to ask her yourself in a moment. I can guarantee her answer will be more colorful than mine will be."

Alice and Maggie were waiting at the door of the castle. Unsurprisingly, Alice was bouncing with barely restrained excitement at having Bella home and seeing her plan unfold before her. Edward got out of the car and nodded at his sister, ignoring the smirk on her face.

"'Lo, Alice," he murmured. "Maggie, what a pleasant _surprise_, my dear. How strange that my sister didn't mention you were planning a visit."

Maggie's crimson eyes bore into his, undulating as she drew him in.

"Why, Edward . . . I told ye myself."

_Work, dammit. Believe. Hear me._

Edward shook his head and closed his eyes before smiling. "Nope," he said, shaking his head.

"Feck! I thought I ha' ye that time," Maggie said impishly.

Her bouncing, red hair bobbed at her shoulders as she skipped to his side. Her pale face, spotted with shimmering freckles, was jarringly beautiful and struck him every time he saw her. She was tiny, smaller even than Alice, with magnetic eyes and a guileless smile. Edward swept her up in a hug and swung her round once before setting her lightly on the ground. Maggie immediately peered into the car.

"Alright, where i' she? Let's see this human yer taen on wi.*"

Edward flashed around the car to Bella's door, surprised that she hadn't leapt out the minute they were stopped. When he opened the door, he found Bella looking over at Maggie with a look of wide-eyed fear on her face. _Blast_, he thought angrily. He hadn't thought to warn her about Maggie's eye color.

"Bella, love. Come out of the car. I want you to meet Maggie."

"Yes, come oot wi' ye, hen," Maggie crooned into the open window, her smile too wide. "I'm as harmless as a wee fly."

Bella extricated herself from the car and allowed Edward to fold his arms around her from behind. He growled lightly at Maggie, a simple warning, before kissing Bella's cheek gently. Bella looked warily between Edward and Maggie, clearly not believing Maggie's line about being harmless.

"Why don't she buy it, then?" Maggie asked, straightening and arranging her face in a more normal manner.

"She's a shield," Alice interjected, flitting over to stand beside Bella and Edward. "You'll probably have less success with her than you do with either Edward or me."

"Och! My weekend is ruined then," Maggie grumbled. She walked over to Bella and extended her hand. "Pleased to meet ye, Bella Swan from America. Yer future sister talked my immortal ears off before ye two showed up."

Bella only stared at Maggie's hand, the furrow between her brows becoming deeper.

"I don't mean to be rude," Bella said, her voice shaky. "Edward, her eyes are red. Doesn't that mean . . ."

"Yeah," Maggie replied carelessly. "Animals taste like foul oxter*, if ye ask me. But I'm nae thirsty at all, and I already know yer going to be one of us. Seems weird tae me, but tae each his own, I guess."

"I should have warned you," Edward whispered in her ear. "Maggie is a friend, though a traditional vampire. She won't harm you."

He leveled his gaze at the crimson-eyed vampire in front of him as he spoke, and she rolled her eyes at him. _Oh, come off it, Edward. I'm not going to bite your human, even though she smells like a little slice of heaven. I may be a lying besom*, but I'm true to my word. She's safe from my teeth._ Edward nodded quickly, a motion surely imperceptible to Bella. With a deep breath, Bella slowly met Maggie's outstretched hand and shook it.

"Nice to meet you, Maggie." Bella's smile, though shaky and thin, seemed genuine. "Now, may I ask what you were trying to do to Edward when he first arrived?"

The small vampire threw her head back and laughed raucously, her razor-sharp teeth glinting in the sunlight. When Bella cringed away, Maggie covered her mouth, effectively stifling the laugh. Her red eyes danced with merriment at Bella's direct question. _Oh, she and I will get on like gangbusters, Edward._

"I hae a little gift of me own, hen. I can make anyone believe anything I want them to. Well, anyone except ye three. Tis my sincerest wish that one day I'll make Edward believe something that isnae true."

Bella twisted around to look at Edward. "So, her gift doesn't work on you?"

"Not exactly. She's damn convincing, but I can always hear her internal voice as well and _that_ doesn't lie."

Edward winked at Maggie who stuck out her tongue. She held out her arm to Bella who took it slowly.

"Alice tells me yer going to defeat the Volturi," Maggie proclaimed, covering Bella's hand with hers.

Had it been possible, Edward would have choked right then and there. "Does she really?" he asked in a deep growl.

_Simmer down, Edward_, both Alice and Maggie thought at the same time.

"Maggie is exaggerating," Alice continued aloud, "though I don't doubt she _hopes_ Bella defeats the Volturi. I told her that Bella might be able to help us find our family. _That's all_, right, Maggie?"

"That sort o implies defeating them, eh Alice?" Maggie asked in a simpering, high-pitched tone as she and Bella walked toward the door of the castle.

"I thought that, too," Bella whispered, leaning marginally closer to Maggie.

"I heard that, Bella." Edward's pinched voice rumbled behind her, but Bella appeared to pay it no mind. She continued to walk forward with Maggie, already beginning to discuss which documents to look at first. "You will pay for this, sister," he said through clenched teeth.

Alice danced forward and took Bella's other arm. _Surely we've established over the years whose more capable of making the other pay, haven't we, Edward?_

_Bloody fucking psychic_, he thought, wiping his hand across his face as he followed the women into the house. It would be a long day for him, he was sure.

* * *

"Maggie, why did you leave the Volturi?" Bella asked when they were seated in the library. A cup of tea sat untouched in front of her.

"It's a right drag to be used," Maggie replied, flouncing back in her chair dramatically. "Stone puppets are all any o us on Aro's _guard_ ever really were. We came when he told us to come, sat when he told us to sit, and killed when he said we could. Our gifts were his toys and they were for _him_ to use, nae for us. T'was a wretched existence."

Bella sat quietly and seemed to take in Maggie's words. Her deep brown eyes flitted over to Edward and then to Alice; the mixture of shock and pain in her eyes was palpable.

"We've known this for some time, Bella. It's not news to us what the Volturi did or are doing. It's why we're so determined to get our family back." Edward worked hard to keep his voice calm, but he knew that Bella could see right through him.

"If it was that awful, why have you kept yourself involved in their comings and goings?" Bella spoke softly, looking down instead of at Maggie. "If it were me, I would have never looked back."

"You say that . . . but you ne'er saw them take someone. I did. Feck, I wa' _responsible_ for them taking hundreds of immortals. Tis the least I ca' do for my fellow immortals to make up for what I did when I was wi' the Volturi."

Bella nodded, folding her hands neatly in her lap as she considered her next question. "Can you tell me how your gift works?"

"It's pretty simple. I can make people believe anything I want them to. Works easier for humans than it does for other immortals . . . less brain power." Maggie's red eyes widened when Bella's eyebrows rose in surprise. She immediately held up her hands and shook her head. "Nae offence or anything."

"None taken," Bella said with a nod of her head.

"Anyway, all I do is concentrate on what I want them to believe, stare at them real hard, and then _poof_! They think I'm telling the God's honest truth."

"So when you meet up with members of the Volturi, you just make them believe you're one of them again?"

"Sort of. I pick one of the bulkier guys, like Felix or Demetri. Those are two braw* vampires, but there's verra few marbles rolling around in all that immortal space between their ears. Anyway, I pick them and when they sneer at me about being gone for so long, I just tell them sweetly that I ne'er left." Maggie snapped her fingers and smiled. "They're putty in my hands after that. Tell me anything I want to know, they will."

Maggie's youthful enthusiasm was catching. Bella and Alice were smiling right along with her. Edward remembered well the first time Maggie had come to he and Alice after the rest of the family was taken. It had been a week after the meeting in the clearing, and Alice was still in a near catatonic state with worry over Jasper. Maggie arrived on their doorstep, a frantic look on her face.

"_I had to come, Edward," Maggie said, taking his hand. "I saw yer family, and I know what they have planned."_

_He let her into the castle, leading her into the room where Alice sat staring into the fire but not seeing the flames. He knew she was lost in the future, looking for when Jasper would be by her side again._

"_Tell us what you know," he said._

_Maggie looked at Alice with pity before beginning her tale. She told him that their family was alive and had willingly joined the ranks of the Volturi, but that she could tell immediately that there was something wrong with them._

"_There was something missing from their eyes," she said, shaking her head._

_It was what Edward had feared most: that the memory erasure would have interfered with the family's decision to remain on a strictly animal diet. He cursed and asked her if their eyes were red._

"_No, they still have yer beautiful butterscotch eyes . . . it's more than that. It's like all the parts are there, but they don't really remember wha they are."_

Her response had been little comfort to him at the time, but over the years he became more and more thankful that at least that part of his family, Carlisle especially, couldn't be taken from them. It gave him hope that the rest of their memories were lurking somewhere within them, needing only to be released.

Maggie had told them everything she knew about the Cullens. When she'd mentioned Jasper, it was the first time Alice had come out of her psychic haze. She blinked, listened carefully to everything Maggie had to say and then went under again with what looked like a renewed sense of purpose.

Later that night had been the first time Edward slept with Maggie. It was for comfort more than anything else and neither of them was very attached to the other. They hadn't been together in over a decade. Still, he had a past with her, a past that he would need to explain to Bella. He knew that telling Bella would likely undo the camaraderie between the two women, but he owed it to Bella to be honest.

"Tell me everything you know about Leo," Bella said suddenly, leaning forward in anticipation.

"There's nae much to tell." Maggie sighed and looked over at Edward sadly. "Alice and Edward hae offered suggestions on how to get information about Leo's gift out of the guard. They don't know anything. It's like Aro _knows_ people will be poking their heads in, so he keeps everything about Leo's gift under wraps."

"Smart, but terribly inconvenient." Bella frowned and stood up from the table. She walked over to the journals that were laid out from before. "I hope you have something amazing hidden in here, Carlisle. We're going to need all the help we can get.

Edward remained silent through most of Maggie and Bella's exchange, opting to watch the way Bella's face changed as she gleaned new information from Maggie. He looked and catalogued each of her different expressions, tucking them away for comparison . . . later. It was still difficult for him to process that she would be immortal in only a few weeks. The thought both excited and distressed him. What if, as an immortal, her bond to him wasn't the same? A foolish worry, most likely, but still one of many things that worried him about _after_.

Alice leaned over to Bella after more than three hours of discussion and asked her if she'd like the run of the kitchen. Her face beamed, and she nodded happily.

"This is something I'll miss," she said as she stood up. "I do love cooking. Wonder if I'll have cause to do it after the change?"

"Ye willnae like it as much," Maggie said, turning up her nose. "Human food smells vile to us."

"Then I'll endeavor to enjoy it for as long as I can."

Bella brushed a kiss against Edward's forehead and whispered in his ear as she passed him. Her quiet, intimate words made him smile; they made Maggie, who heard them perfectly, smile as well. She held her tongue, however, until Alice and Bella had left the room.

"Ah, ye make a braw laddie in love, Edward. I'm happy for ye and Bella."

"Thank you, Maggie."

The look of regret must have been apparent on his face since Maggie flashed over in front of him.

"Dinnae fash yersel'*, Edward," she crooned quietly. "I willnae tell yer Bella aboot us."

"I didn't think you would," he replied immediately. "I didn't think _I_ would have to introduce her to a past – flame – so soon."

"So, ye told her ye were wi' others then?"

"Naturally."

"Och, I was just asking. Ye've nothing to worry yersel' about then. She'll understand. She likely already suspects."

"Why?" Edward's voice came out harder and more defiant than he had intended, but it irked him to think that Bella might guess at his past with Maggie. Certainly he hadn't shown any favor to her.

"Ye've nae changed in the five hundred years I've known ye." Maggie shook her head and snorted heartily. "I dinna mean ye've been mooning over me. I'm the first female other than Alice she's seen ye wi', right? It's only natural for her tae wonder."

"I guess. Perhaps I should go tell her now?"

"Don't be an eejit. Tell her tonight when ye can slip it tae her proper." Maggie waggled her eyebrows lasciviously.

"Really, Maggie . . . after seven hundred years, you need to grow up."

_Feck ye, Edward_, she thought kindly enough. _Ye know I'm right_.

He made a gruff noise in the back of his throat and frowned, but nodded grudgingly.

"It'll all be fine. Ye'll see."

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Hey there. Remember me? I'm Java. *facepalm* Anyway, I'm sorry for the huge delay in posting. Real life can go suck an egg. Truly. It's totally interfering with my fantasy world. We'll get to see what happens when Edward tells Bella later; I just wanted to give that its own chapter – well, that and him "slipping it to her proper like," aye? ;) I hope you liked Maggie. I really love her in canon, even if I effed with both her gift and her country of origin. I have a thing for a Scots accent. *sigh*_

_Translation help:_

"Let's see this human yer taen on wi" – "Let's see this human you're taken with."

"foul oxter" – An oxter is an armpit. I love this word.

"_lying besom_" – A besom is a difficult woman.

"braw" – Fine, nicely made. Also strong.

"Dinnae fash yersel'" – Don't worry yourself.


	21. Bathtubs and Bedrooms

_I was a heavy heart to carry_

_My beloved was weighed down._

_My arms around his neck_

_My fingers laced to crown._

_I was a heavy heart to carry_

_But he never let me down._

_When he had me in his arms_

_My feet never touched the ground._

_**Heavy in Your Arms**__, Florence + the Machine_ 2009

_**Disclaimer:**__ You guessed it – I don't own _Twilight_. If I did, you would have seen far more smut and far less sparkly baby birthing. *shudders at the spawn*_

_DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs – these women keep me in line. It's harder than you'd think. ;)_

* * *

Bella had taken to Maggie faster than Edward would have expected. Once Bella had become comfortable in the castle again and gotten a good meal, the two had torn through the documents in the library, piecing together a timeline based on Bella's dating techniques and Maggie's expertise. Within minutes of getting to work, Bella was laughing at Maggie's dry humor and vice versa.

It should have put Edward's mind at ease. Instead, it made him pace. Quickly.

To make matters even worse for him, the minute they were finished with their research, sometime after midnight, Bella disappeared saying she needed a shower. Edward was certain she was angry with him. He watched her as she disappeared up the steps.

"Is he always this aff in his heid?" Maggie asked Alice.

"About Bella? This is mild."

"She's angry," he said sharply. "I can tell."

"No, ye can't," Maggie argued. "Yer _projecting_. Ye'd be mad in her shoes an' ye think it's right fer _her_ ta be mad. Don't make it so, though."

"She's right. I don't see you two having a fight." Alice paused, looking blankly for a moment before smirking widely. "Unless that's how you two . . . fight?"

"Och, gross," Maggie said, guessing at Alice's meaning. "I'll be leavin' fer th' night. Alice?"

"Right behind you, Maggie, my dear."

The two vampires flew out the door in a flurry of giggles and silent teasing at Edward's expense. Even their taunts and Alice's assurance didn't ease his worry. Bella wasn't fickle like many women he'd met. She was constant and rational. But this was different. He'd had a relationship with Maggie, however brief and casual it might have been. Edward might have wondered until dawn what Bella's reaction would be had she not appeared at the top of the steps dressed only in a rose-colored towel.

"Are they gone yet?" she whispered.

"Would you be down here dressed like _that_ if they weren't?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

She shrugged, the towel moving suggestively with her. "I figured Alice would have seen this decision, and they'd be gone by now, but I'm not the mind-reader, you know."

Edward stood at the bottom of the stairs, his hands in his pockets as he stared up at her. The candlelight from the hall sconce turned the tips of her hair to coppery red fire. He forgot to breathe, but he didn't care.

"Are you going to stand there wanting me, or are you going to come get me?"

Bella turned in an almost vampire-like movement, dropping her towel to the ground and prancing lightly up the stairs. Desire rumbled in Edward's chest as he drew in a deep breath full of Bella's scent, ripe and full of want.

"As if you could outrun me," he murmured, taking off up the stairs after her.

Her tinkling giggle echoed down the corridor as Edward paced himself. He didn't particularly _want_ to catch her immediately; he wanted her to lead him. He could hear Bella's soft, padded footsteps moving quickly. He listened carefully; though he could see perfectly in the dim light, Bella wouldn't be able to. Should she fall unexpectedly, he was close enough to her that he could catch her.

"You're kind of slow for a vampire," she called over her shoulder. "You aren't going to let me win, are you?"

"Never," Edward hissed, reaching out a finger in the darkness to caress her back.

He saw the gooseflesh erupt up her spine as she shivered and paused for a half-second. Edward froze as well, his hand moving just above her skin. Bella drew a shuddering breath before taking off again down the hallway, and finally, darting into a rarely used room at the end of the passageway.

She'd been busy while he had been talking with Alice and Maggie. The small room was lit with two or three dozen tiny candles. Bella stood next to a claw-footed copper tub, tinged green at the edges from centuries of use. He leaned against the doorway, allowing himself the pleasure of another surprise. He took a moment to hope that Bella would always be able to surprise him in this way.

"How did you find this room?" Edward smiled faintly as he tucked his hands in his pockets again. The urge to stalk into the chamber after her was great, but he sensed she wanted to go slowly despite her nakedness.

Bella shrugged. "I was exploring the castle last week while you were hunting. I knew what I wanted when I saw the tub, so I took every chance I could to set up the candles, bring in the towels . . . get everything just so."

"And what, pray tell, do you want?" His voice was a gentle purr.

Her eyes dilated slightly, and she clasped her elbow with her hand in apparent discomfort. She looked down momentarily, and Edward flashed to her side, tipping her chin up.

"You mustn't be embarrassed. If I could, I'd pick the thought out of your mind. Since I can't, you'll have to tell me. And I assure you, I'll enjoy hearing it from your mouth even more than I would hearing it in your mind."

"I thought we could – wash each other's hair?" She bit her lip and smiled as the blush crept up her neck to her face. "I know how it makes you feel when I play with your hair . . . well, it feels just as good when you touch mine, so I thought . . ."

Bella angled her face, looking up at Edward tentatively. He framed her cheeks in his hands and brought his lips to hers. She moaned quietly as his tongue grazed her upper lip, and she wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Why would you be embarrassed by that?" His mouth moved against hers, the heat of her breath puffing against his lips.

"Not embarrassed, per se," Bella murmured. "I don't know. There's something very . . . unnerving about expressing a fantasy for the first time."

"I find it sexy as hell. Shall I disrobe while you start the bath?"

Edward waggled his eyebrows at her, making her laugh. It erased the last of the embarrassment from her face, and she turned her attention to the facet. She didn't speak again until her back was turned and the water was running into the tub.

"So . . . how long since you and Maggie were an item?" Bella's voice was light, but Edward saw the stiff arch of her back.

He threw the last of his clothes to the ground and ran to her side, stopping just short of pulling her into his arms.

"I – I should have told you sooner."

"It's a simple question, Edward. How long? A few months? A couple years?"

"Over ten years," he replied. "And 'item' is a strong word. How did you – did she tell you?"

"No, of course not. That's not the way women work, Edward. You should know that, having access to so many of our brains. I just knew."

Her back was still turned away from him, denying him even the ability to look into her eyes. At least when he could see her eyes, he had some clue what she was thinking or feeling. Without those clues, he felt lost. Though her voice remained calm and soft, her back seemed too straight—her posture too rigid. He floundered for something to say, some words that would explain away what had happened between he and Maggie.

"Did you think I would be angry? Is that why you didn't come to me as soon as they left?"

Bella turned then, perching on the edge of the tub and looking up at him. For the first time in her presence, he _felt_ his nakedness and wanted to cover himself, but he refrained from crossing his arms in front of his body.

"You have every right to be angry, I guess. If I'd known she would be here, I could have told you in advance about our . . . history. Instead, it looks like I hid it."

"But you didn't hide it; you just didn't have a chance to tell me. And we got along fine. Why would you assume I'd be angry? You'd told me that there'd been others, and they were all immortal. It only figured that I'd eventually run into one or all of them."

"This wasn't how I imagined it," Edward burst out, throwing his hands up in the air. "I expected if we were going to see . . . one of them, I'd have time to tell you and explain. This – it was far too rushed for my liking."

"Explain what? You slept with her, right?" Bella smirked as his eyes widened. "I get the picture, Edward; I don't need it drawn out in living color. You both seem more like old friends than former lovers. When did it happen?"

"The first time was just after my family was taken. She – Maggie – came because she saw them on one of her visits to Volterra. It was . . . spur of the moment. I needed comfort, and she was there."

"Don't ever describe it to her like that," Bella said, shuddering. "It makes you sound like a complete ass, though I assume you're trying to save my feelings."

"I don't understand, Bella. You're not . . . jealous?"

"Wildly. I wish I could have been the one to comfort you, but twenty years ago, I was about nine – I don't think I would have been as skilled as I am today."

Despite his confusion, his member twitched at the veiled tease in her words. Skilled didn't even begin to cover what Bella was for him.

"I just – you need to know that she and I – I didn't love her. Ever."

"You already told me that you've never loved anyone before me." Bella lifted her eyes to his and reached out for his hand. She pulled on it until his palm covered her chest, just above her heart. "Edward, I believe you. Jealous? Yeah, a little bit. But I understand. And I will _never_ doubt you. Not when you look at me like this."

He closed his eyes as she caressed his cheek with her hand, gently following the line of his jaw down his neck until her hand rested over his heart. They stood in silence, drinking in the closeness of each other.

"Would you have been angry with me if the roles had been reversed?"

"Not with you," he hedged, "but I think I'd want to rip the throat out of any man who touched you, past or present."

"Not an idle threat coming from you." Bella smirked as she trailed her fingers up toward his neck. "Are you disappointed that I'm not angry enough to do Maggie harm?"

Edward bit the inside of his cheeks, stifling the chuckle that rose in his throat. However, the sound died as he thought about Bella fighting for him. For the first time, he focused on the thought of her as a predator, stalking toward a woman she perceived as a threat, and pouncing on her. He didn't think about the potential damage she might suffer because the Bella he pictured had skin like granite and razor sharp teeth. The Bella he pictured was immortal.

"No," he whispered, his voice hoarse. "I'm not disappointed."

It was all the words he could manage as pictures of Bella with marble skin and fiery red eyes danced through his mind. Edward moved around the real Bella, turning off the faucet with one hand and capturing Bella's hair with the other. He tugged, angling her chin upward. Greedily, his eyes traveled over the sharp lines of her bone structure. It added to his imaginings.

She seemed confused at first, unsure what to make of his whispering voice and dark eyes, but her body responded to his commanding touch. Her skin pebbled and her nipples peaked as his eyes moved lower over her skin. Edward let his fingers move gently through her hair and down the curve of her back. He encircled her waist and lifted her gently, placing her into the large tub. The water surrounded her and made her breasts buoyant .

"Lean back," he said softly, though his voice had a commanding tone. "All the way."

Bella leaned against his hand, allowing him to guide her all the way into the water. Her face blurred as she went under, but her eyes remained open, never leaving his. The strands of her hair floated out and darkened, and she looked to Edward like a water nymph. Bella pulled herself up and took a deep breath, a smile crossing her lips.

"You looked other-worldly from under water, backlit by the candles," she said.

"I am other-worldly," he replied with a smile.

"True enough." Bella sighed as he applied the shampoo to her hair. "You looked _more_ other-worldly, then."

"You did, too." Her heavy, wet hair felt different to his fingers, sliding through slickly with the help of the soap. Soapy water ran in rivulets over her skin, between her breasts and into the water, creating a film on top that hid the lower part of her body from him. "Move up."

Edward lowered himself into the tub so that she was between his legs and continued to massage the soap into her hair. She leaned back and sighed when their bodies were flush. Bella's skin was hot and pliant from soaking in the warm water; he worried that his cool skin would be shocking against hers.

"Mmm," she murmured moving against him. "I think I'll miss that a bit."

"What's that?"

"The temperature difference. It's become a real turn on for me."

"Really?" He paused in his scalp massage as she leaned her head against his shoulder to look up at him. "I worried that it would be uncomfortable."

"Not at all," Bella said immediately. "It's just you, and—you know—you are inherently a turn on to me."

She winked up at him and then turned around, shaking her head slightly to indicate she was ready for him to continue. Edward chuckled before placing his hands back in her hair. He loved the way she relaxed into him, almost purring in her contentment as he ran his fingers through her hair.

He cupped his hands in the water and began washing the soap out of her locks. The dark curtain of her hair fanned out in the water as he washed it. He couldn't resist pulling gently and tipping her head back so he could kiss her thoroughly. He wrapped his hand around her neck and kissed her until her fingers were clawing at his chest and her breathing was ragged. He pulled away with a smile.

Bella knelt up, facing Edward. The water trailed down her skin, making a tantalizing path to her thighs. Edward licked his lips involuntarily. He'd all but forgotten Bella's promise to return the favor of shampooing his hair; the temptation to bury his face between her thighs was far too great.

"Your turn?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"I think _not_," Edward whispered.

He moved quickly, standing and lifting Bella in one movement. He snatched a towel from the rack and wrapped her in it, growling lowly at the loss of contact with her skin. Being close to her for so long in the water, skin against skin, had left Edward hungry for her. He ran with her down the hallway toward his own room instead of the room they had been sharing since Bella arrived at the castle.

"This is different," Bella murmured as he set her down.

"It's yours as much as it is mine." Edward caressed the curve of her shoulder as she stepped close to her. "Alice insisted you have a room of your own, to make you feel more in control, but it was always my intention to share this with you as well."

"It always surprised me that you had a bed," Bella said with a smirk as she turned around.

"We keep up appearances."

"For whom? You said yourself no one visits, and you like it that way."

"True, but it's easier to have the furnishings than to explain their absence should we have a visitor."

Bella seemed to consider the explanation for a few moments before turning fully around and dropping the towel. She stepped over it and ran her fingers lightly over his chest. His marble skin ignited with the feather-soft graze of her touch. "Was there something you wanted, Edward?"

He took a step bringing his body flush with hers, and ran his finger down her body following the same path he'd watched the droplets of water make minutes earlier. Her thighs trembled as his middle finger drew nearer to her opening. Edward wrapped his hand around her waist, steadying her, and then slipped one long finger inside.

Bella's body became limp as she leaned against him for support, parting her legs slightly to allow him to move within her. Her breath came in ragged gasps against his chest as her fingernails dug for purchase against his skin. Edward moved his hand, cupping her so that the heel of his hand moved against her sensitive bundle of nerves while his finger continued to move within her.

Her legs shook, and he felt her raise up on her toes, thrusting her hips with the motion of his fingers. Torn between wanting to feel her lose control that very moment and needing to be inside her, he pulled away from her, lifting her up and carrying her to the bed. He set her down roughly, eager to press himself against her. She bounced lightly on the bed in front of him. Bella bit her lips and lay back, looking up at him expectantly.

Edward's restraint, practiced and so vital to Bella's safety, grew thinner and harder to manage with every encounter they shared. When she submitted to him like this, allowing him to be rougher, more animalistic, it made the need to let loose his primal instincts even harder to resist. Bella fisted her hair in one hand while running her other hand over her chest and down toward her stomach.

"Mine," Edward growled lowly, causing Bella's eyes to dilate further.

Edward ran his nose from her knee down her thigh until he brushed against her warm center. Her hips bucked, pressing her wetness against his face as he darted his tongue out. She moaned, circling her hips as he played softly with her folds, teasing her with only the gentlest touch of his tongue. When she was chanting _more_ in rhythm with her circling hips, he plunged his tongue and fingers into her suddenly.

She stiffened as he sucked, moving his mouth back and forth over where she liked it most until she was crying out his name. Instead of letting her ride out the waves of pleasure, he pulled away and knelt over her, watching. Bella's eyes flew open at the loss of his touch, surprised that he stopped so suddenly. The muscles in her stomach clenched as the climax moved through her, but he could see the frustration on her face. Edward smiled and crooked his finger at her.

He expected her to get up weakly, overcome with the recent orgasm. Instead, she scrambled to kneeling in front of him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She covered his mouth with her, sucking at his lips greedily and pressing her body against his.

"I want more. Now." Bella's voice was hoarse from moaning.

"Then take what you want," Edward replied, turning them around and sitting up against the head board.

Bella straddled his hips and lowered herself onto him. He hissed as the warmth surrounded him. She didn't wait for them to become accustomed to each other; as soon as he was fully inside of her, she lifted her body quickly, drawing herself off of his shaft. Edward grabbed at her hips, but she shook her head and grunted a small warning. She would be setting the pace that evening and her plans seemed to include hard and fast.

Bella's eyes were closed in concentration as she moved over him, twisting her hips as they rose and fell. Edward held onto her sides, caught up in the beauty of her focus. The muscles in her thighs worked hard as she moved, pushing both herself and Edward closer to the edge. She was primal, and completely in control of him. His head fell back, and he closed his eyes, envisioning her again as the icy, pale immortal Bella.

As she approached her climax, her breath came in small grunts of exertion. Sweat stood out on her rosy skin and her nails gripped his shoulders fiercely. Bella's upper lip was curled in a nearly feral smile of satisfaction as she whipped her head back and cried out. Her walls squeezed around him, her body moving around him and willing him to fall with her.

While she was lost in her own release, Edward held her tightly and flipped her over on the bed. He moved over top of her and never lost the rhythm she had set. Bella's eyes flew open as his hand guided her ass, adding to the force of his thrust.

"Yes," she hissed as he moved roughly within her. "Make me y. . ."

"What's that, love?" he murmured, his lips ghosting over her neck as he spoke. "Make you what?"

"Yours. Make me yours."

His breath heaved as the tension coiled within him. Visions from throughout the day filled his head as he neared his climax: Bella as a jealous, immortal fighting for him; as a flawless water nymph floating in the water; as a primal lover taking and giving in equal parts. The vision that stood out the clearest was that of Bella with cold, hard, _unbreakable_ skin. He thought of marking her, truly making her his, and the thought spurred him forward. With his teeth inches from her pounding jugular, Edward fell over the edge and roared out his orgasm. His mouth closed over her neck and his teeth sliced easily through the delicate flesh covering her veins.

The instant the hot, lilac flavored blood coursed over his tongue, he drew away in horror at what he had done. Bella's eyes were wide in shock, her lips rounded in an O of surprise. Edward looked frantically between her shocked face and the bite mark. Her face was becoming pale as the blood began to seep freely from the wound on her neck.

"Oh, God. Bella?"

Her lips closed and opened twice before her back arched, and she screamed. The venom had mixed into her blood stream. Possibilities flew through Edward's mind. He knew he'd barely bitten her. There was precious little venom in her system and that meant that the transformation would be torturously long and unnecessarily painful. He had a choice: he could let her go or he could bite her more, pushing more of his venom into her system and possibly saving her from some of the burning. Edward had only seconds to decide.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered, turning her head and exposing the other side of her neck.

In contradiction to the gentle tone of his voice, he bit her neck savagely, ensuring that his teeth would push the venom fully into her system. Already he noted a subtle change in the texture of her skin. It was minutely tougher; the venom was already beginning to work.

He continued biting at pulse points, whispering his apology to her as she moaned and whined. Had it been possible, Edward's face would have been wet with tears. When he'd finished, Bella lay quiet and still on the bed, her eyes still open and looking around the room.

"Bella, please. I didn't . . ."

"Shh." The sound was barely audible from her lip, but she was looking right into Edward's eyes.

His brow creased in surprise. He remembered the end of his transformation with vivid, immortal clarity, but he didn't remember those first moments any more than he remembered the last moments of his mortal life. Had he been able to speak coherently? He didn't remember, but he doubted it highly. Now, his mind took off frantically. Had he made a mistake? Had he taken too much blood? Was she dying?

Bella closed her eyes, and her lips trembled. Edward leaned forward, turning his head in the hopes that he might hear her whisper to him. Her lips never moved, though her voice was clear in his head. _Stay with me. I love you_. She'd spoken to him in the only way she could, lowering her shield somehow and speaking directly into his mind.

Edward grasped her hand and waited for her to scream, to writhe, to show that the transformation had begun. She lay silently, her eyes shut and her mind closed to him once again. Though he tried to break through, he could hear nothing. He knew he would hear thoughts of her pain, but he didn't care. He wanted reassurance that she would survive this. He was denied even that. Her beating heart and rapid breath were the only solace to Edward as he watched her silently burn.

* * *

_**A/N:** Surprise, surprise. Well, for you. ;) I had always wanted the bite to be sort of an accident. Of course Edward can't forget that Bella isn't immortal, but his thoughts about her immortality weighed heavily in the accident. In the end, it was a loss of control and a pure mistake that made him bite her without warning. We shall have to see what this does to Bella's ability to help with the documents. Do you think this Bella will be as controlled as in canon, or will there be some differences? We'll just have to see what happens in the coming chapters. ;)_

_If you are interested, I posted the two outtakes I have written thus far for this story to my FF profile under a new story title: **The Foreign Papers Outtakes and Extras**. They are both alternate POVs, but I think they really give you a good insight into the characters. :) I hope you enjoy. Thanks so much for reading! ~Jen_


	22. Becoming Immortal

_If I should die this very moment_

_I wouldn't fear_

_For I've never known completeness_

_Like being here_

_Wrapped in the warmth of you_

_Loving every breath of you_

_Still my heart this moment_

_Or it might burst_

_**Gorecki**__, Lamb 1997_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own these vamps; that's SM. I just play with them and get them to do far more explicit things than she did. ;)_

_Many thanks to the women behind the curtain: DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. I love them muchly. Also, I would recommend listening to the whole of that song up there. It played a big part in bringing my vision of Bella's change together and I think it might help you envision it._

* * *

Bella registered a pinch at her neck, but the momentary pain was lost in a wash of pleasure. Edward was inside her, loving her. His chest was rumbling with pleasure, and his tongue moved like magic over her neck.

The burning began as a pinprick of feeling just below Edward's tongue. Bella's first reaction was to brush away what must have been some sort of stinging insect; the feeling was little more than a nuisance at first. It quickly became far greater than that.

As Edward pulled away, the burning intensified and spread along the column of her neck to just under her ear. Even if she hadn't seen the look of horror on Edward's face, the feel of warm blood trickling down her skin would have told Bella everything she needed to know.

Edward had bitten her.

Something blistering was moving swiftly under her skin. It had wrapped her neck in a flaming embrace and was sending tendrils of white-hot pain over her chest. She kept her eyes open, but concentrated only on the pain. She mustn't scream. _Fuck, it hurts_. She must not scream. _Don't do it, Isabella_.

But she did.

Her voice sounded wrong above the dull roar of her boiling blood and racing heart. Though she wanted to claw at her neck, she didn't seem to have enough energy to move. The hungry fire drew all of her strength, leaving her all but bound beneath its fury.

"I'm so sorry."

Edward's silken voice floated to her ears like the sweetest splash of water on a scorching hot day, but the relief didn't last long. His teeth sliced into the other side of her neck, making her whimper silently. Though her body was in a frenzied panic, her mind calmly noted the difference between Edward's first bite and his second. He was savage, tearing at her skin the second time and using his tongue to push more of the smoldering fluid into her blood stream.

She moaned as he moved to her wrists and thighs, biting at pulse points and pushing the venom into her system. _Enough, Edward!_ she thought angrily. Finally he stopped at no less than eight bites. The fire raced over the surface of her entire body, leaving not a square inch untouched.

"Bella, please. I didn't . . ."

"Shh."

Bella was as surprised as Edward that she'd made such a quiet sound. It was taking every ounce of control she possessed to keep from screaming. She wasn't seeing much of the room around her anymore; the pain had given her a kind of tunnel vision where all she could see was Edward's perfect face contorted in fear. _Oh, no. This won't do._ She needed to reassure him, but how? If she tried to open her lips to speak, she knew a scream would emerge.

When Bella felt the tiny nudge on her brain—her tortured, burning brain—she knew what she must do. The next time he pushed, she let him nudge her shield aside. She didn't know _how_ she did it, but it worked. The moment Edward was in her brain, she knew it.

_Stay with me. I love you._

The walls snapped back into place as soon as she was sure he'd heard her message. Her rational mind thought it odd that it was easier to hold the shield in place than to let it down, but she guessed self-preservation was perhaps the strongest reflex people possessed, either dead or undead.

Time warped as the venom worked its way through her body. She knew that Edward was with her, even though his cool touch barely registered against the raging heat of transformation. Bella imagined the venom like liquid fire, seeking and destroying as it raced through her veins.

Her mind remained somewhat detached from the fiery torment, despite registering it and cataloguing it throughout the process. The transformation pushed Bella's body beyond the limits of its comprehension of pain. She didn't have words to qualify what she was experiencing. Instead, as her mind acknowledged the agony, it looked past it, and made note of the things going on around her.

Something heavy and constraining fell over her body, adding weight and heat to her already parched body. The fuzzy texture that irritated her burning skin told her it was a blanket. She wondered why Edward covered her. Did she look as charred as she was beginning to feel?

"It's going to be fine. Look."

_Alice_. Bella's worried mind settled when she heard her sister's high, tinkling voice. Alice had been Bella's family from the moment Edward had brought her home, and her mind didn't have time for mundane classifications in this state—Alice was her sister.

She wished that she could see what Alice was showing Edward. She'd like a time frame for one, and some reassurance that she wouldn't emerge a charred, unrecognizable crisp would be nice as well.

"So she'll live?" Edward's voice was tense, on edge.

Bella wanted to soothe him, and she felt the molten muscles of her arm twitch with the effort to move her index finger. She didn't know if her effort produced any motion, but the exertion would have left her panting had she been able to open her mouth. She relaxed her arm, settling back into the consistency of the pain, and listened.

"Yes, she'll live," Alice murmured softly, stroking Bella's hair. "And she'll be stunning. You'll be fine, _mi Bella._"

The desire to smile for Alice, to reassure her that she'd heard and was thankful for her uttering those words aloud, was great. But Bella knew that should she attempt a smile, a scream wouldn't be far behind. She fought to keep silent for Edward, knowing that every sound of pain she made would cut like a knife through him. He would have enough guilt weighing on him until she woke up as it was; if she could, she'd save him from any more.

"How long?" Edward asked.

Bella could feel something brushing her shoulder. She knew it had to be Edward's fingers, but she couldn't feel the familiar coolness of his touch. Instead, it was just as if someone was stirring the lava that seemed to flowing over her body. It wasn't unpleasant, it just wasn't as calming as she would have hoped it would be. Apparently, her transformation was her own to endure; even Edward couldn't soothe her.

"I tried to get as much venom into her as I could," Edward commented.

_Wait_, Bella thought wildly. Had Alice answered and she missed it?

"So you think that long?" Edward, again.

_Dammit!_ Alice was speaking into Edward's mind. But why? Didn't Bella deserve to hear how long she would need to endure?

Her fury at being kept out of the loop was cut short by a familiar, yet different sound. Edward was growling, but it wasn't in pleasure. He was angry.

"I'm not leaving her, Alice," he snarled.

_Leaving?_ _No,_ her mind moaned. She might not draw comfort from his touch, but she couldn't bear the thought of being separated from him. She needed him, his voice if nothing else.

As suddenly as the growling began, it ceased. The siblings must have reached an internal agreement, and Bella was relieved to hear Edward's voice again.

"I think she'd like that," he said. "But Maggie should . . ."

"Och, I'm oot th' door."

The door thudded in her hot, pained ears, echoing around in her mind and amplifying the ache. Bella lost concentration for a moment and heard her own whimper of pain before she realized she'd loosened her control. Immediately, she refocused her attention and clamped her lips shut.

"Bella?"

Edward's voice was close to her, and she could feel the waves of his breath over her skin. It was hot and dry, so unlike what she was used to from him. But even sunk within the pain and fire, she could smell his scent like a beacon, and it renewed her courage.

"She's keeping herself quiet," Alice said, her tone shocked.

"Why?" Edward whispered. "Bella, listen to me. You mustn't make this harder on yourself. We all screamed through this. Let it out, love. I'll be strong for you."

Bella could hear the pain in his voice as he gave her permission to wail. She wanted to let it out, even knowing that it would do her no good at all. Still, she held her silence. She could be strong too, as strong as she needed to be in order to save Edward from pain.

"The screaming didn't help, brother," Alice said.

Bella felt the bed move and guessed that Alice had moved to the other side of her. She wondered if that was the reason for the argument earlier; did Alice want to stay with her as well?

"It didn't bloody well hurt, either," Edward snarled. "She's fighting it, but I don't understand why."

"For you, you big ninny," Alice murmured. "It's her way of letting you know she's all right. Now move, and let me dress her."

_Oh_, Bella thought. It figured that Alice would think of everything.

* * *

_Tappity, tap, tap, tap. Pause. Tappity, tap, tap, tap. Pause._

Bella thought she might go insane thinking about what could be making that noise. Her mind wandered in frustratingly wide circles during the transformation. She found it hard to focus on the many strange sounds that met her ears. This latest, irritatingly regular sound had been puzzling her for the last seven hundred and ninety.

Yes. She was counting.

Her heart beat in counterpoint to the tapping noise which set Bella's mind off on a tangent about music. She reigned herself in after several seconds of pondering the syncopated rhythm and focused on what might be making the sound.

_Four . . . no, five distinct taps._

_Fingers._

_Non-distinct. Softened by some barrier. Not in this room._

Bella's tortured body shuddered involuntarily as she grasped the concept that her hearing was the first part of her to become immortal. Someone was tapping their fingers impatiently in an adjacent room. She heard the distinct click of fingernails on soft wood, muted slightly by the stone walls. It must have been Maggie.

_What will be next?_

* * *

"Checkmate," Edward's voice said quietly.

"Ye dinna have to whisper," Maggie replied in a normal speaking voice. "She isn't gae te mind tha noise."

Edward growled lowly, but Bella wanted to laugh. Maggie couldn't have been more correct. In fact, it was Edward's voice she looked forward to most of all.

"Och, stoppit," Maggie said wearily. "We've all o' us done tha'. I know she's yers, but hers is no special, ye ken? It's just a wee bit longer an' then she'll be like us."

"Not soon enough," Edward commented gruffly.

Bella could not agree more.

The fire continued to eat away at her body while her heart fought the venom encroaching on it. She could feel the thudding heaviness of the large muscle in her chest, and she imagined it heaving beneath her breast like a shuddering mass. She wondered what it looked like, and then stopped. Bella already thought she looked like a bit of charcoal; she didn't want to think about what her overworked heart might look like as it raced toward the finish line.

* * *

_Night?_

_Day?_

_Did it even matter?_

Her mind reeled at the thought that she would never sleep again. By rights, she should have fallen into a stress-induced comatose state due to the intense pain. Clinically, she knew that. In fact, to an outside observer, she thought it might look as though she was in coma. But she'd never been so intensely aware of the sounds, smells, and even _tastes_ that were floating in the air around her.

She could _taste_ Edward's scent as he lay next to her. He inhaled and exhaled regularly, keeping pace with Bella's own breathing rate. As he did, his mint and honey flavored breath washed over her face. Now, she could pick up all of the minute notes of flavor in his scent.

He was saffron and mint, cinnamon and honey, with a cardamom aftertaste that mingled with jasmine. Edward's scent in her nose and on her tongue reminded her that in time she'd taste him again, when she could focus only on loving him, tasting him, devouring him.

_Would it be days?_

_Hours?_

_Minutes?_

_Did it even matter as long as it came?_

* * *

"Bella will want to get back to work as soon as she wakes up," Alice said confidently.

Alice should be confident; she didn't even need to be a psychic to see _that._

"Oh, and when will that be?"

Silence.

_Fucking really?_

"Excellent," Edward said, a smile apparent in his voice.

_What did _that_ mean? Hours? Minutes? _Bella wanted to pull her hair out. The scorching fire hadn't let up in its ferocity since the moment it'd taken hold of her body. She'd lost track of time save for the beats of her erratic heart. There was no time anymore. _Convenient, seeing as I'll be living forever. Hopefully not constantly on fire though . . ._

Bella's mind was beginning to worry her, the way it was able to go off on three different tangents and follow all of them appropriately.

"Alice, you know she won't be able to get right back to work," Edward said in a hushed whisper.

When she was fully human, she probably wouldn't have heard him. Now, his voice was brushed satin, gentle and stirring the air around her. It was clear as a bell.

"That's not exactly what I'm seeing, Edward," Alice murmured, her voice hesitant.

Bella's mind strained outward, wanting to see what Edward was seeing, wanting to see inside of Alice's mind. But no, that wouldn't be her gift.

Her gift seemed to be getting more defined by the moment. She could feel it now, like an invisible net around her mind. When Edward pushed on it, as he often did while she burned, it was like a small flare of light went off near the point of attack. Her mind had its very own silent alarm system, and she was beginning to see how it might work.

"How long until they come for us?"

Edward's voice was terse again. He was pacing at the foot of the bed. Alice was lying on the bed next to Bella, running her fingers through Bella's hair. Maggie was tapping her fingers—again—this time inside the bedroom.

"Three months," Alice replied immediately. "That hasn't changed."

"So they haven't heard anything about her change?"

"How would they?" Maggie asked. "None o' us hae been oot o' the hoose."

"We've been slightly preoccupied, Maggie," Edward replied shortly.

"I haven't," she shot back. "Ye think I've been running fer fun?" She snorted loudly. "Ye _do_ hae it bad, Edward. I've been watching fer ye. Not a single immortal aboot."

"Thank you, Maggie," Alice said after a long pause.

Bella could almost see Edward glaring at Maggie for her impertinent tone. Maggie was fiercely loyal to Alice and Edward. It was good to know they had one friend who was completely on their side. Bella thought, perhaps, they would need that loyalty soon.

"Who do you think they'll send?" Edward asked.

"Jane," Maggie said immediately.

Bella heard Edward's footfall pause and then pick up pace.

"Demetri, Felix, Alec, maybe Chelsea?" Maggie continued. "Not Leo, that's fer damn sure."

"Why not Leo?" Alice and Edward asked together.

"Ye saw him," she said. "He's not a fighter. He's a _weapon_, but he's specialized. Aro wouldn't risk him."

"Aro protects him like the crown jewel," Edward commented harshly.

"He's no fool," Alice said, her voice just as angry. "Would that he would make just one mistake, though."

"It'd take a fair lot more'n _one_ to do the damage ye suggest, Alice," Maggie said.

The words hung like weights in the room. Bella wanted to wake up then and begin her immortal life, if only to lift some of the burden from Edward and Alice. They'd suffered this too long alone; it was time to add to their number.

* * *

Edward was sitting silently at her side; Alice and Maggie had left him alone after their discussion. Bella listened to her heart.

_Thud glug. Thud glug. Thud. Glug._

Bella knew it was getting close. Her heart was slowing down with the tremendous effort of pushing her venom-heavy blood through her veins.

She wondered what her veins might look like now, immortal and reinforced. Would they shine silvery through her marble skin the way Edward's had when they lay in the meadow?

She stifled a sigh that would have turned into a scream. Something was troubling her.

Bella's expansive mind turned over the thought of Leo. She let the image she'd created for him wander around the cavernous recesses of her scorched, immortal brain. She imagined him as an elfin creature because Edward said he had been small.

_So small that he needed to be constantly protected?_

Bella found that hard to believe. Alice was small, yet Edward had once told her that his sister was a vicious fighter.

_Why, then, would Aro hold him, and all mention of his gift, so close to himself?_

Bella knew there must be an answer there, but just as her mind began to pick over it, something changed.

Her fingertips weren't burning.

* * *

The burning that had raced through her with such ferocity ebbed from her body in a painfully slow wave, starting at her extremities and working inward toward her heart.

It was still beating in a sickeningly slow rhythm.

_Glug._

_Thud._

_Glug._

It annoyed her, and she wished it would stop.

Perhaps that should have frightened her, but she knew what came next. The moment her heart stopped, her next life would begin.

As the fire left her fingers, she stretched them experimentally. Edward must have had his eyes closed because there was no movement or reaction from where he sat.

There was no pain when she moved her fingers.

_Good._

She lay still as the molten torture slowly receded, leaving her limbs feeling empty and light.

_I thought I would be heavy_.

Made of stone—she thought that would translate into extra weight. Instead, her body felt free. Unencumbered.

Bella also felt her muscles wound tight like the string of an archery bow. She imagined that the first time she moved she might hear a faint twang.

Her thighs and shoulders were cooling, but her heart was picking up pace.

_Oh, no_, she thought. _It's going to fight this_.

She curled her fingers on the bed, gripping the soft cotton of the sheet within her fingers. She heard the fabric rend apart easily and then felt a rush of air as Edward arrived at her side.

"Bella?"

His voice fell to her ears like the soft sound of rain on a tin roof, blissful and sweet like a cool breeze. It sounded so _different_, and yet so much the same. Happiness flooded her. She had worried that everything would be different when she awoke. She was pleased to find that although this had changed, it was still very much recognizable.

She couldn't answer him, though she could feel his fingers entwine with hers. They were . . . _warm_.

Bella's heart continued to speed, now galloping even faster than it had at the beginning of the transformation. Still, it raced, pounded hard against the granite walls of her chest. She imagined it catching fire and burning out, leaving only a pile of ashes on the bed for Edward to weep over.

_No. Alice said she would be fine._

Her heart begged to differ.

_glug-thud-glug-thud-glug-thud-glug-thud-glug-thud-glug-thud_

Bella shifted in fear and heard another ripping sound. Then the sound of the door opening. Two sets of feet. Soft. Reverent.

Alice wouldn't come unless . . .

"Almost, love," Edward murmured, his velvet lips brushing against her ears.

Bella heard the sound of his skin against hers.

"You're almost done."

_dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun_

Silence.

Bella waited.

The fire had cooled. Her skin felt cool and whole. Her mind was clear for the first time since the venom began.

She waited.

Her heart beat no more.

"Edward?"

The voice came from her throat. She felt it reverberate through the only section of her body still on fire. But the sound was something other-worldly, like the voice some fairytale creature.

And then she opened her eyes.

* * *

_**A/N:** There you have it: my version of Bella's change. I actually have to give SM major props here. This was hard because although a lot of Bella's senses are cut off, she has new ones developing all the time. It was just an interesting balance to strike as a writer, picking and choosing which scenes to depict. I hope you enjoy my take on things and I hope to hear your thoughts. Thanks again for taking this journey with me. I can't really express enough how much it means to me when I hear from you, even if I'm not always able to reply as often as I'd like. *hugs and kisses* ~Jen_


	23. One Wicked Little Vampire

_Step back, gonna come at you fast_

_I'm drivin' out of control, I'm getting' ready to crash_

_Won't stop shakin' up what I can_

_I serve it up in a shot, so suck it down like a man_

_So baby, yes I know what I am_

_And no, I don't give a damn and you'll be lovin' it._

_**Keeps Gettin' Better**__, Christina Aguilera 2009_

_**Disclaimer**__: I do not own Edward or Bella; I don't even own Maggie, though I love her so. That's SM. I do, however, own a dog that looks like Bella's Jake from this story. He's fantabulous. :D_

_Many thanks to my betas, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. They are awesome._

* * *

"Edward?"

Bella's voice was a soft, perfected version of her human tone. It reached Edward's ears as he gently removed her fingers from their grip on the ragged sheets. He looked up quickly and watched as her eyes fluttered open for the first time in nearly four days.

Edward restrained the gasp that rose in his throat at the sight of Bella's burgundy-colored eyes. The irises were deep like fine wine, so dark in fact that they blended seamlessly into the black pupils. Instead of showing his surprise, he stared at her, unblinking, and memorized the lines of her face. Some might say she'd been perfected by the venom, but to Edward she was perfect before. Bella was still Bella, only immortal and unbreakable.

"Edward?" she asked again. "What's wrong?"

Bella lifted her torso up off the bed, and Edward moved quickly, without thinking, up to her side to help her. In a flash of movement, she was up and across the room, her body crouched and her hands out in front of her, a low growling noise rumbling through her chest. Her red eyes looked panicked at her own reaction and Edward felt remorse—again—for her distress. He held his hands up in surrender and stayed on the bed, waiting.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, as much to himself as to her. "That was stupid of me. Can you tell me what you're seeing?"

"Stupid of you?" Bella asked, her voice rising in a passion. "I just leapt off the bed like a cornered cat! What's wrong with me?"

"Yer a newborn," Maggie said, shaking her head. "Just the way o' it, love."

Bella's head swung around to face the new voice, and Edward immediately wondered how much she remembered from before the change. Clearly she remembered him, since his name was her first word, but did she also remember Maggie? Alice?

"I heard you tapping your fingers," Bella whispered as she regarded the small, red-haired vampire. "You're Maggie."

"Tha's right, my bonnie lass! Yer doing fine, Bella."

Bella smiled hesitantly as her eyes darted quickly around the room. She still hadn't answered Edward's question, and he found himself becoming impatient with her attention to the others.

_You have forever, Edward_, Alice reprimanded him sternly. _She needs all of us right now._

"Thank you, Alice," he nearly growled.

Bella crouched lower in response to his menacing tone, and Edward stiffened. He saw the way her muscles coiled, tensing for an attack, and prepared himself to deflect any aggression. Surprisingly, he saw a look of recognition flash over her face and then she mastered her instincts, relaxing her posture slightly.

"I don't understand myself," Bella whispered. "I know all of you, I know you are friends—family, even—and yet my body reacts as though I'm under attack. I can't seem to control it."

"But you are!" Alice exclaimed, rushing over to her side.

Edward prepared himself to leap off the bed and intervene because surely Bella would attack Alice for such a forward and swift movement.

_Wait. Watch_. Alice's voice in his head was equal parts commanding and amazed.

Bella's porcelain jaw clenched and a low rumble sounded in her throat as Alice approached, but her fists curled into tiny balls at her side, and she quieted the urge to lunge at her sister. Searching his sister's mind, he saw Bella's choices along with Alice. They were surprisingly rational for a newborn, surprisingly . . . controlled.

"You are doing so well," Alice said softly as she reached out for Bella's hand. "If you only knew how well you are really doing. Tell her, Edward."

"Truly, love," Edward said, "you are exceeding all of our expectations. I fully expected you to attack one of us within the first minute."

Bella looked back at him quizzically; he could see all the questions and nervousness in her blood-red eyes. Still, they softened when she looked back at his face. She smiled again, stronger this time, and she began walking over to where Edward waited on the bed. He held himself back, resisting the urge to close the distance between them, and let her come to him.

"I love you," she murmured when she stood in front of him. "I was so afraid it would be different after—that _I_ would feel different." She reached up and touched his face, her smooth fingers gliding over the skin of his cheek. "Perhaps it does feel different, but it is only because it's _more_. And I'm so thankful, Edward."

He couldn't resist the urge to hold her any longer. As he moved off of the bed to stand in front of her, she looked up at him and seemed to memorize his every movement. Edward took her hand first, gently enfolding it within his own and pulling it down to his chest. Bella didn't show any signs of panic and so he slowly wrapped his other arm around her waist. When his hand was flush with the small of her back, Bella flashed into motion, throwing herself into his arms and pulling him into her embrace with all of her considerable strength.

"I missed your arms so much," she whispered into his ear.

"I've missed yours as well," he replied, his voice only slightly choked. "Ease up a bit, love. You're a fair bit stronger than you think you are."

Bella released him immediately, putting her hands behind her back and looking up at him apologetically.

"I – hurt you?"

"_Hurt_ is putting it strongly," Edward said with a smile.

Both Maggie and Alice snickered into their hands and Bella's eyes darted around the room.

"I did," she whispered. "I actually hurt you a bit. I'm sorry, but wow."

"Wow? _Wow_? Is that all you can say?" Edward's lips quirked up into a half smile as she brought her attention back to him. She opened her mouth to explain, but he covered her lips with one finger. "I understand. I'm only teasing."

"It's just a bit overwhelming. I just hurt a vampire."

"You _are_ a vampire," Edward replied smoothly, taking her hand and leading her around the bed. "Are you ready for this?"

The mirror was in full view, but she couldn't see herself yet. Truthfully, he didn't think she looked very different from her human self. She'd always been pale, though her skin tone had evened out into a snowy white creaminess with no lines, scars, or blemishes. Her hair was fuller, highlighted with a deeper shade of red than it had been previously. The biggest change, and the one that would be most disturbing for Bella, was her eyes. Edward had told her in passing that a newborn vampire's eyes were red, but he couldn't be sure that she remembered or how she would react to seeing herself in such a way. He remembered all too well the visceral reaction she'd had to Maggie's eye color.

"I'm ready," she said, squeezing his hand gently and stepping in front of him toward the mirror.

Edward stood behind her and looked with her as she saw herself. Alice had dressed her simply, in a fashion Bella herself would have chosen: soft jeans, a khaki-colored cable knit sweater, and an emerald green scarf to hold her long hair back loosely. Bella started with her bare feet, flexing her long toes rapidly and watching as they blurred in the mirror. Her laugh was soft, tinkling like the tiniest bell. She twirled on her toes, graceful as a dancer, and watched as her hair swung out around her face.

When she stopped, her lips parted as she took in her features. Edward laid a hand on her shoulder as her eyes widened. She brought a hand up to her cheek and ran a finger under her eye. She'd ceased breathing as she looked over herself, but Edward wouldn't call attention to that. He reached up and ran his fingers through her hair.

"You're stunning, but you've always been," he murmured, bringing his lips to her ear and kissing her temple softly. "Are you ok?"

"I think so," she replied, leaning into his kiss. "They're something else though, aren't they?"

"They'll fade, as long as you keep to our diet."

Bella's hand went immediately to her throat, and she swallowed hard.

"It's the only thing that still hurts," she said apologetically.

"Come," Edward said with a smile. "Let's hunt."

Bella's mouth opened in shock but then she smiled in a way that heated Edward's insides. It was a wicked smile, full of promise. Or, perhaps, it was only what he wanted to see in her smile. He'd missed her touch greatly while she was changing, and he wanted her, badly, in her newly unbreakable form.

"Will you need help?" Alice asked, stepping forward.

Edward leveled his sister with an irritated glare. Regardless of whether Bella might want Alice there, _he_ did not want company. He wanted to enjoy her hunting, enjoy watching her as she became accustomed to her new instincts.

"Right," Alice said, stepping back. "I'll just . . . stay here. But stay close. It'll be . . . better if you stay close."

Edward could see in his sister's mind that there were hunters in the woods, though not within several kilometers of the castle. They would be safe from their enticing smell as long as they remained within five kilometers of their home.

"Safe?" Bella asked, her hands clasped in front of her. "Does she mean that there might be people out there?"

Edward nodded, but Alice stepped forward.

"This is something you must face, Bella," she said sternly. "I know you're frightened that you'll make a mistake. But you must learn to hunt and to do so puts you in danger of killing a human. It's a risk we _all_ take, every time we hunt, no matter how long we've been abstaining. Just know that no matter what happens, we will love you and we _will_ understand."

"You make it sound as though it's a foregone conclusion," Bella muttered, hanging her head.

"On the contrary," Alice said brightly. "I think you are far more controlled than either my brother or I could have imagined you'd be. But you need to know that there is nothing more powerful than the siren call of human blood. It's in our nature to crave it and should its call be too great for you, we wouldn't hold it against you."

Edward stepped up behind Bella, a low growl of warning to his sister building within him as he wrapped his arms around Bella's waist. There was no need to make Bella even more wary of her own instincts; he didn't understand why Alice would imply that she _doubted_ Bella's strength. Instead of dropping her head lower however, Bella stood up straighter.

"I'll just have to be stronger than that call then," she whispered, looking Alice straight in the eye.

Bella walked, head held high, out of the room and Edward scrambled to follow. Alice smirked at him as he passed her. _She's utterly _amazing_,_ Alice thought. _I think we're going to be continually surprised by that one._ Edward didn't fully understand what Alice was thinking about since her thoughts about Bella were a snarl of confusing images, but he felt certain that his sister was right: Bella was going to be a constant source of surprise.

* * *

"Where do we go?" Bella asked as they stepped outside.

Her head appeared to be on a swivel as they stepped outside, moving from side to side as she took in her surroundings and likely saw everything anew. Edward remembered his first glimpse of the world with immortal eyes, remembered the dueling feelings of panic and awe. He wanted a glimpse inside of her mind to see it with her and see what her expansive, immortal mind made of it.

"I'm following you," Edward said, holding his hands out in front of him. "This is your show."

"What do you mean?" Bella asked, her voice edging on panic again. "I don't know what to do."

"Yes, you do. It's all inside of you. Didn't you feel your body react to protect you from us in the bedroom, even though you knew us? Those are your instincts, Bella, and you need to learn to listen to them in order to hunt."

Bella swallowed hard and looked around. Edward wondered if she was even aware of the way she was sniffing the air: head aloft and neck stretched out as she smelled the world around her, cataloging every bit of sensory data that hit her nose. He stepped around her and stood behind her, placing his hands around the base of her neck.

"That's different than I expected, you know," Bella murmured, rubbing her chin against the top of his hand. "I don't know what I thought, but I didn't guess that your touch would be warm to me."

Edward smiled and massaged her shoulders gently. "We're the same temperature now. It's all relative, when you think about it, love."

"It's a pleasant surprise."

"I want you to close your eyes, Bella."

She took a deep breath and then straightened her shoulders.

"Tell me what you smelled just then," he continued, bringing his nose close to her neck and breathing her in.

"Rain," she said immediately. "A storm. I can smell the electricity in the air. Cut grass and the sap of a pine tree. Fresh turned dirt. Pollen. Alice, Maggie, and you."

The last word was a soft sigh, and she turned gracefully in his arms to meet his waiting lips. He has expected her to be gentle, but the tidal wave of feeling that came with their kiss took both of them by surprise. Bella's lips moved fiercely with his, her tongue demanding entrance to his mouth. She tasted of lilac and spring rain, honey-kissed apricots ripe from the sun, with an aftertaste of fresh lemon. Edward was ravenous for her, drinking in the taste of her on his lips and his tongue, grabbing at her body and pulling her roughly against his. He thought he might never be satisfied.

She pulled away, gasping for air and grabbing at her throat.

"It hurts," she whispered. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head, as much to clear his mind as to dismiss her worry. "I'm sorry," he insisted. "You're terribly thirsty, and it's painful, I know. Come now, sniff the air again. This time, I want your thirst to drive you. Try to sense something that makes the thirst more acute."

She arched an eyebrow at him, but he smiled.

"I know. Just trust me."

"Always."

She closed her eyes and sniffed at the air with greater purpose. Edward could tell the exact moment that she smelled the mob of red deer only three kilometers away. Bella's face pinched and grew more focused as she turned her head toward the scent. He was still holding on to her shoulders tightly, but he could feel her muscles tensing, readying themselves to run. He released her and her eyes flashed open, looking toward where she'd smelled the herd and then back at Edward.

"Go," he whispered.

She paused for only a moment before turning and darting off toward the scent. She was fast, dashing like a lithe gazelle along the foot path without making a sound. Bella tossed her head back and laughed as she increased her speed. The afternoon was already darkening with the coming storm, and Bella's hair streaked across the bleak sky like an auburn flag.

"You can go faster than that," Edward taunted, easily pulling ahead of her. "Catch me if you can."

With a burst of speed, Edward ran off the path and into the dense woods, weaving in and out of the branches with ease. Bella came up behind him, surprising him as she leaped into a nearby tree and swung herself ahead. Edward laughed and ran up beside Bella, pushing himself to the edge of his speed and only barely keeping pace with her. She was full of life and speed.

They were nearing the herd and instinctively Bella slowed her pace, approaching the group with stealth.

"How?" she whispered, her voice soft on the wind.

"You'll know. Give yourself over to your senses and follow your instincts."

She nodded, her red eyes hungry as she watched the deer. The herd sensed the vampires' approach and the large male stepped out in front of the females, his ears twitching as he strained to hear the predator that approached. These deer weren't used to predatory attacks. Big cats weren't native to Thetford, so for centuries their only natural predators were vampires.

"Now," Edward said, his voice calm though he felt far from it.

Bella sprinted into the clearing and leapt at the buck, her arms and fingers outstretched like a bird of prey might extend its talons. The rest of the herd scattered as she flew through the air, her teeth bared. A snarl broke the quiet in the clearing as she latched onto the great deer. As if on cue, a streak of lightening lit the sky, silent, still too far away to make a sound. Bella wrenched the buck's head back and found his jugular with her razor sharp teeth, purring in contentment as the blood hit her tongue.

Edward moved to adjust himself as he stood watching her in all of her feral glory. She was terrifying and deadly, but beautiful at the same time. And he wanted her. Covered in the blood of her kill, her clothes dirty from wrestling the beast to the ground, and still growling lowly from the heat of the kill, he wanted her. As she released the drained buck, he stalked over to her.

She let the head drop to the ground with a dull thud and met him with a look of dark desire in her eyes. He covered her mouth with his, grabbing her chin in his hand roughly as he tasted the blood on her lips. Around them, the air felt charged with their desire and the coming storm. Edward growled at the taste of the blood and Bella echoed the sound, running her nails over his chest. Her nails ripped into the fabric of his shirt, and he felt them dig into his skin, not cutting, but causing a surprising sting of pain.

He lifted her, wrapping her legs around his waist, and ran with her over to a tree. It groaned loudly under the pressure as he slammed her body against the hard trunk. Bella arched her back and wrapped her hand around his neck, her fingers pulling roughly at his hair until he gasped in pain.

"Sorry," she squeaked, easing her grip but finding his lips again immediately.

Edward shook his head and grunted in pleasure as her hips moved against him, the tree shaking as they moved. Somewhere deep within, he remembered that at some point they would need to go back to the castle where Alice and Maggie were waiting. That was the only thing that stopped him from ripping the clothes from her body. Still, he was none too gentle and Bella's sweater did not survive unscathed.

They needed no words. Their bodies knew one another's and they moved together intuitively. He paused when he didn't feel the familiar sting of heat as he entered her. Instead, her body enveloped him, smooth and warm and perfect. Her heels dug into his backside as she rocked her hips in time with his. Edward reached up and pulled her long hair back, exposing her neck to mouth. He nibbled along the column, reveling in the freedom to use his teeth on her skin without causing pain. Silent flashes of lightning lit the clearing as they made love, highlighting their bodies as they moved together.

Bella reacted to the feel of his teeth immediately, her fingers clawing down his back, applying just enough pressure that he cried out in pleasure, not pain. The clearing echoed with their noises, grunts and moans that bounced off of the trees surrounding them. They came together, crying out each other's names in the growing dark as the first rumble of thunder sounded around them.

* * *

"That was different," Bella said, her head cradled on Edward's shoulder as they lay in the clearing.

Edward had buried the deer for her after they'd finished and they'd both silently stowed their clothes within a tree to prevent them from getting wet and laid down against the trunk together. He chuckled at her understatement as the first drops of rain fell upon them. Neither of them moved.

"Oh? I thought it was same old, same old," he said cavalierly.

Bella smacked him lightly, but still left a sting on his skin.

"Joking." Edward kissed her lightly on the temple. "Tell me what it's been like for you?"

Bella shrugged and sniffed the air, her eyes darting around the clearing and then back to Edward's face.

"You know, I'm sure," she began quietly. "I see everything all at once, but it isn't overwhelming the way you'd think it should be. I can process it all. The smells . . . they're just everywhere, and if I think hard enough, I can figure out what everything is. I can feel even the slightest vibration around me, even the disturbances in the air. And I don't think I'll need reading glasses any longer."

"You remember your glasses?" Edward asked, only mildly surprised.

"There's a lot still there," she said, pointing at her temple but staring far off in the distance. "But it's all murky. Everything is so _clear_ now; my memories are cloudy, and I can't tell if it's because I'm forgetting them or because I'm remembering them with human senses. I remember Charlie. And Jake."

Edward smiled and rubbed her shoulder. "That's good. We have the pictures if they ever get too fuzzy."

Bella was quiet for a long time, turning her pale hand over in the driving rain and watching as the water ran down her arm in rivulets.

"It's all different than I expected," she said finally. "After the way you spoke about newborns, I guess I just expected to wake up and try to latch onto the first thing that moved. But I have control; it wasn't something I expected."

"It wasn't something either Alice or I expected either," Edward admitted. "You're not a typical newborn by a long shot, Bella."

"Really? Is something wrong with me?"

She ran her hands over her body as though checking to make sure she was whole. Edward stopped her hands and brought them to her lips.

"You're perfect. You're just far more controlled than we ever could ever imagine."

"Why do you think that is?"

Edward played with the edges of her hair as he thought quickly through the possibilities. "The most likely reason—to me—is your gift. Maybe you're shielding yourself from some of the crazed feelings we all experience as newborns."

"The feelings are most definitely heightened," Bella murmured, running a finger up Edward's arm and pausing at the hollow of his collar bone. "I'm sorry if I hurt you when I scratched your chest."

He ran his fingers over his chest, showing Bella that there were no marks left. "We heal quickly," he said with a wink. "And I didn't mind the pain; it's just another reminder that we're equals now."

"I feel as though I'm riding an emotional tidal wave," Bella said, looking up at him. "One minute, I feel like my eyes can't move fast enough to take in all of these new and amazing sights, and the next, I feel like I could cry my eyes out only . . . well, the tears don't come."

"They never will," Edward said somberly. "Not that you won't wish that they would. Tears, I think, help soothe the ache, and when we literally _can't_ shed a tear, it makes the pain more intense."

Bella nodded, a look of understanding on her face. "It's not all overwhelming, though; my feelings for you are more intense, more . . . demanding of my attention, if you will. I only wonder how we'll have enough hours in the day."

"Oh?" Edward asked, quirking a smile as he pulled her close. "Why's that?"

"I feel as though I may never have enough of you," she whispered, her voice serious. "I can't imagine how to divide my time between loving you and hunting and exploring my new senses, and of course, the papers. Alice was right, of course. I _do_ want to get back to work."

Edward couldn't hide his surprise, pulling back away from Bella to look at her full in the eyes.

"You heard us?" he asked. "But how much?"

"I can't say for sure, but I think I heard everything. I focused mainly on you, though. Your voice, your breathing, the way you paced back and forth when you became agitated—you were with me completely, Edward."

"I never left your side," he whispered, swallowing thickly. "I couldn't be sure you knew, but I didn't want to miss a moment with you."

"I knew, and it _did_ make a difference."

He kissed her gently, reverently, wrapping his arm around her midsection and pulling her body closer to his. Bella moved to deepen and speed the kiss, but Edward held her back, stroking her hair lightly as their mouths moved together.

"Something happened just after I bit you," Edward said, the note of pain and remorse evident in his voice. "I . . . heard you again. Do you remember? Did you let me in?"

Bella nodded and then cupped his face. "I did, but I don't know exactly how. I had a lot of time on my hands while I was burning," she said with a chuckle. "Time that I spent getting to know the ins and outs of this strange block between our minds. I think with practice I can make it do what I want, but it seems to be easier to hold in place than to move it so that someone can get in."

Edward's eyes searched hers, and he licked his lips in excitement. The thought that one day Bella would be able to let him into her mind enthralled him.

"You want me to try now, don't you?" Bella asked with a smile.

"Only if you want to," he said, looking down.

"Mmm hmm," Bella murmured, sitting up on her knees so that she was facing him. "I think it will be easier if we're touching."

Edward allowed her to move his hands to her waist. He held her cautiously, not wanting to interrupt her concentration. He marveled at the way she set her jaw, furrowed her brows, and then looked into his eyes with singular determination. Bella rested her fingertips on his temple, barely applying any pressure.

"I need you to try." Her voice sounded strained.

"Don't trouble yourself . . ." Edward floundered, worried that the stress would set off the newborn tantrum that he'd been waiting for since she awoke.

"It's not a trouble, but I need to feel you searching in order to let you in . . . at least for now."

He looked into her eyes and pushed his gift forward, concentrating on Bella's mind and ignoring all distractions around them. At first, he only saw broken images that didn't make sense: a rose colored towel, candlelight, his own face. Bella was thinking about the night he had bit her.

_I love you_. Her voice was mellow in his mind, distinctly her own. _I know you think it was a mistake, but I'm glad, Edward. It was perfect, exactly the way I wanted it. You were happy, I was happy, it was the right time._

"But it was an accident," he murmured in response.

_So? Would you have waited just so you could plan it perfectly?_

"Yes. Of course."

Bella chuckled. _Silly. It was perfect because it was you. That's all that matters to me. That's all that's _ever_ mattered to me._

"Thank you," Edward whispered, leaning forward and kissing her lips.

The shield snapped back into place as soon as their lips met, and Edward felt the loss of Bella's voice within his head acutely. For centuries, he'd bemoaned the fact that he couldn't get away from other's thoughts. Now, he thought he could listen to Bella's mind for the rest of eternity and never get bored.

"Have you had your fill?" he asked when they broke apart.

"Of you? Not hardly."

Edward chuckled and drew his finger across her silent chest, making her nipple stand at attention. "I should hope not. I meant are you still thirsty?"

Bella cupped her throat and swallowed with a grimace. "The burn is still there, but it's not as bad as before."

"The burn is always there, but it gets manageable. It becomes harder to deny as we get thirstier. In the beginning, you'll need to feed fairly regularly to stem your greater thirst. But I can go days without feeding and be fine. We'll do whatever you need."

"I think I'm OK," Bella said, releasing her throat. "I'd like to see Alice and Maggie again. I'm sure they're getting worried."

"Doubtful," Edward said with a chuckle. "If Alice were worried, she'd _be_ here."

Bella threw her head back, letting her ringing laughter sound throughout the clearing. "Good point. Still, I'd like to get back."

Edward handed Bella her clothes, and she dusted them off. "Only a few rips," she said, shaking the sweater in front of her. The fabric protested her rough treatment, making a loud rending sound. "Oops."

"I think it's fine, love. You look far better than I did after my first hunt."

"Oh? You weren't a natural at something?"

Bella winked at him as she pulled the messy sweater over her head. Edward snorted laughter as he straightened his shirt. The clearing was quiet except for the rain drumming on the leaves and their own laughter.

_Deer droppings. We must be close. Wonder if Reed will get his first buck today . . ._

Edward froze and crouched, sniffing the air frantically. He couldn't smell the hunters yet, but they were close. Too close. Bella sensed his panic and crouched low to the ground, her hands out to either side in an instinctively defensive posture. Edward watched in what felt like slow motion as Bella tilted her head up and sniffed the air. As she did, a gust of wind tore through the clearing, bringing the scent of more deer, fallen trees, and the hunters with it.

Edward leapt at Bella, dodging her clawing fingers and ignoring the snarl that erupted from her lips as he pulled her into a vice-like grip. She was deadly strong, but Edward was fast and practiced. He took off with her in his arms, holding her as she fought and thrashed to get at the scent. Bella roared in anguish when he bobbed and weaved through the forest away from the scent, screaming at him to let her go, but he held her tight. He knew, despite the instinct to kill, she would hate herself for making such a mistake. Even if Bella injured him in the process, he would do what he could to prevent her from suffering that guilt.

Edward tried to keep track of the trees as they flew through the forest, but Bella's screeching and clawing made it difficult to concentrate. He slammed them into a large pine tree, shaking the forest around them and cracking the trunk of the tree with the force of the blow. Bella sprung free of his embrace, and climbed the tree like a cat, perching on one of the branches.

"Bella!" Edward called, his voice low and forceful. "You don't want to do this. Come down to me."

"I want it, Edward," she cried, her voice keening in the desire for blood. "I _need_ it."

She leapt over his head, but he judged where she would land and dashed over to where she should have touched down. Bella saw his move and adjusted, swinging from a low hanging branch and catapulting herself further through the forest. She landed on another branch and immediately launched herself forward. Her strength and speed made it difficult for Edward to keep pace.

"Bella, listen to me," he commanded. "You will never forgive yourself if you kill those people, Bella. It is a father and his son. Do you hear me? Listen to me, Goddammit!"

Bella froze at the edge of a ravine, and Edward nearly barreled into her. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, but it was unnecessary; Bella was no longer fighting. Below them, Edward could see the two hunters walking through the forest, blissfully unaware that their death was stalking them.

"Stop breathing," Edward whispered calmly. "It's unnecessary and without it, you'll be able to think again."

Bella listened, her shoulders no longer heaving up and down. She stood still as a statue, a Romanesque goddess with a torn and blood-stained sweater to add to her ferocity. The men below, Edward thought, would welcome death from such a beauty as his Bella.

"Come with me," he murmured, running his lips against the shell of her ear until she shivered.

He hoped to distract her, knowing that newborns were fickle, so that he could pull her away before the wind shifted and Bella could taste them on the breeze. Just as she leaned into him, he realized his mistake. She took a deep breath just as the wind gusted. The air around them was literally teeming with the scent of human blood. Bella's flaming eyes widened and her nostrils flared. She threw Edward's arms off of her with a vicious snarl and flashed further down the ravine. She crouched low, her head bowed in a challenge to him, daring him to try to stop her. Edward held out his hands and looked at her kindly.

"Please, Bella," he whispered. "Stop for me."

The cords on her neck stood out when she threw her head back in agony. Edward saw recognition on her face: she knew who was asking her to stop and she wanted to obey, but the call of the scent was driving her nearly insane with thirst.

Bella knotted her small hands at her side in tight fists. As the wind buffeted them with the tantalizing scent, Edward gauged the distance between them. He calculated how long it would take him to reach her, how much force he would need to restrain her, and how much damage he would do to the surrounding area when he knocked her to the ground. The noise alone would alert the hunters, but he hoped it would make them run—not investigate.

As he planted his feet and readied himself to lunge at the woman he loved, Bella began to shake and opened her mouth. A thin scream of anguish escaped her mouth, echoing around the ravine before she wrapped her arms around herself and simply disappeared from sight.

The hunters below froze, their thoughts confused by the sound and a brief glimpse they thought they saw of Bella. Edward ran when their attention was diverted, hiding himself from their view and praying that they didn't journey up the side of the embankment looking for the woman they suspected was in danger. He buried his hands in his hair as he looked frantically around the woods. Had he blinked and missed her running away? Was she up a tree?

He sniffed and let out a groan of terror when he could no longer smell her. She'd vanished from sight and from his senses. Edward barely registered Alice's and Maggie's thoughts approaching him from the side. He spun in place, looking for some trace of her.

Alice arrived at his side and caught him by the shoulders, his eyes wildly searching hers for answers. She showed him that she'd seen what happened and that Bella was still making choices. She was _somewhere_.

"But I don't know where she's gone, Edward," Alice said softly.

* * *

_**A/N:** Yeah ... that was evil. I know. And I'm not going to tell you what's what until next chapter. No matter how much you may beg. ;) But trust ... this is key. I will, however, accept any and all guesses! They make my day like NOTHING else. I'm just sayin'. Much love to all of you. And if you have a minute, visit my profile page. I have some important links regarding my original work. I hope to have news on that front sometime soon. Keeping my fingers crossed. As always, of course, anything I do in the original work won't affect my fanfic. I'm not pulling to publish. ;) Thanks so much for your continued support. ~Jen_


	24. A Strange Gift

_Thick as thieves the last of leaves_

_In the winter sun_

_Holding fast this freezing branch_

_Is home to us_

_Step, step right over the line_

_And onto borrowed time_

_When it's life not waiting to die_

_Waiting to divide, to divide_

_**Borrowed Time**__, A Fine Frenzy 2007_

_**Disclaimer:**__ OK. I admit it. I own _Twilight_. The hardcover. As well as _New Moon, Eclipse, _and _Breaking Dawn. _The rights to the characters in those books, however, belong to some chick named Steph. ;)_

_My eternal gratitude to my betas, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. You'd be amazed how many times I need them to hold my hand._

* * *

_Craving._

Bella had never known desire, never known _need_, until the moment she first smelled the hint of spiced decadence floating out of the woods. She was single-minded in her pursuit until Edward had stood in her way. She fought him—fought _her Edward_—to get to it. Even in her thirst-ravaged mind she knew how traitorous her actions must have seemed.

She'd scratched at his face with her nails, _growled_ at him. The bloodlust had driven her mad; but even at the very brink of her control, Edward's voice brought her back.

"_Please, Bella," he whispered. "Stop for me."_

And somehow, she had. She'd done it for him. She would do anything for Edward, anything within her now considerable power to please him. But the _scent_. Still it burned the sanity out of her immortal mind, made her crazy with thirst. She wanted it. She thought she'd never be sated unless she could _taste_.

She wasn't going to make it. She was going to run; she was going to give in.

She threw her head back and screamed at the futility of trying to fight. She wasn't strong enough for this, but she wished that she could be. For him.

And just as suddenly as the delicious scent had hit her, it was gone. Relief flooded Bella's senses, and she straightened out of her crouch, looking around to see what had happened. Her immortal mind had cleared completely, and she was able to look around objectively again. She still stood in the forest, surrounded by the wet, moss-covered trees and damp ground. She could see into the ravine below her as the humans paused to look up the hill. They must have heard her scream.

She darted behind a large tree so that they wouldn't see her and looked over toward where Edward was standing. He'd moved, crouching behind a tree with his hands buried in his copper hair. His face was an anguished mask of pain.

"The air must have shifted," she said softly. "I'm fine, Edward."

Edward made no move; he didn't even look in her direction. It was as if he couldn't hear her.

"That's impossible," she said in a more normal tone of voice.

Edward still didn't look her way. He turned rapidly, scanning the forest. His head was lifted high as he sniffed frantically. A low groan escaped his lips, and he tugged at his hair. Was his control being tested? That seemed highly unlikely to Bella, especially since she felt fine, but what else could be troubling him? And why wouldn't he look at her?

Bella took a tentative sniff around. Edward's scent was there, faded but still with her. She lifted the tatters of her sweater to her nose and sniffed again. The material was the source of Edward's smell. As Bella took a faltering step toward Edward, the air around her shimmered.

Her voice reverberated around her as she cried out at the illusion. It must be some sort of trick her eyes were playing on her; the air shouldn't be moving. She took another step and again the space around her appeared to distort slightly. Bella cocked her head to the side, trying to determine what was causing the strange disturbance around her. Suddenly, it hit her. The air around her was being displaced by some sort of bubble as she moved.

Bella lifted her palm, waiting for the gentle kiss of rainwater. There was moisture in the air around her, a slight breeze even, but nothing close to the steady drum of droplets she expected to feel. A barrier of some kind surrounded Bella—something that allowed her to see out, but kept the outside world away from her. Was _this_ why Edward wasn't looking at her? What had she done?

Now that she was aware of the invisible wall, Bella realized that she could feel the edges of it. She could sense the steady thrum of rain on it, the buffeting wind. She could even push against it with her fingers to stretch it out. The sensation when she touched it was familiar—it felt exactly like when Edward had pushed against her mind earlier. The bubble around her was her shield, but it had undergone a rather dramatic transformation.

Bella heard the rustle of leaves and crouched low to the ground, anticipating someone's arrival. It was disconcerting not to be able to smell the intruder. Her body relaxed as Alice's spiky-haired head crested the hill, and Maggie followed close behind.

Alice arrived at Edward's side as he was turning frantically in circles. She caught his shoulders, and they shared one of their silent conversations. Maggie stood behind the two of them, her red eyes darting around the forest suspiciously.

"But I don't know where she's gone, Edward," Alice whispered.

Bella surmised that they thought she wasn't with them in the forest anymore. She desperately wanted to put Edward's mind at ease, to let him know that she was right in front of him. However, she had two very real problems facing her. First, she wasn't entirely sure how to pull her shield back. She guessed that if she tried, she could draw it within herself again. But doing that would lead to her second problem.

The hunters were still out there. Bella had called on her shield when she was in desperate need, and it responded without her even knowing exactly what it was doing. To call it back and expose herself to that scent would be to tempt fate for a third time. Bella knew enough about the scent of humans now to know that she could not hope to master that urge yet.

While Alice and Edward appeared to be oblivious to everything around them save for each other, Maggie continued to search the forest for clues. Bella remembered that she had spent years as a nomad. Her time alone as a huntress seemed to have honed her vampiric senses; she was looking directly at Bella.

It unnerved Bella to see Maggie's red eyes boring through the spot where Bella stood, hidden. The air around Bella was fresh and clear of human scent so she knew that her shield held strong. What had drawn Maggie's attention? When Bella looked up, she saw the rain water sliding down the outside of her shield-bubble. From the other side, it would be almost unnoticeable unless someone stared at the void as Maggie was doing.

Maggie squinted and took a step toward Bella, her pale hand outstretched in front of her. Bella could tell that the ancient vampire didn't trust what her eyes were seeing. She wanted to touch to be sure. Panic seized Bella. She had no idea what an outside intrusion like that would do to her shield. Instinctively, she darted away from the group at full speed, putting at least a hundred yards between them.

Maggie stared at the spot Bella had just vacated for several seconds before dropping her hand and shaking her head. She frowned before turning her attention back to the others. Bella was safe . . . for now. She was beginning to feel the exertion of holding her shield around her in this way. She needed to get away from these woods, away from the scent of the hunters, before her shield collapsed.

"How do I let them know?" she asked herself, tapping her upper lip in deep thought.

Alice and Edward were still conversing silently, and all at once, Bella knew what she needed to do.

_Alice, I'm going back to the castle. I need to go alone. I won't need company until I'm safely inside._

She made her decision and looked up. Alice's face cleared, and she looked around the woods perplexed.

"What the hell was that, Ali?" Edward asked, his voice harsh with distress.

"She decided to go back to the castle," Alice replied, her eyes blinking rapidly. "And she wants to be alone."

"Sod that," Edward said, storming past his sister. "Where is she? I want to see her now."

"You know I can't . . ."

"Bloody well _try!_" Edward's eyes were stormy, his lips twisted in frustration and anger. He stepped back when Alice recoiled from him. "I want to know where she is, Ali. I'm sorry."

"I know," she said, placing her small hand on his broad shoulder. "I think you will in about a half hour."

"Just so's we're clear—that wis tha strangest thing I ever did see," Maggie said, her hands on her hips as she looked between the two siblings.

"What?" the two asked together.

"Tha exchange! Mind-read thoughts and choices tha hae no been made yet . . . I'd think yer all mad were it no tha' I seen ye do this afore."

Bella chuckled to herself, thankful that Maggie's spirited personality could yet again diffuse the intensity between Edward and Alice. She turned away from the small group as their voices lowered. Alice's vision of Bella's choice seemed to quell the fear from earlier; now, they began wagering guesses as to what caused Bella's sudden disappearance. Bella wondered if Maggie would tell them what she saw, or whether she would wait to talk to Bella later.

About a mile from the castle, the rain began to come down in torrents, pounding against Bella's shield. While not physically exhausted, she felt drained with the effort of holding the shield in place. Just as hail began to ping against the strange bubble, Bella gave up her hold on the shield and it collapsed around her.

A left-over human instinct made her cringe against the pummeling ice pellets. To her shock, the golf ball sized spheres felt like little more than leaves brushing against her hard skin. She laughed as one exploded off the end of her nose, fracturing into tiny particles before her eyes.

Bella leapt into the air, full of exuberance now that she'd evaded the tempting scent of humans and nearly made it back to the castle. She alit on branch and surveyed the thinning woods around her. The rain and hail only clouded her vision slightly; looking over the horizon, Bella could see the topmost tower of Carlisle Cullen's family home.

Thoughts of Carlisle, and naturally the rest of Edward's family, doused Bella's good humor. There was so much she had yet to uncover about the Volturi and the power they wielded over the Cullens. She dashed off toward the castle, eager to dry off and begin work with the papers as quickly as possible. As she traveled through the forest, she was surprised by how many different scents assaulted her nose. The rain changed them, but they weren't washed away the way Bella had assumed they would be. She could still smell herself and Edward along the path they took toward their hunt. _So much for a bloodhound's smeller being unbeatable_, she thought smugly. Even a bloodhound would lose a scent in a torrential downpour. _But not a vampire._

* * *

Bella heard Edward enter the castle, his soft, strained voice lilting up the stairs to her.

"Bella? Are you here?"

"You know where I am now," she replied in a soft whisper.

He was behind her in a flash, his arms around her waist and his nose buried in her still wet hair. She smiled; leaning back against him.

"I cannot describe to you what I thought—what I _feared_—had happened to you." The pain of his worry made his voice low and rasping.

"It was really quite amazing, actually," Bella said as lightly as she could manage. She turned his arms and brought her hands to his face. "It was my shield, Edward."

He shook his head, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"But it's a mental shield. It couldn't . . ."

"But it did," Bella interrupted with a smile.

Edward continued to shake his head. "Impossible."

A sudden and defiant anger ripped through Bella, and she pulled away from him, her eyes boring into his. "I tell you it _is_ possible," she snarled. The sound of her voice startled her so that she stood upright and blinked rapidly.

Edward regarded her calmly for a moment and then smiled. "I'm sorry. What I meant was that I've never heard of anything like it; I didn't mean to discredit you. I'm astounded, love. Forgive me."

"I'm sorry," Bella said, her fingers covering her lips, still in shock at her own churlish behavior. "I didn't mean to snarl like a beast at you."

Edward shrugged unaffected. "You're a newborn. Beastly behavior is to be expected." He waggled his eyebrows and winked suggestively before chuckling. "Tell me more about what you think happened, but perhaps come down to the library? Alice and Maggie are waiting."

As they walked down the hall, Edward kept his hand on the small of Bella's back. She felt him tug on the back of her shirt, and she paused, turning around to look up at him.

"You really are doing so well with all of this," he said. "I just want you to know that."

"I don't know what 'normal' is for newborn vampires," Bella said softly. "I'm just doing what comes naturally to me . . . whether or not it's right."

Edward nodded and kissed her forehead, sending an electric jolt of desire through her body. "There's going to be a lot of questions. You mustn't be upset with yourself if you react to what we ask. Mood swings are, unfortunately, a natural part of the transformation."

"Mood swings," Bella murmured. "That's an understatement if I ever heard one."

Edward's low chuckle echoed in the hallway. "Come on. Alice is getting impatient."

"She's no tha only one," Maggie's soft voice called.

Maggie sat, perched atop one of the small bookshelves, her legs crossed beneath herself. Fingers tented in front of her face, she appeared deep in thought. Alice paced, her feet a blur of motion and her eyes unfocused, unseeing. Bella had become familiar with the look on her face; she was lost in the future.

"Wha' is she seeing?" Maggie asked Edward as he and Bella walked into the room.

"She's looking at new possibilities regarding the Volturi, as well as Bella's future. And yours. And mine. Alice is spread rather thin at the moment."

"It's nothing," Alice said, shaking her head and coming back to the present. "So tell us, Bella. What happened out there?"

"As I told Edward, it was my shield. I don't know exactly how it happened, but I think it had something to do with the smell of the humans."

"The scent triggered a more powerful version of your shield?" Edward leaned against a table and tilted his head to the side in thought.

Bella shook her head. "No, not exactly. I knew I couldn't resist that scent for very long, but I heard you asking me to stop. I needed _something_ to take away the smell and then something did. I think it was a defense mechanism."

"So you didn't will your shield around you then, it just . . . happened?" Edward continued.

"Yes. I wished to be strong enough to avoid the scent and then . . . it was gone. If it hadn't have gone away, I wouldn't have been able to resist."

"I believe you there," Edward said. "It's just very hard to imagine that your gift reacted without your control."

"Wha' was it like when ye first awoke, Edward?" Maggie asked quietly. "Did ye awake wi' the power to focus on one person's thoughts or did they all hit ye at once? How long until ye mastered it?"

Edward sat quietly. Bella knew that Maggie had hit him hard with logic. Maggie smiled and leapt off of her perch to stand in front of Bella.

"You saw me," Bella whispered.

"Was it ye, then? I thought, but could no be sure."

"It was. I'm sorry I ran, but I didn't know what would happen if you tried to touch me."

"How hard is it to hold in place?" Maggie asked.

"At first, it was like nothing. But the longer I held it, the harder it became. I wasn't tired exactly, just strained. I think that the rain beating against it made it more difficult. I lost it about a mile from the castle."

"Ye made the right choice," Maggie said, nodding. "There 'us sommat wrong wi' the rain, like a bubble. I wanted tae touch it."

"And that's why I ran," Bella said with a smile.

There was an unnatural silence in the room as the four vampires stood motionless and thinking. Bella wondered what Edward was picking up from the other two. Alice had been unusually quiet—subdued—during this exchange. Edward's face remained unchanged, but Bella could almost read the thoughts running through his mind. He was worried, angry perhaps, about what he was hearing from his sister and his friend.

"Don't go flying off the handle, Maggie," Edward said, his voice a low snarl. "There's no need for hysterical reaction."

"Hysterical, he says," Maggie scoffed. "Wha' do ye propose, then? Force 'er shield 'til th' breaking point, push 'er beyond 'er means and 'er control?"

Maggie drew herself up in front of Edward, her shoulders held back and her chin jutted out in challenge. Though she was over a foot shorter than him, she didn't look small. Her confidence flowed out of her and Bella could see her gift at work, though it didn't affect her belief one way or the other. She simply appreciated the vampire's talent for what it was.

"What she proposes will work," Alice said blandly. "It will work well and you know it."

"It's rash," Edward replied, his lips turned down in displeasure.

"It's _no_ rash. It's sensible . . . something _you'd _no be familiar wi', Edward."

Maggie's arms were crossed in front of her and she looked a bit like a petulant child—a child with fiery red eyes and the determination to rip a person's head off if pushed too far. Bella would have found that thought funny in another situation; as it was, she was angry with the three of them for having a conversation about her without including her.

"The Scottish Highlands are too far away. How do you propose to move her?"

"Yer a vampire, are you no? Can ye not swim?"

"I hardly think that she . . ." Edward said before Alice cut him off.

"She's as strong as you. Stronger . . ."

"Will you all stop it?" Bella screeched, her hands over her ears, and her eyes squeezed shut.

Edward was at her side, his hands soft in her hair.

"And you," she turned on him, eyes blazing even as her head leaned into his touch. "Stop coddling me. Alice is right, you know. I _am_ strong. I want to know what the trouble is; I want to help."

"I'm not coddling . . ."

"Let's see. 'How do we _move her_?' 'I hardly think she . . .' what were you going to say? Hardly think I'm ready? That I'm not strong enough?"

"But you're not ready!" Edward burst out, hands up in the air. "Strong, naturally, but you've just awoken, had your first hunt and found a new and rather perplexing side of your gift that you _can't control_. Forgive me, Bella, but you're still a newborn."

"And ye know she doesna want tae kill a human," Maggie said emphatically. "If yer so worried aboot 'er control, why do ye insist she stay here . . . surrounded by people?"

Bella looked between Maggie and Edward, their faces equally angry. She finally got the whole picture. Maggie had suggested a sparsely populated place where Bella could hone her control, and Edward had gone ballistic. Bella admitted that the thought of traveling, being surrounded by people on a train or plane, sounded impossible. She doubted that she could hold her shield for that long, and she didn't even question whether she could control herself around the smell of human blood. But Bella wanted to be in a place where she could run and hunt with Edward without the constant fear of running into hunters. She couldn't understand why Edward _wouldn't_ want that.

"What did she mean about swimming?" Bella asked.

"She thinks we can swim from here to Scotland," Edward explained, a note of annoyance in his voice.

"And you don't?" Bella asked, her voice softening.

"It's not that," he hedged. "I mean, of course we _can_. We're perfectly capable of swimming long distances . . . I just don't believe it's necessary."

"Do you think we should run?"

"No, I don't think we need to leave _here_," Edward insisted stubbornly.

Maggie huffed and rolled her eyes, but Bella turned to Alice.

"What do you think, Alice?" Bella asked, turning away from Edward.

"If we stay here, you'll kill a human," Alice said.

Bella noticed the first spark of emotion on Alice's face, a flash of recognition followed by true concern for Bella. Alice walked slowly over to Bella and put her hands on her shoulders.

"We all have so much faith in you, but you need to give Edward a break," she said. "He knows too well what a newborn is capable of, and he's worried for you."

"You don't have to make excuses for me," Edward said tersely.

"I'm not. I'm explaining to her, which is what _you_ should be doing. She's doing so well you forget how new this all is for her."

Bella looked over Alice's head at Edward who shrugged his shoulders as he slipped his hands into his pockets.

"I'm sorry that I got angry . . . again," Bella said, squeezing Alice's shoulders gently before walking around her. "I don't like people talking about me as though I'm not there."

"Well, that hasn't changed at all, has it?" Edward murmured, reaching out for her hand as she approached him.

"Why are you concerned about swimming to Scotland? The Highlands are sparsely populated and full of wildlife for us to hunt . . . it seems like a really smart option to me."

"I'm not concerned, per se. I just don't see why we have to leave England."

"Silly, sentimental Sassenach," Maggie said, snorting. "This part o' the island is too small, too packed full o' warm bodies for the hungry newborn. It isn't fair to expect 'er no to bite them. Unnatural, it is."

Bella rolled her eyes at Maggie's end statement, but squeezed Edward's hand and put her hand on his cheek.

"We can ship the documents," she said. "It's not ideal, but surely you have the means to transport them safely."

"Yes, we can transport them however you see fit." Edward's eyes darted around the room, around the large library.

"So, yer not worried aboot Bella and yer no worried aboot your precious papers. Wha' is it then, Edward?"

"It's this," Alice said softly. She gestured with her hand around the room, encompassing not only the library but the entire castle. "We haven't left this castle, not for any real stretch of time, since our family was taken. This was their home, and if we leave, it's like leaving them."

Maggie was quiet after that. What more could she say? Bella herself had thought that Edward's reservations were more rational—not that they didn't make sense, but they couldn't be answered with logic. This was personal and only Edward could convince himself that leaving wouldn't be traitorous.

Alice moved over in front of her brother and they stood, forehead to forehead for a number of minutes, silently communicating.

"Thanks, Ali," he whispered.

She reached up and touched his face. "Anytime, brother."

Edward put his arm around Alice and moved her to his side. He looked up at Bella and Maggie with a more natural smile on his face.

"So," he said, "when do we leave?"

* * *

_**A/N**__: Props to those of you who guessed that it was Bella's shield that caused her to disappear last chapter. When I first got the idea of for this story, Bella's disappearance was the first, clearest picture that I got in my head. The story really grew around her gift. So this chapter was really important to me, so that you could see what she is potentially capable of. She is a complete shield; damn useful if you ask me. ;) I hope you continue to enjoy. Thanks so much for your continued to support! ~Jen_


	25. Night Swimming

_Take another bite_

_It'll be alright_

_What's wrong will soon feel right_

_Dangerous tonight_

_Take another sip_

_Let it kiss your lips_

_And let a little drip on your thighs_

_If you let me I'll untie your sensuality_

_I'll open up your heart and satisfy my greed_

_**Dangerous Tonight**__, Alice Cooper 1991_

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own _Twilight_, but I think you knew that. ;) I'll tell you what I _do_ own though. I own an insane amount of dog toys, all very used and abused._

_My thanks go to my beta team of course, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. Thanks also to you, for reading. You have my undying affection for that._

* * *

_Southwold Coast, the North Sea_

Edward stood on the sand, the waves crashing around his feet as he listened to the sounds of a sleeping village. Bella was in the water already—he could see her dark head bobbing next to Maggie's several hundred yards out. Their bright red eyes glowed in the light of the full moon as they watched him on shore. Alice stood to his right, waiting.

_This is the right thing to do_, she repeated in his head.

"I know," he replied.

_Doesn't make it any easier to walk away, does it?_

"No," he whispered. "A woman is rising to take care of her child. We shouldn't be on the shore if she looks out."

Without another word, the two siblings walked into the waves, their bodies unaffected by the pounding water. They disappeared like silent submarines into the surf, the murky water engulfing them without a sound.

Once he was completely submerged, Edward kicked off the bottom and raced through the shallow depths. He kept close to the sandy bottom, following it down and letting the weight of the water rest heavy on his shoulders as he swam against the current. Swimming was effortless for him, for all vampires. Carlisle once theorized that vampires' abilities were more honed for water than they were for land, though only marginally so. Water held a more powerful draw for Edward, however, than simply the ease of swimming. While underwater, his gift was somewhat muted. He still heard thoughts, but they weren't as loud or demanding as they were when he was on land. In the same way a person's hearing became lessened while underwater, so too did Edward's ability to hear thoughts.

_Too far_, Alice's voice called gently through the haze.

He smiled and did a flip, using the pliant seafloor to push off and then shoot up through the water to the surface. He emerged about twenty yards beyond where Alice, Bella, and Maggie were waiting, sending water droplets into the air as he threw his hair back.

"Show off," Maggie muttered with a snort.

Alice nodded her head in agreement, but Bella's eyes were narrowed and fixated on him. Edward chuckled, thinking that perhaps Bella would enjoy a little more showing off. Alice's voice drove like a nail in his head, warning him to rein it in. They had to travel together, at least until they got closer to the less populated Highlands in order to avoid any issues with Bella's control. Edward sighed reluctantly. Scotland was full of lochs; should Bella enjoy water play, there would be ample opportunity for such dalliances away from the prying eyes, ears, and minds of their companions.

Bella took to swimming as she had every other vampiric activity she'd engaged in thus far: with gusto and surprising speed. She relished the ability to cut through the water, never having to come up for air—and Edward loved watching her happiness. He never fully admitted to Bella one of his biggest fear about changing her; he had been frightened that she wouldn't be happy being like him. It felt silly to him now, looking at her so immersed in his world and enjoying every aspect of it, but he had worried that despite her protestations, she was getting into something that she didn't understand. He worried that she would regret after it was too late to change her mind. Most of all, he worried that_ he_ wouldn't be enough for her.

Watching as she leapt out of the water, arcing like a porpoise at play before diving back under the waves, he knew he had been wrong to worry. Bella had known what was right all along.

As they had agreed upon before leaving Oxford, the group remained about twenty feet below the surface. Bella reluctantly agreed to Edward holding her hand throughout the journey so that he could know immediately if something went wrong. As she told him repeatedly, it wasn't because she didn't want him to touch her. She disliked being watched over like a child. Edward knew this and understood it, but he still insisted. The fact remained that Bella was far stronger and faster than any of them. Should she decide to go after a human, they wouldn't be able to stop her. They'd be even more handicapped if she disappeared from view.

About forty-five minutes into the trip, Bella tugged on his hand and pointed up to the surface. Edward looked around them, judging how far out to sea they were and then nodded. They couldn't communicate under the water and so they needed to surface in order to talk.

Bella came up with a gasp for air. It was a leftover reflex from her humanity; breathing, though pleasant, was unnecessary for their survival. As she breathed in, she massaged her throat.

"Thirsty?" Edward asked immediately, reaching up with his free hand and running his fingers down the side of her throat.

Bella nodded, wincing. "It's pretty bad. I'm surprised."

"You shouldn't be. It's been two days since we got those deer in Thetford."

"You can go almost a week without feeding," Bella protested.

"I'm not a newborn," he said, winking.

Bella rolled her eyes just as Maggie and Alice surfaced.

"What's tha matter?" Maggie asked, shaking her dark red curls out of her face.

"The newborn needs a drink," Alice said with a smile. "And stop pouting, Bella. We've all been there."

"I wasn't pouting," Bella groused.

"You were about to," Alice countered.

"Enough," Edward whispered as Bella sighed. "How far have we traveled?"

"We've got ta be mair than halfway there," Maggie said, squinting her eyes and looking around. "I'd wager we're aboot fifty kilometers aff the coast o' Newcastle, nearing on Edinburgh."

Alice looked ahead, as Edward hoped she would, and he smiled inwardly with what he saw.

"It's safe to split up. There are no shipping vessels in the area and if you keep to your intended area, you both will be fine. _No_ deviations from Edward's directions, Bella. Do you understand me?"

Bella nodded, her face serious as she stared at Alice.

"You'll be fine," Alice said, angling herself toward Edward. "We'll meet you on the shore where we discussed before."

"It'll still be early enough?" Edward asked.

Alice was quiet for only a moment before nodding. "It will be fine. I'll warn you if there's danger on shore."

"Check oot the sea caves along tha coast," Maggie said, off hand. "Ye know, after ye hunt the wee porpoises and such. They're beautiful, them caves. Ye'll love them, Bella."

Maggie may have acted put out by Bella's newborn needs, but she couldn't hide her true feelings from Edward. She liked Bella a great deal and had begun to think of her as a friend, something that was rare indeed for a nomadic vampire such as Maggie. In the past, most of the connections Maggie had made were transient. She liked Alice and Edward well enough and visited them more often than most other vampires because they had a steady address. But they weren't special to her. Even Edward, with whom she'd had an on again, off again relationship, was little more than an acquaintance. Though the Volturi played a large role in why Maggie had chosen to stay with the group, Bella was a big part of it as well.

Maggie eyed Edward coolly, deciding whether or not to address his blatant appraisal of her thoughts. She shrugged, knowing that he'd heard the truth, and then dove under the water.

_You'll have time to explore the caves a bit, Edward_, Alice thought as she dove under the water. _Just keep your boundaries in mind. You really don't want to lose her underwater._

"Understatement of the century, that," Edward muttered as he watched his sister disappear under the waves.

"What was the understatement of the century?" Bella asked.

Edward shook his head, but explained what Alice had said when Bella gave him a warning look.

"I imagine that would be kind of a worst case scenario, wouldn't it?" Bella asked lightly

"I can't think of much worse than losing you again, for _any_ length of time."

She squeezed his hand and brought it up to her temple. _I haven't tried to let go, have I?_ she asked in his mind.

"You're getting much better at taking your shield down," he commented with a smile, bringing her fingers to his lips.

"Alice was practicing with me yesterday," she said with a shrug. "It's all a matter of finding the edges of it and learning its boundaries."

"We have plenty of time to practice," he said. "For now, let's hunt."

Bella nodded enthusiastically and then looked around confused. "How do we go about hunting underwater?"

"You won't be able to smell your prey, but you'll be able to feel their movements in the water. Our best hope of finding them is if they are feeding; we'll be able to taste the blood in the water if they're feeding."

"And what, pray tell, _is_ our quarry?" Bella asked with a quirk of her lips.

"Porpoise. Pods of them hunt in this area." Edward turned to her, a smile on his lips as he released her hand. "You'll need to be free in order to hunt. Please . . . don't leave me, though."

"Never," she whispered, wrapping her arms around him and covering his lips with hers.

Edward could feel the urgency, the need for her filling him as her lips moved with his. He wondered if it would ever abate, if there would ever come a time when he wasn't desperate to have her. He pulled away and leaned his forehead against hers. _More_, her mind whispered to his, and he smiled.

"Later," Edward growled. "For now, you need to feed."

In the silence, Edward could hear the sound of porpoises breaking the surface for air. Bella turned her head toward the sound, and he knew she could hear as well. He nodded when her eyes sought out his.

"They are predators, too," he explained. "They will be less likely to flee when we enter their water space, but they will still sense danger from us. We will need to be quick and efficient. Do you think you will be able to hunt with me?"

"What do you mean?" Bella creased her forehead in confusion. "I've never gone on a hunt without you."

"I've been there while you hunted, but we've never been in search of prey together. I need to hunt as well, and now is as good an opportunity as any."

"I won't attack you, Edward," she said, shaking her head.

"You might," he whispered. "You know how it can be when we're hunting. I just want you to be aware of that possibility. You should not shield yourself if that comes to pass."

Bella nodded, silently, and then looked back toward the sound of the playing porpoises. She sighed and Edward let her go. When she turned around, he let himself sink under the water and waited for her to join him.

They swam through the water in the general direction of the porpoises. The water made it difficult for them to know if they were headed in the right direction. It also afforded them pretty easy mobility; the porpoise were fast swimmers, though not as fast as a vampire.

Bella sped ahead of Edward, and looked back playfully over her shoulder at him. He put on a burst of speed and caught up, his fingers brushing along the side of her body. They carried on, dipping and diving through the water until they reached a patch of water where the large predators had recently fed. Edward could taste the blood in the water. He pointed toward the surface and Bella followed him up.

Without a word, he scanned the surface and saw the pod. A group of about ten was swimming no more than twenty meters from where Bella and Edward were floating. He pointed and Bella took off under water. Edward was close on her heels.

She swam like a missile through the water, intent and focused on her goal. She grabbed the first porpoise that she saw by the tail fin and pulled it almost twenty feet down with her before she bit and drank. Edward watched her with mingled admiration and desire before taking off after his own prey.

The water was barely tinged pink with blood after Bella and Edward had had their fill. However, there were four carcasses floating at the surface that would raise alarm should any oceanographer examine the bite pattern on the dead porpoises. The teeth were very clearly humanlike.

"We need to take them to the caves. We can secure them down there, and hopefully, they will rot before they rise to the surface."

Bella nodded and gathered her two. It was not a long journey to the caves, and Edward was pleased to note that it was well before dawn. He and Bella could linger in the caves for a while after they disposed of their kills. They got lucky and found a large rock in the first cave they came to. It was large enough to weight down the bodies; Edward felt certain that the evidence of their feeding would remain underwater long enough to hide their involvement in the porpoise's demise.

Bella looked toward the surface after the bodies were buried with a question in her eyes, but Edward shook his head and pointed deeper into the caves. Bella smiled slightly and nodded. He knew just where he wanted to take her. Not far away was an underwater volcano, inactive for several thousand years. He'd been there with Emmett and Jasper before, and they'd all been amazed when they came to the surface while they were still technically below sea level.

Edward led the way, with Bella close at his side. Her fingers brushed his occasionally, and it was a comfort to him to know that she was reaching out for him. He trusted her, of course. But having a physical reminder of her presence as they swam helped him relax and enjoy their time alone.

The caves were an intricate honeycomb of limestone and sea rock, eroded by eons of exposure to the salty water and churning tide. Edward enjoyed visiting them because, though they were made of rock, they were ever-changing. Each time he returned, something about them had changed. As always, Bella was delighted with the sights, sounds, and journey they took.

They approached the underwater volcano, and Edward could see the murky moonlight filtering down from the surface. The cone of the volcano still reached the surface, allowing air and light into the cavern. Humans wouldn't recognize the subtle light of the moon, but their vampire sight allowed Bella and Edward to see the refracting light bouncing off of the rocks ahead.

Bella pulled on Edward's hand, her brows furrowed as she looked at the light. Edward smiled with delight. He enjoyed surprising her almost as much as he enjoyed being surprised by her silent mind. He jerked his head to the side in invitation, and she followed along behind him, into the center of the underwater volcano.

Bella broke the surface with a gasp. "Where are we?"

"A place I found with my brothers many years ago. It's an inactive volcano." Edward pointed up toward the night sky, just barely visible above them.

"It's amazing," she murmured.

Silently, she swam around the large room, marveling at the way the light filtered around the room. Edward stayed at the center, watching her. The moonlight played beautifully on her wet figure, sparkling softly and reflecting off of the white rock around them. Bella found some hanging cave moss, white because of so little light to feed it. She fingered it gingerly, watching as the delicate curls moved on her fingers.

"It's magical," she said, turning back to Edward, "like some underwater cathedral. I almost can't believe it's real."

"There are hundreds of little caves along the coast, but this is the only one that has an outlet to the surface."

Bella turned toward the wall, feeling her way along the sides until she found purchase with her foot. "So ... did you bring me here for the scenery?" she asked, turning to face Edward. "Or did you have ulterior motives?"

"I brought you here because I thought you would like to see it," Edward said seriously, hiding the smirk that tugged at his lips as Bella's eyes narrowed. "Though I wouldn't object to ulterior motives ..."

Bella licked her lips as Edward moved toward her, a predatory look glinting in her eyes. Watching her swim all evening and then observing her during the hunt had made him hungry for her, hungry to claim her and be claimed in return. She was stunning in the low light of the cave, her pale skin shimmering as her breath came quickly. Edward ran a finger along the line of her collarbone, tracing upwards until his thumb rested over the white ring of scars his teeth had left on her skin.

Her breath hitched, and her eyes darkened.

"Mine," he whispered, his voice low and vulnerable despite the dominant word.

"Prove it," Bella said.

Her head was cocked to the side, and her eyes dared him to take what he wanted. He slowly increased the pressure on her scar until she tilted her head back and moaned softly. He knew her well enough to know that she wanted him to move quickly, to take her without warning, but Edward was in no hurry. His face drew closer to her neck. Bella reached out and buried her fingers in Edward's hair, attempting to spur him on by pulling at the strands. He clucked his tongue as he moved more slowly, stilling her hands.

"I will prove it," he murmured, darting his tongue out and caressing the slightly raised flesh of the bite mark, "over and over again."

Quickly, and without warning, he bit down on her neck. Bella's response was immediate, bucking her hips into his and knocking them off of the perch she'd found. Though he'd used his teeth on her before, he'd never bit down exactly on the site of her scar. He'd been wanting to since the moment she woke up, eager to see if the sensitivity he'd felt on his scar correlated to sexual pleasure. _Experiment tried and we have success_, he thought to himself giddily.

As they sank lower in the water, the bodies writhing against each other as they fought for purchase underwater, Edward marveled at how light Bella's presence had made his life. He certainly never would have considered himself giddy for any reason before Bella; she'd done that. She'd freed him of so many demons just by being in his life. Perhaps it wasn't so far-fetched for him to believe that she was the key to freeing him from his final demon.

Taking Bella's hand, he coaxed her up to the surface again. She gasped for air as she came up and reached wildly for Edward. There would be no putting off their desire until later this time. Bella allowed him to lead her over to the wall. Without words, he positioned her on the wall so that her feet had traction. When she went to rip her wet shirt from her body, he grabbed her hand and shook his head. They didn't have replacement clothes; they would have to make do without removing many pieces of clothing if they didn't want to lose them underwater.

Edward trailed his fingers lightly up her torso under her shirt. Her nipples hardened under the wet shirt, and he sucked on one through the fabric. Bella cradled his head in her hands, moaning softly as his lips and tongue worked deftly on her breast.

Edward had found a ledge where he could rest his feet, and when he was comfortable enough with his footing he began to undo Bella's pants. When she saw his intention, she reached under the water and pulled down his pants as well, exposing him down to his upper thigh. She reached for him, urging him to enter her, but he shook his head and smiled. He knew that the lovemaking would be too fast, over too quickly for her to finish.

He lifted her body up, easing her pants lower as he did so until her upper body rested against the wall, and he supported her bottom with his hands. He positioned her legs over his shoulders and blew cool air over her exposed sex. Bella's legs, with her pants still wrapped around her ankles, pressed against Edward's back. She had squeezed her eyelids shut and pressed her lips together in anticipation. Her look of desperate desire was all that Edward needed to spur him forward.

Edward kissed and licked her, his tongue circling around the spots she liked best. Her fingers found their way into his hair, and she pulled harder as she got closer to the edge. He flattened his tongue against her and drew it through her folds until he reached the bunch of nerves. When he could hear her panting erratically, begging him for release, he sped the movements of his tongue faster than ever before. She came with a screech, her body bucking fiercely against the wall.

Before she fully came down from the high, Edward moved her down his body, her legs still wrapped around his torso. She hissed lightly as her body reentered the water. Edward positioned her so that as she slid down his body, he could enter her. They both gasped as he filled her, Bella's crimson eyes rolling back in her head at the welcomed intrusion.

Their bodies moved in an unrushed dance, hips circling and thrusting rhythmically. Edward was again astounded by the way everything with Bella felt natural and right. He could feel her walls tightening as she got closer to a second orgasm. He moved with her, adding pressure and speed.

"Bite me," she whispered, her voice low and rushed.

Edward brought his mouth closer to her neck, brushing the hollow of her throat with his teeth, but she shook her head.

"No," she whined. "Not there. Over ... over the scar."

Bella grunted and gripped at his shoulders as he kissed his way up her neck. The excitement of knowing he could bite her without harming her filled Edward, and he felt his chest tighten in anticipation. When his mouth hovered over top of the bite mark, he circled it firmly with his tongue. Bella groaned and ran her nails over his back, digging in just enough to make Edward curse softly.

"Please," she whispered, the word drawn out and desperate as her hips sped with his.

A growl grew in his chest as he opened his mouth. He looked at her perfect skin, scarred only with a small ring of teeth marks—_his_ teeth. Bella was his, and that scar proved it every time he looked at it. He bit down, hard enough so that he could feel her flesh give way, but not so hard that he would bite through.

Bella came unraveled beneath him, screaming with the wave of pleasure that ripped through her. The combination of Bella's orgasm and the intense satisfaction of biting pushed Edward over the edge. He groaned as he came, sucking on Bella's throat as the last of the tremors rocked through him.

Edward kissed her gently, running his tongue over the spot where he'd bitten her to be sure there were no wounds. Bella whimpered softly at the feel of his tongue there again. Once she'd recovered enough, he slipped underwater and out from between her legs so that she could pull her pants back on. When he surfaced again, Bella was smirking at him from the ledge.

"What?" he asked, shaking a stray lock of hair out of his eyes.

"You liked that almost as much as I did, didn't you?" she asked, her red eyes twinkling with delight.

"I should think so," he replied, winking.

"I meant the biting, Edward," Bella said, touching his face. "It was really something amazing when you did that. It sparked all sorts of emotions in me and I loved it ... but I was surprised how much you liked it as well."

"Biting is one of our natural instincts. The urge to do it seems greater, especially during climax. I imagine it would be equally as pleasurable for you, as well."

Bella swam away from the wall, but turned around to face Edward with a question looming in her eyes.

"Would you _want_ me to do that?" she asked, her head cocked to the side.

"I want you to do anything that will bring you pleasure," he replied without hesitation. "Though, I'd appreciate if you reined in your biting reflex enough that you didn't take my head off."

"Literally?" Bella asked, wide-eyed.

Edward snorted and swam over to her.

"Yes, literally. Our teeth are really the only thing that can cut through vampire skin. But enough about the morbid ways we can end an immortal life. Shall we get on our way to Scotland?"

Bella nodded, but the surprise was still written on her face. As they dove under, Edward wondered whether he'd frightened her with talk of ending immortal lives. He knew Bella well enough to know that she didn't frighten easily, but he'd also never gone into detail about the way one immortal could kill another. With all of the talk about the Volturi, he worried that she was seeing this suppositional talk more concretely. Would she worry that some Volturi henchman would take of _his_ head? Or even her own? Edward shook his head in frustration. Aro and his coven had been the bane of his own existence for far too long. He loathed the fact that they were becoming the bane of Bella's as well.

* * *

_The coast is clear, Edward_.

Alice's voice greeted him as they approached the shore. He looked through her eyes and saw that the early dawn light was just touching the craggy coastal beach of Wick. It was a harsh environment, barely deserving of the term beach. That was the precise reason they had chosen it as their landing point. The rocks jutted out of the scenery like so many enormous building blocks strewn about as though by a gigantic child.

Bella surfaced right next to Edward, her eyes open and ready to drink in her surroundings. They both found their footing on the sea floor and walked easily through the surf to meet Alice and Maggie.

"Nice hunt, Bella?" Maggie asked with a sly grin.

"It was very pleasurable, thanks," Bella replied with a smirk.

Alice threw her head back and laughed. "Come on, you two. We have dry clothes waiting for you. It's a bit of a hike to our new home."

Edward sighed at the mention of a new home, but remained quiet. Alice knew, and so did Bella, how difficult this was for him. There was no need to beat a dead horse about their family home. With any luck, they would be back to Thetford in a year.

As he removed his wet clothes and dressed behind a rock, Edward idly scanned his sister's thoughts, catching up on the few hours they were apart. He noticed almost immediately that she seemed to be directing her thoughts. Alice only did that when she was trying to hide something from him.

"Alice," he rumbled, after carelessly buttoning his jeans. He stepped out from behind the rock, his sweater in his hands and his feet still bare. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," she replied, averting her eyes. _At least let us get to the house before you start in on me_.

"I'll do no such thing," he said, ducking into his sweater. "What're you hiding from me?"

Bella stepped out from behind her rock, the sweater Alice had chosen for her just a touch too form fitting for Bella's taste. Her eyes were locked on Edward's, and she stood immortally still, not a muscle moving. She could feel the tension in the air between the siblings.

"Ye can hide tha shit from him?" Maggie burst out, lightening the tense mood if only minutely. "Ye mean he canna see tha ye've seen th' Volturi?"

The breath left Edward's lungs in a whoosh of silent rage. "Where are they?" he asked, his voice low and deadly. "When will they be here?"

Alice was in his face, her hands feather soft on his shoulders as she tried to impede his progress up the beach.

"That's just it, they're not coming here." Alice's golden eyes were wide as she looked up at him. Edward froze, waiting for her to tell him more. She opened her mind to him, and he could see everything.

_Aro knows about Bella. He guessed that you were going to change her, but he thinks that maybe you're trying to raise an army against him. He doesn't know that you're in love with her. How could a being like Aro guess at something like love? Anyway, he's going to be watching us more carefully now. It's good we left Thetford without a trace; it'll be more difficult for him to find us_.

"Good and bad. He'll know pretty quickly that we're not there," Edward said. "We need to warn our friends."

"Why?" Maggie asked at the same time as Bella asked, "Who?"

"We have a great many friends—friends left over from when we had a family. They'll be the first people that Aro goes after in his hunt to find us."

Both women nodded, having received sufficient answers to their questions.

"Come on," Edward said with a sigh. "Let's get back to the house so we can start contacting them."

Alice's eyes glazed over, and Edward felt a chill of fear surround his heart. What would she see this time?

"They're going to want to come," she whispered. "So, so many will want to come and stand with us. Edward, you may not have set out to raise an army ... but you're about to nonetheless."

Alice's proclamation hung in the air around them as the four vampires stood in the early morning light. There wasn't more that he could do about it. He owed his friends a call to warn them; whether they chose to come and stand against the Volturi with him or not was their choice. Perhaps this was the way it was always supposed to be. He didn't want a war, but he knew that Aro's reign of terror would never end unless someone toppled him. If so many would want to join them, maybe this battle was far greater than the loss of his family after all.

* * *

**_A/N:_**_ I'm not going to bore you with apologies. I know it's been a long time; you do as well. If you're still here and reading I am more grateful to you than you can know. I promised that I wouldn't leave my stories unfinished and I won't. My goal is to hit complete on this story before Christmas (yes ... of this year). If you want to wait until it's complete, I totally understand. My stories aren't going anywhere, so you're safe to do that. If you don't mind variable update times, stick with me. ;) _

_Hope you enjoyed this update. I admit that I have never scuba dived. I pretty much would prefer to never be that far under water. But, were I a vampire ... I might be more inclined. I think if I could, I'd love to see the caves that Edward took Bella to. I think it would be beautiful and magical, especially with a guide like Edward. As you can expect, things are going to take off from here on out plot wise. This was planned as a 30 chapter fic. Depending on the length of those chapters, I'd say it should be right around that number, give or take a couple. :) Thanks so much for reading, guys. ILY and I hope you continue to love this Edward and Bella. :) ~Jen_


	26. Hunting in Scotland

_Oh I am growing tired_

_Of allowing you to steal_

_Everything I have_

_You're making me feel_

_Like I was born to service you_

_But I am growing by the hour_

_You left us far behind_

_So we all discard our souls_

_And blaze through your skies_

_So unafraid to die_

'_Cause I was born to destroy you_

_And I am growing by the hour_

_And I'm getting strong in every way_

_**Hate This and I'll Love You**__, Muse 1999_

_**Disclaimer**__: Don't own _Twilight _or its characters_._ I do, however, own a few characters of my own creation. More about them after the chapter in my AN. ;)_

_Many, many thanks, as always, to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs. They are the best team a girl could ask for, and I'm lucky that they put up with me—and that you do as well. *kisses*_

* * *

Bella walked around the old, stone house amazed with the sheer number of immortals who had convened in such a short a time. The five from Denali were the first to arrive. The three stunningly beautiful sisters were had many strange ways, or at least it seemed so to Bella. She knew that Tanya, Kate, and Irina were ancient, even from an immortal standpoint, and they had been together since they were all created. The bond they shared was both powerful and palpable. When the three sisters were in a room together, it didn't take Edward's mind reading ability to know that a conversation was being held silently.

The bonded pair that traveled with them, Eleazar and Carmen, was particularly close with Edward. Bella had to smile when she saw Edward walk over and receive a hug from the smaller, dark-hued immortals. Their light accents and soft tones endeared them to her as well. Of course, the five members of Tanya's clan were the easiest to be around because they shared Edward's unique diet.

"Are you all right?" Tanya's gentle voice preceded a soft touch on Bella's shoulder.

Naturally, Bella had heard the vampire approaching, but she'd grown so used to movement around the old house that she was still startled when someone spoke to her. She'd been observing the bustle from a quiet corner, thinking that she would be unnoticed. It took a lot of effort not to throw her shield around herself when Tanya startled her.

"I – yes. I'm just trying to take it all in," she replied, turning toward Tanya. "Are you well?"

Tanya smiled, nodding her head slowly. Her strawberry blond hair that hung in wild tangles around her face fell over one eye, and she brushed it back in a lightning fast movement. "I will have to tie it back if it comes to a fight."

Bella would have shuddered had she still been human. The reflex seemed to reverse itself now that she was immortal; instead of shuddering in fear, she froze—neither breathing nor blinking—as she considered for perhaps the millionth time the possibility of a fight.

"Would you walk with me, Bella? I think, perhaps, I should hunt, and I would like your company."

Bella blinked as her hand found its way to her throat. She was thirsty, and she found herself drawn to the ancient vampire. She'd like to know more about her long life and why she had brought her family so quickly to help Edward and Alice. Bella nodded, smiling shyly.

"Thanks. Newborn thirst," she said with a chuckle.

"I remember," Tanya replied, shocking Bella yet again.

"Everything okay, love?" Edward asked, slipping his arms around her waist. It still amazed her how calm his very presence could make her.

Bella sighed and leaned back into his arms. Tanya nodded and slipped away, murmuring that she would meet Bella by the door.

"I'm going to go hunting with Tanya," she said.

Edward stiffened, making Bella turn quickly in his arms. "Without me?" he asked.

Bella smiled and touched the side of his face. "You're busy with new arrivals. Besides, Tanya follows our diet … it seems like a perfect situation."

"I don't like you being separated from me," he admitted, pulling her closer and kissing her forehead.

"I love you for that," Bella said, pushing gently on his chest. "But I'm fine. I need to hunt anyway."

Edward chuckled. "Of course you do."

Bella cuffed him on the arm playfully, but he caught her wrist and turned her swiftly. He led her back into a dark hallway, pinning her against the wall and capturing her mouth with his. His kiss was hard and needy, his tongue stroking hers until she was breathless with her hands in his hair.

"What was that for?" she asked.

"To ensure you come back quickly," he murmured, kissing down the column of her neck and nipping her shoulder.

Bella gasped. "Effective," she growled, shaking her head to clear it.

Edward walked with her to the door to meet Tanya.

"You'll take care of her," Edward said, his arm drawn protectively around Bella's waist.

Tanya regarded him silently before nodding and stepping out the door.

"Thank you, Tanya," Edward whispered sincerely.

"What did she say to you?" Bella asked, turning toward him with her eyebrows drawn together.

"She said that she would protect you as though you were her own sister. I could not ask for greater protection for you than that."

Edward kissed her once on the forehead and then turned to go back in the house.

_I love you_, she said in her head, taking her shield down to ensure Edward heard.

"I know," he murmured, not turning around.

Even without seeing his face, Bella could hear the smile in his voice. She nodded and turned around to face Tanya.

"Ready?" she asked.

Tanya smiled, wider and more playfully than Bella had seen her since they'd arrived two days prior. "Care to catch me?" she asked.

Bella blinked rapidly, surprised. "You – know about me, don't you? My somewhat unique gift?"

Tanya shrugged. "I do not plan on losing your, dear. And I am certain that we won't run into humans where I plan to go. Just – do not disappear on me."

"It isn't that simple," Bella explained.

"But of course it is," the older vampire said patiently. "It is part of you and as such you must gain control of it, just like any other immortal power. Do not let it control you."

Bella was still for a moment or two as she considered Tanya's words. In response, Bella crouched low and smirked. "Ready," she said.

Tanya shot through the clearing and into the woods, blurring through the old trees with Bella close behind her. They ran, unfocused in the beginning. Within a mile, they had both picked up on the faint, tinny aroma of a recent kill. There was blood in the air which meant predators were nearby. Both females ran toward the smell.

In a clearing, they found the remains of a red deer taken down savagely by a fierce predator. Tanya crouched low to the ground, sniffing the air. Bella could smell that the kill was fresh, no more than twenty minutes old. She turned her head in the direction the scent traveled. Tanya was already looking that way. The wet, hot pulse of several beating hearts were not far away. They were hidden in the forest only a few feet from Bella and Tanya, frightened by the scent of a greater predator.

Tanya got there first, surprising the group of four badgers out of their hiding place and snatching one as it tried to run away. Bella lunged at the largest male who turned to bare his teeth in self-defense. Once cornered, the male attacked Bella, his nails screeching against her as he hissed and snarled to ward off the predator. They found no purchase on her granite skin as she grabbed his body and brought his throat to her mouth. Within seconds, the animal was still and silent. She looked up to see Tanya watching her carefully

"Seems a pity to kill such a brave little thing," Bella murmured as she wiped the blood from her lips and set the carcass down.

Tanya shrugged. "It is far better than killing even the weakest human," she replied. "That was little more than a snack for you, I'm sure."

"I didn't need much," Bella assured her. "Tanya, may I ask you something?"

"Anything," Tanya said with a smile. "Edward told me you were full of curiosity."

Bella laughed, and nodded. "I think my curiosity at once annoys and enamors him to me."

"Do not underestimate yourself," the older vampire replied. "There is nothing about you that annoys your mate."

Bella noted that Tanya's voice sounded sad and her eyes were downcast. She cocked her head to the side, trying to read what had caused this change but Tanya was as unreadable as she was beautiful. As they buried their kills, Bella began to ask her questions.

"How long have you been a 'vegetarian' vampire?" Bella asked.

"Since 1164," Tanya replied without hesitation.

"So … right after you were turned then?"

Tanya chuckled and shook her head. "No, child. I was a traditional vampire for 656 years before my sisters and I discovered this way of life. Though we were always searching …"

Despite the immortal capabilities of her mind, Bella was still stunned into silence at the sheer magnitude of Tanya's age. The being in front of her was 1503 years old. Wars and famines, changes in topography … Tanya had been witness to them all.

"I don't mean to stare," Bella said, embarrassed. "I was just thinking about the vast amount of history you've seen. It's astonishing to me."

"Yes … I am astonishingly elderly," Tanya said, chuckling. "For someone such as yourself, to whom history is so important, it may sound odd to hear that I don't think about that facet of my life as much as you might think. My world, and what is important to me, is my family. The human realm is something different all together."

"You don't like humans?" Bella asked.

The two began walking through the forest at a leisurely pace, enjoying the early afternoon quiet of the Highlands.

"On the contrary, I find them fascinating. I just don't put much emphasis on their important events."

"I can see that," Bella said thoughtfully. "Even now, I find myself feeling distanced from humanity. I still remember _being _human, at least a little, but I'm so different now than they are."

"Imagine fifteen hundred years separation from your humanity."

"I cannot even fathom it, Tanya," Bella replied, turning to face the other woman. "What made you choose this diet?"

"My fascination with humans," she answered with a smile. "You see, my sisters and I seek company with … humans from time to time. It was painful to kill the very beings we sought solace with. We would push ourselves beyond our hunger for longer and longer stretches of time, trying to stave off the inevitable need to feed. We made our home in a desolate area, and I had let myself go too far, too long. I was desperately thirsty. I came upon a wounded polar bear. My sisters and I had met Carlisle Cullen and knew of his odd diet. So, nearly crazed with thirst, I savaged the bear. Surprisingly, the blood slaked my thirst, and I began to experiment. When I realized that animal blood could sustain me, my sisters and I never swayed from the diet again."

"That's incredible," Bella murmured. "Edward told me that Carlisle was the first to use the diet."

"Carlisle is greater than any of us; he never once faltered from his course, even as a newborn."

"He woke up … vegetarian?"

"He woke up knowing that he was not a monster. The choice to feed from animals came after days of painful starvation as he denied himself the human blood he craved."

Bella stared at Tanya, her red eyes unblinking, as her immortal mind processed the information. Immediately, the fragrant bouquet of human blood came to her mind and her throat burned with the vivid memory. Even as only a memory, she felt the pull to seek it out and feel it coursing over her tongue to slake the burn. Carlisle would have awoken surrounded by the rich smell of blood, tempted at every step he took, and yet he found a way to resist. Again, she gained respect for the vampire she had never met. His strength was an inspiration to her, and it reminded her of what Tanya had told her earlier about her own gift.

"Tanya, you said earlier that I needed to hone my gift — control it so that it did not control me. I think that it only needs practice in order for me to master it. Would you practice with me?"

Tanya smiled and touched her arm. "I am flattered that you think me so strong as to be able to train you, Bella, but I am neither a skilled fighter nor well-versed in the ways of gifts. My sister, Kate, and one of the newer arrivals, Zafrina, would be better suited to help you."

Bella couldn't help but feel the tiniest bit of disappointment. Tanya was the first vampire, aside from Edward, Alice, and Maggie, who had reached out to her. She felt comfortable with Tanya and wanted to deepen that companionship. On top of that, some things about Bella's personality hadn't changed since becoming immortal. It had taken a lot for her to admit there was an aspect of her immortality which she needed help with; she didn't want to have to ask another vampire.

"I worry that I'm going to be a liability when the time comes for a fight," Bella admitted. "I'm already 'the newborn' to everyone who talks about me; I want to be able to contribute this gift that everyone seems to think is so powerful."

"I have no doubt that you will do so," Tanya said, encouragingly. "Perhaps we should head back to the house, and I'll introduce you to Kate and Zafrina. It will take some persuading to get Edward to let you out of his sight, but I think you would agree that he would not be useful in your training."

Bella chuckled and shook her head. "He would like nothing better than to see me in bubble wrap and put up on a shelf during the fight. He won't even talk about the possibility with me."

"It's only natural," Tanya said soothingly. "He's only just found you after so long. To put you in harm's way is utterly unacceptable to him. I cannot blame him for that."

Bella reluctantly agreed with Tanya. She had secretly hoped that her transformation would help Edward see her as both less destructible and closer to his equal. She knew that was unfair; Edward _did _consider her his equal. If she was being fair and rational, she didn't like to think of him in the thick of a fight either. Tanya and Bella headed back to the house in search of the other women. Bella would deal with Edward if and when his questions came.

* * *

The sun was setting as they arrived back at the house, and Tanya went immediately to find her sister and Zafrina. Bella had only seen the statuesque Amazonian vampire in passing, but had been struck immediately by her form. Her caramel skin was shocking to behold, a creamy mix of dark and light hues. Her hair hung in perfect, black braids woven through with brightly colored ribbons. The rich hues caught the eye as Zafrina passed.

As Bella waited for Tanya to come back, she saw Edward's form coming toward her, his mouth a thin line. He'd read in Tanya's mind what her plans were, and Bella guessed that he was coming to dissuade her. To her surprise, she guessed wrong.

"Before you start …" she said, holding up her hand.

Edward caught her fingers with his own and smirked at her. "Start what?"

"You had to have heard Tanya," she replied, her brows knitting together in confusion.

"I did," he murmured, pulling her gently toward him. "I think it's a wise decision."

She showed little resistance as he folded her in his arms, but her mind was still trying to wrap around how effortlessly he accepted the decision. Deep down, she felt certain that it couldn't be that simple and she let him know by dropping her shield.

"I can't teach you to fight," he whispered, his voice hoarse with emotion. "I can't picture you as prey and attack you the way a sparring partner needs to. Tanya couldn't have picked better teachers for you."

"You're not angry?" Bella asked, aware of the irony of her question. She'd been indignant that he was underestimating her, and here she was asking for his approval.

"Of course not. I _want_ you to be prepared. I just don't want to have to _think_ of the inevitability of you fighting. Does that make sense?"

"Yes," she said, brushing her nose against his chest. "I feel the same way about you. I know you'll fight, and I know you're far more prepared than I am, but I don't want to think of you in danger."

"Maybe it won't come to a fight," Edward said lightly, his finger swirling in circles at the base of her spine.

She chuckled harshly. "You know it will, and so does everyone else who came here. If nothing else, Aro will have _another_ reason to want you when he meets me." Edward growled, but Bella placed her palm over his chest, stilling him. "It's a fact, and we both know it. My shield is too powerful for him not to want me in his little menagerie. No sense in denying it. Neither one of us is going to allow it – nor will our friends – so there will be a fight."

Edward sighed. "They're coming. Do be careful, love. I wouldn't want to have to fight with Kate."

"What's the matter, Edward? Worried that I might _shock_ you?" Kate's blonde head popped up from behind Edward's shoulder, and she winked at Bella. "I hear we're going to spar. I've been itching for some action since we got here."

Edward couldn't seem to help himself; the growl built in his chest, and Bella felt it growing in power under her fingertips.

"All right," she said, pointing a single finger at the center of his chest. "Go. I'll be fine, and I will be _back_ before the dawn."

"You better be," Edward mumbled, bringing his lips to her ear. "I'll be waiting."

Bella shivered in spite of herself as his ran his thumb over the delicate scar on her neck, marking her with his touch. Yes, he would be waiting. Bella was sure of that. And from the sound of his voice, he had his own ideas in mind for distracting them both from thoughts about the coming fight. Bella certainly didn't object to that.

Kate, Zafrina, and Tanya took Bella to a wide, bowl-shaped clearing about twenty miles from the house. White rocks covered in browning pieces of moss stuck out jaggedly from the sides. It was a unique place. Kate, ever the daredevil, found a steep slope and slid down it, holding her hands out to the side as though she were surfing on the rock. The image would have been almost human had she not flipped into the air and karate chopped a massive branch from one of the trees, knocking it to the ground. She grinned up at the others, waving at them to follow her.

"I'm glad you came," Bella said to Tanya as they started down the incline.

"I promised your mate that I would protect you as though you were my own sister," she replied. "It is not a promise I made lightly, nor is it something I can do remotely. I'm still not going to participate."

Tanya perched herself on a small outcropping of rock, her legs folded delicately beneath her. Her vantage point allowed her to see the entire, round area without turning her head very far. Bella continued on down into the ravine where Kate and the silent Zafrina waited for her. The Amazonian vampire unnerved Bella, far more than any of the other immortals who had arrived over the past three days. She and her two sisters, Kachiri and Senna, spent most of their time standing in a corner, conversing without words. Their connection stronger than the Denalis – stranger as well. The three Amazonian vampires exuded both physical strength and raw talent, but they also possessed gifts that troubled many who knew of them. Eleazar, for one, was uneasy around Zafrina because he knew exactly how powerful her gift was.

Bella found Zafrina to be an odd choice for a tutor, especially since neither Kate nor Tanya seemed particularly comfortable around the strange vampire. They respected her, but it was deferential — not welcoming. Bella couldn't help but wonder if Zafrina resented being asked to train the newborn, or even whether she wanted to be in Scotland in the first place. Her stoic silence made Bella assume the worst, even though it was impossible to determine Zafrina's motives.

"First, we need to know if our gifts work on you," Kate said, a twinkle in her eyes. "I'll go first."

Bella crouched defensively as Kate neared her. She knew what Kate was capable of, had seen her shock her sisters on occasion. She didn't want to be on the receiving end of such a gift. Lightening quick, Kate snaked out her hand and grabbed Bella's wrist. She snarled, twisted her hand out of Kate's grasp, and grabbed hold of Kate's forearm with her other hand.

"Very good," Kate said. "I'm guessing you didn't feel that?"

"You shocked me?" Bella asked, her breath still coming raggedly.

Kate nodded, murmuring yes. "If Edward can't get into your head, chances are Z isn't going to get anywhere, but we might as well give it a go."

Zafrina's lip curled upward at the casual nickname Kate used. It shocked Bella how much _younger_ Kate seemed than Tanya. Even her speech was more modern than her sister's.

That would be a question for later. Zafrina stepped forward, and Bella straightened her shoulders. Zafrina's talents were difficult to describe; the only thing Bella was certain of was that Zafrina could make a person see anything she wanted them to see. She'd overheard a story about how Zafrina had made another vampire go mad before she killed him, all because he'd mistreated one of her sisters. The vampire, Joham, sounded awful and it seemed like he deserved his fate, but the story was frightening all the same.

Zafrina's eyes narrowed in concentration, a dark line appearing in the caramel skin between her eyes. Bella knew that the other vampire must be trying to make her see something that wasn't there, but nothing had changed. She looked around, and they were still in the great basin with the white rocks and decaying moss. Zafrina gave a grunt of disappointment before her burgundy eyes flitted away from Bella.

"Her shield is too strong," she murmured in her thick, lilting accent.

"Now to test you," Kate said with a smirk.

Bella was impressed with the way she was able to deflect the one on one attacks. It was so much easier to see movement now that she was an immortal; she could see every part of someone's movement, analyze it, and adjust for it with ease. As time progressed and Bella became more comfortable with her defensive moves, they began coordinating against her. Throughout the sparring match, Bella used her gift to her advantage, seeing how she was able to disappear and reappear at key moments in the battle.

"Ha!" Bella exclaimed, reappearing as she landed behind Kate with her hand on the older vampire's chin and her teeth inches from Kate's throat.

"Very, very good, Bella," Kate exclaimed as Bella released her.

"I want to know more of your shield," Zafrina said, eyeing Bella steadily.

The Amazonian cocked her head to the side, blood-red eyes boring into Bella as she considered. Bella felt a sense of unease growing within her, not that she would be personally threatened, but that she would be tested beyond anything she had ever experienced before. She expected questions about her gift, about how she was able to disappear and reappear — questions that Bella didn't have answers for. Without any warning, Zafrina turned her eyes up to where Tanya was sitting. Despite the darkness, Bella could see the disorientation on Tanya's face immediately. She didn't move, but she looked around and Bella was certain that she was no longer seeing the ravine.

"What are you doing?" Bella asked.

"I — no. It cannot be." Tanya's voice was small and shaky and _frightened_.

Kate, who was standing closer to Zafrina than Bella, growled lowly in warning, but Zafrina ignored her. Bella crouched, waiting to see what Tanya would do next.

"No … it has been centuries. How could you — _why_ do you — Mother?"

Kate let out a murderous scream and launched herself at Zafrina. Kate looked as though she would make it, that she would be able to get her hands on the Amazonian vampire to make her stop whatever she was doing to Tanya, but before she could, Zafrina held up her hand, and Kate froze in mid run. Her golden eyes went glassy as she looked around herself, confused. Bella didn't know if she was seeing the same vision as Tanya or if it was different.

Tanya's face, so far above them, broke Bella's dead heart. If a vampire could cry, Bella imagined this is what it would look like. She sat, stretching out her hand to something just out of her reach. The pain on her face was palpable, and Bella wanted to stop it. She raced up the hill, and she thought she heard Zafrina murmur "yes."

Bella threw her arms around Tanya and willed her shield around both of them. She grunted with the effort of pulling it around another body, but she knew when she had been successful. Tanya gasped and looked at her with wide, bewildered eyes. Almost immediately, Bella heard a loud crash below them and Kate's snarling voice asking what Zafrina had done with Bella and Tanya.

"But they are there," Zafrina said calmly. "Bella, it is over. Show yourself."

Tanya had clearly recovered from the shock of seeing whatever Zafrina had showed her. "It's okay, my friend. Pull back your shield."

Bella sighed in satisfaction when she allowed the shield to snap back into place. Kate leapt off of Zafrina and stared in a mixture of horror and wonder at Bella and Tanya. For the first time, Bella saw the stoic, Amazonian vampire smiling.

"That was very, very good, little one," she murmured. "Now you see that there may be no limits to what your shield can do."

And in an instant, Bella realized the magnitude of what Zafrina had taught her. Not only could her shield protect her, but it could protect another as well.

It could also conceal another.

And an idea began to form.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Hi! Those of you who follow me on Twitter know where I've been for the past 6 weeks. For those of you who don't, let me briefly fill you in. I decided at the last minute to participate in NaNoWriMo, or National Novel Writer's Month. Basically, you are challenged to write 50,000 words in one month (November). I wasn't going to participate, but about a week and half before it kicked off, I got a killer idea for a novel and thought … why not? Anyway, I did it. I wrote __**more**__ than 50K in November and decided to keep up with my momentum to try and finish my novel. I'm happy to report that, in the space of 6 weeks, I finished an 80K first draft of my first novel. I'm not done by any means – there is still loads of editing to do – but I have a first draft to work with and that, to me, is such a blessing. It was a hard choice to focus solely on original work, knowing I was leaving you all waiting, but all of you who contacted me via PM or Twitter were so very supportive. I can't tell you all how much I appreciate that. I'm taking about three to four weeks break from my original manuscript before going back for edits. In that time, I hope to finish up TFP and get my next fic starting to post. Those of you who donated to Fandom for Texas will have a head start on that fic. It's an All Human story titled Butterflies are Free to Fly. It won't start posting until it is complete, so even when I get back to edits, you won't have to wait for chapters._

_Sorry for the long A/N. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. See you in about a week and a half for the next! ~Jen_


	27. The Plan is Afoot

_Interchanging mind control,_

_Come let the revolution take its toll,_

_If you could flick a switch and open your third eye,_

_You'd see that_

_We should never be afraid to die_

_(So come on)_

_Rise up and take the power back,_

_It's time the fat cats had a heart attack_

_You know that their time's coming to an end,_

_We have to unify and watch our flag ascend._

_**Muse**__, Uprising, 2009_

_**Disclaimer:**__ Still don't own _Twilight_. Dang it all._

_Many thanks to DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and SparklyBabs for their beta reading prowess. Thanks, also, to all of you. A note about this chapter: the Volterra that I describe in this chapter is __**not**__ the Volterra of canon. I picture it almost like a fortified Vatican, walled off from the rest of the countryside. Volterra vampires can get in and out to hunt, but no humans or unwanted vampires can just wander in. Hope that helps with imagining the place they will be talking about in this chapter._

* * *

"Alice is acting odd," Eleazar said, flipping through the current newspaper at a high rate of speed.

"Alice has a lot on her plate," Edward responded idly. "Do you see anything?"

Eleazar had been reading through several newspapers, trying to determine if there were any signs that the Volturi had gone rogue.

"No," the older vampire replied. "I didn't think I would. Aro might be annoyed and be searching for us, but he wouldn't go on a rampage."

"It was worth a shot," Edward said, looking around the room.

The small Scottish house was cramped with vampires from all over the world. Over thirty of them had gathered in the space of a week. Even in his wildest imaginings, he couldn't have guessed that so many would come to see Aro unseated. Lost in the pain of his family's disappearance, he had overlooked how much the rest of the vampire world had been affected by Aro's unscrupulous behavior. They all looked to him to devise a plan and none of them seemed to doubt that he would know the way.

Outwardly, Edward appeared as calm as anyone would expect. Inwardly, however, too many things seemed to be going wrong in recent days. Though he tried not to think of it, he believed that his mate and his sister were hiding something from him. He knew, of course, that Bella was splitting most of her time between the journals and papers and training to fight. Among the other immortals, her shield had become something of a sport. In order to keep themselves occupied during the monotonous days and nights, they would challenge Bella to see how many vampires she could hide within her protective bubble. Her "disappearance" record was five. She had also gotten rather good at throwing her mental shield around others. It was far more flexible than the physical barrier, and they'd discovered that she could deflect Edward's ability on as many vampires as she chose.

Despite the sport of it all, Bella had been acting differently around him. He noticed it most when they made love. He'd catch her looking out in the distance as though weighed down by something too great to imagine. Edward would work to bring her back to him, and she always did, but it was not the same. He knew that there was something troubling her that she could not share with him, and he didn't wish to press her on it. He didn't even want to think on it. But it was difficult and her unknown worries weighed on his mind.

Because of his gift, everyone else's worries troubled him as well. Eleazar, like Edward, was concerned about both their numbers and their abilities. It was not that the immortals gathered in Scotland were lacking in gifts; on the contrary there were many talented vampires who had flocked to their side. Rather, Eleazar knew first-hand how specialized Aro's forces were. To go up against a fleet of vampires who had been hand-picked for their gifts and trained to attack in unison was near suicide, even for the most gifted among them.

"You're doing it again," Eleazar murmured.

"Hmm?" Edward asked, snapping out of his own thoughts.

"You're drifting, Edward. It's undignified for a vampire."

Edward smirked at Eleazar's teasing and shook his head. "I'm trying to weigh all the possibilities. There are so many, even for an immortal mind to fathom. I just don't know that staying here is in our best interest."

_You think we should attack?_ Eleazar's voice spoke to him in his mind.

Edward looked him in the eye, reading his thoughts on the issue. Volterra was strong—a walled city within a city that Aro had turned into a haven for his hand-picked guard. There, vampires could walk out in the daylight without fear of discovery. No humans ever came in who were destined to leave. To attack that walled labyrinth of security would require a coordinated strike with the kind of numbers they just didn't possess.

"We know they are looking for us," Edward insisted. "Alice has seen Aro send spies around the globe searching for us. When he learned that your Denali home was deserted, he immediately assumed we were amassing _somewhere_ to form an army. Why should we wait for him to come to us?"

"Why should we go looking for our deaths?" Eleazar asked softly.

"Oh, come now. It's not all doom and gloom, is it?" The voice of Garrett, a young nomad vampire from the States, surprised Eleazar. Edward had heard him listening in on their conversation but with the tight quarters, he didn't see any way around others overhearing. "We didn't come here to lie down and die, Eleazar," Garrett continued. "At least, I didn't."

"You're too young to know the way of the Volturi," Eleazar said quietly as Garrett sidled up to the table where they sat. "They are more powerful than any coven you have ever encountered."

"Don't underestimate him, Eleazar," Edward murmured. "Garrett has a past with the Volturi, don't you?"

Garrett nodded, a twinkle in his eye. "That I do. Wasn't more than ten years after I was turned that I found myself jaunting around Europe. I got bored with life in the States and was looking for a new scene … maybe a coven to spend a few months with. I wandered too close to Volterra and saw something I shouldn't have."

Eleazar's eyes widened. "What did you see?"

"They go fishing for their kills. Did you know that? They send out the prettiest vampires all dolled up in the latest human fashions. I was hanging outside the walls and saw this vampire come strolling out of the gate wearing red leather go-go boots and a white mini skirt. I waited by the gate, hoping she'd come back the same way when I saw her coming with a group of about forty humans following her. I kept my head down and followed after her, wanting to know where she was taking them. She led them through these huge stone walls, told them they were going to see a section of Italy that no one had ever written about. Once we were through the doors – bam! The gates closed and dozens of vampires swooped down on the tourists.

"A big guy – I mean _huge_ – grabbed me around the neck and held me until the group of humans were all drained. After they were done, this pale white vampire I now know is Aro stepped forward and snatched my hand. It was the most disgusting feeling as he crawled through my memories – nothing like when you read my mind, Edward. He saw that I was without a coven and looking for a place; he also saw that I was talentless. He put on a display with his pets, showed me how powerful he was, and then made a big deal of asking if I wanted a place in his little realm."

Garrett was quiet, looking back and forth between Edward and Eleazar. The older vampire leaned forward, eager to hear what came next. Garrett shuddered and closed his eyes.

"I didn't want to be part of any circus show, and I told him that. He had the big guy give me a little parting gift before tossing me over the gates."

Garrett pulled up his sleeve to show where a large chunk of skin had been ripped from his upper arm. The skin had tried to heal, but left a misshapen indentation in his arm where the flesh had been torn.

"You see, he knows what they can do," Edward said. "So many of these vampires have similar stories – run-ins with Aro that left them scarred or bereft of mates – they know what they are up against."

_We should talk privately,_ Eleazar said, nodding his head to include Garrett in his "we." Edward agreed and suggested that the three of them go for a hunt. Garrett, ever the adventurer, said he was interested to see how the vegetarians hunted. He agreed readily to accompanying them.

"Just allow me to find Bella before we go," Edward said, scanning the crowded ground floor in search of her.

"I saw her in the library," Garrett offered.

Edward was gone before he finished speaking.

Bella was hunched over three of the journals, her red eyes darting from text to text as she compared and contrasted writing samples. It hadn't ceased to amaze him how beautiful she was as she worked. He stood in the doorway for a moment, giving himself the chance to watch her in peace before he disturbed her.

"I know you're there," she whispered without looking up.

He flashed over and behind her in an instant, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his nose in her hair. He felt her head incline toward him, felt the gentle lift of her cheek as she smiled at his touch. Edward breathed a sigh of relief as she covered his hand with hers. Any time away from her pained him and the impending battle did nothing to soothe that ache.

"Have you found anything?" he asked, running his lips up the column of her neck and drinking in her scent.

She shivered, leaning back against him, and snuggled into his embrace. She nodded her head slowly before replying.

"As I told you before, I'm quite certain all of these journals were written by Carlisle after he was taken. Still no idea how they got out of his possession, but I can tell you that the style of writing is different."

"How so?"

"He seems … confused on several occasions. He'll begin thoughts and then trail off into nonsense before coming back to a different point. It's disturbing."

Edward's still heart fell at her words. It was one of his greatest fears. Carlisle's mind was like few other immortals; his knowledge as a physician was unparalleled. To think that whatever power had taken his memory might have interfered with his reasoning pained Edward greatly.

Bella turned in his arms and looked up at him. She knew of his worry because they'd spoken of it. She framed his face in her hands and shook her head. "This doesn't mean that he's gone crazy. There are lots of reasons for this kind of writing. Maybe it's not nonsense – maybe it's some kind of code that I'm missing right now. Edward, we'll figure this out somehow. Please, just don't give up hope or go off the deep end."

He chuckled. "Me?"

Bella smiled warmly at him. "Did you come in for a reason, or just to distract me for a few minutes?"

"That isn't a good enough reason?"

He covered her mouth gently, pulling her bottom lip between his teeth and biting softly until she opened her lips and wrapped her arms around his neck. They kissed, the documents and Aro forgotten for several moments before Edward pulled away.

"I'm going to hunt with Eleazar and Garrett," he said, brushing his nose against her forehead.

"I wondered when he'd ask to go on a vegetarian hunt," Bella said, a smile in her voice.

"What? Why?" She'd taken him off guard again, like she was so prone to do.

"Haven't you noticed the way he looks at Kate? And she at him? I think they like each other quite a lot. But she's vegetarian, and he's traditional – it only makes sense that he'd want to try it out to see if it could work."

"Ah," Edward said, shaking his head. "I – hadn't noticed."

"Of course not," she said, winking at him.

"No, truly," he said. "I hadn't heard anything in either of their minds…"

"Edward, how many thoughts are you listening for right now? I'm not surprised you're missing out on some minor relationship drama. Go hunt with the boys. I have a little more to do here and then Alice, Maggie and I are going to go practice again."

Edward sighed and nodded. "Be safe, my love."

"Always."

He kissed her forehead and turned to walk away. It surprised him when Bella raced in front of him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling his face closer to hers. Her kiss was frantic – passionate but almost violent at the same time. It seemed she was trying to force all of the emotion that she could into her kiss.

When they broke apart, Edward searched her red eyes looking for some indication about why she had kissed him so fervently. He expected her to lower her shield and explain calmly how the battle had affected her perception of things. She didn't. She _hadn't_ in over three days. He was beginning to miss her thoughts greatly.

"You be safe, too," she murmured, and turned quickly back to the documents.

Edward stood stunned for a moment, watching her walk away from him. He shook his head and walked out of the room, still somewhat dazed from Bella's ferocious kiss.

* * *

Eleazar and Edward took Garrett out some distance from the house where they'd observed a large mob of female deer grazing not long ago. Along the way, Edward pulled thoughts from the two vampire's brains, gauging how each of them felt about the coming confrontation.

Garrett, unsurprisingly, was up for anything. Edward had only met Garrett two or three times before this. He was full of a zest for vampiric life, living dangerously. It was his curiosity that had gotten him into the situation in Volterra. Edward, though enamored of the young vampire, often wondered how he had not managed to get himself killed before now.

It was not surprising, then, that Garrett wished to face the threat head on – on his own terms and not those laid down by Aro. Edward couldn't blame him. He himself wished to name his own terms in a battle for many reasons, not the least of which being that he despised waiting on the inevitable.

They knew that a battle was coming. When Aro discovered the sheer number of vampires who had gathered to support Edward, he wouldn't leave without making an example out of them. No matter how much Aro wished to have Edward, he wouldn't let insubordination like this go unpunished. Edward didn't want to wait for his reprimand. He wanted to go and possibly surprise the old vampire who thought he knew everything and could control all avenues of his life.

But Eleazar's calm voice gave Edward pause. Eleazar had spent centuries with the Volturi and left on good terms after meeting his mate, Carmen. He knew the ins and outs of Aro's realm, possibly knew the old vampire better than anyone not inside Volterra. Eleazar had good reason to fear the city of Volterra; it was impenetrable – _had_ been impenetrable for centuries. The last coven who had tried to break through its walls had found themselves in Aro's fabled fire pit before they even knew what was happening. That coven, an East Asian coven, had been full of trained fighters. The same could not be said for Edward's ragamuffin band of vampires who simply shared a common hatred for Aro's tactics.

The trio came to a stop at the peak of a hill overlooking a low meadow. Below, thirteen red deer were spread out, grazing away the last of part of the day. Edward and Eleazar crouched low to the ground, but Garrett stepped up to the edge of the hill and surveyed the land below. He took a deep breath in and wrinkled his nose.

"How do you get past the stench?" he asked.

"It's blood," Eleazar said evenly. "It may not smell like what you are used to, but it does the job. And there will be no human death on your hands after you feed."

Garrett didn't necessarily have a problem with killing humans – he considered it a necessary part of feeding – but he was willing to try it if for no other reason than to be closer to Kate. Again, Edward wondered how he could have missed Garrett's feelings; now that he was looking for them, they seemed rather overwhelming. It seemed his sister wasn't the only one who was spread thin at the moment.

"On three?" Garrett asked, turning his head around to look at Edward and Eleazar.

Eleazar smirked as he thought about dashing past the young vampire. Edward nodded quickly and they both took off around Garrett, leaving him standing at the mouth of the meadow for only a moment before he ran after them.

They each drank their fill and Edward watched Garrett finish his hunt. If he was uncertain about the kill, he didn't seem so as he attacked his prey and drank from it. After feeding, the three vampires took the deer and buried them deep within the woods and came out to sit for a while in the high grass of the meadow.

"It wasn't as foul as I would have imagined," Garrett said, plucking three blades of grass and braiding them together idly.

"No, and it gets easier each time," Eleazar replied, leaning back. "Have you told Katie how you feel about her?"

Garrett smiled, and cocked his head to the side, taking Eleazar's probing question in stride. "Only every time I see her. She feels the same, I'm sure, but she's playing coy for her sisters' sake."

"They've been together and all alone for more time than most of us can fathom. But you can bet that Tanya and Irina know as much of what might be going on between you and Katie as the two of you do. Maybe more. It's just the way of the sisters."

Edward nodded his agreement. "The three of them are fascinating to me as a mind reader. They don't read each other's minds, per se, but they _know_ each other's minds in ways that are so much different from my own gift."

"You and Tanya have always been very close?" Garrett asked.

"Tanya's family and my own have a unique bond," Edward answered, his eyes flicking over to Eleazar.

"You and she ever…"

Edward frowned at the young vampire, reading his lascivious thoughts. "I'm not her type."

It wasn't the first time someone had asked about Tanya and him. Of all the vampires that the Cullen family knew and dealt with, Tanya's family had been the most ever-present of all of them. But it had never been like that between the two of them, despite her beauty and her sweet disposition. She was like a sister to him; they all were. He found out in time that Tanya wasn't interested in him or any other man for that matter, but he didn't feel the need to share Tanya's preferences with Garrett. He'd find out soon enough if he did indeed join the family. He decided, instead, to change the subject all together.

"You truly believe it would be a death sentence to march upon Volterra?" Edward asked Eleazar.

"I think we should weigh the possibility of slaughter heavily against any other choices." Eleazar sighed and shook his head. "I don't know, Edward. There are just so many different ways that this could go badly. How does one choose the right course of action?"

"For my own part, I'd prefer to make the choice than have the choice thrust upon me," Garrett added, continuing to pick at the grass. "From what the two of you are saying, the Volturi will have the advantage no matter where the battle occurs. Why leave it to them to decide where and when it happens?"

"That's part of my point," Edward agreed. "It seems foolish to allow them to dictate the terms when we know that it will happen one way or another. To me, that's like asking for disaster."

"True," Eleazar said slowly. "Volterra, however, is such an impenetrable city. Trying to attack there leaves us open to being picked off one at a time at the gate."

Edward shrugged his shoulders. "It isn't as if we can send an invitation to them, inviting them to neutral territory. It seems it's either there or here. They would never expect an attack there."

Eleazar was silent, but his thoughts raced on in Edward's mind. _Don't underestimate what Aro expects or doesn't expect. He hasn't kept his spot at the top of the immortal world for so many centuries by ignoring the impossible._

"We could debate for the next month about what is the least expected course of action and be no closer to a conclusion," Edward said, his voice rising passionately. "We are all gathered; we are ready for a fight. I say we make plans with the other heads of coven to launch an attack."

Garrett nodded. "I can get behind that plan one hundred and fifty percent." The young vampire smiled, showing his teeth. "It's time Aro was knocked down a peg or twelve. Even if I die in this fight, I'll be happy knowing that my life was given in the service of so worthy a cause."

"That's very noble, young Garrett, but will you feel the same when one of Aro's goons throws you into the fires?" Eleazar asked morbidly.

Edward shook his head. "What do you say, Eleazar? Can I get your support on this?"

"You know I'll stand behind whatever you choose, Edward. And I will fight with everything in me. It's only my own fear of Volterra and the Volturi Guard that hold me back."

"I don't believe that for a second," Edward said. "This is no easy decision and you see too many ways for it to end in disaster. I don't blame you for your hesitation."

Eleazar nodded his head and looked out into the distance. "I support the decision to attack. Now, let us return home so that I can find my mate before the planning begins in earnest. I need Carmen to settle my mind."

Edward smiled and stood. "Agreed. The next few days won't be easy on any of us."

The three returned home to seek out the coven leaders for an impromptu meeting regarding the plans. A sense of urgency brought all of the vampires to the table, not just the leaders, and so the meeting was loud and unorganized. Bella, Alice, and Maggie were noticeably absent from the proceedings. Edward felt a momentary stab of annoyance at his sister for missing this meeting. She couldn't have missed this decision and she should have known that her say in the matter would have helped smooth the waters.

In the end, it took nearly the entire night to wade through each and every objection that was made. However, by the first sign of red sunlight in the sky, every one of the thirty-odd vampires who had gathered had given their support to the plan to attack Volterra. He felt more confident in his decision now that all of his friends had agreed that it was the best course of action. Still, something seemed missing.

Edward walked over to the wooden door and stepped out onto the wrap-around porch. He leaned against the railing and looked out into the distance, seeing the frost being to sparkle with the first touches of morning sun. For the first time all night, he had to time to wonder and that wondering led to a nagging worry that grew in the pit of his stomach.

_Bella, where are you?_

* * *

_**A/N**__: EEEP! Don't come after me. Chapter 28 is already in the works; you won't have to wait long to find out what the deal is with Alice, Maggie, and Bella. ;) Though I don't know if it will be only a week like this chapter. Mr. Java is home this week. Those of you with hubbies will know how distracting that can be … in both good and bad ways! ;) What do you think is going on with our favorite vamps? Drop me a note! I love to hear your guesses now that the action is really starting to heat up! I hope you all have a joyful and peaceful holiday season, however you celebrate! *hugs* ~Jen_


	28. Journals and Letters

_I'll sing it one last time for you_

_Then we really have to go_

_You've been the only thing that's right_

_In all I've done._

_And I can barely look at you_

_But every single time I do_

_I know we'll make it anywhere_

_Away from here._

_Leona Lewis, __**Run**__, 2008_

_**Disclaimer**__: You guessed it. I didn't write _Twilight. _But I did write this little fan-fic called The Foreign Papers, so no stealing. It's not nice. ;)_

_Many thanks, as always, to my girls – DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and Shasta53. They keep me in line and make me smile. All of you out there on the other side of FF world make me smile as well, so thank you for that!_

* * *

Edward left without a word after she kissed him, and Bella knew that he suspected. They'd always been open with each other – it was what she'd demanded when they first began working together – but now that there was so much on the line she could not tell him everything. And it was slowly killing her.

_If they come, we'll be killed_.

Alice's words hung in her mind like too-ripe fruit on a tree, threatening her very sanity. She'd known for about three days that the Volturi would succeed if they were allowed to find them in Scotland. Alice, being Alice, knew that she couldn't go to her brother. Edward had been waiting too long, looking for any chance he could to get his family back. If he were to hear that staying in Scotland was tantamount to suicide, Edward would run to Volterra without a second thought. And that, too, would be suicide. Bella was the key; Alice knew that. So as much as it pained Alice to do it, she hid from her beloved brother. She planned in secret with Bella.

Knowing she was either the key to the family's salvation or the precursor for its downfall did nothing to ease Bella's troubled mind. But Alice told her that she could save Edward from his own impetuous actions and that helped her to stay focused on the task at hand: finding the last clue within the documents.

Bella turned her attention back to the yellowed pages of the journals in front of her. Carlisle's meandering thoughts _did_ trouble her, as she had mentioned to Edward. He was ever the careful physician, documenting each case as it was presented to him. He didn't have the opportunity to practice as much as he would like, and mentioned of his stagnancy on many occasions in his journals, but when a case caught his fancy he documented it with meticulous precision.

The journal that interested her most, however, was not one of Carlisle's own cases. Instead, it was a journal written by another vampire; Carlisle had commented in the margins. Bella could smell the two distinct immortal scents on the books, though both had been badly degraded by time and poor handling. The other vampire appeared to be some kind of immortal liaison – Aro employed him to care for humans that he deemed worthy of immortality. In both this journal and in Carlisle's own, immortal transformations were referred to as "mutations." Carlisle wrote in one of his own journals about finding a record of "mutations" in the Volterra libraries. When Bella stumbled across this worn journal, she knew she'd found something immense in scale.

The journal detailed the careful grooming of humans Aro had chosen for immortal life. Even though Aro guarded his library and his treasures like a miserly dragon, he still must have insisted that this unnamed henchman write his journals in code. He didn't speak of vampirism, immortality, or transformation. Everything was giving another name; it was only with Bella's unique perspective that she was able to read between the lines and see what had been going on.

She estimated the age of the journal at around two hundred years old, well before the time when Carlisle's family had been abducted. However, she immediately recognized Carlisle's handwriting in the margins of the journal and _that_ ink had been added far more recently. It was, perhaps, as modern as five to ten years old. Clearly, this meant it was written during Carlisle's imprisonment with the Volturi. Excitement tingled in Bella's extremities as she poured over the journal, feeling in her very bones that she was on the edge of discovery. Bella smiled at the familiarity of the feeling – it was something she remembered from her humanity.

Careful scientific method was always first in her mind, despite her excitement. She carefully dutifully matched up the handwriting on each page to make sure no one was leading her down the wrong roads. Each and every notation had been written in Carlisle's unique, careful script. As she paused over the last entry in the journal, her breath caught in her throat. The original entry made her sink into a nearby chair, reading it repeatedly.

_28 Nov 1855_

"_L" arrived today. He is a boy of perhaps seventeen summers. Master feels him special, though I cannot in good conscience say that I agree with his assessment. He is scrawny, clearly unable to perform even the most menial task due to a strange brain affliction that renders him mostly incoherent. His eyes stare off blankly, and he mumbles and babbles nonsense most of the time. Master is most pleased with himself, but I daresay the boy's mutation will be a disappointment in the end._

_10 Dec 1855_

"_L's" affliction astounds! This morning, muttering as usual in incoherent babble as he dribbled orange juice down his shirt, he looked me straight in the eye. His dull, brown eyes lit up as he smiled fiercely at me. I felt a pain like a knife in my brain, and suddenly, with more clarity than he has ever shown, he spouted one of my first post-mutation memories verbatim. As quickly as it happened did it pass, but the incident makes me amend my former diagnosis. I now anxiously await master's approval for the mutation process to commence._

_20 Dec 1855_

"_L's" mutation set for 1 Jan 1856. Master insists on overseeing it himself, but I am to be "L's" tutor in his first days. I am abuzz with excitement on what we might expect from the lad._

_1 Jan 1856_

_A new year and "L" enters a new life._

_5 Jan 1856_

_Somethg wrng. "L"is ravenous for memories. God cannot save us now, nor can Aro. _

Bella didn't know who the vampire was who had written the original journals, but it was clear from the last semi-coherent entries and the gibberish that followed that he had been "L's" first subject. Bella felt her dead heart clench within her chest. She knew, of course, who "L" was and so did Carlisle as indicated by his notations: _"L" = Leo_.

Naturally, it was no surprise to Bella that Leo could absorb memories. This first documented case was a horrific example of how explosive Leo's gift could be. He'd likely eaten all of this vampire's memories and driven him quickly mad. Bella wondered what had become of the journal writer and felt sorry for the immortal who had been an unwitting pawn in Aro's game. She wondered further how many vampires Aro had sacrificed until Leo had perfected his talent, and how Aro himself had protected himself from the memory eater.

Carlisle had some thoughts on the matter. Still writing in code, of course, Carlisle's notes in the margins were fascinating looks into a brilliant mind. Bella was certain that Carlisle sensed something had gone terribly wrong not only with himself but with his whole family. When he added personal notes to his own journal, he talked of missing something or someone like a "phantom limb." It broke Bella's heart to know that Carlisle's phantom limbs were Edward and Alice. She knew that they must have seen those words and hoped that they provided some measure of comfort to the two siblings. Even if Carlisle didn't know why, he missed Edward and Alice so very much.

_Leo is ever-present around my family_, Carlisle had written after the one journal had turned to gibberish, _and A states that we must defend him with our very lives. Whose memories has he stolen, and why must he reside with us? Why, also, does my reasoning become clearer the farther from Leo that I travel? Troubling questions and ones to which I do not possess an answer. I wonder … no, it seems too fantastical to be true. And yet, I do not belong in Volterra. Perhaps…_

Bella nearly dropped the precious journal when she read the last note Carlisle had made. If Leo was "ever-present" with the family and Carlisle truly did become more lucid the further he traveled from him, then just maybe …

Alice raced into the library, her yellow eyes wide as she reached her hands up to Bella's shoulders.

"It's time," she whispered.

Bella nodded, placing the journal back on the table. "Yes," she agreed. "Get Maggie."

"Already here, hen."

Bella looked between Maggie and Alice and nodded once. "Let's go."

* * *

"I never thought that I could worry so and still remain so calm," Bella remarked as the three of them crested a hill about twenty miles south of the house.

"Tis an immortal thing," Maggie replied, flapping her hand in the air flippantly. "Are we fair enough awa' yet?"

She and Bella both looked at Alice whose faraway look hadn't changed much in the last several days. She had been spending a significant portion of her time in the future; it left her scattered and distant, but those who knew her knew she was anything but. She was wholly present for her family, doing the best thing that she could for them by covering every possible angle.

"No. Another twenty miles or so, and we'll be good."

The three of them dashed wordlessly across the terrain, moving quickly and silently through the dense trees. Alice stopped abruptly, causing Bella and Maggie to run past her in a blur before coming to a halt. They both turned around and waited for her to come out of her daze. She smiled at them weakly before sitting down on a fallen tree.

"We can regroup here," she said.

Maggie looked around, her eyes squinting as she calculated distances in her head. "Two days," she said thinly. "Tha's th' earliest we could be there, and tha's if we make some daft moves and travel by day sommat the time."

"As I told Bella earlier, I see three days," Alice said softly.

"I'll gae wi' ye, then," Maggie said drily. "We need tae pin down our plan. Alice, can ye see what Leo or yer family will be doing?"

Maggie's question spurred Bella to interject her findings into the conversation, something she'd been pondering the entire time they'd been running.

"I found something interesting in the papers," Bella said. "I don't think we'll find Leo very much separated from the family. I believe he needs to be close to them in order for his gift to continue working."

Alice shrugged. "Regardless, I can't see his choices as well. I don't know him and therefore don't know what to look for. I can see … Jasper … walking in a field."

Bella blanched at the pain in her sister's voice. She knew that if they got this close to Jasper and weren't able to turn around the damage Leo had caused, it would likely kill Alice. It made Bella even more determined not to fail.

"Do you know where the field is?" Bella asked gently, placing a hand on Alice's forearm.

Alice nodded, biting her lip. "It's just outside the walls of Volterra. That will give us some time, at least."

Maggie nodded. "It's worth a play, fer sure. Bella, ye ken this is mostly yer show. If we're right and the Cullens hae been trained tae fight for Leo, yer shield is going to have to cut off his gift or we'll ne'er stand a chance again' them."

Bella frowned and sighed. "The papers weren't that clear. I think that distance affects Leo's hold over them, but I don't know if that's the only connection."

"If the shield doesn't do it, you know what you'll have to do," Maggie said quietly.

"Yes. I know."

Bella didn't want to kill anyone. She remembered enough about her human life to know that only a few months ago, she would have been more likely to steal something from the Bode than to kill someone. Now, she was prepared to kill in order to save the family she'd never met. It was a strange dichotomy to consider, one that she didn't have time to ponder at the moment.

There was no sense in waiting any longer to begin their journey. There would be many stops along the way, with many quiet hours in hiding from humans where Bella would be alone with her own thoughts. It would give her time to consider what she would do if the only choice left to her was killing Leo. For now, as the light dimmed, she ran toward her fate. She wondered where Edward was and when he would find her letter.

* * *

_My Dearest Love,_

_ You once told me that I would be essential to you. I wonder if you, or even Alice, could've known just how true that is. Edward, I believe I've found the key to stopping Leo, but you must trust me and _wait.

_ I know it isn't within your nature to sit back, especially when your family or I are at risk, but that is just what I am asking you to do. Alice, Maggie and I have gone to Volterra. You mustn't follow right away. If you were to beat us there, if would jeopardize all of our plans. Meet us in three days' time at the gates of Volterra. It is my sincerest hope that at that time, I will deliver your family to you whole and with their memories repaired._

_ Edward, I know that it will be difficult for you to understand why I left you like this. I know that it is one of the most unforgivable things I could have done, and at a time when you need me most. When I see you again, I'll beg for your forgiveness if you want me to – but I'll do it with your father standing by your side._

_ Yours – Always,_

_ B._

The paper, so innocuous, fell out of a book Bella had left on their bed. He'd found it and almost thrown it out without a thought before he saw the flourished 'B' at the bottom of the page. He'd recognize that signature anywhere.

Now, his fingers tore tiny holes through the paper as he gripped it, shaking in anger and fear. His sister was gone. His _Bella_ was gone. They'd left sometime the previous day and begun a journey that would end in Volterra.

The scream built in his belly, rising up through his chest the way bile might have had he been human. It burst from his lips as he ripped the offensive letter in two. His hands, balled into powerful fists, hit the old wood framing that surrounded the window. It splintered and cracked, raining wood fragments from the rafters and shattering the glass.

A pair of hands, possibly more, grabbed at his shoulders, and he snarled as he turned around, his nostrils flaring as he looked around the room. His vision was clouded in a haze of red. How had he let this happen? How could he have been so consumed with his own choices that he let Bella think she needed to run to Volterra on her own? And Alice … God, how had he failed the two women he loved most in the world so immensely?

Tanya, Eleazar, and Benjamin, a young Egyptian vampire, stood in front of him. Their faces echoed the horror that was written plainly on his face. They cowered away from him as he looked from one to the other. Slowly, he breathed in and out, telling himself that he would achieve nothing if he continued to scream and rage.

"What is it, Edward?" Tanya asked gently. "What happened?"

"Bella – Alice – they're gone." His voice betrayed him, turning into a moan as he admitted the truth. "They've taken Maggie with them … to Volterra."

Tanya drew in a sharp breath and covered her mouth. Eleazar looked at Edward unblinkingly, his mind almost blank with fear as he considered what the three women were up against.

_But she chose to leave?_ Benjamin asked silently. _She was not abducted; you can rest easy …_

"I will _not!_" Edward snarled, coming within an inch of Benjamin's face. "Walking up to the gates of Volterra with a newborn and a psychic who is spread so thin with possibilities that she doesn't know today from tomorrow is as good as signing your own death warrant. Bella is brave, but she chose foolishly. And I blame myself."

"You would," Tanya murmured. "But do you really believe that Bella chose foolishly? Or that Alice doesn't know what she's doing?"

"Tanya, you and I both know it would be suicide …"

"For you or I, yes … it absolutely would be suicide. No doubt. But for Bella? No, I do not believe it is suicide. I think she knew that and that is why she chose to go alone."

Edward growled lowly as Tanya's calm, rational voice continued in his head. _Think of it, Edward. She can only shield five people fully, and only then for a few minutes. Taking two other people with her ensures that she can protect them for a good amount of time. She's being smart._

"Smart?" Edward asked, shaking his head. "She's being rash to try and save my family because she's been made to think she's the only one who can do it. Dammit! I need to find her."

"Let me see the letter," Tanya said, putting a hand in the middle of his chest and holding out her other hand expectantly.

Edward held the pieces of the letter greedily, but Tanya's pure intent was clear in his mind. After a brief moment, he handed it over to her with a sigh. She lined the two halves up carefully and read it quietly.

"It won't change anything. I'm going to get her."

_Of course you are,_ Tanya murmured in his mind. _However, you would do well to heed her words and _wait_._

Edward growled again, attempting to push past Tanya, but both Eleazar and Benjamin held him back. Tanya looked up from the torn letter defiantly.

"Do you think that she asked you to wait because she wanted to upset you? Or do you think, perhaps, there might have been a greater reason for her to ask you to remain behind for a few days?"

In his grief and the torture of being separated from Bella, he couldn't think properly but the calm thoughts of his friends entered his mind. For a moment, those thoughts silenced the wracking guilt that echoed in his head.

_Think of the chaos you would create running up to the gates of Volterra_, Eleazar said. _Think of what they would do to her if they found her _because _of you._

Edward didn't know how much of a head start the girls had on him, but it was likely that they would arrive before him even if he traveled at a breakneck speed. If they were going in under Bella's shield and he showed up, it could ruin any carefully laid plans that Bella might have. Edward shook his head, reminding himself that no plans would last longer than it took for them to enter the gates of Volterra. The Volturi were too strong, too capable, to be tricked.

_She's chosen a course of action_, Benjamin said calmly. _And she's given you instructions on how to help her. Don't you think that the best you can do is follow her instructions?_

"I can't just stand idly by while she sacrifices herself on this fool's errand."

"Fool's errand? Is that what we're on?" Eleazar asked quietly.

"No, _we_ aren't … it's just, with only Bella, Alice, and Maggie … how could it possibly be anything _but_?"

_This is a woman thing?_ Tanya growled in his mind.

Edward sneered in response. "You know it's not. Bella is barely trained as a fighter. Alice is so distracted by the future that she can't be trusted to know everything that's going on around her. And Maggie … Maggie has been itching for a fight with the Volturi for centuries.

"You are wrong, Edward," Tanya said. "And I think you know it. Tell me – what is it that Alice always said to you?"

Edward gave Tanya a hard look, crossing his arms across his chest. She pressed him in his mind, reminding him of all the times Alice had warned him not to second guess Bella.

"She told me to trust Bella."

"Then I suggest you do that," Tanya said, turning on her heel and exiting the room.

Edward sighed and looked out at the rising sun. He'd been vetoed. He could go alone, follow her through the day and night until he caught her, but where would all of his friends be if he did that? Bella could be anywhere on her way to Volterra. He wondered what Alice had seen, what had prompted them to deceive him so that they could go it alone.

"You'll torture yourself with wondering," Eleazar said, putting his arm around Edward's shoulder. "Come. We have a battle plan to revise."

The vampires in the house had all heard the disturbance. They'd gathered in the great room where the decision to attack Volterra had been made only an hour before. As Edward entered the room, he saw his haggard face reflected in their minds and knew that this had to end. Aro had taken so much; Edward would die before he allowed him to take Bella and Alice from him as well.

"We are no longer the advance attack," Edward whispered, his voice hollow as it bounced around the room. "We're to follow Alice, Maggie, and Bella … and I don't know what we will find when we arrive."

"We'll find a fight," a voice called from the back of the room. It was Garrett. He stepped forward into the light and looked at Edward levelly. "Doesn't matter how it happens, we knew this would end in a fight. With Bella and Alice already on their way, we'll have the advantage."

Edward sighed, nodding. He hoped that Garrett was right, that _Bella_ was right. "We leave at sunset. Hunt – prepare as you must. The time for planning is over; tonight, the battle begins."

* * *

_**A/N**__: I don't generally like to include both sides of the coin in one chapter, but I felt both Bella and Edward deserved a voice in this chapter. I hope that seeing Bella's work on the journals as well as Edward's discovery of her letter helped pull this plan together for you. Congrats to those of you who guessed that Bella and the girls were taking matters into their own hands. I hope that this chapter helped illustrate why she believed that it was the best plan. Remember that they won't be going in against the whole guard by themselves. E and the others are following behind and Alice has it planned so that they will arrive when she wants them there. A note about the last entry from the unnamed vampire who was Leo's first victim: his strange writing at the end is because of Leo's influence. It will become clearer later on how the gift progressed. Anyway, I hope that you are anticipating the next chapters as much as I am. Battles are, imho, tons of fun to write and read. I hope I can do it justice for all of you. *mwah* much love and happiness to you and yours in 2012! ~Jen_


	29. Attack!

_By the last breath of the four winds blow_

_Better raise your ears_

_The sound of hooves knocks at your door_

_Lock of your wife and children now_

_It's time to wield the blade_

_For no you have got some company._

_The Horsemen are drawing nearer_

_On the leather steeds they ride_

_They have come to take your life_

_On through the dead of night_

_With the four Horsemen ride_

_Or choose your fate and die._

_**The Four Horsemen**__, Metallica 1983_

_**Disclaimer**__: I don't own Twilight. Big surprise, I know. I do own a copy of Zumba for Wii and I rock out on it every day. It's awesome._

_**Important Author Note**__: Due to recent fuckery in the fandom, I wanted to let you all know that I fully support anyone who wishes to download copies of any of my stories for posterity. I would never remove my stories, but given recent events regarding a certain pulled to publish fan fic, I don't know that we can be sure the fandom will always have the ability to publish FF on this site. (Before you ask, I'm not getting into details. Just know there was fuckery and I'm not down with it. Lol) The only thing I ask is that you don't try to republish my stories anywhere without my permission and my name attached. Just ask … if you wanna list me somewhere, chances are I'll say yes. I've spent a lot of time on these stories and I wrote them for you; I want them available to you no matter what happens in the future. I'd just like credit for it wherever it is posted. _

_Many thanks to my beta team: DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and Shasta53. They are lovely women and all amazing writers. Check out anything by them; you won't be disappointed._

* * *

"Ready, hen?" Maggie asked, placing a reassuring hand on Bella's shoulder.

She nodded and focused her attention on her shield. _For Edward_, she told herself, and pushed it out. It stretched out like a great, flexible blanket, surrounding all three of them.

"You okay, Alice?" Bella asked.

Alice's eyes had narrowed the minute the shield fell over her, and Bella worried that it was interfering with her ability to see. The small psychic vampire surprised Bella, however, and turned toward her sister with a devilish smile on her lips.

"Let's kick some ass, sister," she growled.

Bella threw her head back and laughed, nodding. "Amen to that, Alice. Amen."

The enclosed city of Volterra sat atop a plateau in the middle of an eroding canyon. Unbeknownst to the humans in surrounding Italy, Aro used the strength and ingenuity of those on the Volturi guard to install steel rods within the core of the plateau to prevent any destruction to the city, despite massive erosion in the surrounding canyon. It was the perfect location for Aro's kingdom; remote and inaccessible to humans save for the winding, narrow bridge that led to Volterra's fortified gates. Without much thought, the vampires within were able to control who and what got in. Immortals who chose to scale the walls were dealt with swiftly and accordingly.

Bella and the others looked down on the walled city from the lip of the surrounding canyon wall. They could easily see the Volturi gates and the lone guard who perched like a cat within a small turret of the wall. To a human eye, he would be invisible. Immortal eyes, however, were very different. They could see the guard's red eyes watching for any movement. The girls' plan was to scale the side of the plateau quickly and walk along the thick stone wall. They could case the city from that vantage point and choose when to make their move. The field Alice had seen in her vision lay below the Volterra plateau, off to the side of the narrow bridge. The group decided, however, to check on the activities within Volterra before going to the field.

Bella felt more comfortable shielding the group if they remained close together; though she knew she could easily stretch it in case of an emergency. As they silently traversed the leeward side of the canyon toward the plateau, Bella felt her senses go into overdrive. This was what she had prepared for, and she knew it was time to put their plan into action. Surprisingly, she felt a wave of calm settle over her they neared the bottom of the plateau.

The seclusion of Bella's shield was uncomfortable for all of them, but it affected Maggie most of all. She felt exposed despite knowing that they were invisible. They were cut off from the scents around them; it made her feeling jumpy and unprepared. Still, there was no better way to approach Volterra than under Bella's shield. They climbed the rocky wall of the plateau, reaching the top in under a minute. Bella, again, marveled at the abilities that immortality provided her. The surface of the wall would have been impossible for even the most experienced rock climber to scale, and yet the three of them had no difficulty reaching the pinnacle.

"Alice, wha' do ye see?" Maggie asked, her red eyes darting back and forth as she surveyed the archaic buildings of Volterra.

"Aro is in his chamber attended by a fair number of the guard. There is some kind of meeting going on, and the brothers are exceptionally displeased. I don't see our family or Leo."

"Tha's in line wi' wha' ye saw earlier," Maggie murmured. "Can ye see what they're gon on wit'?"

"They can't find Edward, despite sending out dozens of spies. Caius is blaming Aro for letting it go so long. Aro is … biding his time."

Bella crinkled her brow. "What do you mean, 'biding his time'? What is he waiting for?"

"I don't know … it keeps shifting."

"He's blocking you," Bella said, frowning. "But what could he be hiding?"

"Battle plans," Maggie said gravely "Let's have a looksee quick-like and then go find yer family."

A few immortals walked around the city in broad daylight, their alabaster skin dazzling in the bright Italian sunshine. The decadence of what they were doing struck Bella immediately. It gave her a sense of what the vampire Aro was like. There was arrogance in the way he'd set up his dominion, flouting the very rules that kept other immortals out of sight. It was the same arrogance that made him believe possessing Alice and Edward was his right. Seeing those vampires out in the sun steeled Bella's resolve to end Aro's hold over the Cullen family.

Aside from those few immortals, the three saw no one else. Volterra was nearly a ghost town. Alice estimated that Aro had sent out upwards of thirty spies around the globe in search of Edward. It seemed, unsurprisingly, that they had picked the most opportune time to visit Volterra thanks, once again, to Alice.

"It's no right," Maggie said, shaking her head. "Makes me nervous te see tha streets deserted like this."

Maggie wrapped her arms around herself and shivered in a very unvampirelike way. Maggie's uncharacteristic behavior made Bella uncomfortable; of all of them, Maggie was the most experienced fighter. She was also the most familiar with the Volturi themselves. If she was worried, weren't they all in more danger than they thought?

"Bella, tis nothing. I've just ne'er seen Volterra like this afore," she explained, seeing the worry on Bella's face. "Volterra ha' always been tha envy of all immortals because ye could walk in tha daytime; ta see it almost empty … it's just no right."

Bella nodded and looked back toward Alice. She was concentrating, looking for the family. They waited in silence, Maggie's eyes trained steadily on the doors of Aro's great castle and Bella watching her sister.

"We'll find them in the field now," Alice murmured when she opened her eyes. "And Leo is with them."

As they moved along the wall and toward the narrow roadway that would lead down to the field, Bella wondered how close Edward and the others were. They had clearly followed her instructions and waited. They should be nearby. She wondered if the large group of immortals was waiting just outside of Volterra for some sign of them. They'd have it soon enough, she thought. In the valley just below, she saw six immortals spread out in a field.

* * *

They waited—perched twenty feet up the plateau—watching. The Cullens were engaged in idle pursuits: Carlisle was writing, Rosalie and Esme were reading together, and Jasper and Emmett were sparring. Some ways off, a lithe figure reclined in the tall grass, his brilliant red eyes darting back and forth among the family members. Though ostensibly he watched the family, there was something amiss with him. His angular, pale face sagged on one side, as though it had lost muscle tone. Bella nodded to herself; Leo was deteriorating under the strain of implementing his gift for such an extended time.

Alice's low growl startled Bella; it was a sound she had never heard before. Maggie moved quickly to hold Alice's shoulder, but the small vampire never moved an inch. Bella looked anxiously between Alice and Maggie, worrying her lip in a decidedly human fashion.

"Alice, honey, what are you seeing?" she asked quietly, reaching over and placing a hand over Alice's fingers.

Alice's bright, golden eyes snapped away from the field and up to Bella's, her bright red lips turned up in a sinister snarl.

"He's going to kill him," she hissed. "They've waited for this moment and now that I'm here, they'll kill him. And me too. They want to kill us all."

Her high, tinkling laugh, so familiar, sent a chill down Bella's spine. Alice's voice sounded wrong—her laugh, as well. The words made sense, but the tone didn't sound like Alice at all. She continued.

"I see blood, Bella," she murmured, licking her lips. "The field is bathed in blood. _My_ blood. They know they can't have me and now they're going to end my life, but not before they end his as well."

"Alice," Maggie said, a tremor in her voice. "Yer no makin' sense. Ye canna see yer own blood, hen. We've none of us _have_ any."

Alice laughed again, higher and stranger. "They like you to think that. But when he kills me, my blood will paint the field crimson."

Maggie and Bella exchanged glances. This wasn't a vision, at least not the kind Alice usually saw. She couldn't be seeing the actual future, because as Maggie said, what she just described was impossible. This vision Alice described was demented and twisted, a strange perversion of her true gift. It was as if …

"Oh, my God, Maggie," Bella breathed. "It's Leo. She's looking into Leo's future and it's driving her mad. Alice, stop. Stop searching. I'm begging you, baby. Stop for me."

Alice's face twisted and contorted, her golden eyes misting over as she continued to look into the future. Suddenly, her red lips rounded into a horrified 'o' shape. Her body shook, but no sound emerged from her mouth. Bella silently screamed for Edward, knowing only he would be able to calm Alice down.

"Oh, no," Alice whispered. "Oh, no you won't."

Her voice had lost the maniacal edge, and her eyes had become sharp again. She had stopped looking into the future, but somehow, Bella was not relieved.

"What you saw – it might not be what you think …"

Alice reached over and grabbed Bella's shoulder's tightly, a cockeyed smile on her face. She placed a gentle kiss on Bella's cheek before pulling away. "But it is," she murmured.

Before Bella could react, Alice had darted down the plateau. She was well out of the safety of the shield.

"Fuck!" Bella cried as the strain of Alice running through the shield made it snap back into place.

The Cullens immediately spotted Alice darting toward them, her arms flung open as she headed straight for Jasper. Bella knew exactly what she needed to do. Without wasting a moment to make sure Maggie was behind her, she flew down the steep incline and launched herself across the open field. Vaguely, she heard Maggie zooming up behind her, growling protectively, but she paid the sound no mind.

She darted in and out of sight—her shield covering her one minute and then uncovering another to confuse the other immortals. Leo was only a few hundred feet away. Emmett, a great bear of a vampire, swung his arms toward her. Before he had even come close, Bella had disappeared from his sight, concealed once again within her shield. She heard Maggie reasoning with Carlisle, using her gift to confuse him. She also heard the sickening sound of stone meeting stone as Alice crashed into another vampire. Bella couldn't look to see if Jasper had struck her; instead, she pushed herself harder.

Leo moved slowly, almost as slow as a human, rising up from his prostrate position on the ground and looking stupidly around the field. She could see his eyes rolling in his head, trying to process the sudden change in events. A growl rumbled in her chest as Bella neared him. With a great burst of speed, Bella reached the small vampire. She flung her arms up in the air and with them, her shield. As she grasped Leo around the neck, she threw her shield around him and prayed that it would work.

* * *

Silence.

Leo stood in her arms, sagging and non-combative. Bella held his head tilted back so that his neck was exposed to her teeth. Though her mouth was less than an inch from his neck, he didn't flinch away from her. Instead, he breathed calmly.

Disarmed, Bella turned her attention back to the rest of the vampires in the field. Rosalie's eyes were narrowed on Maggie, but her hand was touching her forehead, as though she was confused. Next to her, Esme's head was tilted to the side, almost as if asking a question. Her eyes were focused on her mate, who had stopped his conversation with Maggie quite abruptly.

"Bella, don't ye let him go," Maggie called.

Her voice rang like a bell across the field. It seemed to wake the others out of the stupor that had fallen over them when Bella had captured Leo. Rose turned round to look at Emmett.

"Where did the other one go? The one you almost had?"

"I dinna know," he murmured. "She wa' there, and then she wa' gone."

Though Bella didn't want to, she turned her eyes toward where she knew Alice had run. She gripped Leo more tightly as her eyes focused on Alice and Jasper. She took a breath for the first time when she saw her sister still standing, still fully intact. Jasper's arms were fully extended, hands on Alice's small shoulders. Her golden eyes shone as she beamed up into his face.

"I … know you," he murmured. "Carlisle, why do I know this female?"

Alice let out a happy moan and attempted to fling herself into his arms, but he still held her at bay. It didn't dampen Alice's spirit any; her smile was still as radiant as it was the moment she heard his voice again.

Carlisle appeared ready to speak, but something had reanimated the dead weight in Bella's arms. Leo sprang to life, surprising Bella with his quick movement. He grabbed at her arm and swung it around so that they were facing each other. She stretched her shield, making sure to keep him within its confines. Though the Cullens hadn't completely recovered, they showed definite signs of improvement. Exposing them to Leo full force might mean certain death for her and her friends.

"What kind of evil witch are you?" Leo asked, his voice a high-pitched lisp.

"Witch?" she hissed. "No … wrong mythological creature." She snapped her wrist, twisting her arm around so that her hand grasped Leo's forearm. She dug her nails deep into his flesh, smiling as he dropped to his knees. "But I am your worst nightmare."

Bella flashed behind him, once again grabbing hold of his white-blonde hair and yanking his head backward. She released his forearm and ran a fingernail down his exposed neck before grabbing the base of his neck with her whole hand.

"Im-possible," he gasped.

His eyes rolled in his head, always in motion, until they settled on Bella's. His mad eyes fixated upon her and suddenly she saw all of his insanity, churning there within the depths of his crimson irises. It drew her in, hypnotized her with the swirling endlessness of his disjointed thoughts.

"You see? Nothing could be worse than the nightmare of my own mind." Her grip loosened as pity filled her, but his hand covered hers at his throat. "Do it. Please."

Bella closed her eyes and twisted his head viciously off of his body, grimacing at the sickening sound of splitting granite. She opened her eyes. Leo's gaunt face had a peaceful expression on it for the first time since Bella spied him across the field. His frail body fell to the ground with a dull thump, and she was left holding his small head in her hands.

The silence was the first thing that drew her attention away from the somber sight of the lifeless body on the ground. None of the other immortals in the field made a single movement. Bella looked up and saw that they were all staring at her. Her shield must have snapped back as she tore Leo's head off. Aside from Maggie and Alice, the rest of the immortals on the field looked at her with a mixture of horror and surprise. All … save for Jasper.

The red-eyed warrior was staring in utter amazement at the small vampire he held in his arms, recognition written all over his face.

"Alice?" he whispered hoarsely. "I don't – what happened?"

Alice turned back toward him, a beatific smile on her face. "It doesn't matter now."

He leaned his forehead against hers, and the moment was too tender to continue watching. Instead, Bella turned her attention to the tall, golden-haired vampire next to Maggie. Carlisle – Edward's father – she had so many questions, so many things to tell him. Bella was certain that he would have as many questions for her. She opened her mouth to speak, but he held up a single finger and stepped forward.

"I don't know who you are," he murmured, "but you've saved my family. I want to thank you, but first we must destroy Leo."

Collectively, the family's eyes turned harshly on the prone body at Bella's feet. Their immortal minds had bridged the gap quickly; they understood enough of what Leo had wrought to want him gone for good. Emmett stepped forward, his great size making Bella take a single step backward.

"Don't be afraid," a beautiful voice said. "My husband will finish the job."

Bella looked up to see Rosalie regarding her kindly. Emmett held out his hand, and Bella gladly handed over the head. With a fluid movement, Emmett drew a lighter from the satchel hanging around his waist. Flicking it open, he set fire to the head and tossed it on top of Leo's body. Bluish-purple smoke plumed up into the air as the body ignited. Bella cringed at the acrid odor of burning immortal flesh.

In an instant, the flames had burned themselves out, and Leo was nothing more than a pile of ash. Bella shuddered at the finality of it, of the sheer magnitude of what she had done. Before her, lay a being who had walked the earth for centuries, and she had ended its life. Regardless of what he'd done to her family, the reality of it left her feeling hollow. She was not meant to be a killer. Bella looked up pleadingly at the great mountain of a man standing in front of her, venom stinging her eyes as the human reflex to cry over the dead consumed her.

"Perhaps ye'll tell us what's become of our brother, Edward?" Emmett asked, his face serious.

"Bella is Edward's mate," Alice said, flashing across the field with Jasper. Her hand remained entwined with his; Bella doubted either would let the other go until they were well away from Volterra. As Alice approached Bella, her eyes became clouded over. She was searching the future.

Astoundingly, the family all waited quietly for her to finish, as though not a moment had been lost in their time together. They seemed to all move as a unit, each so in tune with the rest that their bodies almost mirrored one another. Alice bit her bottom lip as she emerged from her trance. She looked first at Bella and then at Carlisle.

"It's time," she whispered.

From above, a great roar sounded. They all looked up to see the thirty-odd vampires Edward had amassed storm from every direction toward the gates of Volterra. Bella saw Edward's shining, bronze hair leading the pack, his mouth drawn back in a menacing grimace. He leapt up just as the lone gate-guard jumped from his perch, catching him in midair. Bella both heard and saw Edward tear the unknown immortal's head from his body.

"Edward," Carlisle whispered.

And without another word, the entire family streaked across the field toward Volterra.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ A few reminders, since it's been a bit since we talked about everyone's history. Maggie's gift is not judging the truth (as it is in canon); instead, she is able to implant whatever idea she wishes into another's mind. She is telling Carlisle the truth in this chapter, but because of Leo's gift, it is difficult for her gift to work. We'll hear more about that later, when they have a chance to talk. Also, Emmett is Scottish as well; Rosalie found him on a battlefield in Scotland and he would have been a Highland warrior. Think Jaime from the _Outlander _novels. *SWOOOON* Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter. The next will be soon in coming, I assure you. Combining the full battle would have been far longer than I usually make chapters and I felt that this was a good breaking point. See you next time, loves! ~Jen_


	30. Battle is Waged

_Dead I am the life, dig into the skin_

_Knuckle crack the bone, 21 to win_

_Dead I am the dog, hound of hell you cry_

_Devil on your back, I can never die_

_Dig through the ditches_

_And burn through the witches_

_I slam in the back of my_

_Dragula_

_**Dragula**__, Rob Zombie 1998_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own _Twilight _or its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers. This chapter contains graphic descriptions of an Immortal Azz-Whipping. Fair warning. ;)_

_Many thanks to DeJean Smith, Shasta53, and Swimom7 for their beta and pre-reading skills. They provide guidance and support, as well as an awesome sense of English grammar._

* * *

_The fuck?_

As Edward scanned Felix's mind, he saw the three females dashing across the field and fear gripped his immortal heart. It was happening. Felix, given the duty of guarding the city while his masters conducted business, was in a quandary. He knew that Leo, Aro's most treasured pet, was in the field below, but to leave the gates unmanned would mean his certain death. The Cullen clan was, after all, down there to protect Leo. Felix vacillated back and forth on what his action should be. All the while, Edward watched the action through the guard's mind.

He saw Bella darting in and out of sight as she used her shield to slip through the Cullen family toward Leo. When Edward saw Leo disappear from sight, he closed his eyes and bit fiercely into his own knuckle to keep himself rooted in place. He wanted to know what was happening beneath Bella's shield, but it was too dangerous at this moment to reveal their position. Instead, he was forced to wait.

_What do you see, Edward?_ Eleazar asked.

"It's starting," he replied simply.

The group of nearly forty immortals was spread out along the ridge of the canyon, far enough away from the edge to avoid detection from the guard, but close enough that Edward could still read the minds of those within the walls. He thanked fate that Benjamin had chosen to join the fight. His gift had ensured a good cloud cover for the entire journey and now shielded the entire canyon with an uncharacteristically dark sky.

Felix's mind jolted into overdrive when Bella suddenly appeared, holding Leo's head in front of her with an expression of utter astonishment on her face. Edward shuddered, the reality of her actions hitting him hard. He was both amazed by her strength and saddened by the loss of her innocence—he hadn't wanted blood on her hands any more than she had wanted it. But he wasn't naïve; he knew that she was well aware of what the battle had meant and she had been prepared to kill.

Felix's quandary continued, the options spinning out within his mind as he watched the vampires on the field change before his eyes. Carlisle and the rest, who had been wary and confused by the new arrivals only minutes before, were suddenly focused, alert, and responsive to the females. Emmett was burning Leo's body. _Good riddance_, Edward thought. Words were spoken quickly, but Felix didn't make up his mind to act until Alice got the familiar faraway look in her eye.

It all happened at once. Felix made the decision to intervene at the same moment that Alice's eyes opened wide. Edward heard her saying _It's time_ in his mind at the same moment that he raised his arm and leapt toward the narrow bridge, rallying his group into action. It seemed choreographed like a fine dance. His body surged toward Felix, and he launched himself into the air, catching the surprised vampire in mid-air and severing his head with a feral grunt.

As he landed, catlike in front of the massive gates with Felix's head in his hands, Edward heard Carlisle's whisper carried over the expanse on a breeze.

"Edward," his father had said, and there was recognition in his voice.

Others heard Carlisle's voice as well, and turned toward the sound, watching as the group of eight immortals sped toward the plateau and made their way up. Leading the way was Bella, her brown hair streaking out behind her as she kept her eyes focused on Edward. He was still angry with her for leaving the way she did. He couldn't help the feeling of abandonment that filled him, despite knowing that she was doing the best she could for both of them. In the end, however, Edward couldn't help opening his arms to her as she flew to his side, burying her face in his chest. He held her stiffly, his mind focused on the chaotic thoughts within the walled city. Bella's face was hidden in his shirt, but he could hear her mumbling over and over again, "I'm sorry."

"Shh," he hushed her, attempting to keep the fear and worry out of his voice. "We'll talk later."

She looked up at him, her crimson eyes at once nervous and understanding. Edward looked up the gates. They could all hear the sound of feet moving quietly over the stone walkways within the walled city.

_Son, I hope to God you came with a plan_, Carlisle said, his voice a welcome intrusion amid the chaotic thoughts that pummeled Edward's brain. _Whatever the outcome, know that your family is with you_.

"Thank you," Edward whispered.

A movement in the parapet far above the gate put an end to any discussion. Aro, a billowing, black cape flowing around him, stood looking down over his city and the entrance. Felix's body lay at Edward's feet, waiting to be burned. It was easy enough to gather what had occurred in the field, seeing that the family stood with Edward and the others while Leo was nowhere to be found.

"My friends!" Aro cried, clapping his hands dramatically. "Come, come! Open the gates and let them in!"

In an instant, Aro's words were obeyed and the great gates began to open. With his arm still around Bella, Edward was pleased to feel both Carlisle and Emmett step forward to flank him. Guttural sounds of snarling and hissing rose up around the family as the large collection of immortals took in the scene waiting behind the gates.

Aro had amassed his entire collection of immortal minions, or at least those who remained within Volterra. It was obvious that many were absent. Aro was counting, matching up his own fighters with those who had come with Edward. The Cullens and their assembled friends were still outnumbered, badly; but Edward felt that their gifts might help tip the scale in their favor.

Tension was high as Edward took the first step through the gate. Bella held tightly to his arm, lowering her shield for a moment to allow her voice into his mind.

_No matter what happens, I love you_. Though Edward didn't respond, unwilling to share that moment with anyone, her voice in his mind was a cool salve for the past several days he had burned without her. With Bella by his side and his family restored to him, Edward felt more confident than ever.

"To what do we owe the _pleasure_ of your company, Edward?" Aro asked, his voice sugar-sweet. "Finally decided to make an honest man of yourself?"

Edward growled lowly at the picture he saw in Aro's mind: himself clothed in Volturi grey, a blood red 'V' upon his chest marking him as Aro's man.

"Speaking in the royal we, Aro?" he hissed. "I see things haven't changed much in Volterra. You stand on high while you send your slaves out to do your dirty work."

The assembled guard hunched low and growled at Edward's insult. In response, those on the Cullen side of the battle responded in kind. Aro, however, laughed and whirled around in the tower, murmuring to the two others who stood behind him. In a flash, Aro and his brothers, Marcus and Caius, were emerging from the door. Up close, Aro's smile was less natural. There was a pinched quality that betrayed his surprise and displeasure.

"Now, what dirty work do you speak of, Edward? Surely you aren't daft enough to bring your friends to their deaths by trying to attack us, are you?"

"No one came to die, Aro," said a harsh voice behind Edward, "but we didn't come to have tea, ye ken?"

"Oh, of course I ken, Maggie," Aro replied, his voice ice-cold as he imitated her accent. "For if _ye_ wish it, _I'll_ believe it, right?"

_He's baiting us, Edward_, Maggie said in his mind. She didn't have to explain it to him, but he understood her frustration. Aro wanted to give the appearance of wanting no quarrels. He liked to make a spectacle of being magnanimous and good, but he couldn't hide his true intentions from Edward. No one gathered in front of Volterra was buying his act, however, and it left him at a loss.

"Go on, Aro," Edward jeered. "I know you're curious." Aro's eyes narrowed on him, resentment coloring his thoughts as Edward illustrated how read the leader's thoughts. Edward could sense the intense curiosity, the speculation on exactly how he had managed to free the rest of the Cullens and what he had done to Leo. "I have a gem of my own, you see."

Edward's eyes fell on Bella, a feeling of tenderness filling him as he introduced his mate with pride. He knew that exposing her as the perpetrator of the rescue was a bit of a risk, but there was something to be gained by it as well. Aro liked to measure and balance out his dealings with others; he hadn't weighed Bella into the equation and Edward was anxious for him to do so. He wanted to see the look of fear and resignation cross the old Volturi leader's face.

"So…" Aro breathed, his red eyes traveling greedily over Bella. The envious coveting Edward read in his mind made him growl protectively and pull Bella closer to him. "You've been naughty, Edward. Creating pretty little pets didn't seem to be your style, but perhaps time has changed you?"

Edward could see the implication in Aro's mind. He thought Bella had been created as part of an army.

"Creating slaves is your trick, Aro. Bella is my mate; her talent was a surprise to us all."

"Even to Alice? How truly amazing she must be," Aro crooned, stepping forward.

He held out a pale white hand toward Bella and in an instant, Edward had whipped her around behind Jasper and Emmett. The three males crouched low, their lips curled to show their teeth.

"I don't think so, Aro," Edward hissed. "You won't be getting our memories that easy."

"I will _get_ whatever I want," Aro murmured, his red eyes narrowed on Edward. "You don't think I'll let you steal my prize possession from me without repercussion, do you?"

"You tortured him," Bella hissed. Her voice was so vehement, so _angry_, that it made Edward straighten from his defensive position and turn his eyes toward her. "Leo didn't even know what he was, really. You used him, as you use _all_ of them. He was as disposable as any of your army, I'd wager. As disposable as any of us would be if you had us."

Aro chuckled awkwardly as many of the guard members looked around suspiciously. Edward could see the guard members weighing Bella's words, sensing the truth at the heart of her bold declarations.

"Don't be a foolish newborn," Aro sneered. "I hold sway over the most powerful and talented guard the Immortal world has ever known; of _course_ they are invaluable to me."

"You don't own them," Bella continued.

A collective gasp ran through both the guard and the gathered immortal army that faced them as Bella disappeared from view. Edward felt the air stir as she flew past him. Jasper and Emmett, though so closer to Bella, seemed shocked when they blinked one minute and she was gone.

"Bella, no!" he whispered.

Too late. When she reappeared, Bella was inches from the Volturi leader, at least five guard members between himself and her. Aro drew back, surprised to find the volatile newborn in his face. As he did. two members of the guard advanced on Bella, lunging for her to rip her to shreds.

She was able to shield herself before the guards attacked, but her foolish move set everyone in motion and decided the course of the battle quicker than Edward had wanted. He lunged forward, narrowly missing Bella as he reached for the two guard members who had clashed together. They saw him coming, but he saw both of their thoughts and was able to correct his movements appropriately. Without much effort on his part, Edward dismembered both of the guard members and threw their limbs at Aro's feet.

The three brothers turned in a swish of black cloaks and retreated to the tower, putting both distance and many guard members between themselves and the heat of the battle. Edward could be patient, but he had no intention of leaving Volterra until Aro was reduced to ash.

Small battles arose between groups of two or three all around him while Edward bided his time. He was listening, waiting to see who would go for whom and where his help would be most needed. His gift was spread thin as he listened in on so many immortal minds. He knew the minds of his compatriots well, but it was difficult for him to decipher some of the newer guard members' voices. Emmett and Jasper fought to maintain a circle around him while he listened, battling off potential adversaries. But even with Edward's powerful advantage, there wasn't time enough for him to escape Jane's swift moving gift.

The burning hit him almost immediately after he saw the intent in her mind, making him throw his head back and fall to the ground. He mouth gaped open, a horrifying shriek reverberating around the courtyard. Time seemed to stand still for Edward; awash in blinding pain, his mind was completely blank for the first time in centuries. There was nothing, no thought, above the fire that seemed to consume him.

As quickly as the burning began, it ceased. Edward felt his body wrapped in a gentle embrace, and he immediately stopped screaming. Jane let out a surprised yelp when she realized that Edward was no longer feeling the effects of her gift, but the sound was quickly drowned out by a vicious growling. Edward looked over and saw Bella crouched and snarling, her red eyes trained viciously on Jane.

"Bella, stand down," he cried, panic filling him.

Jane had been a member of the elite guard for centuries. Though she rarely had to fight because of her unique gift, she was trained and she was deadly. A skirmish between the two of them would almost certainly end in Bella's death. Edward couldn't allow that, but Bella didn't have any intention of standing down.

As Jane narrowed her eyes on Bella, Bella simply chuckled. "Maggie told me about you. Your gift won't have any effect on me, Jane."

Jane's perfect, little face screwed up in frustration. She looked to Edward like a cranky child, so much smaller and more delicate than the rest of the guard. He wondered for the first time exactly how old Jane and her brother Alec had been when Aro turned them. In a defiantly childish move, Jane stomped her foot and turned her eyes toward Maggie. Bella chuckled louder.

"Go on, then," she murmured. "Knock yourself out. Every one of my friends is protected."

Bella took a step forward and Jane's eyes widened dramatically as she realized her gift wouldn't protect her. Edward had a difficult time believing that Bella had shielded everyone on their side, but as he looked around the field, following Jane's desperate thoughts, he saw that she gained no purchase on any of them. Try as she might, she couldn't bring anyone to their knees and it both angered and frightened her.

"Picking my mate as your first target may _not_ have been in your best interest," Bella murmured, darting across the battle field.

All around them, vampires were fighting for their lives. Emmett and Jasper had found their mates and were fighting next to them, leaving Edward to help Bella. The sound of twisting immortal flesh clashed with screams and battle cries. It was disorienting, and the perfect camouflage for Bella's attack on Jane. Everyone else was preoccupied with their own fights; Jane had been left to fend for herself and Edward was beginning to see that Bella was more than capable of fending for herself.

Edward moved forward, ignoring the residual burn from Jane's fire-torture, and stepped up beside his mate. He wouldn't hold her back, but he wouldn't allow her to fight without him by her side. Just as the rest of the couples in his family were doing, he and Bella would fight together. She looked over at him, a faint smile on her lips as she turned back to Jane.

"This isn't possible," Jane argued, backing noisily against a wall. "Even Renata can't shield my gift."

"It just so happens that Bella is far stronger than Renata," Edward said with a smirk.

They both took a step toward Jane, closing in the distance between them and the cornered vampire. She hissed and shrank down in a defensive posture. Edward could see in her mind that she was frantic with fear, certain that she would be killed in any second. He was so focused on Jane's voice that he missed a nearly identical voice that had just taken notice of what was happening.

Alec flew past Edward, slamming the meaty part of his arm into Edward's back and knocking him off balance for a moment. When her brother was beside her, Jane's thoughts cleared almost immediately. For a brief moment, Edward caught a glimpse of one of Jane's memories and saw a side of her that he hadn't expected. Like two halves of a whole, Jane was uncomfortable without her brother by her side. As he put his arm around her, she remembered brief flashes of the near-fatal burning at the stake that they had endured just before Aro swept in and saved them. He had turned them then and there, beginning their transformation while their bodies still smoked from the flames.

The memory was awful, and Edward winced at having experienced it along with Jane. Her burgundy eyes bore into his, knowing that he had seen what she was thinking. Edward felt hatred rolling off of her, and knew that she was trying with renewed effort to inflict her gift upon them. Still, Bella allowed her no access to their group.

"No, sister," Alec murmured, his voice gentle and slow, like a soporific. "Allow me."

Edward braced himself, grabbing hold of Bella's hand so that he wouldn't lose her when Alec's gift hit them. To his great surprise, he didn't feel the slow deadening of his senses that he had expected. Alec seemed shocked as well, his brows crinkling together in frustration as he focused more intently on anesthetizing his opponents.

"It won't work," Bella said, tilting her head. "Your gift feels different against my shield than your sister's. While hers is like tiny stabs of energy, yours rolls like a smoke cloud toward me. You won't find a hole, though."

Alec's calm façade began to break as a growl rumbled in his chest. It was unusual to see either of the witch twins ruffled in any way. Edward marveled at the way the two of them linked hands without consciously thinking about it; there was a need for contact between the two of them and they sought it out instinctively.

Jane picked up Alec's growl the moment their hands touched. In tandem, the two of them stepped toward their attackers. Edward and Bella crouched low and blocked the twins' path with their bodies, a warning hiss rising from both of them. Edward heard Bella's voice in his mind naturally, as though he had been expecting it even before she decided to speak to him.

_We will do this together_, she said gently in his head. _Are you ready?_

With a slight nod of the head from Edward, the two fully grown vampires launched themselves at the tiny twins. Neither Jane nor Alec made a real attempt to fight back. As always for Edward, the killing blows were terrifyingly chilling to him as he heard both Jane and Alec's last thoughts. They were of each other, and he was glad at least that they would go into whatever the next world was with their twin by their side.

Edward took only a moment to pity the young witch twins before throwing their bodies on the growing pyre. It was belching an ugly, purple smoke that smudged the Volterra sky and choked the air with the smell of burning immortal flesh. He knew that there were likely friends within the flames, but he didn't have time to look for who might be missing. There was still much fighting left to do.

* * *

Throughout the fight, Edward kept tabs on his family's voices in his head. It was comforting to have the familiarity of them with him, knowing that they were safe because he could hear their thoughts.

The battle raged on and Edward lost track of the number of guard members he and Bella had laid waste. Hot, yellow flames heated the courtyard in front of the Volturi tower and filled the air with thick, purple smoke. It belched the sickening ash of dead immortals, and Edward mourned for the loss of so many, even of those whom he fought against. The battle they were waging would significantly change the face of vampirism, laying waste to so many who had been in a position of power. He wondered briefly what kind of order would be left if he and his family succeeded in winning freedom from Volturi rule.

The price had been great so far for their side as well. He knew from reading Tanya's mind that her sister, Irina, had been killed. Tanya and Kate were both so distraught that it was difficult for Edward to pick out which guard member had killed Irina, but he knew that the remaining Denali sisters were unconcerned with the actual perpetrator. They had their sights set on the three Volturi brothers: Aro, Caius, and Marcus. In deference to his family's plight, Tanya was willing to allow Edward the first shot at Aro, but she wouldn't back down if given the chance.

And Edward wanted Aro for himself. Badly.

He was not the only one, however, and he felt that the other vampire who wanted Aro had just as much, if not more, claim to him than he himself did. Carlisle was moving steadily closer to the parapet, his thoughts focused and clear. He wanted to get up to that throne room, and he wanted to rip Aro's head off.

It was somewhat unsettling for Edward to hear his usually gentle father think such vicious thoughts, but Edward couldn't blame Carlisle. The years that Aro had stolen from him, the magnitude of the memories he had hidden from him – it was all too much for one man to bear, even one as great as Carlisle.

Edward kept Bella by his side. Carlisle saw the two of them coming from the other side and told his son silently what his plan was. It was a good one, and Edward motioned quickly at Bella so as to make her aware of what they had in mind. With her shield at their disposal, and with most of the elite guard decimated, Edward liked their chances very much.

Maggie's familiar head of bobbing, red curls caught Edward's attention as she sidled up to the bolted door of the tower. He didn't know how she had managed to slip so far behind the guard's line of defense, but he didn't pause to wonder. That was simply Maggie. He immediately focused in on her, wondering what her plan was, and she seemed to expect him to do so.

_Let me pave the way for ye, Edward_, she thought. _I'll save you a piece if yer fast. _Her lips curved into a faint smile as she cast her eyes in his direction.

Edward smirked as she winked at him, shaking his head. Quietly, she tore the iron bar off of the door and threw it to the side carelessly. It was only there for show, of course; it would never keep out a vampire who wanted entrance. But Edward could see in Aro's panicked mind that this was the first time any vampire had sought entrance to his throne room without his express permission. The panic and the insipid reluctance to believe that anyone would dare try to harm him amused Edward. He hoped that Maggie tortured him just a little before he and Carlisle got there; Aro, as much as anyone, deserved a little bit of drawn out fear and pain.

Keeping an ear on Maggie, Edward and Bella fought their way through a seriously depleted last line of defense. By rights, Jane and Alec should have been standing in their way, along with Felix, Corin, Chelsea, and Demetri. Jane, Alec, and Felix had all been killed. Edward saw that Chelsea and Corin were nowhere to be found. That was a valuable to their side, as Edward knew that the two females used their gifts together to keep Aro's subjects both loyal and submissive.

Edward saw the battlefield differently, having ascertained which guard members had been eliminated. Demetri was there, but he was no longer actively fighting. Instead, he stood along one of the large walls, his arms crossed in front of him and a confused look upon his face. Edward saw that he was, for possibly the first time in his life, considering the life he had been dealt. The wiry, muscled vampire did not look pleased, and Edward couldn't help but be thankful that he didn't seem inclined to protect his Masters any longer. Not only did Demetri have strength and tactical ability on his side, he had a gift that was similar to Edward's, at least during battle. He could pick up on the leanings of someone's mind and be able to follow them. In the long term, it made him a powerful tracker, but when used in battle, it made him nearly impossible to defeat.

Santiago, and a new guard member that Edward only knew through thoughts of his compatriots by the name of Kenneth, stood in front of the door. Santiago was only marginally smaller than Felix had been, and Edward saw that he had been vastly short-changed in the intelligence department. He didn't fully understand what was going on, only that he had been asked to protect Aro, and he was going to do it. Kenneth was not so simple for Edward to read.

He seemed to have an offensive gift, similar in fashion to Jane's in that it could only work on one opponent at a time, but it was not as immediate or debilitating as hers had been. And though he possessed the gift, he was not even trying to use it against any of them. He wouldn't have been successful had he tried because of Bella's shield, but it was odd that he wasn't attempting to protect himself.

"Kenneth, we mean you no harm personally," Edward said, earning a questioning look from Bella.

Neither Carlisle nor Esme looked at him; despite the long separation, they were both very used to Edward's tactic of speaking to someone's doubts.

"Why have you come, then?" Kenneth asked. "And how did you know my name?"

"Aro stole my father's memories – he stole my entire family's memories – all in an attempt to coerce me into joining him. None of the Cullens were here by choice, no matter what he may have told you."

"Who cares?" Santiago roared. "Master is in there, and he'll see us as ash if we let them pass."

Kenneth turned his red eyes on Santiago and the giant immortal dropped to his knees, silent and dumbstruck. Kenneth's gift was not for pain, as Edward had first assumed. It seemed he possessed an accurate and swift version of Alec's gift. He'd rendered Santiago motionless and senseless, almost frozen in time.

"Our kind has never had a choice," Kenneth replied, as though Santiago had never interrupted. "The Brothers say it has always been so – that a few rule over the many so as to keep immortality safely hidden from the mortals."

"But we do have a choice, friend," Edward said reassuringly. "There is freedom beyond these walls that is far greater than the ability to walk around in the daylight."

As Kenneth considered Edward's words, weighing his options for the first time without the haze of Corin and Chelsea's combined gifts, Demetri seemed to have made a decision. He leapt off of the wall and strode over to where Edward and the others waited. Kenneth saw Demetri approach and appeared ready to cripple him as well, but both Demetri and Edward held up their hands.

"I can't fight against them," Demetri said as he approached Edward. "But I won't fight against you either."

Edward nodded, but Carlisle stepped forward with his hand extended.

"We understand, and thank you for your decision."

"I'm sorry for the pain we must have caused your family, Carlisle," Demetri said, shaking his head. "It all seems so clear now, but before … I never would have guessed."

"Aro made sure that you wouldn't. Please do not blame yourselves for what he and his brothers have wrought."

"I'll guard your back," Demetri said. "With Kenneth, if that's his choice."

Kenneth seemed shocked that a member of the elite guard had given him a choice. After a moment's pause, he nodded his head.

Demetri bent down and picked up Santiago, frowning. "Can you keep him out of our hair until this is over?"

"The shock will last for an hour on an average immortal. Santiago is … somewhat more than average, so it may last less than that."

"If we can't accomplish our goal within an hour, we won't accomplish it," Edward said stiffly.

"Good luck … friend," Demetri said, extending his hand.

Edward took it and nodded his head. As he turned back toward the tower, he felt hope for the future in Demetri's decision. Certainly not all of the guard would be as easily won over, but there was a chance that in time Aro's legacy would fade away.

"No," Edward said suddenly, crouching low and listening carefully to the thoughts coming from inside the tower. "Dammit, it's Maggie."

She'd made it up the tower and past many of the guards. She'd killed three of them on her way up, each time convincing them that she was still a member of the guard. But Renata … she was not as easily convinced.

Edward, Bella, Carlisle and Esme flew up the stairs. Behind them, he heard Tanya and Kate, along with Garrett, following close behind. They emerged at the top of the stairs into a gleaming black throne room, hung with red and gold spun silk banners. The three thrones, each with the first initial of the brother for whom it had been made, sat in the center of a raised dais. Aro's throne, the largest and the one in the middle, was the only one that was occupied. The other two brothers stood motionless behind Aro, watching the action in front of them. Aro sat lazily, watching as Renata tore Maggie's arms from her body.

"No!" Edward cried, clutching his temple as he heard Maggie's scream both in his head and ringing in his ears.

Bella let out a tiny cry as she saw her friend fall to the ground. The spark had gone out of Maggie's eyes, but she was not dead yet. Her mind reeled with the pain, but through it Edward caught bits and pieces of her thoughts. She wasn't speaking to him, per se, but he was surprised at the honesty and coherence of her thoughts as she looked helplessly on her attacker.

_It will hae been worth it for him_, she thought. In Maggie's mind, a picture of Edward smiling the first time they'd met came into view. It was followed quickly by flashes of brilliant color, a rehash of every moment they'd spent together. It ended with her memory of the first time she'd seen him look at Bella. He saw the pain in her mind that she had hidden so well. _I tricked ye after all, my Edward_.

As Renata tore her head off, Edward caught a glimpse of Maggie's familiar, roguish smile. Before he even had a moment to react, Renata had thrown Maggie's remains into a pit at the side of the room and lit them on fire.

The gut wrenching guilt that hit Edward after what he'd seen in her mind made him stagger backwards, his hands still clutching his temples. All around him, his family was taking up battle stances, but he couldn't get the picture of Maggie's tragic smile out of his head. He knew now that the "casual feelings" he thought they'd shared had been only one-sided; for Maggie, they had been everything. And still, she bore him no jealousy. In fact, she'd been happy for him. Her sacrifices would not go in vain. Slowly, he raised his golden eyes to look around the room.

Bella seethed, her shoulders rising and falling angrily as she looked at Renata. The Volturi shield returned Bella's gaze almost carelessly – she hadn't yet come in contact with Bella's shield, but Edward felt certain that his mate was about to put Renata squarely in her place.

"You may want to pull it back to you during this," Edward murmured, touching Bella's hand.

"I've got this," she whispered. "Go. You and Carlisle have work to do."

"You think I'll let them anywhere near my Master?" Renata screeched. "You saw what happened to the little tart who tried to get by me last time … would you care to add fuel to our fire, newborn?"

Bella grunted and spread her legs defensively, her eyes trained unblinkingly on Renata.

"You can try and stop me," Bella hissed. "But I don't think you'll have as easy a time deflecting me as you did my friend."

The sound of their shields hitting each other was deafening; even the three Volturi brothers shuddered at the loud, blunted thump. When Edward looked up, Bella was on her feet standing over Renata who had been knocked to the ground. With Aro's shield busy, Edward could focus on his sole purpose for coming to Volterra. It was time to put the Volturi's reign behind them.

Edward and Carlisle moved as one, advancing on Aro. He remained seated, one leg thrown lazily over the arm of his chair. It enraged Carlisle to see the leader acting so casually as he was approached by no less than seven vampires; he felt it was an insult to all present that Aro seemed so sure of himself. Edward didn't bother being perturbed by Aro's lack of self-preserving humility – he felt that soon enough, he and his father would give the old leader something to be afraid of.

Tanya and Kate sprang into action immediately, each cornering a Volturi brother. For her part, Kate relished shocking Caius repeatedly with her gift. Garrett hung back and let Kate have her fun with him. After caressing Carlisle's fingers, Esme moved to assist Tanya with Marcus. She had made the decision to allow Edward and Carlisle the chance to take out Aro together.

"You're a great man, Carlisle," Aro murmured lazily, tenting his fingers in front of him as he watched their slow approach. "You of all people have to understand my position, why I did what I did."

"No," Carlisle said, shaking his head fiercely so that his blonde hair hung in his eyes. "I can't say that I do. You stole my life, my _memories_, and what purpose did it serve?"

"He's here, isn't he?" Aro said, shrugging. "And look at what he's brought with him … really, she's splendid, Edward. You have far better taste than I would have imagined. Far richer, even, than my own."

From across the room, Edward heard a guttural grunt as Bella ripped Renata's head off. He turned to see that Bella had already torn off her arms. She stood over the decimated body, her shoulders heaving with the sobs coming out of her mouth. Bella had loved Maggie, and though Edward knew that killing her murderer wouldn't heal her completel, he hoped it would at least make room for her to begin the process. He hoped it would help him to heal as well. As Bella moved toward the fire, Edward turned his attention back to Aro.

"Do you truly think you could control her?" Edward asked, his head cocked to the side. "She is magnificent, there's no doubt of that. But do you think anyone could control her?"

The spry, old vampire leapt from his throne and seized Edward's arm viciously, a gleam in his crimson eyes. Edward stood placidly, looking him levelly in the eye as Aro's expression moved from victorious to uncertain.

"Having difficulty hearing me?" Edward murmured. "That's her, actually. What's nice is that I can hear _you_ just fine."

Aro gripped Edward's arm tighter, a wild look in his eye as he attempted to hear his memories. Edward smiled and allowed Aro one last attempt at seeing his thoughts. Bella had him safely shielded and he knew that all of his memories were safe. When he'd had enough of Aro's clutching, he snatched the old vampire around his throat and pinned him against the wall. His body slamming against the black marble wall made the room shudder.

Tanya and Esme paused, their teeth at Marcus's throat, as did Kate and Garrett. Kate had beheaded Caius and was in the process of throwing his body on the flames. Tanya was about to deal the killing blow to Marcus. As Edward held Aro squirming against the wall, he allowed the once-powerful leader to take in the destruction that lay around him.

"Look around you," he whispered hoarsely. "See what's become of your kingdom on high. Your brothers are dead. Your guard has been killed or defected. There is _nothing _left."

As Edward spoke, Marcus let out a wail as Tanya finished him off. Aro didn't even flinch, his red eyes rolling around in his head as he looked for a non-existent escape route. When both Caius and Marcus were thrown into the fire, everyone gathered around where Edward held Aro.

"Unshield me, Bella," Edward said.

"What?" she asked, shocked.

"I said, unshield me. I want him to see what he did to us before he dies. I want him to _feel_ it as only he can through his gift."

It took a moment, but Edward felt the familiar unpleasantness that accompanied Aro's gift. It wormed through his subconscious, absorbing everything. Like no one else, Aro and Edward could truly communicate silently. Had Aro been anyone else, it might have been possible for Edward to appreciate that gift. As it was, he despised the connection between himself and the wretched leader.

_It didn't have to hurt for so many years,_ Aro said in his mind. _I would have given their memories back had you chosen to come willingly._

_And what then?_ Edward asked. _When they had their memories back and they chose to leave, as you know they would have, what then?_

_You don't give them credit enough. They would have wished to stay with you._

_You would have _made _them stay,_ Edward countered. _You would have threatened them in order to keep me and Alice._

"We can still rule, Edward," Aro said aloud. "My brothers, the guard … they are nothing compared to what you and I and your lovely mate could be together."

Edward grimaced, but it was Carlisle who growled and leapt at the pinned leader. With a feral snarl, he grabbed hold of Aro by his long black hair. Edward pivoted and allowed Carlisle to take Aro down, holding his head within the circle of his arm and baring his teeth against his exposed neck.

"Look at him," Carlisle growled, turning Aro's head toward Edward. "Look at him closely. You're not _worthy_ of my son."

Carlisle sank his teeth into Aro's neck before the old leader had a chance to respond, severing his head instantly. In the silence that followed, Edward watched numbly as his father sank to his knees, the grey carcass of Aro Volturi lying motionless in front of him.

* * *

They carried Aro's remains down and out of the tower. The fighting was almost over when they emerged, but even those still engaged stopped in their tracks as they saw the familiar head with its long, black hair in Carlisle's hands. Edward carried his body.

They didn't speak as they approached the enormous bonfire that had been lit in the courtyard. Vampires trickled over to the site, their eyes and minds a confused mix of emotions. Some were cautiously jubilant that this was truly the end; others were less easily convinced. They watched as Carlisle and Edward stepped up to the flames, followed by Bella, Esme, Tanya, Kate, and Garrett.

Carlisle looked around, his face pinched as he saw the sea of immortal bodies burning in front of him. He looked past the smoking heap at those who had gathered around, those who had survived. Edward saw his sister, Alice, along with Jasper. He saw Emmett and Rose standing with Demetri and Kenneth. All around, he saw those who had once been on opposing sides mixing together and pondering what this uneasy ending might mean for their race.

"The era of the Volturi has come to an end," Carlisle said, holding up Aro's head. "I don't know what comes next … but I suggest that we lay down our grievances and come together to find a solution."

He threw the head into the fire and Edward followed suit with Aro's body. The cheer started small, with only one or two members clapping, but it soon caught and almost everyone gathered around cheered at the end of the most oppressive reigns anyone either mortal or immortal had ever seen.

* * *

_**A/N**__: And there you have it: the battle royale that I promised you all has occurred. I know that there will be some tears … trust me, I cried them myself as I wrote this chapter. There is nothing so gut-wrenching as to kill a character that you love and is close to your heart. There are still a few things left to happen in this story. For one, I really want to give Bella a chance to talk with all of the Cullens, but Carlisle especially. I think that their scientific minds deserve some time to go over the papers that brought her to his rescue. I also want to give Edward and Bella a chance to discuss Maggie's death … I think that Bella will be able to release Edward from some of the guilt he's feeling right now. I have outlined one more chapter and an epilogue, but I'm also considering doing an outtake at some point from Alice's POV. I know that MANY of you wanted to hear more about their reunion. If you'd like that, I'd be happy to oblige with an outtake. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, despite the sadness. I'm taking a few days to finish up my Age of Edward one shot that I will post to my profile before February 5__th__. Shouldn't delay posting of the next chapter of TFP by more than a couple of days. It's an Elizabethanward, so if you like Shakespeare, check it out! Much love, Jen._


	31. Back to Thetford

_So I walk up on high_

_And I step to the edge_

_To see my world below._

_And I laugh at myself_

_While the tears roll down._

'_Cause it's the world I know._

_It's the world I know._

_**The World I Know**__, Collective Soul, 1995_

_Many thanks to my own Red Pen Goddesses, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, and Shasta53._

_Twilight and its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer._

_A note about this and last chapter. Volterra and the Volturi are quite different in this than in Twi. Aro and his brothers didn't set themselves on high to police the immortals; rather, they set themselves over others so that they could be the most powerful and possess anything that they wanted. So the question of who will take over Volterra isn't as pressing as it might have been if they had the same role as they did in the saga._

* * *

The Cullens, along with Tanya's family, left Volterra as quickly as they could. The once-proud city was in ruins and for those who chose to remain, there would be a long road ahead. More vampires than Bella had expected seemed willing to join in the reconstruction effort. None of the Cullens, however, had any interest in remaining to help. There was a sense as they walked away that Volterra would experience a reincarnation as a place free from the dictatorial rule of the Volturi brothers. Bella hoped that one day it would be a place that all immortals could come together without fear of discovery – that would be the ultimate defeat of Aro and all he stood for.

Despite getting his family back, Edward was reserved. Bella had expected him to be quiet with her, but he seemed more than simply subdued. There was something brewing within her mate, and she intended to get to the bottom of it. Bella knew that before she could do that, however, she owed him an apology for her choices. In the end, her decision paid off. It didn't excuse the fact that she knew it would hurt Edward to do it. She only hoped that, in time, he would be able to forgive her for keeping him in the dark.

They traveled quickly, only stopping during the brightest hours of the day. Tanya's family left them quietly, overcome with grief for their lost sister. Garrett, unsurprisingly, went with them. Bella wondered when they'd see the Denalis again. She'd grown very fond of all of them and hoped that they would remain in close contact.

When the Cullens reached the Southwold coast of England, there was a noticeable buzz running through the family. They were approaching their home. There was not much chatter as they made their way through Thetford Forest toward the castle, but Bella was silently pleased that Carlisle was leading the way. Whatever Leo had done to their minds while they were in Volterra appeared not to be long-lasting. They remembered the way to their home perfectly.

Carlisle stopped short when he reached the wide dirt path that gave way to the gravel walkway of their home. His eyes were unreadable, but Bella could see Carlisle's thoughts reflected in Edward's face. There were many emotions passing across her mate's face, and she drank them all in. He'd been so quiet, so reserved since leaving Volterra – it did Bella's heart good to see him enjoy the family's homecoming.

Suddenly, Edward's face grew dark as he cocked his head to the side, looking at his father.

"Why?" he asked, his voice confused.

"I can tell there is much you're dealing with right now, and I think you need the time."

"But I want …" Edward began, looking up toward the castle. Carlisle stopped him with a hand on his arm.

They seemed to share a silent conversation and soon, Edward looked down at the ground, clearly defeated. Bella didn't like to see him like that, but she guessed that Carlisle had noticed Edward's mood as easily as she had. Tentatively, she slipped her hand into his. He sighed at the contact and that simple noise filled Bella with great pleasure. Her touch had always relaxed him.

"I just don't understand why it has to be now, Carlisle," Edward said impertinently, his eyes flitting between Bella and his father.

"Because I want you to come home as I have – whole and healed. You are not that right now, and everyone here can see it."

Silence met Carlisle's words, but Bella could see in everyone's faces that they agreed with his assessment. She tugged on Edward's hand gently, pulling him toward the forest path and away from his family.

"Come with me," she whispered. "We'll be back in no time."

Edward looked back at his family as they walked down the path. They stood and watched Bella lead Edward toward the forest before turning toward the house. Edward sighed, shaking his head.

"What just happened?" Edward asked, his brows lowered in annoyance. "We've just brought them home. I wanted to stay with them."

"I know, but Carlisle was right," Bella replied, shaking her head. "You need some time."

"What I need is for everyone to stop handling me," he roared, turning away.

Edward ran full speed in the direction of the meadow, and Bella followed, allowing him to stay far ahead of her. When he reached the clearing, he leaned his palms against a thick tree trunk, his back heaving. Bella knew enough to give him some space; she wouldn't be able to get him to speak by forcing him to look at her.

"I'm sorry," Edward whispered, banging his head rhythmically against the tree. "You don't deserve this … what you did saved their lives."

She had expected the outburst to be about her actions, and she was ready to take responsibility for the hurt she had caused him. Still, it stung to hear him struggling so hard to forgive her. It frightened her.

"What I did was cowardly," Bella murmured. "I don't pretend it was the best choice, Edward. Nor was deceiving you something I'm proud of. I just didn't know … I was so afraid that if I told you, you'd follow and you'd be killed trying to protect me. I didn't trust you to trust _me_."

Edward turned in a flash, his golden eyes wide for the first time since they left Volterra. "I imagined the worst – every minute you were gone was an agony to me. You can't know …"

"Of course I can!" Bella exclaimed. "You think it was easy to leave you, Edward? You think I didn't worry every second that you were somehow ahead of us?"

He groaned, and shook his head. "It was an imperfect situation."

"I think that's what they call 'putting it lightly,'" Bella said with a small snort.

Edward looked at her, looked _through_ her as he so often did, and for the first time she wanted to swap gifts with him. She wanted to see inside his head, find all of the spots that were hurting and see exactly what he needed her to do in order to fix them. Since it was impossible for her to do that, Bella did the next best thing. Setting aside her shield, she allowed Edward into her mind.

They sat down beneath the tree together, their knees touching as Bella revealed her thoughts before and during their time away from each other. Somewhere during their silent exchange, Edward slipped his hands over hers, and she knew that all was forgiven. It wasn't healed, and it wasn't forgotten – for beings such as themselves, how could it be? – but he accepted her decision.

"I want to make this right," Bella said finally. "Something has been wrong since Volterra, and I don't believe it's only me. Tell me what I can do."

Edward's eyes were haunted with memories. Again, Bella wished that she could look within to see what ailed him. Instead, she knelt up in front of him and framed his face with her hands. He sighed, gently tilting his head into her hand. She thought he would tell her then, but instead, he moved quickly toward her.

Edward scooped Bella up off of the ground, his mouth hot and needy on hers as he carried her across the clearing toward the trees. He covered her chin, neck and chest with open-mouthed kisses, making Bella throw her head back in ecstasy. It had been so long since they were together – alone like this. Her body had been crying out for his since they'd been reunited, but there had been precious few moments when they'd been alone. It had never seemed the right time. Now, however, there would be no interruptions.

Edward's hands knew Bella's body; his body knew all of her curves. Once across the clearing, he laid her in a patch of high grass and ran his fingers lightly across her stomach, tracing the O of her bellybutton in tantalizing circles. She shivered and shook beneath his touch, closing her eyes as his fingers pushed her shirt higher.

"Open," he whispered roughly.

Bella's eyes flashed open, finding his eyes immediately. They were dark and stormy, hiding the memories that had plagued him. But they were vulnerable, too. She could see the hurt roiling below the surface, begging for release. If it was release Edward craved, Bella could give that to him.

"Everything," he said, his eyes darting up toward her forehead.

_Oh_, she thought. They'd never made love with her shield down. She hadn't been practiced enough with it to try. Also, she just hadn't thought about it. But now that Edward asked for her shield to be down, she could definitely see the appeal. Bella would like to hear Edward's every thought, but especially when they were being intimate. She couldn't think of anything more amazing. She pushed the shield aside, her eyes never leaving his.

_This is different_, she thought.

"It's something I've thought of from the first," Edward murmured, his eyes lidded as he brushed his fingers over the rise of her breasts. He smiled as her thoughts raced. "I want to hear everything, Bella."

_It's all yours._ Her thoughts moved quickly, but she knew that Edward could follow them easily. _Every thought, every emotion – everything is yours._

Edward purred as he gently eased her shirt over her head. It was a delicious sound, one that Bella hadn't heard in so long. _I love that sound,_ she thought. _I remember the first time I heard it_.

"Do you, really?" Edward murmured, kneading her breast lazily in one palm. "Relive it for me."

It wasn't a question, and the demand sent a thrill through her. Edward smiled wickedly in response. Bella found that she enjoyed Edward having a direct line into her mind; he responded immediately to her every thought, moving so quickly it was as though he was anticipating her desires.

_It was the night you came into my room,_ she reminisced. _I remember being disoriented … unsure why you were there and what you wanted of me. And then you made that sound – right after I said your name. It ran right through me, just like it's doing now. Touch me, Edward. Please._

His fingers grazed her nipples, pinching gently as he reached the tip. Bella arched her back. _So good_, her mind repeated over and over as he applied mild pressure to her sensitive breasts.

The moment she thought about Edward's mouth on her, it was there – his tongue teasing her nipples and his teeth nipping around the peak. Just as she became frantic for him to move to the other side, he was there – touching, tasting, eliciting moan after moan from her lips. Bella's thoughts were on a roller coaster, begging for what she wanted but what she would never ask for herself, and Edward followed each request without hesitation.

_Need to feel you_, her thoughts begged.

Her jeans came off in a rustle of fabric followed by her underwear. _Yours, _she thought forcefully. Edward smiled and shook his head.

"Not yet," he drawled, his golden eyes moving up and down her body greedily.

Bella's hips moved from side to side as she eyed the bulge in Edward's pants. She wanted it, and like a feral animal, she licked her lips in anticipation. Edward ran a finger along the plane of her stomach, outlining the lips of her opening before continuing down her leg toward her knees.

Bella was frustrated, her eyes closed in anxiousness for his fingers, his tongue, _anything_ to touch her where she needed to be touched. Edward splayed his hand across the back of her thigh, making her shiver as he gripped the curve of her ass. Bella's breath caught in her throat as her mind raced wildly through different scenarios. She knew he'd seen the thought of him flipping her over, taking her from behind. He'd seen her imagine his hand stinging her backside as it came down roughly on her flesh.

"Over," Edward said, applying pressure to her backside.

Bella moaned, and scurried to comply, leaning on her elbows and exposing her backside to him. She heard him draw in a ragged breath as his hand traced each cheek and trailed down her thighs. His fingers gentle, ever so soft, as they caressed each curve. Bella's lips trembled, her thighs shook with need, and she begged him over and over to give her some release.

_Touch me, dammit,_ she thought harshly. _Need to feel you._

She groaned as she heard him chuckle and continue moving over her flesh in a tantalizing dance.

"It's been far too long," Edward murmured, his breath puffing against her back as he knelt behind her. "I intend to make this last."

Bella felt like she might cry. His teasing touch had whipped her into a frenzy. As he continued to move slowly, she squeezed her thighs together, bucking her hips just slightly to feel some friction. In an instant, Edward stayed her hip and then grabbed her ass. Her mind went blank for a moment as he squeezed and then it was racing again.

Bella moved her hips back toward Edward, smiling when he groaned at the contact. The hand around her waist moved to her stomach and down lower, reaching between her legs. Bella couldn't stand it any longer; she thought she might explode the moment his finger slipped within her.

Infuriatingly, Edward didn't. Instead he cupped her, applying just enough pressure to drive her crazy with want, but not enough to give her the release she needed.

Bella moved with him, her ass brushing against his hardness with each slow movement. When she thought she might not be able to take it any longer, Edward slid one long finger within her. Bella froze, her mouth and eyes open as her body shook. He hovered over her, leaning on one arm so that his chest pressed against her back. His finger didn't move once he was inside, only rested against her throbbing center as she shivered with the delicious pressure. A keening moan began to rise in her throat. She wanted release so badly; she could feel it bubbling up within her. Edward pressed himself against her, steadying himself, and then moved his nose along her shoulder blade.

Bella could feel his lips moving against her skin, and she could feel the warm breath tickling every nerve. When he reached the center of her back, he opened his mouth and traced a circle over her spine with his tongue. His finger within her matched the circular pattern, sending ripples of pleasure down Bella's back. Again, her mouth hung open, and she held her breath in anticipation.

_Anything,_ her mind cried. _Anything you do feels so good_.

When she gave up making demands, Edward finally relented. He sucked her skin harshly into his mouth, biting down just enough to make her moan. At the same time, he added two more fingers within her and pumped rhythmically with her hips. She didn't last long. Edward had wound her so tightly that she was crying out his name in under a minute, bucking against him with her release.

Edward didn't draw out her orgasm, moving away from her in a flash of movement. Bella heard the whisper of fabric and flipped her hair over so that she could see him. He knelt, shimmering in the afternoon sun, behind her. Her dead heart ached with how much she loved him, and he smiled at the thought. Bella didn't believe they would ever make love with her shield in place again; allowing him to see everything was perhaps the greatest turn on she'd ever experienced.

Edward moved her more gently this time, laying her down in the grass and hovering over top of her. His eyes were quieter as Bella looked deeply into them, but there was still darkness there. _What happened to you?_ she thought, reaching her hand up to cup his cheek. His brow furrowed, and he grimaced. The painful look shot worry through her, and she pushed herself up on her elbows to reach his face with her lips.

_Shh, be still. I'm here. I love you._

Edward's mouth moved roughly with hers, and she could feel the tension within him. Bella kissed him back with as much fervor, reveling in the noises Edward made as he kissed her. He broke away panting, leaning his forehead against hers as he looked into her eyes.

"I can't be gentle," he murmured, running a shaking hand down her chest and over her nipples.

She arched up, begging him silently for the rough touch he'd given earlier. He obliged, the corner of his mouth twitching up in a grin.

_Take what you need from me_, she thought calmly. _I'm yours, and I want to give you everything._

In a blinding movement, Edward had lifted her leg up and over his shoulder. Bella cried out as he bent his head down to her neck, kissing and sucking roughly at the flesh just over her scar. She folded her body for him, bringing her center up to meet him. He groaned as he moved swiftly home, filling her completely and then moving away just as quickly.

Edward kept a frantic pace, pulsing in and out in a frenzied rhythm. Bella chanted his name in her head and soon began to moan his name in time with her thoughts. All the while, Edward was quiet and concentrated, focusing on moving within her.

Bella could feel the tension grow within her as the tidal wave of pleasure grew. She could feel herself cresting the plateau of her second orgasm, but held on – wanting to fall with Edward. She focused on him, opening her eyes to watch as he moved over her. He was a beautiful angel. His golden eyes were crinkled and focused on her and the worry line that had formed before had faded and was replaced with a look of determination.

Knowing he was close, Bella angled her hips and thrust upward to meet him. Their bodies slapped together roughly, but Edward's eyes fluttered as a moan escaped his lips.

_You like_, Bella thought with a smile.

Edward moaned again, nodding his head once. Again, Bella matched his powerful thrusts with her own. The combination of their movements brought him deeper within her, and it sent the waves of desire spiraling through her. Edward's speed increased and Bella matched him. As he came, Bella cried out her own pleasure, throwing her head back in wild release.

* * *

"You're right," Edward said lazily as he lay next to her, spent. "We're never doing that with your shield up again."

"Never is a long time for beings like us," Bella replied cheekily. "I wouldn't rule anything out."

The ease between them was so comforting to Bella; it hadn't been like this since well before their time in Volterra. She rolled onto her side, tracing circles on his bare chest.

"You want to talk about it?" she asked, her eyes on the patterns her fingers made on his skin.

"I suppose I have to," he replied, sighing.

"You don't, really," Bella insisted, looking up at him quickly. "I mean, you probably do … but it doesn't have to be right away."

Edward chuckled and covered her hand with his.

"Now is as good a time as any," he said, shaking his head. "It's about Maggie."

Bella dropped her head to his shoulder and nodded, sighing softly. She'd known that her death had affected all of them, but she imagined it had to be inscrutably more difficult for Edward who had actually heard her thoughts as she died. Bella laced her fingers with his and waited as his chest rose and fell for several minutes before he began speaking again.

"Maggie knew that going up to that tower was a suicide mission," Edward said, his thumb stroking the inside of Bella's palm as he spoke. "She went willingly though, because to her the sacrifice was worth it."

"For you?" Bella murmured. Edward opened eyes and looked at her, surprised. "Oh, Edward. It was the only lie she ever really worked to tell you, I think."

"She'd never been able to make her gift work on me before," Edward insisted.

"Because she never _truly_ wanted you to believe it."

He was silent for several minutes. "Did she tell you?"

Bella shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "No. But I knew from the first moment I met her that she was in love with you."

Edward shook his head slowly, a crease forming between his brows. "I should have known. I shouldn't have led her on … taken advantage."

"No!" Bella cried, sitting up so that she could run her fingers over the crease between his eyes. "No. She didn't see it that way, and neither must you."

"How can I see it any differently, Bella?"

"She loved you, yes. But I think Maggie was as practical as they come. She didn't expect anything more from your time together than a little comfort. For _both_ of you. So what if you didn't realize you were giving her as much comfort as she was giving you?"

Edward sat up and faced his Bella, his eyes troubled with memories of Maggie. "It seems awful knowing that she cared so much, and I cared so little."

"I don't believe that for an instant," Bella huffed. "You cared for Maggie a great deal. You trusted her. You entrusted her with _me_."

"It's not the same as what I saw in her head before…"

"No, but it wasn't as though you'd promised her anything. You were honest with her. She couldn't be honest with you, Edward. Not and get the contact she so desperately needed. Don't you see? She knew what she was getting into, and she chose that path. Were her thoughts regretful?"

"Far from it," Edward replied immediately. "That made it so much worse for me. She died with a smile on her face."

"She died thinking of you," Bella said, touching his cheek. "Maggie wouldn't have wanted you to beat yourself up over this. Remember her with kindness, remember her loyalty to all of us, but don't regret your actions. That would be the greatest disservice you could do her."

It took some time, but Edward was finally able to sigh and nod. The weight that Bella knew might never fully be lifted from him seemed to lighten as he straightened up and reached for her clothes, offering them to her with a smile.

"Thank you for that, love," he murmured. "Now, I think it's about time we got back to our family."

Bella smiled radiantly at the term _our_. She couldn't wait to get back to the castle and see how the family dynamic played out.

* * *

As Bella and Edward approached the house, she immediately crouched low, in a defensive posture. She could smell at least one of the Volturi guard members nearby, and it set her senses into overdrive. Before she could pounce, however, Edward gently touched her arm and shook his head.

"It's Demetri and Kenneth. They've come in good faith, and they have no ill intent. They're with the family now. Come."

They ran the rest of the way, Bella's mind racing with questions as to why the guard members would have followed them and how their presence could be considered in any way good.

The family was assembled in the library, broken off naturally in pairs around a roaring fire. Kenneth and Demetri sat close together, one of Kenneth's hands resting lightly on Demetri's shoulders. Seeing their red eyes dart around the room apprehensively put Bella slightly at ease. They had come out of their comfortable element and put themselves in a position of deference to a larger group of vampires. Also, Edward walked into the room easily, his stance open and welcoming. His very presence put the rest of the family at an even greater ease. Bella followed him over to the fur rug and sat down next him, her back leaning gently against his chest and his arms held lightly around her waist.

Carlisle and Esme sat comfortably on the couch together, Esme's hand stroking the back of her husband's hair. Questions pummeled Bella's mind, not only pertaining to the sudden arrival of Demetri and Kenneth. She wanted to know about the Cullens' time in Volterra, how much they truly remembered of their time under Leo's control, and whether they could fill in the gaps left in her exhaustive research of the papers.

"As you can see, we've been joined by two guests," Carlisle said, motioning to Kenneth and Demetri. "They assure us that they've come in peace and that they have information that we might find useful."

Edward nodded, a smile crossing his face. "Indeed they do. I think _Bella_ will be most interested to hear that, Demetri. It was the one thing she could not reconcile in her study of the papers."

Bella paused for a moment, thinking back on her research and wondering what aspect Edward might be referring to and then it hit her suddenly. "The journals?" she asked, looking from Carlisle to Demetri and then to Edward. "Does he know about the journals?"

Edward gestured toward Demetri in deference to the other vampire, but Carlisle spoke up. "Are you referring to my medical journals, Bella?"

"Yes, Dr. Cullen," Bella replied.

"Please. Call me Carlisle. We're family now."

Bella looked down somewhat shyly before smiling. "Carlisle, I finally determined where Leo's gift might have a weakness by reading through your journals and the 'Mutation Journal' you notated during your … stay in Volterra."

"Let's call it as it is, my dear," Carlisle said with a grimace. "During our imprisonment. Yes, the Mutation Journal … that was a fascinating find. I was sorely disappointed when it, along with many of my journals, went missing at the beginning of this year." His golden eyes flicked over toward Demetri. "Is this disappearance something you can shed light on, son?"

Edward, along with Jasper and Emmett, chuckled lowly into their hands at the tone of their father's voice. Bella could hear the commanding tenor, the quality of leadership that brooked no lies. She guessed that at different occasions, the brothers had all been on the receiving end of that tone.

"Yes, sir," Demetri said, covering Kenneth's hand with his own protectively when the other vampire squeezed Demetri's shoulder. "I took those journals from your rooms."

"None of this 'sir' business," Esme said, her voice light and warm. "You are here as our guests and you will call us by our names."

Demetri nodded, his shoulders relaxing minutely. Kenneth still appeared tense.

"Why did ye take the journals?" Emmett asked, his brows knitting together.

His eyes flicked between Demetri and Edward, as though asking Edward what he should do to the thief. Edward held up one finger and Emmett frowned, looking back at Demetri and waiting for an answer.

"Because it was long past time someone challenged Aro," he said with a sigh. "I couldn't do it … whatever invisible chains they'd tied 'round us guard members were simply too tight for me to break free. But I sensed that, in the right hands, those journals might bring someone who _could_ challenge Aro to Volterra."

"What did you do with them?" Carlisle asked.

"I sold them, en masse, to an artifact dealer in Venice. Aro had kept tabs on Edward and Alice, very close tabs, so I knew Edward's name and the circles he ran in. I sent the dealer to England with the express instructions to contact an E. Masen with regard to the journals. I assured him Mr. Masen would pay any price he asked for them. Sorry about that."

Edward flashed a toothy smile and waved Demetri off. "I have plenty of resources at my disposal."

Bella was not so easily deterred. "Didn't the dealer question how you'd gotten your hands on so many journals spanning such a long period of time by _one man_?"

Demetri shrugged. "He never asked. I quoted him a price for the lot that was next to nothing. He wasn't about to ask questions."

"The dealer never suspected that the journals were all by the same man," Edward continued. "He assumed they were from a family of doctors, all with similar hand writing. He wasn't the kind of dealer who authenticated his finds; he just sold them to the highest bidder. Me, in this instance."

"So, Bella, you found what you needed from these journals?" Carlisle asked, tenting his fingers in front of his face.

Bella nodded. "It became clear to me that Leo required close proximity in order to continue his hold over you and your family. I was uniquely positioned to cut him off from you and provide the distance needed to see if his tie to you could be severed. It turned out, however, that his death would be the only way to truly break that tie."

"Leo was a sad creature," Esme said, shaking her head. "There was a measure of madness to him at times, some more than others."

"In the end, he begged me to kill him," Bella said, bowing her head. "There was so much chaos in his eyes … I can't imagine what it would have been like to live inside that head."

"I only had conjectures about what his mind was like," Carlisle said. "I guessed that he was not only cutting off our access to our own memories, but actually absorbing them in some way. Though, since we all regained what we had lost, he couldn't have truly _eaten_ them."

"No," Alice said, her voice airy. "I suspect the memories swirled like a vortex in his mind." She shivered, and Jasper wrapped his arms more tightly around her. "Looking into his future nearly drove me mad; to live it every day would have been torture."

"It's no less, or more, than what Aro did to every member of his guard," Kenneth said, speaking for the first time. His hand was wound tightly with Demetri's.

"The difference with Leo is that he should never have been turned," Carlisle said gently. "One might argue whether or not turning any of us was right, but Leo more than any should never have been given immortality. His gift drove him insane as a human. To turn someone like that was the very essence of madness itself. Leo's only salvation from the hell he was living in was death."

The family sat quietly for a moment, and Bella looked curiously at Demetri and Kenneth. They both seemed different now that they were away from Volturi rule. For one, they seemed to have found happiness in each other. She wondered whether Aro and his brothers forbade the members of the guard to mate. Also, they seemed more at ease now that Demetri's secret was out. She wondered what they'd do next and if they might wish to stay with the family for some time.

"I do wonder though," Esme said, her head cocked to the side. "When we were going up to confront Aro, Demetri, you spoke to Carlisle and Edward. You said that you wouldn't have guessed what the Volturi were capable of. What did you mean? And how did you hide what you'd done from Edward."

"He wasn't thinking about the journals at that moment," Edward said, looking up at his mother. "I did hear him repeating over and over that he'd been right."

Demetri nodded. "I was disillusioned with the Volturi, that's true. But there was always a nagging worry that I was just being selfish."

"That was Chelsea and Corin," Carlisle said, assuredly. "Their gifts combined to make you feel tied to the Volturi brothers and to make you feel great respect and love for them as well."

"Centuries of service without any thanks had made that respect and love wear thin. Once Chelsea and Corin were dead, however, I could see through everything."

"It was the same for me," Kenneth said.

"Were you mated before?" Alice asked.

"No," Demetri replied with a smile. "Very few of the regular guard and none of the elites were bonded pairs. I suspect that Aro wanted all of our devotion for himself."

All of the vampires in the room nodded their agreement.

"What will ye do now?" Emmett asked.

"We don't know," Demetri said, looking shyly at his mate. "It's very new to us to have choices and to be beholden only to each other."

"I extend our hospitality to you both and invite you to stay here at Thetford castle for as long as you wish." Carlisle's forehead creased only slightly as he looked over at his red-eyed son. "You will not be the only ones who follow the traditional diet."

Jasper looked down, and Alice stroked the back of his neck protectively. Bella had always wondered how Jasper's continued traditional lifestyle affected the others. She could see in Carlisle's eyes a bit of sadness that one of his own sons did not partake of the gentler diet.

"Truth be told, sir, we are both interested in your animal diet," Kenneth said. "The group of you seem so tightly bonded and without any of the tricks and games that Aro used. It intrigues us."

Carlisle smiled radiantly. "We would be happy to share our home with you, as well as our philosophy."

Bella's eyes traveled over Alice and Jasper who appeared to be engaging in a silent conversation.

"Jasper, we've all of us slipped up," Alice said softly.

She looked around the room, each member of the family keenly aware of Jasper's silent struggle, and Alice's pleading looks. Edward squeezed Bella's hands before rising and moving across the room to kneel next to Jasper.

"She's right," he murmured softly. "This diet isn't easy. None of us expect you to adapt immediately."

"Or even within a few centuries, eh?" Jasper asked, a half smile on his face. "It's been long enough. I'm ready to try."

The look of relief on Carlisle's face was palpable, a heady mixture of pride and excitement. There was room for error, and Bella knew well enough that Jasper wasn't the only member of the Cullen clan who was likely to commit an error. Now she was no longer alone in the frailty of her control; she would have the company of Jasper, Demetri and Kenneth to help her along the way.

The concept that she suddenly had a vampire family didn't strike Bella as odd as she would have once thought. There was comfort in the room around her, despite the many gifts and range of ages that were gathered there. There were many stories still to be told, and questions that would need to be answered. But Bella understood that there would be time enough for that another day.

After all, they had the rest of forever to enjoy each other's company.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ This is the final "regular" chapter of The Foreign Papers. 'Scuse me while I snot-sob into my hankie. I am truly blessed to have so many lovely, vocal readers of this story. When I started this, back as a little wit-fit thread, I thought it was a compelling idea. When I pulled it out of the wit-fit forum to make it a full length multi-chapter story, I never could have imagined the kind of response it would get. I'm not an author who judges success by numbers, but to see the number of you who have felt compelled to leave a review for this story, whether it was once or every chapter, warms my heart in ways I can't rightly express. I hope that you enjoyed the story. There will be a small, fluffy epilogue that will post in a week or two. In perhaps a month or two, I have an AH short multi-chapter that will begin posting. It will be complete when I start posting and will post weekly. Those of you who donated to Fandom for Texas will know it: Butterflies are Free to Fly._

_One last thing. I posted my Age of Edward one-shot to my profile: Playing for the Heart of a Lady. It would mean a lot to me if you could check it out. It's Elizabethanward and I'm told by my beta that he is swoon-worthy. ;)_

_Thanks so much for all of the love. I love you all right back. *mwah* ~Jen_


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